Hey everyone! It's been a long time since I've written a CCS fic! So here goes nothing… I hope you enjoy it and please review!
Kinomoto Sakura collapsed onto her beat-up couch in her apartment. A long day at school and then a fight with her boyfriend added to her tiredness. Things have been going all wrong for her. Nothing seems to be going to the way she had planned. She thought going away to college at Tokyo University would be a good idea since she would be away from her annoying brother and overbearing father. She also thought living on her own would mean no rules, staying up until dawn, parties, and having guys sleep over. College isn't any better than high school neither is the people. However with her romantic view of how life would be after high school, she's quickly finding out how wrong she was.
It's nice to be away from her brother and dad, but she misses them in a way. It surprises her that she could admit that after she has said how much she hated living with them. She missed having her dad waiting on the couch until she came home and having her brother tease and make fun of her. It comforted her in a way that she couldn't explain.
Living by herself was fun…at first. Having late night parties, getting drunk, going out whenever she wanted and well, partying, which is all she did. She liked socializing and just hanging out with her friends, but after a while it got boring and expensive. She had to pay for rent every month, which can't be late, and for food and clothes. She can't believe it, but when her friends call to ask her to go out with them she uses her dad's line: I'm not made of money!
However, the thing that hurts her the much is not having a boyfriend. She hasn't had one in years, maybe decades--that's what is feels like anyway. She wants to be loved and someone to always be there for her. But getting a guys isn't like getting a cold, it's not easy.
"Sakura," she said to herself with a long sigh. "How are you ever going to make it on your own?"
She sat up, her back feeling heavy. All of her worrying turned into excess weight thrown over her back. She carried it every day, her shoulders shrinking outward, as if she was a little hunchback cowering her way through a crowd.
"Maybe I'll never meet a guy…" she mused. "I'll be alone forever."
As she stood up, the phone started to ring. She quickly shifted her eyes to the clock on the wall. It said five minutes to midnight. She wondered who would call her at this hour. Curiosity got the best of her and she went over to the phone and picked it up.
"Hello, this is Sakura," she said.
A muffled voice came on the phone with loud music playing in the background. "Sakura? Is that you?"
"Yeah," she said. "Who is this?"
The voice on the phone became louder. "Sakura! This is Tomoyo," she said. "I need your help! It's important."
Sakura began to wonder what Tomoyo, her best friend in the world, wanted. She sounded frightened and anxious all at the same time. She didn't know what to think about it. Could Tomoyo be in danger? Or is it just another call wanting to bring a guy she met at some party over to her apartment, since her dorm mate won't allow guys in the room? Sakura wasn't sure, but she suspected the latter.
Expecting what she was going to say, she asked it anyway. "What is it, Tomoyo?"
Tomoyo sighed in relief. "I…met this guys at a party," she started. "He's so gorgeous! He's like one of those hot guys in afternoon doramas. He's so…"
"Tomoyo," Sakura said flatly. She didn't want to stand there, listening to how perfect her love life is and how hers sucks. She honestly just wanted to go to bed and sleep her life away. "You can bring him over."
"Oh, thanks, Sakura!" she exclaimed. "You're are such a good friend! I love you so much!"
"Love you, too," she said, and hung up the phone.
Sakura sat down in her room, staring at herself in the mirror. Her reflection made her realize how much she had worked her body to the limit. The person staring back at her was a stranger. She had never seen this person before. She never had dark circles underneath her eyes nor her hair stringy and pulled up in a ponytail. She looked at least twenty years older than her actual age, nineteen.
How did I let myself get this way? Why didn't I see these effects beforehand? she asked herself, as she lightly touched her face. She could not believe it. As much as she tried to tell herself beauty on the inside is the only thing that matters, she could not ,make herself believe it. She could not lie to herself about that. No one could. We all care more about the outside than we do about the inside anyway.
She let down her hair. It fell a few inches past her shoulders. It looked gangly and dull. She missed the way it used to shine and how soft it was. School and life have been getting in the way with her doing her hair like she used to. It's sad, but true.
--
An hour passed and there was a knock at the door. Sakura stumbled through the living room to open it. When she did, her mouth dropped. There stood Tomoyo, a little buzzed, and on her back was a decent-looking guy with a beer bottle in his hand. He looked wasted, but yet, still alive.
"Who is that, Tomoyo?" Sakura asked, sniping.
Tomoyo boosted him up on her back and looked up at her. "His name is Syaoran. Isn't he gorgeous?"
Sakura wanted to say no, but she couldn't let down her best friend. "Yeah, he's gorgeous alright."
"Well then, why don't you help me get him on the couch?" she said.
Sakura quickly grabbed his arm and they carried him into the living room. They slowly laid him down on the couch. He slapped the cousins like a dead fish. She couldn't help to feel that he is just like one of the other lame guys she has brought over. It all goes the same way: she brings them over in some shape or form, gives them what they need, and then she never sees them again. Typical.
His opened as a smile streamed across his face. "Is that your mom, Tomoyo?" he asked, his breath smelling of liquor.
Tomoyo laughed. "No! It's my friend, Sakura," she replied, and then nudged her arm.
Sakura didn't find it funny at all. It hurt her feelings. She didn't want to be known as Tomoyo's mom, when she's older than her! Yet, she did not make a rude comment to him, due to the fact it would be like fighting with a five year old.
"Oh, okay," he said, and then pulled Tomoyo close to him. He wrapped his hands around her waist and whispered something in her ear that made her laugh.
Sakura in a way felt jealous. She wanted to be the one getting whispered to and have someone want them close to her. That would mean everything in the world. However, definitely not someone like Syaoran.
"Sakura," Tomoyo said. "Ummm… can you leave us alone?"
What a feeling of not being wanted… She said to herself, and then said to her, "Oh yeah. Silly me. Good night."
Tomoyo smiled and then focused her attention on him.
Sakura went into her room, turned up her new Momusu CD, and tried to get some sleep. Maybe in the morning she'll feel better about herself.
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To Be Continued…
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