KIWI'S NOTES: Uhm... oops? *forgot to continue updating* Oh, and people, please stop reporting L-chan's fics for things they haven't done. She now has no fics at all that haven't been deleted at least once.
YGO is © to Kazuki Takahashi.
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STRESS REMEDY
By Logo
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Now, this girl gets to her point fast. We have a quick discussion regarding online furry art. I mention that my favourite artist is Ryou Bakura. Are you surprised? Considering he and Yugi are the only two furry artists I know of... well, at least I didn't make it sound like I knew him personally. That would ruin the fun.
"I'm feeling really depressed right now."
Mmm... I think Ryou said she was always acting depressed. I ask her why.
Oh wow, her long-time boyfriend's just cruelly ditched her for no real reason. She tells me it's Soda. Yes, that's Ryou's net alias.
I've already decided that the girl's more of an idiot than I originally thought.
I now know her name. Or at least her surname. Llewellyn. Think there's enough 'L's in there? She's still stalker-girl to me.
She's already asked me if I'm single. I told her I was single and looking. And I am. Single and looking at the image of aroused Ryou in my greatest fantasies. Handcuffed to a bed. In a very suggestive position. Wearing a skirt. With no underwear. I wish it wasn't a fantasy. I wonder how Ryou would react to it?
A little box pops up in the corner of the screen. Unsolvable has just signed in. I recognise that screen-name. What's Yugi doing? I thought he was going out.
Just as I'm about to ask him what he's doing, he asks me that same question. I inform him that he really doesn't want to know. Hah, he's been talking to Ryou, I know it. How do I know? He thinks I'm having cybersex. I wouldn't mind the real thing right now. As long as it was Ryou. Or Marik. Ooh, threesome. Insert new erotic fantasy here. And yes, Ryou's still handcuffed to the bed and wearing a skirt.
It appears that Joey hadn't turned up at Yugi's yet so they were waiting. I decided to ask Yugi if he had fun with Yami. And also take the chance to ask him if he ever intended to be submissive for once. Yami steals the keyboard. He's as bad at typing as me. It took three attempts to read it before I understood what he was saying. We both need translators. Oh well, at least I'VE managed to master the function of the shift key.
"wht teh hell r u tlking about/"
Oh, has Yugi been lying?
Considering the fact that Yami proceeds to inform me that they'd never fucked, I doubt it. I didn't know Yami could get embarrassed and defensive over something as simple as that. I see a window of opportunity opening just for me.
Stalker-girl asks me if I wear a thong.
Why do I have the sudden urge to repeatedly bang my head on the desk? I respond with a 'maybe' and a winking smily face. Hey, I'm trying to deceive her here! And in case you're wondering, I don't wear any underwear. Least of all a thong.
In my strange erotic fantasy, Marik is now completely naked with the exception of a thong. Why doesn't Ryou have the thong? Because it wouldn't look... right. Technically, neither does the skirt, but...
The windows don't blink at me for a while. Uh... I mean the windows on the computer, you know, they blink when you get a new message... I entertain myself by wondering how many guys could fuck each other at once. And how a chihuahua could kill an alsatian.
Ryou asks me strange questions like that. I usually get AN answer... eventually. I need to come up with one of those. In a fight between a chihuahua and an alsatian, the chihuahua wins. How?
Does flame-retardant mean a retard on fire or an object that can't catch fire? How do you catch fire? Doesn't it burn your hands?
Hey, I know! The chihuahua could kill the alsatian by getting stuck in its throat! I check if Yugi's still on. He is. I tell him to relay the answer to Ryou.
Oh, surprise surprise, Ryou's the one at the computer. He wants to know what I'm doing. I tell him he'll find out soon enough, and spin in the chair. Lucky does not like it. His little hooks are digging into my leg. Ow?
Stalker-girl is amusing. She's saying stuff like 'he's only ditching me so he can go out with this other girl' and that his claims are over exaggerated. Considering she was hitting on one of Ryou's best friends, in addition to several other people Ryou knows online, I doubt that's true. I resist the urge to tell her so. This girl has a problem. She won't admit it.
Instead of biting her head off (which I really, REALLY wanted to do), I pretend to pity her and sympathise with her.
I ask Ryou to link me to stalker-girl's LJ. He wants to know why... I wonder if he's suspicious? I refuse to tell him but I get my hands on it anyway. Clicky clicky.
OH. MY. RA.
Reading over all this crap makes me want to find something to destroy. Other than the cat, because I love the poor creature (even if he does occasionally deposit enormous, dead rats at my feet and expect me to eat it for breakfast). I wish we had fish or a rodent or something. We don't have a rabbit. Ryou says they're vicious and evil. Does that make ME a rabbit? Yay, I'm a cute little bunny! Oh fuck it.
That sounded wrong. Do I care? No.
Yugi and company leave on their 'magical mystical quest' for paninis. Yes, Joey finally showed. I'm left alone with stalker-girl. Now I can focus on my revenge.
This girl's behaviour is laughable. She's telling me that she's had so many people who've 'trodden' on her, people that she 'thought were her friends'. She's acting completely stupid over the whole thing! Must resist urge to tell her it's her fault anyway, or plan will be ruined.
She's already hitting on me. Aww, how sweet, she's going on about how she likes me. This is the first time I've spoken to her. I must be doing a really good job at pretending to be nice.
And now she's trying to gain my sympathy. Again. My eye twitches. I haven't noticed it twitching for quite a while. I thought my twitch had gone.
Something people really should know: I am the most unsympathetic person on this planet. Unless you happen to be either Ryou or a cat, you can not honestly expect me to sympathise with you.
Now, remember, this is the girl who posted a conversation with her mother in her journal in defence of Ryou telling her to fuck off.
Don't you think it's rather strange that now I'm being told that her mother used and abused her, beat her, crushed her, physically and emotionally damaged her? That her mother is evil, and although they get on 'okay' now, she still hates her?
That sounds beyond odd, in my honest opinion.
She also tells me something I know she told Ryou about two months ago. That she just this morning found out that her friend was dying. Apparently, she told Yugi that as well, last week. I wonder if I should mention Yugi? No, that would blow my cover.
She must go through a lot of dying friends. It's a surprise she has any left.
More eye-twitchiness. This time, it's my other eye that's going. My left one. Well, at least it's a change.
Lucky moves. He's on his back, in between my legs, his head hanging off the edge of the seat. Ryou has repeatedly informed me that this animal is stupid. In this position, he certainly looks that. I don't think cats are supposed to lie like that. And in this particular position, it certainly makes one of us look like a sick and twisted pervert. I blame the cat. He put himself there.
Both of my eyes twitch simultaneously. I'm feeling kind of tired.
I consider signing off and going back to the Ring. I don't really want to go back into my Millennium Ring though. I inform stalker-girl that I'm leaving, switch my status to 'away', and save a copy of the conversation. I then decide to get some rest on the sofa.
I think I must have fallen asleep, because I awake to find Lucky curled up on my lap and Ryou waving a tiny tub of ice cream and a spoon under my nose. He's still wearing his coat.
"Hey, Bakura! Earth to Bakura! Dude, we got yeh some ice cream," Joey informs me. Really? And there was me thinking Ryou was waving it in front of my face because it was for Yugi...
It looks like we've got company. Much to my relief, we're missing Tristan and Tea. Unfortunately, we're also missing Marik.
My right eye is twitching AGAIN! I vow to one day find a cure for this evil twitch. Well, I'll force someone else to do it for me at knife-point, but you get the idea. I take the ice cream, and the spoon.
"Nnks," I mumble. I have this problem - I can't speak properly when I've just woken up. It's almost as annoying as MY RA-DAMNED TWITCHY EYE!
"So, what exactly were you up to on the net then?" Yugi asks. I grin. I can't help it. Everyone looks nervous.
Am I THAT scary when I grin?
"I think it might be better if you didn't tell us, Tomb Robber," the Pharaoh says. I do NOT like his tone. "The sick and twisted things that go through your head wouldn't exactly be appropriate for certain minds here."
"Come on, we know Yugi's not that innocent," I respond. I couldn't help it. "You just don't want everyone to know that Yugi fucked you. Several times." The expression on Yami's face is absolutely priceless. I don't think I've seen ANYONE go that red.
"I don't know where you get those ideas from!" Yami yells. He doesn't realise that everyone else here knows anyway, thanks to Yugi's LiveJournal. I can hear Ryou snickering.
"I have my sources," I inform him. "Right Yugi?" Wow, I didn't know that boy had mastered an evil smirk. It seems I now have a rival in that department.
Yami's staring at Yugi in shock. Yugi smirks. Yugi... is... smirking. I thought angry Ryou was disturbing. This is even more so. I think I'll just eat my ice cream now.
"By the way, you got the answer right," Ryou tells me. "The chihuahua DOES get stuck in the alsatian's throat."
END OF PART 2
Coming up... (in part 3, that is)
Bakura carries out the next stage of his plan. Stalker-girl undergoes an identity crisis. Bakura realises that his job is going to be a lot harder than he thought. HAS THIS GIRL NO CONSCIENCE?!
YGO is © to Kazuki Takahashi.
-------------
STRESS REMEDY
By Logo
-------------
Now, this girl gets to her point fast. We have a quick discussion regarding online furry art. I mention that my favourite artist is Ryou Bakura. Are you surprised? Considering he and Yugi are the only two furry artists I know of... well, at least I didn't make it sound like I knew him personally. That would ruin the fun.
"I'm feeling really depressed right now."
Mmm... I think Ryou said she was always acting depressed. I ask her why.
Oh wow, her long-time boyfriend's just cruelly ditched her for no real reason. She tells me it's Soda. Yes, that's Ryou's net alias.
I've already decided that the girl's more of an idiot than I originally thought.
I now know her name. Or at least her surname. Llewellyn. Think there's enough 'L's in there? She's still stalker-girl to me.
She's already asked me if I'm single. I told her I was single and looking. And I am. Single and looking at the image of aroused Ryou in my greatest fantasies. Handcuffed to a bed. In a very suggestive position. Wearing a skirt. With no underwear. I wish it wasn't a fantasy. I wonder how Ryou would react to it?
A little box pops up in the corner of the screen. Unsolvable has just signed in. I recognise that screen-name. What's Yugi doing? I thought he was going out.
Just as I'm about to ask him what he's doing, he asks me that same question. I inform him that he really doesn't want to know. Hah, he's been talking to Ryou, I know it. How do I know? He thinks I'm having cybersex. I wouldn't mind the real thing right now. As long as it was Ryou. Or Marik. Ooh, threesome. Insert new erotic fantasy here. And yes, Ryou's still handcuffed to the bed and wearing a skirt.
It appears that Joey hadn't turned up at Yugi's yet so they were waiting. I decided to ask Yugi if he had fun with Yami. And also take the chance to ask him if he ever intended to be submissive for once. Yami steals the keyboard. He's as bad at typing as me. It took three attempts to read it before I understood what he was saying. We both need translators. Oh well, at least I'VE managed to master the function of the shift key.
"wht teh hell r u tlking about/"
Oh, has Yugi been lying?
Considering the fact that Yami proceeds to inform me that they'd never fucked, I doubt it. I didn't know Yami could get embarrassed and defensive over something as simple as that. I see a window of opportunity opening just for me.
Stalker-girl asks me if I wear a thong.
Why do I have the sudden urge to repeatedly bang my head on the desk? I respond with a 'maybe' and a winking smily face. Hey, I'm trying to deceive her here! And in case you're wondering, I don't wear any underwear. Least of all a thong.
In my strange erotic fantasy, Marik is now completely naked with the exception of a thong. Why doesn't Ryou have the thong? Because it wouldn't look... right. Technically, neither does the skirt, but...
The windows don't blink at me for a while. Uh... I mean the windows on the computer, you know, they blink when you get a new message... I entertain myself by wondering how many guys could fuck each other at once. And how a chihuahua could kill an alsatian.
Ryou asks me strange questions like that. I usually get AN answer... eventually. I need to come up with one of those. In a fight between a chihuahua and an alsatian, the chihuahua wins. How?
Does flame-retardant mean a retard on fire or an object that can't catch fire? How do you catch fire? Doesn't it burn your hands?
Hey, I know! The chihuahua could kill the alsatian by getting stuck in its throat! I check if Yugi's still on. He is. I tell him to relay the answer to Ryou.
Oh, surprise surprise, Ryou's the one at the computer. He wants to know what I'm doing. I tell him he'll find out soon enough, and spin in the chair. Lucky does not like it. His little hooks are digging into my leg. Ow?
Stalker-girl is amusing. She's saying stuff like 'he's only ditching me so he can go out with this other girl' and that his claims are over exaggerated. Considering she was hitting on one of Ryou's best friends, in addition to several other people Ryou knows online, I doubt that's true. I resist the urge to tell her so. This girl has a problem. She won't admit it.
Instead of biting her head off (which I really, REALLY wanted to do), I pretend to pity her and sympathise with her.
I ask Ryou to link me to stalker-girl's LJ. He wants to know why... I wonder if he's suspicious? I refuse to tell him but I get my hands on it anyway. Clicky clicky.
OH. MY. RA.
Reading over all this crap makes me want to find something to destroy. Other than the cat, because I love the poor creature (even if he does occasionally deposit enormous, dead rats at my feet and expect me to eat it for breakfast). I wish we had fish or a rodent or something. We don't have a rabbit. Ryou says they're vicious and evil. Does that make ME a rabbit? Yay, I'm a cute little bunny! Oh fuck it.
That sounded wrong. Do I care? No.
Yugi and company leave on their 'magical mystical quest' for paninis. Yes, Joey finally showed. I'm left alone with stalker-girl. Now I can focus on my revenge.
This girl's behaviour is laughable. She's telling me that she's had so many people who've 'trodden' on her, people that she 'thought were her friends'. She's acting completely stupid over the whole thing! Must resist urge to tell her it's her fault anyway, or plan will be ruined.
She's already hitting on me. Aww, how sweet, she's going on about how she likes me. This is the first time I've spoken to her. I must be doing a really good job at pretending to be nice.
And now she's trying to gain my sympathy. Again. My eye twitches. I haven't noticed it twitching for quite a while. I thought my twitch had gone.
Something people really should know: I am the most unsympathetic person on this planet. Unless you happen to be either Ryou or a cat, you can not honestly expect me to sympathise with you.
Now, remember, this is the girl who posted a conversation with her mother in her journal in defence of Ryou telling her to fuck off.
Don't you think it's rather strange that now I'm being told that her mother used and abused her, beat her, crushed her, physically and emotionally damaged her? That her mother is evil, and although they get on 'okay' now, she still hates her?
That sounds beyond odd, in my honest opinion.
She also tells me something I know she told Ryou about two months ago. That she just this morning found out that her friend was dying. Apparently, she told Yugi that as well, last week. I wonder if I should mention Yugi? No, that would blow my cover.
She must go through a lot of dying friends. It's a surprise she has any left.
More eye-twitchiness. This time, it's my other eye that's going. My left one. Well, at least it's a change.
Lucky moves. He's on his back, in between my legs, his head hanging off the edge of the seat. Ryou has repeatedly informed me that this animal is stupid. In this position, he certainly looks that. I don't think cats are supposed to lie like that. And in this particular position, it certainly makes one of us look like a sick and twisted pervert. I blame the cat. He put himself there.
Both of my eyes twitch simultaneously. I'm feeling kind of tired.
I consider signing off and going back to the Ring. I don't really want to go back into my Millennium Ring though. I inform stalker-girl that I'm leaving, switch my status to 'away', and save a copy of the conversation. I then decide to get some rest on the sofa.
I think I must have fallen asleep, because I awake to find Lucky curled up on my lap and Ryou waving a tiny tub of ice cream and a spoon under my nose. He's still wearing his coat.
"Hey, Bakura! Earth to Bakura! Dude, we got yeh some ice cream," Joey informs me. Really? And there was me thinking Ryou was waving it in front of my face because it was for Yugi...
It looks like we've got company. Much to my relief, we're missing Tristan and Tea. Unfortunately, we're also missing Marik.
My right eye is twitching AGAIN! I vow to one day find a cure for this evil twitch. Well, I'll force someone else to do it for me at knife-point, but you get the idea. I take the ice cream, and the spoon.
"Nnks," I mumble. I have this problem - I can't speak properly when I've just woken up. It's almost as annoying as MY RA-DAMNED TWITCHY EYE!
"So, what exactly were you up to on the net then?" Yugi asks. I grin. I can't help it. Everyone looks nervous.
Am I THAT scary when I grin?
"I think it might be better if you didn't tell us, Tomb Robber," the Pharaoh says. I do NOT like his tone. "The sick and twisted things that go through your head wouldn't exactly be appropriate for certain minds here."
"Come on, we know Yugi's not that innocent," I respond. I couldn't help it. "You just don't want everyone to know that Yugi fucked you. Several times." The expression on Yami's face is absolutely priceless. I don't think I've seen ANYONE go that red.
"I don't know where you get those ideas from!" Yami yells. He doesn't realise that everyone else here knows anyway, thanks to Yugi's LiveJournal. I can hear Ryou snickering.
"I have my sources," I inform him. "Right Yugi?" Wow, I didn't know that boy had mastered an evil smirk. It seems I now have a rival in that department.
Yami's staring at Yugi in shock. Yugi smirks. Yugi... is... smirking. I thought angry Ryou was disturbing. This is even more so. I think I'll just eat my ice cream now.
"By the way, you got the answer right," Ryou tells me. "The chihuahua DOES get stuck in the alsatian's throat."
END OF PART 2
Coming up... (in part 3, that is)
Bakura carries out the next stage of his plan. Stalker-girl undergoes an identity crisis. Bakura realises that his job is going to be a lot harder than he thought. HAS THIS GIRL NO CONSCIENCE?!