"Dorothy, no, you can't do the disclaimer. You made a right mess of it last time, throwing a temper tantrum like that, I was so embarrassed!"

"I'm sorry, I swear I won't do it again! Honest!"

"Bull shit"

"I won't, see I'll prove it!"

"No, Dorothy give it back, get out of here, scram!" *Grabs keyboard out of Dorothy's hands* "shoo!"

Ok nothing is mine, I own nothing

Chapter 7 Turn Left At Every Starbucks

"Your first task is to kill Voldemort" Simon said, "once you have done that you can come back and do the next task. Voldemort can be found in the East, past the 7-11, but if you see a Tim Horton's then you've gone too far and will probably die. Take a left at every Starbucks, turn right at the seventeenth Wal-Mart that you come by and keep going straight until you hit Disneyland and then turn left and go into the nearest McDonald's where you'll find Voldemort working from his secret hideout in the dumpster. And watch out for flying beavers."

"That doesn't sound so bad," Stuff said as they left the castle.

At the 21st Starbucks flying beavers suddenly picked up the five of them.

"Oh well, this sure beats walking," Tingrin said cheerfully, "these beavers can take us straight to Moldywart or what ever his name is."

"Its Voldemort," said Harry, whose had joined the pack carrying Sirius and the others, "hi Sirius!"

"What the hell are you doing here?!" Sirius said in surprise

"Well it's nice to see you too," Harry said sarcastically, "see what happened was that I got stuck under the bed and-"

"You too?" Dorothy said sympathetically

"Yeah,' Harry continued, "and I ended up here and the sparkly lady with the demented munchkins that sing asked me if I knew you and I said I did and she magicked me to the guy at the place and he got me this beaver. So now I'm here with you guys." he finished

"Hey wait,' Sirius said slowly, "if the sparkly lady magicked you to the place then why didn't she just do the same for me?"

"But then you wouldn't have met us!" Stuff said indignantly

"That's the point," Sirius said

"Well I guess its cuz of that boy-who-lived thing" Harry said with a shrug, "and anyway the author didn't want to have to explain how I got down the puce vinyl path like three times faster than you guys. So what're we doing?"

"I SHOULD HAVE KNOWN!! THAT LAZY AUTHOR!" Dorothy yelled

"Dorothy do you want to wait in the car?!"

"Sorry ms. author person"

"I still don't like your tone, watch it missy,"

"Sorry"

Ok back to the story

"We're going to kill Voldemort," Flammable said happily.

After a rather enjoyable ride, the beavers dropped them off in front of a dumpster at Mc Donald's. They climbed in and found Voldemort waiting for them, holding a cigar with and evil glint in his eye.

"Well well won't this be fun," Voldemort said with a sneer.

A/N he he he what will happen? Anyway um thanks to all my reviewers. Ronandchicken, have you read Lemony Snicket's books by any chance. If you haven't I think you should. Especially the Unauthorised Autobiography. You really remind me of him. No offence. Thank you for reviewing and keep reading! Right now I got to go stop Dorothy from killing Sirius, she's chasing him and she's gaining on him. I don't want to think about what will happen if she catches him!

"Dorothy leave Sirius alone"

"But I just want to kiss him!"

*Sirius starts to run faster, author grabs Dorothy and ties her to chair*

"You stay on that chair until you learn to behave yourself!"

"Thank you thank you thank you!"