Angst! Similes! Scarily short chapters!

I've had the first three parts written for months, and kept meaning to post them. I'll be posting them over the next few days. Let's just say . . . posting on separate days = more reviews. I'm such a review whore. ^_^

All The Words We Couldn't Say Part One

Beneath the harsh, fluorescent lights of the supermarket, the ring on Hikari's finger glittered as brightly as spite. If nothing else, she would be spared one, small humiliation. She picked a discreet, white box from the shelf for no other reason than it was discreet and white. Hesitating for a second, she added another one to her carrier bag, which already held her carton of milk and her loaf of bread. She remembered reading in a newspaper article that these tests were often inaccurate. To be certain, she had to take it twice. Her own calm amazed her.

She walked to the checkout counter and placed her purchases on it. She made no effort to hide the pregnancy tests. She had nothing about which to be ashamed; her ring asserted her right to buy them. As she had expected, the girl behind the till glanced from the boxes to her hand, an almost imperceptible flicker of her dark eyes, and a little smile came to her face when she saw her wedding band.

"Does your husband know?"

"No," she replied.

The words were the cold, absolute truth. Her husband did not know. She had walked out on him two weeks ago with all her possessions in two suitcases and all her certainties gone forever.

The girl picked up on her lack of enthusiasm, if not the reason for it, "Don't worry. I'm sure he'll be happy when you tell him."

"Happy," she echoed, "Maybe."

When she arrived back at the motel, she dropped her shopping bags on the counter and pulled her suitcase out from the closet. She removed her favourite pair of soft, faded pyjamas and changed into them, before fetching one of the pregnancy tests and seating herself comfortably on the bed. Opening the box, she saw it contained what looked to be a white, plastic stick, around which was wrapped a set of instructions. She glanced at the pamphlet quickly to see what she had to do. All she had to do was urinate on one end of the stick and wait for fifteen minutes for it to develop the results, based on the level of hormone in it. A blue line indicated a positive result; if it remained white, it was negative. Nothing could have been simpler, she thought dully, and nothing could have been harder.

Uncertainly was easy. As long as she didn't know, she didn't have to make any choices about her future or face the confusing feelings that she rather would have ignored.

If it were positive, she did not know what she was going to do. Adoption and abortion were options, but she knew she could never consider either one of them. There was equally no question of keeping it from her husband. It would be his baby as well and he had a right to know it. He had a right to be a part of its life, even if it were painful for her to have to see him when he came to visit it. Besides, she would not deny her baby the knowledge of its father.

If it were negative . . . . She pushed the thought away from her. It would not matter, because she refused to let her having a baby patch up their marriage. She knew couples who had had children in order to save their marriages and who had only ended up unhappier than they were before. They passed every day of their lives hating each other, justifying years of misery and resentment by saying it was for the sake of their children. She would not give up what little love still remained between her and Takeru for that sort of togetherness. And yet it would have been nice to have an excuse to call him, to ask him to try again.

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TO BE CONTINUED