"And you are now officially banned from having a career in military technology for the rest of your life! I definitely don't need to say why." He hurls the model in the trash.
"Now we have to redesign it all over again, all because of YOU! Pack your bags and never come back here again! Nitwit."
He closes the door and waits for Lard Nar in the hallway. In the room, Lard Nar jumps off the bunk bed, pulls out his small blue suitcase, and packs his very few valuables into it.
"*sigh* Well, it's gotten a lot worse now, I don't have a job anymore and I'll probably have to live in a hobo's shack for the rest of my life, and I still hadn't committed suicide yet. Is something wrong with me? Is there still hope that good luck will surpass in me? Do I have to continue my research on Operation Impending Doom before I die?
"I just.....have this feeling that there is still something, something out there for me to achieve. Something big, important, can change history, can change lives, something involving monkeys of some sort...."
"Come on, Lard Nar! Let's move it already!" The Commander shouts outside his door. A crowd of Vortians with plastic faces and casts are behind him
"Nothing to see people, NOTHING TO SEE HERE!!! Well, actually...I guess somebody could videotape this glorious moment when that little nitwit finally leaves us alone.....FOR ONCE!! WOOO!!!"
Lard Nar walks down the hallway into an elevator. The crowd is in there with and keep following him from floor to floor, until he stands front of the door to exit the building, his job and his old, paranoid researching self, he'll.
"Okay....here it comes....the moment of truth......" Whispers the anxious 296.
The commander kicks Lard Nar out of the building with his heavy, lead and steel boot that could have you aching in pain for weeks.
Everyone shouts and cheers. "And stay out! NITWIT!!!!!"
Lard Nar lands in a garbage can that apparently, has it's metal blades out to liquefy and clean out all the garbage that's in it. It's not long before Lard Nar manages to crawl out of t with dark green blood bleeding all over his forehead.
"UGGGH....Good thing I brought medication." He takes out from the suitcase a tube of 'skin healer cream' and poured the gray stuff all over his head, and instantly the cuts and the bleeding were invisible.
"Where the hell am I going to live? On Poor Shackyton street? I guess so........*sigh*.
"I knew my life was bad because of my beliefs, but I never knew I would be from a collage graduate scientist, tester, researcher and designer in military technology into living in a home made out of board of plastic and an old mattress the next day! If only I knew what my goal in life was...."
A Vortian female walks by and throws an empty can right at Lard Nar's head. "OW!What was that for?!?!"
"For believing we're all part of the Irkens' plan to destroy the Universe!! You are a cruel Vortian to say such a thing!! I hate you!!" And she walks away from him, not even looking back.
"Well, go then ! You'll believe me one day!! You WILL!"
Lard Nar rubs his forehead where the can hit him. He looked down at the can. It landed right on its bottom and standing still, not a single dent on it. An Irken symbol was on the side of the can. Lard Nar growls at the symbol, but then enlightens himself.....And laughs.
"I know what to do! Now I know the true reason why I exist and why I didn't kill myself before!! I've got to come up with a plan and lead my own army that will defeat the superior Irken Empire and save the Universe from galactic conquest!!!! HAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!"
"Attention! Lard Na--"
Lard Nar prays for it, he's really hopeful and jolly now....
"-rrokky can sit on The Couch now. Thank You!" Buzz.
"....And in addiction, I'm gonna lay myself on that damn couch! HAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!I swear by this very can, the Irken Empire will be crushed!!!!!"
By the shouting of the word 'Crushed!', he raises one leg high up in the air, and stomps the can down with the leg only once, making the can as thin as paper.
~ IN LARD NAR'S SHACK, 9 MONTHS LATER ~
As he expected , he was living in a shack in Poor Shackyton street, researching on his computer and watching Irk through his spy cameras and was preparing himself more as each day went by. He didn't look any different other than his torn clothes, and was lucky enough to clean himself twice a week. He was watching a meeting, not letting one single eye blink from the screen inches away from his face. On it was Almighty Tallest Spork and several Irkens.
"They have a new Tallest?!?! After over 270 days they finally found out who's the tallest? HA! As if that was new! So slow in choosing, they are!!"
~ MEETING IN CONVENTIA,8 AM~
"Okay, I'm now Tallest, what do I get to do? Sit in a comfy chair in our golden palace and taunt others who are shorter than me? Even by one millimeter?" He stares at one of his advisors eye to eye.
"Yes, basically, but you have to understand that Miyuki was planning to have 75% of Irk's population. To go to Planet Devastus so they can be trained to become invaders and soldiers for our armada ;as part of her project: Operation Impending Doom."
"Operation Impending Doom? Oh yeah! That thing no other species is to know about! I get-cha! Sooo.....what do I have to do?"
"Your first act as Almighty Tallest is to open the Irken Invader Academy that we paid OVER 20,000 MONIES for."
Another Advisor steps up to Spork. "And not to mention introduce yourself on TV! That will warm you up for even more glory, royalty, and FAME!"
"But for the sake of the Control Brains, don't let this 'ZIM' guy get in the way. Finish Miyuki's project. Oh, that horrible unfortunate accident......"
"Okay! Okay! Enough commands!" The eager new Tallest shouted. "Now do I have the right to boss you around?"
"Until an Irken has grown taller than you or until you die, yes, my Tallest."
"Excellent! Off to Devastus, then! And bring me a gallon of cheese dip for my chips!!"
~LARD NAR'S SHACK~
Lard Nar flies off his chair and runs off to pack his things, talking to himself at the same time. "Devastus?? Now?!!? The time for gathering my army!
"But I'll need a ship, and willing members to join me and attack the invaders before Spork makes his speech! And it should take them....*looks at a clock*.....At least 5 hours?!? AHHH!!!!! I gotta get going! Pack my things..."
He puts all his stuff (except the TVs) in his suitcase in less than 30 seconds. "The ship! Where am I going to find a ship when all the ones above ground have been eaten?......." He thinks about this for a moment. But it does not take long for a Vortian to light the bulb.
".......That's it! That Engineer I worked with once....He told me he built 2 extra Vortian ships for himself in the Underground levels in case of emergencies....I must contact him!"
Lard Nar types rapidly onto his laptop the engineer's distant communication code for his office and almost instantly, a pink skinned Vortian's face appears on the screen.
"Hey! It's you? How's it going? Gone completely insane yet?"
Growling again, "No, but ten years ago we were working together in engineering and you told me you have vessels parked in one of the underground levels?"
"What?......Oh yeeeeeah! Those things! They're on level 7 in my garage, #24a, and the password is----"
"So can I please use one of them? It's an emergency that you wouldn't understand....Yet."
"Uh...Yeah! Sure! Go right ahead! I'm a generous guy, you know?"
"Thanks, I better be going now..."
"Wait! Before you go....well, I've been thinking about your theories for a couple of days and ...sorry about the pie. I knew it was your favorite, so that's why I threw that kind at you...."
Lard Nar was already running towards the local outdoor elevator next to his old work building before he could hear his apology. But the engineer mumbled it anyway, since it was pitiful to one's soul if he apologizes to someone whom many people hate (well, at least that was what the popular Vortians would say often during lunch break).
Lard Nar went into the elevator and it stop at the Main level of the underground part of the building, and try to find the stairs or another, more functioning elevator as fast as he could.
"I hope no one recognizes me, god damn, isn't there any way to get down a level in this place?!?"
He eventually finds a small dark stairway leading down the next level: 2. But the stairway end at that floor, walks up through the hallway to find an elevator that will hopefully take him straight to level 7. He walks passed a tall door wide open and overhears an interesting conversation: A Vortian Delivery Guy comes in to the room
"Here's your order of robots and other creatures from Planet Ferramentum! They just think they can create their own world, do they? Heh! Heh,heh. Can you believe that?"
A female engineer looks through the huge bag "ARGH! None of this metal trash is not good enough for our future inventions! I'm sorry, but this won't do! Bring me a better set of them soon or I'll FIRE YOU!"
"Yes...ma'am...well get right onto it...." He quickly leaves the ticked-off worker.
"And be quick! We need more metal parts to build the new plasma battle tanks!! HURRY!"
Lard Nar pauses for a moment and thinks up of a plan. A simple one, but hopefully it'll work out the way he would wanted it to. He runs into the room and pushes the huge bag onto a nearby cart and pushes it out of the room in less than a minute.
"You wouldn't mind if I go ahead and take this away, do you?" He asked in a most polite manner.
But the female engineer didn't go for that. " Oh! Of course you can go steal our precious bag! You go ahead and do it right underneath our eyes and we'll let just you get away with-----After him!! NOW!!"
Lard Nar pushes the cart very hard and jumps right onto to it, holding onto the handles The two Vortians chased after him. They go through a very long, around-a-circle-cat-and-mouse-game until Lard Nar finds an open elevator to stop right into. He and the cart go right into the strangely large elevator, and just when Lard Nar thought he'd gotten away from them, he turns around to see the both of them staring at him with glaring eyes. But the chase had been put on hold , since they're in an elevator, after all.
"Level 3..4...5...6a.." Said the elevator computer voice.
Lard Nar hid behind the cart, talking to himself so that his foes couldn't hear.
"Yes! Next floor, and I'll be flying off to Devastus with my mechanical army before I even know it! Wait a minute.....Level six....A?!?"
"Level 6a, 6b, 6c, 6d, 6e, 6f, 6g,6h, 6i,6j....."
There were so many Level sixes that the elevator had to repeat the whole alphabet four times until it can actually stop to level 7 . They almost went insane having to wait that long!
But none of the less Lard Nar can stand to be patient and made it through. "Finally! To escape this odd goons once and for all!"
Lard Nar pushed the cart out of the elevator and it was cat and mouse chase all over again. Except this time, Lard Nar managed to get far ahead and away from the stupid Vortians chasing after just to get something they don't even want.
"How stupid. Who writes this stuff anyway?"
Shut up and let me continue! I was bored, okay?!? So then he finds #777's garage door, but right next to it was a set of weird symbols on them. It was guarded by a computer and some funky coded language.
"Password, please."
"Password? PASSWORD!? The garage has a password?!?! God, if only I hadn't interrupted him I would've known it in an instant!"
This is why you listen at school, children. Otherwise you'll be missing out on something important, like The Meaning Of Life!!!!
The Goons had caught Lard Nar cornered now, getting closer and closer to the Garage door. "Come on, Lukeifus! I've found him at a dead end!!!" Shouted the arrogant female.
"I'm coming, Verozeroria! I'm just a little slow at running, is all...." There. Now you know their names, very random names, are they not?
"Oh, what to do, what to do, what to do, what to do!" Said the nervous Lard Nar, he did not know what to do next, so he did what any mere infant would do.
Punch every button on the key board.
"That was stupid." Uttered Lard Nar, but what else was there for him to do? Time ticked and tocked, step by banging step the two Vortians were right behind his back.
"Come on, come on, come onnnnn.......Do SOMETHING!!!!!"
Ding, ding, ding! "Entered Password......correct. Access approved, have a nice day!"
The garage door opened at the instant. and Lard Nar pushes himself and the cart right into the garage, the tall door slams shut right in front of Verozeroria and Lukeifis' faces.
"Darn!! What kind of freak n' password is that?!" Screamed Verozeroia, and completely forgetting the whole thing itself, the goons returned back to their jobs and ate bagels. Their more important issue of the day was who got the last bit of cream cheese .
Inside the garage, Lard Nar opens up the bag, and a pile of broken, trashy androids falls out of it . He tries to function each of the robots by pushing the button and screwing the gears on them And often kicking them hardly and screaming at them. After many minutes of doing this process, he gives up.
"Great, just great. I ran for my life down hear with a pile of the most crummy, piece of garbage ever made! If only one of them could just tell me how to work them, but not one of them can't even move a muscle or give some sort of greeting!! And the worst part of it is that I only have 3 hours left before Spork----"
FLICK!
"Hey, who disconnected the natural light spreading devices? It's so dark that the only thing I could see is that bright thing right behind...." He turns around and sees something interesting. ".....me?"
A cool, male voice speaks back at him. "Hey! Darkness is the new way to party these days! And I know how to get those dudes Partying like they mean it!! WOOO!!"
Lard Nar wasn't impressed by his fun-going personality. "How do you work them? Would you please turn on the lights for me, and who are you, exactly?"
"See my teeth glitter! Aren't they awesome!? I used a new teeth whitener and thought I should test it today!!"
Lard Nar look all over for the voice, and the only hint of knowing where he is by following his mysterious shiny white smile.
"But I thought you were going to have some kind of party, and would you please turn the lights back ON!" He searched for a light switch, but his hands didn't feel a single thing on the wall but, well wall.
"My name is Lard Nar & I want to form an army to fight against Tallest Spork and the Irken invaders at Devastus, which is you're here in the first place, so you're officially my very first member."
"That's cool man! What's a spork? I would love to help, But you'll have to find me first!! This will be fun!"
He turns back on the lights. He giggles like some kind of ghost-child and Lard Nar gets pretty annoyed by this hide and seek game. He runs, turns and rotates all around the room until he was back at his starting point ten minutes later.
"That's it! I've had enough!! I'm going to find you right now, and when I do, you have to tell me who you are, and there is nothing that you....."
He turns around, and falls back, surprised to see a floating cone with a giggly face right in front of him. But the heavenly white smile was still there.
"HI! My name's Shloonktapooxis, and I love cookies!!"
"Now we have to redesign it all over again, all because of YOU! Pack your bags and never come back here again! Nitwit."
He closes the door and waits for Lard Nar in the hallway. In the room, Lard Nar jumps off the bunk bed, pulls out his small blue suitcase, and packs his very few valuables into it.
"*sigh* Well, it's gotten a lot worse now, I don't have a job anymore and I'll probably have to live in a hobo's shack for the rest of my life, and I still hadn't committed suicide yet. Is something wrong with me? Is there still hope that good luck will surpass in me? Do I have to continue my research on Operation Impending Doom before I die?
"I just.....have this feeling that there is still something, something out there for me to achieve. Something big, important, can change history, can change lives, something involving monkeys of some sort...."
"Come on, Lard Nar! Let's move it already!" The Commander shouts outside his door. A crowd of Vortians with plastic faces and casts are behind him
"Nothing to see people, NOTHING TO SEE HERE!!! Well, actually...I guess somebody could videotape this glorious moment when that little nitwit finally leaves us alone.....FOR ONCE!! WOOO!!!"
Lard Nar walks down the hallway into an elevator. The crowd is in there with and keep following him from floor to floor, until he stands front of the door to exit the building, his job and his old, paranoid researching self, he'll.
"Okay....here it comes....the moment of truth......" Whispers the anxious 296.
The commander kicks Lard Nar out of the building with his heavy, lead and steel boot that could have you aching in pain for weeks.
Everyone shouts and cheers. "And stay out! NITWIT!!!!!"
Lard Nar lands in a garbage can that apparently, has it's metal blades out to liquefy and clean out all the garbage that's in it. It's not long before Lard Nar manages to crawl out of t with dark green blood bleeding all over his forehead.
"UGGGH....Good thing I brought medication." He takes out from the suitcase a tube of 'skin healer cream' and poured the gray stuff all over his head, and instantly the cuts and the bleeding were invisible.
"Where the hell am I going to live? On Poor Shackyton street? I guess so........*sigh*.
"I knew my life was bad because of my beliefs, but I never knew I would be from a collage graduate scientist, tester, researcher and designer in military technology into living in a home made out of board of plastic and an old mattress the next day! If only I knew what my goal in life was...."
A Vortian female walks by and throws an empty can right at Lard Nar's head. "OW!What was that for?!?!"
"For believing we're all part of the Irkens' plan to destroy the Universe!! You are a cruel Vortian to say such a thing!! I hate you!!" And she walks away from him, not even looking back.
"Well, go then ! You'll believe me one day!! You WILL!"
Lard Nar rubs his forehead where the can hit him. He looked down at the can. It landed right on its bottom and standing still, not a single dent on it. An Irken symbol was on the side of the can. Lard Nar growls at the symbol, but then enlightens himself.....And laughs.
"I know what to do! Now I know the true reason why I exist and why I didn't kill myself before!! I've got to come up with a plan and lead my own army that will defeat the superior Irken Empire and save the Universe from galactic conquest!!!! HAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!"
"Attention! Lard Na--"
Lard Nar prays for it, he's really hopeful and jolly now....
"-rrokky can sit on The Couch now. Thank You!" Buzz.
"....And in addiction, I'm gonna lay myself on that damn couch! HAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!I swear by this very can, the Irken Empire will be crushed!!!!!"
By the shouting of the word 'Crushed!', he raises one leg high up in the air, and stomps the can down with the leg only once, making the can as thin as paper.
~ IN LARD NAR'S SHACK, 9 MONTHS LATER ~
As he expected , he was living in a shack in Poor Shackyton street, researching on his computer and watching Irk through his spy cameras and was preparing himself more as each day went by. He didn't look any different other than his torn clothes, and was lucky enough to clean himself twice a week. He was watching a meeting, not letting one single eye blink from the screen inches away from his face. On it was Almighty Tallest Spork and several Irkens.
"They have a new Tallest?!?! After over 270 days they finally found out who's the tallest? HA! As if that was new! So slow in choosing, they are!!"
~ MEETING IN CONVENTIA,8 AM~
"Okay, I'm now Tallest, what do I get to do? Sit in a comfy chair in our golden palace and taunt others who are shorter than me? Even by one millimeter?" He stares at one of his advisors eye to eye.
"Yes, basically, but you have to understand that Miyuki was planning to have 75% of Irk's population. To go to Planet Devastus so they can be trained to become invaders and soldiers for our armada ;as part of her project: Operation Impending Doom."
"Operation Impending Doom? Oh yeah! That thing no other species is to know about! I get-cha! Sooo.....what do I have to do?"
"Your first act as Almighty Tallest is to open the Irken Invader Academy that we paid OVER 20,000 MONIES for."
Another Advisor steps up to Spork. "And not to mention introduce yourself on TV! That will warm you up for even more glory, royalty, and FAME!"
"But for the sake of the Control Brains, don't let this 'ZIM' guy get in the way. Finish Miyuki's project. Oh, that horrible unfortunate accident......"
"Okay! Okay! Enough commands!" The eager new Tallest shouted. "Now do I have the right to boss you around?"
"Until an Irken has grown taller than you or until you die, yes, my Tallest."
"Excellent! Off to Devastus, then! And bring me a gallon of cheese dip for my chips!!"
~LARD NAR'S SHACK~
Lard Nar flies off his chair and runs off to pack his things, talking to himself at the same time. "Devastus?? Now?!!? The time for gathering my army!
"But I'll need a ship, and willing members to join me and attack the invaders before Spork makes his speech! And it should take them....*looks at a clock*.....At least 5 hours?!? AHHH!!!!! I gotta get going! Pack my things..."
He puts all his stuff (except the TVs) in his suitcase in less than 30 seconds. "The ship! Where am I going to find a ship when all the ones above ground have been eaten?......." He thinks about this for a moment. But it does not take long for a Vortian to light the bulb.
".......That's it! That Engineer I worked with once....He told me he built 2 extra Vortian ships for himself in the Underground levels in case of emergencies....I must contact him!"
Lard Nar types rapidly onto his laptop the engineer's distant communication code for his office and almost instantly, a pink skinned Vortian's face appears on the screen.
"Hey! It's you? How's it going? Gone completely insane yet?"
Growling again, "No, but ten years ago we were working together in engineering and you told me you have vessels parked in one of the underground levels?"
"What?......Oh yeeeeeah! Those things! They're on level 7 in my garage, #24a, and the password is----"
"So can I please use one of them? It's an emergency that you wouldn't understand....Yet."
"Uh...Yeah! Sure! Go right ahead! I'm a generous guy, you know?"
"Thanks, I better be going now..."
"Wait! Before you go....well, I've been thinking about your theories for a couple of days and ...sorry about the pie. I knew it was your favorite, so that's why I threw that kind at you...."
Lard Nar was already running towards the local outdoor elevator next to his old work building before he could hear his apology. But the engineer mumbled it anyway, since it was pitiful to one's soul if he apologizes to someone whom many people hate (well, at least that was what the popular Vortians would say often during lunch break).
Lard Nar went into the elevator and it stop at the Main level of the underground part of the building, and try to find the stairs or another, more functioning elevator as fast as he could.
"I hope no one recognizes me, god damn, isn't there any way to get down a level in this place?!?"
He eventually finds a small dark stairway leading down the next level: 2. But the stairway end at that floor, walks up through the hallway to find an elevator that will hopefully take him straight to level 7. He walks passed a tall door wide open and overhears an interesting conversation: A Vortian Delivery Guy comes in to the room
"Here's your order of robots and other creatures from Planet Ferramentum! They just think they can create their own world, do they? Heh! Heh,heh. Can you believe that?"
A female engineer looks through the huge bag "ARGH! None of this metal trash is not good enough for our future inventions! I'm sorry, but this won't do! Bring me a better set of them soon or I'll FIRE YOU!"
"Yes...ma'am...well get right onto it...." He quickly leaves the ticked-off worker.
"And be quick! We need more metal parts to build the new plasma battle tanks!! HURRY!"
Lard Nar pauses for a moment and thinks up of a plan. A simple one, but hopefully it'll work out the way he would wanted it to. He runs into the room and pushes the huge bag onto a nearby cart and pushes it out of the room in less than a minute.
"You wouldn't mind if I go ahead and take this away, do you?" He asked in a most polite manner.
But the female engineer didn't go for that. " Oh! Of course you can go steal our precious bag! You go ahead and do it right underneath our eyes and we'll let just you get away with-----After him!! NOW!!"
Lard Nar pushes the cart very hard and jumps right onto to it, holding onto the handles The two Vortians chased after him. They go through a very long, around-a-circle-cat-and-mouse-game until Lard Nar finds an open elevator to stop right into. He and the cart go right into the strangely large elevator, and just when Lard Nar thought he'd gotten away from them, he turns around to see the both of them staring at him with glaring eyes. But the chase had been put on hold , since they're in an elevator, after all.
"Level 3..4...5...6a.." Said the elevator computer voice.
Lard Nar hid behind the cart, talking to himself so that his foes couldn't hear.
"Yes! Next floor, and I'll be flying off to Devastus with my mechanical army before I even know it! Wait a minute.....Level six....A?!?"
"Level 6a, 6b, 6c, 6d, 6e, 6f, 6g,6h, 6i,6j....."
There were so many Level sixes that the elevator had to repeat the whole alphabet four times until it can actually stop to level 7 . They almost went insane having to wait that long!
But none of the less Lard Nar can stand to be patient and made it through. "Finally! To escape this odd goons once and for all!"
Lard Nar pushed the cart out of the elevator and it was cat and mouse chase all over again. Except this time, Lard Nar managed to get far ahead and away from the stupid Vortians chasing after just to get something they don't even want.
"How stupid. Who writes this stuff anyway?"
Shut up and let me continue! I was bored, okay?!? So then he finds #777's garage door, but right next to it was a set of weird symbols on them. It was guarded by a computer and some funky coded language.
"Password, please."
"Password? PASSWORD!? The garage has a password?!?! God, if only I hadn't interrupted him I would've known it in an instant!"
This is why you listen at school, children. Otherwise you'll be missing out on something important, like The Meaning Of Life!!!!
The Goons had caught Lard Nar cornered now, getting closer and closer to the Garage door. "Come on, Lukeifus! I've found him at a dead end!!!" Shouted the arrogant female.
"I'm coming, Verozeroria! I'm just a little slow at running, is all...." There. Now you know their names, very random names, are they not?
"Oh, what to do, what to do, what to do, what to do!" Said the nervous Lard Nar, he did not know what to do next, so he did what any mere infant would do.
Punch every button on the key board.
"That was stupid." Uttered Lard Nar, but what else was there for him to do? Time ticked and tocked, step by banging step the two Vortians were right behind his back.
"Come on, come on, come onnnnn.......Do SOMETHING!!!!!"
Ding, ding, ding! "Entered Password......correct. Access approved, have a nice day!"
The garage door opened at the instant. and Lard Nar pushes himself and the cart right into the garage, the tall door slams shut right in front of Verozeroria and Lukeifis' faces.
"Darn!! What kind of freak n' password is that?!" Screamed Verozeroia, and completely forgetting the whole thing itself, the goons returned back to their jobs and ate bagels. Their more important issue of the day was who got the last bit of cream cheese .
Inside the garage, Lard Nar opens up the bag, and a pile of broken, trashy androids falls out of it . He tries to function each of the robots by pushing the button and screwing the gears on them And often kicking them hardly and screaming at them. After many minutes of doing this process, he gives up.
"Great, just great. I ran for my life down hear with a pile of the most crummy, piece of garbage ever made! If only one of them could just tell me how to work them, but not one of them can't even move a muscle or give some sort of greeting!! And the worst part of it is that I only have 3 hours left before Spork----"
FLICK!
"Hey, who disconnected the natural light spreading devices? It's so dark that the only thing I could see is that bright thing right behind...." He turns around and sees something interesting. ".....me?"
A cool, male voice speaks back at him. "Hey! Darkness is the new way to party these days! And I know how to get those dudes Partying like they mean it!! WOOO!!"
Lard Nar wasn't impressed by his fun-going personality. "How do you work them? Would you please turn on the lights for me, and who are you, exactly?"
"See my teeth glitter! Aren't they awesome!? I used a new teeth whitener and thought I should test it today!!"
Lard Nar look all over for the voice, and the only hint of knowing where he is by following his mysterious shiny white smile.
"But I thought you were going to have some kind of party, and would you please turn the lights back ON!" He searched for a light switch, but his hands didn't feel a single thing on the wall but, well wall.
"My name is Lard Nar & I want to form an army to fight against Tallest Spork and the Irken invaders at Devastus, which is you're here in the first place, so you're officially my very first member."
"That's cool man! What's a spork? I would love to help, But you'll have to find me first!! This will be fun!"
He turns back on the lights. He giggles like some kind of ghost-child and Lard Nar gets pretty annoyed by this hide and seek game. He runs, turns and rotates all around the room until he was back at his starting point ten minutes later.
"That's it! I've had enough!! I'm going to find you right now, and when I do, you have to tell me who you are, and there is nothing that you....."
He turns around, and falls back, surprised to see a floating cone with a giggly face right in front of him. But the heavenly white smile was still there.
"HI! My name's Shloonktapooxis, and I love cookies!!"