** DISCLAIMER I do not own any character appearing on "General Hospital".

*words* = thoughts "words" = talking/speaking ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

CHAPTER 12: Zander Faces The Present

Zander couldn't sleep all night. Although the bed in the guest room at Beth's was the most comfortable bed he's slept in, he still couldn't get to sleep. Emily was on his mind the whole night. He knew that her not loving him anymore was not his fault, he didn't know why she would want to give it all up, give up the love they once shared. He will try to win her back, but how?

He thought he smelled coffee, so Zander decided to go and investigate. He walked cautiously down the stairs and to the kitchen. He saw Beth sitting at the island with a cup of tea in her hands. He wondered why she was up, he wondered what had upset her after she got home from her date with Jax.

"Hey, can't get to sleep?", asked Zander.

"How did you know?", asked Beth sarcastically, "Couldn't you get to sleep either?"

"Well yeah, I couldn't stop thinking about where Emily lost her love for me. And I smelled coffee, where is it?"

"It's over there in the pot on the counter, I thought I'd make some for the guard on duty tonight. I wish I didn't have guards, all I said to my father was 'it would be nice to have a security system', so instead of one of those computerized ones, he thought it would be best to have a guard. But anyway, Zander you and Emily sound like you were meant for each other, I can't see why she wants that creep of a Cassadine."

"Why do you say he's a creep?"

"Because he wanted to marry me for my money, and have an heir. But I said no. I mean isn't that creepy?"

"Yeah it is, I know his family is in financial trouble but, marrying you? Isn't that a little too far?"

"Yes I think so, but apparently there was some sort of agreement drawn up between my grandfather and his grandmother, sometime ago that if one family was in financial ruin that the two families would marry to stave off failure. It's so dumb. Sorry to tell you all this."

"That's okay. I'm glad you told me, I don't think I would want a Cassadine raising my daughter."

"Yeah and I bet you wouldn't want a Jacks raising her too."

"Is that why you looked upset from your date last night? What happened?"

"He took me to the PC Grill, he had a steak while I had roast chicken. We danced and while we were dancing, he whispered in my ear that he's never met someone like me before. He said I was sweet and honest and the most intriguing woman he's ever met. He asked me if I would feel comfortable pursuing the relationship further. And all I could think of was Erin, and all of the other women he probably told this to."

"Aww.. Beth, don't be hard on yourself. Any guy would throw themselves at you I wouldn't doubt. "

"Well when you work in a hospital a lot of guys try to throw themselves at you. So have you figured out what to do with the situation between you and Emily?"

"Nope, my dad suggested to just let her go. You know tell her that no matter what, that I will always love her."

"Aww… Zander, just remember you will always have your daughter who will always love you."

*Beth is right,* thought Zander, *even if Emily doesn't love me anymore I will still be needed.* This was it, Zander had to face his present day situation, his marriage is falling apart, he has a daughter and he is starting to develop a relationship with his father. He had no career and Faith Roscoe was offering him a job practically everyday, he thought maybe because of his past employment by Sonny Corinthos.

Zander was wondering too if Beth wanted to pursue Jax and what may result in their family dynamic. He didn't really know Jax that well but he knew that Jax would dump Beth if anyone else came along. He didn't want Beth to suffer anymore heartache.

It was 4am, Beth decided that if she couldn't get back to sleep she may as well just go to work. Zander on the other hand went back to bed, he already told Beth that he would look after Erin, since Erin had a day off school. He couldn't get to sleep he couldn't help but wonder where his life can go from here, he didn't have a job (which meant that he hadn't paid a penny of child support, although Beth never said a word about it), he didn't have a wife who loves him anymore and he has a family now that needed him. He wasn't too sure if Beth was the woman he could see himself being with for the rest of his life, she was his first love and they do have a daughter together, but then he loves Emily too.

A couple more hours passed by, he looked over at the bedside clock, it read ten-thirty in the morning. He then tried to rollover to the other side of the bed, but something was preventing him, he noticed that Erin had crawled into bed with him, his tossing and turning had woke her up.

"You know mommy doesn't let me sleep in this late.", said Erin.

"Well I guess mommy didn't tell me that. What do you want for breakfast?", asked Zander.

"Count Chocula!", exclaimed Erin, "Mommy lets me have it on the days where I don't have to go to school, but every day I have oatmeal or something else that doesn't taste as good."

"Let's go find Count Chocula then.", said Zander as Erin climbed on his back so he could give her a piggy back all the way down to the kitchen.

They arrived in the kitchen, Erin pointed out to Zander where the cereal was. He had just nicely poured both the cereal and the milk into the bowls when there was a knock at the door. Zander left Erin in the kitchen while he went to answer the door. He stood in shock, it was Emily.