Misc. Notes: More of Subaru's thoughts. I think that's basically what the whole thing is going to be. It might seem pointless, but it'll be like this up until the point of post-Sei... basically, feelings of becoming the Sakurazukamori. Hehe, that'll be soon, I just need to get some other stuff off my mind so I can continue. Enjoy.
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But I can only think of one person. Every day.
Nothing. Nothing else. Everything... is for him. To beat him. No... to fulfill my wish.
Tell me... Is it a blessing or a curse, to think of nothing but the man you love... to be so consumed, eternally, that everything else falls away? A blessing or a curse...
Everyone has at least one wish, something they're living to fulfill. I have a couple... one. One was recently granted. By Kamui... of the Chi no Ryuu. But the other... lives unfulfilled. My... true Wish.
"Why... why do you look like Seishirou?"
"Isn't that your wish, isn't it...? To see... Seishirou again?"
The sight in my right eye... is gone.
Yes... one of my wishes was to lose my right eye... as... Seishirou had done for me. To be like him... but... my true Wish...
Kamui... of the Ten no Ryuu. A few months ago, he saw... his childhood friend, Monou Kotori, killed by her brother, his best friend. He went Within... inside his soul... just as I had. Just like that time, nine years ago... when I discovered... the truth.
Everything. Anything. Nothing.
Nothing... matters anymore.
I started going to Clamp School, in the college division. I... don't actually plan on taking classes. I'm just there to... look for him.
Kamui commented on my smoking as I attempted to tutor him... he admitted it wasn't in his place to say... but that... that smoking was still bad for me. Even if it helps my powers. Even if it might help me beat him. But...
I don't know what else I can do.
What else I can do. The only things I can... and will do... Looking for him. Thinking of him. Building my powers so, when I see him again...
Torturing myself with the thought of him...
Nothing. Nothing else I can do.
I don't care about the end of the Earth, the world, humanity.
Nothing. Nothing matters to me anymore.
I may be a Ten no Ryuu, but it couldn't matter less. Even if I was to cross over to the "other side", become a Chi no Ryuu, it would make no difference.
When I was sixteen... I used to care about everything. Even when I was sick...I would worry about others. People I barely knew, people who didn't care about me. Complete strangers, or close friends.
He changed me... but I didn't change him... I don't matter to him, just as nothing matters to me...
There is only one thing, one person I can think of every day.
Seishirou-san...