Disclaimers: Don't own them, yada, yada
Warnings: shounen ai, AU, OOC, slight Wufei torture in this chapter (but I
think we've established that he deserves it...)
Welcome Distractions
By Rapunzel
Chapter 14: Reluctant Agreements
Heero spent almost the entire next day berating himself for being a coward. He knew that he would have to face Wufei eventually; after all, he still lived with him. At the same time, he was extremely reluctant to meet his estranged roommate. He ducked into his room only when he knew Wufei was out and avoided the dorms altogether whenever he could. He spent a few nights at Duo's apartment until his dorm mates began teasing him about renting out his half of the room. Only then did he return to the dorms.
He began to wish that he could have stayed at Duo's apartment forever. While Wufei didn't go out of his way to make Heero's life miserable, his utter coldness began to wear Heero down. They never spoke, and if they were in the room together, Wufei pretended that his roommate didn't exist. Occasionally, the snubs became more blatant. Once, when Heero sat down at the same table in the dinning commons, Wufei deliberately got up and moved elsewhere.
Not for the first time, the library became a refuge for Heero. Though he and Duo were now much more careful about where they kissed, they still spent a lot of time in each other's company. Heero didn't know why Duo put up with all of his complaints and tales of tribulation, but he did.
On Friday, Heero was particularly gloomy. "I can't believe I have to spend all weekend cooped up with him," Heero said as he sat with Duo at a quiet table on the second floor. "I don't know how I'm going to survive."
"Simple," Duo said. "You don't stay there. You come over and spend the weekend with me."
"But I've already been imposing on you enough. What will your roommates say?"
"Well," Duo answered, "you can find out if you wait a little longer. We were all planning to walk home together late this afternoon, so you can ask them yourself."
Hilde and Quatre, as it turned out, said that they would be delighted to have Heero stay over for the weekend.
"You might even be able to use my bed," Quatre said. "Let me talk to Trowa." And he darted off, returning a moment later with the tall, green- eyed young man Heero vaguely remembered from the night of the fraternity party.
"Heero, this is Trowa. Trowa, Heero." Duo made the necessary introductions.
"Nice to meet you," Trowa and Heero both intoned, shaking hands. Heero was immensely grateful that Trowa didn't bring up their previous meeting; he would just as soon not remember his idiotic behavior on that night.
"Heero's going to spend the weekend with us," Quatre was saying. "We should do something special while he's over."
"Nothing too special," Trowa said. "Valentine's Day is only a week away, and I thought we were saving our special outings for then."
"Well, we should at least let Heero go get his things, and we can decide who's doing what later," Hilde interrupted.
Everyone agreed that this was a sensible course of action, and so they all headed off to the dorms. Upon arriving, Heero hung back, letting the others wander ahead of him as they talked about how nostalgic it was to be back in these buildings once again. He knew he was being stupid, but he also knew that Wufei was likely to be back from class, and he didn't want to see what the other's reaction to Duo would be. He wasn't sure if he would be able to keep his temper if Wufei did start, and if he hauled off and hit his roommate, that would pretty much put an end to any possibility that they would ever be friends again.
"Hey, Heero!" Duo's voice broke him out of his thoughts. "I think you'd better come here." Duo's voice held a note that spoke of both urgency and amusement.
Heero trailed down the hall towards where the rest of them were standing in front of his room, staring at something with astonishment and, in Hilde and Duo's cases at least, amusement. Trowa had his eyebrows raised, Quatre had averted his eyes, and his cheeks were rather pink, Hilde was gazing avidly, and Duo just looked amused. What he saw when he reached them made his jaw drop.
Wufei was standing in front of their room. He looked like he was in the middle of doing a jumping jack, his arms held open above his head, and legs spread slightly apart. Holding him in place, strapped down to the door, was more duct tape than Heero had ever seen in his life. That in and of itself was enough to cause astonishment, but it was not all. Wufei had no clothes on, and the only thing protecting his modesty was a bunch of strategically placed whipped cream. Another strip of duct tape ran across his mouth, preventing him from calling for help.
"Oh my..." Heero was at a loss for words. Hilde on the other hand, was not.
"HAHAHAHA!!!!! Oh, this is priceless!"
Wufei sent a glare in her direction, but was unable to comment due to the duct tape.
"Would you like us to get rid of the tape?" Duo asked sweetly.
Wufei nodded as emphatically as he could.
Duo reached out and took hold of the piece of tape covering Wufei's mouth. With a swift tug, he pulled it free.
"OW!" Wufei yelled as his mouth was abruptly uncovered.
Duo smirked. "Sorry," he said, not sounding very sorry at all.
"What happened to you?" Heero asked.
"What do you think happened?!" Wufei spat. "Dorothy happened to me, that's what! I knew she was being too quiet; she was just waiting for the RA on our floor to leave town this weekend!"
"I could go get the other RA if you want to make a complaint," Trowa offered calmly. "There are always at least two per building."
"NO!" Wufei looked horrified at the very idea. "The RA on the third floor is female!"
"All the better," Hilde muttered. "I think she would appreciate this."
"What are you doing just standing there?!" Wufei demanded. "Help me down!"
Heero sighed in resignation and reached for the tape, but Duo caught his hand, arresting the movement.
"What are you doing?!" Wufei snapped. "Hurry up; the whipped cream is starting to go runny!"
Duo's smirk only grew. "Oh, I don't know," he said. "I think I like having you right there."
"What?!"
"Well," Duo said, shrugging, "you seem so determined to make all homosexuals out to be perverts, so I might as well try to live up to your expectations."
"I never...!"
"Oh no?" Duo sounded disbelieving. " 'I didn't know that friendship extended to sticking your tongue down someone else's throat. If that's your definition of friendship, I would just as soon not be friends with you,' " he quoted mercilessly.
"I didn't mean it like that!" Wufei cried.
"Really. Then why have you been being so nasty to Heero lately?"
Wufei shut his mouth and looked slightly guilty.
"You know," Duo continued, "someone once told me that one definition for a homophobe was someone who was insecure about their own sexuality."
Wufei's face went crimson. "I am not!" he snapped.
"Then why do you feel threatened?" Duo asked.
Wufei didn't answer.
"Good God!" Duo exploded. "Heero is not interested in you that way! For goodness sakes, you're standing there, more than half naked, surrounded by four homosexual men, and the only one who's drooling at you happens to be female!"
"Hey!" Hilde cried. "I am not drooling! I'm just being appreciative!"
"Well, that's one way of putting it," Trowa muttered.
"Are you going to let me down yet?" Wufei asked, shooting a nervous glance at Hilde.
Duo crossed his arms over his chest. "Not until you agree to be civil to Heero," he said.
Wufei scowled.
"I didn't say that you two had to become bosom pals or anything," Duo snapped, sounding irritated, "but he is your roommate, and you should at least be polite to each other. You're going to have to live together for several more months yet."
Wufei met Heero's eyes rather grudgingly. "Civil," he said. "Fine. I can manage that."
"Heero?" Duo turned to him. "Does that sound good to you?"
Heero nodded.
"All right, then," Duo said, and he set about trying to detach the tape from the door. After a moment, Heero moved to join him. Wufei closed his eyes and didn't look entirely happy to have them so close, but he said nothing.
Hilde, on the other hand, had plenty to say. "Just one Polaroid. Please? Just one. Or a digital camera would work."
"Woman!" Wufei cried, looking horrified. "Don't even think about it!"
The whipped cream was showing definite signs of running by the time they managed to get Wufei loose. After hastily muttering his thanks, he vanished inside his room and slammed the door.
Once the door was safely closed, Duo burst out laughing. "Oh, man, that was classic! You know, if this Dorothy chick could pull that off, I don't think he's ever going to beat her."
"That won't stop him from dying in the attempt," Heero muttered darkly.
"True," Duo conceded. "But if it ever gets too bad, you can still stay over at our place. Speaking of which, do you still want to stay this weekend?"
Heero considered for a moment, then shook his head. "I think I'll stay here and see if your little talk had any effect on him."
"Fair enough," Duo said.
Just then, there was the sound of hurried footsteps on the stairs, and two girls came running from the landing down the hall. "Is it over? Did we miss it?" one asked rather breathlessly.
Heero eyed them cautiously. "You're from the second floor, aren't you? What are you doing down here?"
"Well," the other girl began, "Dorothy told us that if we came down here, we would get to see a hot guy shirtless. She took pictures, you see, but they haven't been developed yet."
"She took pictures?" Hilde perked up. "Oh good. At least someone did."
"Women!" Wufei shouted through the door. "I can hear you!"
"We're too late, aren't we?" the first girl said gloomily.
"'Fraid so, ladies," Duo said. "Better luck next time."
"Oh well," the other said, as they turned around and began to walk back towards the stairs. "I guess we'll just have to wait for the pictures to be developed."
"You'll do no such thing!" Wufei howled from inside his room.
Duo laughed. "What do you guys want to bet he'll try to find that film and destroy it?"
Trowa shook his head. "I never bet against certainties. Now, if you'd asked me to bet on whether or not he'll succeed, then you might have something."
Laughing, they all headed down the hall, leaving Heero to deal with his slightly repentant but still irate roommate.
tbc
AN: Thank you to PlaidDragon for giving me the idea of how to punish Wufei adequately, and to M.E. for suggesting the whipped cream.
Welcome Distractions
By Rapunzel
Chapter 14: Reluctant Agreements
Heero spent almost the entire next day berating himself for being a coward. He knew that he would have to face Wufei eventually; after all, he still lived with him. At the same time, he was extremely reluctant to meet his estranged roommate. He ducked into his room only when he knew Wufei was out and avoided the dorms altogether whenever he could. He spent a few nights at Duo's apartment until his dorm mates began teasing him about renting out his half of the room. Only then did he return to the dorms.
He began to wish that he could have stayed at Duo's apartment forever. While Wufei didn't go out of his way to make Heero's life miserable, his utter coldness began to wear Heero down. They never spoke, and if they were in the room together, Wufei pretended that his roommate didn't exist. Occasionally, the snubs became more blatant. Once, when Heero sat down at the same table in the dinning commons, Wufei deliberately got up and moved elsewhere.
Not for the first time, the library became a refuge for Heero. Though he and Duo were now much more careful about where they kissed, they still spent a lot of time in each other's company. Heero didn't know why Duo put up with all of his complaints and tales of tribulation, but he did.
On Friday, Heero was particularly gloomy. "I can't believe I have to spend all weekend cooped up with him," Heero said as he sat with Duo at a quiet table on the second floor. "I don't know how I'm going to survive."
"Simple," Duo said. "You don't stay there. You come over and spend the weekend with me."
"But I've already been imposing on you enough. What will your roommates say?"
"Well," Duo answered, "you can find out if you wait a little longer. We were all planning to walk home together late this afternoon, so you can ask them yourself."
Hilde and Quatre, as it turned out, said that they would be delighted to have Heero stay over for the weekend.
"You might even be able to use my bed," Quatre said. "Let me talk to Trowa." And he darted off, returning a moment later with the tall, green- eyed young man Heero vaguely remembered from the night of the fraternity party.
"Heero, this is Trowa. Trowa, Heero." Duo made the necessary introductions.
"Nice to meet you," Trowa and Heero both intoned, shaking hands. Heero was immensely grateful that Trowa didn't bring up their previous meeting; he would just as soon not remember his idiotic behavior on that night.
"Heero's going to spend the weekend with us," Quatre was saying. "We should do something special while he's over."
"Nothing too special," Trowa said. "Valentine's Day is only a week away, and I thought we were saving our special outings for then."
"Well, we should at least let Heero go get his things, and we can decide who's doing what later," Hilde interrupted.
Everyone agreed that this was a sensible course of action, and so they all headed off to the dorms. Upon arriving, Heero hung back, letting the others wander ahead of him as they talked about how nostalgic it was to be back in these buildings once again. He knew he was being stupid, but he also knew that Wufei was likely to be back from class, and he didn't want to see what the other's reaction to Duo would be. He wasn't sure if he would be able to keep his temper if Wufei did start, and if he hauled off and hit his roommate, that would pretty much put an end to any possibility that they would ever be friends again.
"Hey, Heero!" Duo's voice broke him out of his thoughts. "I think you'd better come here." Duo's voice held a note that spoke of both urgency and amusement.
Heero trailed down the hall towards where the rest of them were standing in front of his room, staring at something with astonishment and, in Hilde and Duo's cases at least, amusement. Trowa had his eyebrows raised, Quatre had averted his eyes, and his cheeks were rather pink, Hilde was gazing avidly, and Duo just looked amused. What he saw when he reached them made his jaw drop.
Wufei was standing in front of their room. He looked like he was in the middle of doing a jumping jack, his arms held open above his head, and legs spread slightly apart. Holding him in place, strapped down to the door, was more duct tape than Heero had ever seen in his life. That in and of itself was enough to cause astonishment, but it was not all. Wufei had no clothes on, and the only thing protecting his modesty was a bunch of strategically placed whipped cream. Another strip of duct tape ran across his mouth, preventing him from calling for help.
"Oh my..." Heero was at a loss for words. Hilde on the other hand, was not.
"HAHAHAHA!!!!! Oh, this is priceless!"
Wufei sent a glare in her direction, but was unable to comment due to the duct tape.
"Would you like us to get rid of the tape?" Duo asked sweetly.
Wufei nodded as emphatically as he could.
Duo reached out and took hold of the piece of tape covering Wufei's mouth. With a swift tug, he pulled it free.
"OW!" Wufei yelled as his mouth was abruptly uncovered.
Duo smirked. "Sorry," he said, not sounding very sorry at all.
"What happened to you?" Heero asked.
"What do you think happened?!" Wufei spat. "Dorothy happened to me, that's what! I knew she was being too quiet; she was just waiting for the RA on our floor to leave town this weekend!"
"I could go get the other RA if you want to make a complaint," Trowa offered calmly. "There are always at least two per building."
"NO!" Wufei looked horrified at the very idea. "The RA on the third floor is female!"
"All the better," Hilde muttered. "I think she would appreciate this."
"What are you doing just standing there?!" Wufei demanded. "Help me down!"
Heero sighed in resignation and reached for the tape, but Duo caught his hand, arresting the movement.
"What are you doing?!" Wufei snapped. "Hurry up; the whipped cream is starting to go runny!"
Duo's smirk only grew. "Oh, I don't know," he said. "I think I like having you right there."
"What?!"
"Well," Duo said, shrugging, "you seem so determined to make all homosexuals out to be perverts, so I might as well try to live up to your expectations."
"I never...!"
"Oh no?" Duo sounded disbelieving. " 'I didn't know that friendship extended to sticking your tongue down someone else's throat. If that's your definition of friendship, I would just as soon not be friends with you,' " he quoted mercilessly.
"I didn't mean it like that!" Wufei cried.
"Really. Then why have you been being so nasty to Heero lately?"
Wufei shut his mouth and looked slightly guilty.
"You know," Duo continued, "someone once told me that one definition for a homophobe was someone who was insecure about their own sexuality."
Wufei's face went crimson. "I am not!" he snapped.
"Then why do you feel threatened?" Duo asked.
Wufei didn't answer.
"Good God!" Duo exploded. "Heero is not interested in you that way! For goodness sakes, you're standing there, more than half naked, surrounded by four homosexual men, and the only one who's drooling at you happens to be female!"
"Hey!" Hilde cried. "I am not drooling! I'm just being appreciative!"
"Well, that's one way of putting it," Trowa muttered.
"Are you going to let me down yet?" Wufei asked, shooting a nervous glance at Hilde.
Duo crossed his arms over his chest. "Not until you agree to be civil to Heero," he said.
Wufei scowled.
"I didn't say that you two had to become bosom pals or anything," Duo snapped, sounding irritated, "but he is your roommate, and you should at least be polite to each other. You're going to have to live together for several more months yet."
Wufei met Heero's eyes rather grudgingly. "Civil," he said. "Fine. I can manage that."
"Heero?" Duo turned to him. "Does that sound good to you?"
Heero nodded.
"All right, then," Duo said, and he set about trying to detach the tape from the door. After a moment, Heero moved to join him. Wufei closed his eyes and didn't look entirely happy to have them so close, but he said nothing.
Hilde, on the other hand, had plenty to say. "Just one Polaroid. Please? Just one. Or a digital camera would work."
"Woman!" Wufei cried, looking horrified. "Don't even think about it!"
The whipped cream was showing definite signs of running by the time they managed to get Wufei loose. After hastily muttering his thanks, he vanished inside his room and slammed the door.
Once the door was safely closed, Duo burst out laughing. "Oh, man, that was classic! You know, if this Dorothy chick could pull that off, I don't think he's ever going to beat her."
"That won't stop him from dying in the attempt," Heero muttered darkly.
"True," Duo conceded. "But if it ever gets too bad, you can still stay over at our place. Speaking of which, do you still want to stay this weekend?"
Heero considered for a moment, then shook his head. "I think I'll stay here and see if your little talk had any effect on him."
"Fair enough," Duo said.
Just then, there was the sound of hurried footsteps on the stairs, and two girls came running from the landing down the hall. "Is it over? Did we miss it?" one asked rather breathlessly.
Heero eyed them cautiously. "You're from the second floor, aren't you? What are you doing down here?"
"Well," the other girl began, "Dorothy told us that if we came down here, we would get to see a hot guy shirtless. She took pictures, you see, but they haven't been developed yet."
"She took pictures?" Hilde perked up. "Oh good. At least someone did."
"Women!" Wufei shouted through the door. "I can hear you!"
"We're too late, aren't we?" the first girl said gloomily.
"'Fraid so, ladies," Duo said. "Better luck next time."
"Oh well," the other said, as they turned around and began to walk back towards the stairs. "I guess we'll just have to wait for the pictures to be developed."
"You'll do no such thing!" Wufei howled from inside his room.
Duo laughed. "What do you guys want to bet he'll try to find that film and destroy it?"
Trowa shook his head. "I never bet against certainties. Now, if you'd asked me to bet on whether or not he'll succeed, then you might have something."
Laughing, they all headed down the hall, leaving Heero to deal with his slightly repentant but still irate roommate.
tbc
AN: Thank you to PlaidDragon for giving me the idea of how to punish Wufei adequately, and to M.E. for suggesting the whipped cream.