Author's Note: I'm so. so. so. so. so very soorrrrry! After I finished writing Chapter 18, I had an accident involving my beloved pet hamster, Yuki, and I went into a depressed state. Then, when my pet Yuki recovered, I was suddenly hit with a bad case of writer's block! But I'm back with another chapter, again it might or might not move the plot. I'm VERY happy that this story is doing so well and I find that I really don't deserve all your praises. Thank you all once again for sticking with me!

I found this chapter to be so random, but I couldn't write anything better. Many thanks to Jieli for being my beta reader for this chapter. Thanks buddy!

Disclaimer: I own nothing!



Chapter 17: Kaiba has a ...?


Maybe if I don't move they won't notice me…

His eyes wondered as his thoughts didn't match reality. All eyes were on him after his outburst.

…So much for that theory…

"Oh, looks like we have a live one!"

Kaiba froze in place. Why is Pegasus pointing at me…?

"What do you say ladies, how about we ask this young miss to join on us stage?"

"Whaa…?" a baffled Kaiba uttered, as he heard encouraged applause from the female audience of duelists. Kaiba could think of only one thing: act shy, sit back down, slump in your seat, and conceal your face with your hand to display your mortification.

It was a brilliant plan! Well it was the only plan he thought of at the moment, so he supposed it was an ingenious one. Before he could take his seat, two arms appeared from nowhere and held him up. He turned around to find two women standing in the row behind him. One was a large, brute looking woman with blonde hair and black shades. The other was older woman, also, wearing shades but with braided gray hair. Both decked out black suits, identical to the one's that Pegasus men wore at Duelist Kingdom

"Miss, I recommend that you come with us. Master Pegasus requests that you go up on stage."

What? But what about Seto-sama's brilliant plan, thought Kaiba in the third person.

"You're coming with us!" The brute woman informed Kaiba, sounding as if he was giving him an ultimatum.

Of course, ultimatum or no, he wasn't going to give up without a fight. Moving as quickly as possible, he used is strength to escape their grasp and dropped down to his seat. And holding on to dear life, he wrapped his arms around the arms rest. Both women then began to wage a tug of war with the stubborn Kaiba.

On stage, Pegasus beckoned Kaiba to come on stage, "Come on," he coaxed. "Don't be shy! Ladies, let's encourage this young lady!" At that moment, the audience began to cheer their encouragement.

This is harassment!! Kaiba gritted his teeth as he struggled to fight against the two women who were pulling on him. He knew that he was winning since he could feel the two women's grip loosen. However, without him noticing, he felt something creep up his sides.

"HAHAHAHHAA…Stop it!" he resisted any sort of laughter, but was having a hard time since he was being tickled.

Feeling that the situation needed some spice, Mai felt that it would be interesting if Kaiba were to go up on stage and meet up with his rival and little brother. The only way that would happen if she helped get him up there. So, she began to tickle Kaiba at his sides, in hopes of him loosening his hold.

Kaiba, powerless to stop both parties at the same time, finally let go. As he did, since he was being excessively pulled on, the two women and he were sent flying backwards.

"Kimiko?!??" Joey asked, being the first to display his concern.

Peering over, Mai looked to see what had happened to Kaiba. When she did, faster than she could react, she was confronted face to face with the angry CEO.

She nervously chuckled, "You're okay, right?"

The look on Kaiba's face at the moment signified the end of her young tragic life. She held her breath for what seemed like forever, as the angry CEO's eyes seemed to pierce right through her.

Thankfully at that moment, Kaiba did the unexpected. He fainted.

Exhaling deeply, she felt so relieved! For a moment she could feel her heart skip a beat.

"Ah, she blacked out from hitting her head!" Yugi exclaimed as he jumped over his seat to aid the fallen Kaiba.

Joey too followed suit, and went to help. "Kimiko, say somethin'!"

Téa and Serenity also jumped up to help out. As both jumped over to get to the other row, they heard a simultaneous "urgh" sound.

"AHH, Sorry, I'm so sorry!" Téa frantically jumped after landing on one of the two women that was also fell over.

"Sorry. Sorry. Sorry. Sorry." Serenity apologized, as she bent down to help the one woman she had stepped on. "Huh? What's this?"

"Those are wigs…?" Téa looked puzzled, as Serenity held two wigs in her hands. She then looked down and found their owners, "Croquet? Kimo?"

-~--~--~--~--~--~--~--~--~--~-~--~--~--~--~--~--~--~-

Somewhere, away from the commotion that had been going on in the auditorium, Bakura wandered aimlessly. He looked down at his Millennium Ring, which had smoke coming out of it. It was a shock to Bakura to find that even Millennium Items also overheated from excessive use. An experience he could relate to all to well with the "toaster incident" from last year.

The last he had seen of his partner, Téa, was when she had entered the auditorium along with other female duelist. Particularly, he hadn't put any thoughts into actually participating fully in the tournament. His plan from the beginning was to whack the Millennium Item holder with a piece of steak and make a break for it. However, he lacked the steak and the actual Millennium Item holder.

He would have to find the Millennium Items the old fashion way, by searching through the duelist's belongings as they slept and eat the food out of those little refrigerators they kept at hotels, allowing the guest to foot the bill.

It was the only logical thing to do in this case.

Finding that it was about time he'd join up with Tea, Bakura made his way to the auditorium. His path was hindered as he felt that he had kicked something. Looking down, he picked up the object to inspect it, "…What the hell is this furry creature?"

"I wuv you" it spoke to him.

"… I wonder if the shadow realm tortures useless contraptions as well?"

-~--~--~--~--~--~--~--~--~--~-~--~--~--~--~--~--~--~-

Téa gasped, "Ah! Those two are--"

"Croquet and Kimo!" Joey took a fighting stance and growled at the two, "What the hell are you doing here?"

Both Croquet and Kimo rubbed their heads and got up. Croquet was the first to speak "Ouch, my head."

"AHHHHHHHH!!! Those men were disguised as women!!"

"Huh?" Kimo looked rather puzzled. Yet, he became full aware that several women began to surround around them, each snarling at him and Croquet.

"Get em'!!!"

After the sound of a battle cry of one of the women, Croquet and Kimo dashed off; leaving a dust trail, behind them several women chasing them armed with hairbrushes.

"…That was unexpected…" Joey said, the rest nodding in agreement.

A small figure ran up to the group that was attending the fallen Kaiba. It turned out Mokuba had seen all that had unveiled and rushed over to his brother's side.

The younger Kaiba reached his brother's side. He crouched down to try and wake up his older brother. "Tell me you're okay, big brother!"

Yugi's eyes widened. Had Mokuba said "big brother?" It wasn't possible that…

For Mokuba, he was petrified. He was so dead. All heard his voice projected throughout the entire auditorium and the words "are you okay, big brother?" He had forgotten to turn off the microphone he was currently holding in one hand.

The whole audience gasped. At the moment, Kaiba began to regain consciousness. He was feeling light-headed, to put it mildly. He woke up to a strange sight: four girls, Mai and Mokuba were hovering over him, and all were staring at him, then at Mokuba.

"Uh…" Mokuba picked up his microphone nervously. He had to think fast to cover up his brother's identity. An idea struck Mokuba, the only plausible one that could cover up his slip up: "...are you okay, big brother's girlfriend?"

This time, the audience's gasps were even louder.

"…oh wha…" groggily Kaiba responded..

-~--~--~--~--~--~--~--~--~--~-~--~--~--~--~--~--~--~-

"MWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA"

A pause for an intake of air,

"MWHWHAHHAHAHA, you all will become sacrifices!"

Yami Malik (Gasp, bet you didn't see that coming!) grinned evilly as he watched chaos ensue around him. His "minions" were doing his bidding and he was in control of his host's body. It was indeed one a happy, joyous, massacre killing fun day for the loveable psycho.

Something bothered him though. Instead of appearing in front of a Pharaoh and initiating some stabbing upon him, he was in an extravagant hotel. In one hand, his precious Millennium Rod had been shamed, as someone had decorated it in ribbons, glitter, and other decorative materials that would make him the laughing stock of the other Millennium item holders. And the most obvious annoyance to him at the moment was that his host has made a few changes to his body.

"I wonder if I touch--"

"Hold it right there, Malik!"

"Isis?!??" His hands fumbled, and he frantically put them behind his back. "I wasn't going to really touch them! I just wanted to see if they were real!"

"…What are you talking about?" Isis questioned.

"Nothing…" Yami Malik shifted his eyes, "Nothing at all…"

"Malik! What is going on here?! Did your evil spirit take over your body?"

"What gave you that idea?" Mocked Yami Malik.

"The vending machine still has some chips dangling to it!" Isis pointed to the vending machine that indeed had some Doritos dangling.

Yami Malik arched an eyebrow, "…you mean you haven't noticed people screaming and yelling 'please spare me from eternal torment' nor small woodland creatures screeching at my appearance?" And by coincidence, a squirrel did pass by and screeched at Yami Malik's presence. "See?"

"You're not getting away with this, evil spirit!" Isis declared, ignoring all that was said. "What you say to me has no relevance, for you will not be spared! For I know, that you know, that I know, that you can't be Malik! Why? Cause as long as there is a vending machine, there will be Malik, putting in quarters and buying out all the junk food it has!!"

"Hai, Mistress Isis." Rishid, who was at Isis' side, was obligated to agree with his mistress. And they ask why Master Malik isn't as smart as he is!

"Who's the broad?" Yami Malik asked, pointing to Rishid.

"Why it's Rishid of course. My secret weapon!"

"Rishid!!!!!" panicked Yami Malik, "Where?"

"Here!" Isis yelled.

"Where?!??"

"Here! Right here!"

"…you're a cruel one, Isis. You can't play with a Yami's feeling like that!"

"Oh no, you aren't affected by Rishid! You aren't supposed to exist when Rishid is around!"

"Mistress Isis, I believe Malik doesn't recognize me. My veils conceal the scars I endured for Master Malik. The pain I wished to suffer with him--"

"Yeah, Yeah, blah, blah, blah. We just have to think of a new strategy, that's all. He must have some weakness …Rishid?"

"Yes, Mistress Isis?"

"STRIP!"

"What?!? You can't be serious? I'll just take off the veil that's all--"

She gave him the evil eye. "We have no time for your plan, Rishid. STRIP, NOW!"

Later...

"Tee-hee, Rishid I can't see your goodies." The normal Malik giggled.

-~--~--~--~--~--~--~--~--~--~-~--~--~--~--~--~--~--~-

Did I wake up in hell or something…?

Kaiba couldn't fathom how horribly wrong the situation had gone for him.

First, he'd fainted. HIM! The actual Seto Kaiba had fainted after hitting his head. He was never as weak to allow that to happen. He'd have to let that slide because of who he was trying to be at the moment.

Second, he still hadn't found the Blue Eyes White Dragon card.

Third, he was dressed as a woman and trying to keep up the façade.

And lastly, to his horror he had just been declared by his younger brother to be his own girlfriend.

Fluttering his eyes open, he saw Mai having a hard time containing herself. She was clutching her stomach to stop herself from laughing.

His ears could pick up the murmuring and gossiping had gone on throughout the audience, as this was, after all, the scandal of the moment.

Off on one side, Joey looked at him. Figures that Kaiba would go for this chick…too bad she's cute, but the attitude is more like Kaiba…

Close by, jealous eyes were glaring at him, ones belonging to Serenity. This girl is with Kaiba? And to add to her jealous thoughts, she was strangling what she thought was a chair, but turned out to be Téa.

"S-S-Ser—enity!!"

"Oh, sorry Téa. I thought you were Kimiko—uh I mean, thought you were somebody else." She released her grip on Téa, who fell backwards, looking oddly at the red-haired girl.

"Don't worry about it," Téa hesitatingly reassured her, feeling uneasy about jealous Wheeler. It was a scary thought if you were Kimiko at the moment

As for Kimiko herself, or again I should say, Kaiba himself, he was feeling unbelievably annoyed. "Oh God, I can't feel my legs!"

"Oh, whoops I'm standing on them!" Joey excused, removing himself off of Kaiba's legs.

Kaiba's eyes involuntarily twitched. If the world weren't spinning for him at the moment, he would have killed the girl called Joni by now.

Being a bit timid to ask, Mokuba once again voiced his concern for his brother. "Are you okay?"

Mokuba wasn't greeted by any verbal response. Instead, his brother motioned for him to move in closer. When Mokuba was in earshot, Kaiba whispered something that only he could hear. After what was said, Mokuba looked as if he'd seen a ghost.

Yugi motioned over to Joey. "Joni, what do you think Kimiko said to Mokuba?"

Joey shrugged, "Dunno. Hey, there are a lot of people missing all of a sudden."

"Hm, you're right! The ones that were chasing Kimo and Croquet aren't back either… something fishy is going on…"

-~--~--~--~--~--~--~--~--~--~-~--~--~--~--~--~--~--~-

"Yami Malik did what?"

"Sister, it's true! My other self created Furby and Beanie Baby armies and commanded them to bring him some sacrifices."

"Furbies…? Beanie Babies?" Rishid inquired.

"Yeah! He went even more psycho-psycho! Don't worry, they should be deactivated…I mean after they served their purpose of snatching women and placing them into their bodies for all eternity, they should have gone kaput."

Isis glared at her brother, "Malik, what did you have to eat today?"

"Um, let me see. I ate some cereal, exactly one fourth of a melon, two cookies made with real fudge, um, a mint, and an expired snickers bar… I think that's it!"

"Are you sure?"

"I had these pixie sticks I was saving for later!" Malik searches his pocket, "Hey, where'd they go!"

"That explains it. Yami Malik must have consumed those pixie sticks and they seeped into his brain and caused him to hallucinate. Instead of creating fearsome creatures, he created adorable creatures."

I'd hardly call them adorable, Rishid added.

"I always knew Pixie Sticks were the source of all evil." Isis nodded her head. "What else could explain all those times we pretended to be mob bosses and went around beating people with pipes?"

"Actually, Isis-sama, you never ate any Pixie Sticks when you beat those people."

"Nonsense! It was the Pixie Sticks. I curse those marketers and their clever techniques!" stopping in mid sentence "My Millennium Necklace is telling me that danger is nearby!"

Oh so now it's the Millennium Necklace, not the "voices". Rishid groaned.

Using her sixth sense, Isis scanned the area, looking paranoid then cautious. "Rishid, Malik, don't you feel as if you're being watched?"

"Could it be that pink-haired girl watching us from over there?"

Rishid and Isis looked at Malik, "What girl?"

"She's been watching me a lot! I think she's my new best friend. Yoo-hoo, over here!" Malik waved.

A small yelp was heard as a pink-haired figure stumbled from out of the shadows.

"I—uh…." Bakura was flabbergasted. How the was it possible that the purple-haired girl saw him? He had hidden himself quite well. He was good at hide and seek, so how could he have lost to that girl after all these years? He felt like he'd lost a part of himself, as she had defeated him.

"Look, he's holding a Furby!"

Dashing as fast as he could, Malik slapped the creature out of Bakura's grasp. He picked it up and threw it out of the window. Its last words were echoed: "I wuv yoooooooooou!!!"

"Hey!" A mad Bakura barked. "Get your own torture victims!"

-~--~--~--~--~--~--~--~--~--~-~--~--~--~--~--~--~--~-

"Sorry, ladies, for the delay! It seems I have received some terrible news. Several of your fellow duelists have dropped due to unforeseen circumstances," Pegasus explained.

"I wonder what happened?" Yugi felt something scratching his feet. He looked down and saw a Furby toy on the floor. He picked it up. "Hey, does this belong to anyone?"

Nobody claimed it, willingly or otherwise.

"Oh well!" He tossed the toy near a trashcan, where it landed carelessly.

However, unbeknownst to Yugi, that particular Furby activated after the impact. Its eyes glowed red and out of its very small frame, popped out a small, indiscreet laser weapon.

The Furby had its sight locked on Yugi, obeying its master's command of finding sacrifices.

"OMG! Look at this, Otogi-sama! It's a Furby!" Luckily, before any damage had been done, Otogi Girl #2 picked up to discarded toy. "Hey, why does its eyes have the writing, 'Must obey the Lord of the Rod, Master Malik?' Tee-hee, that sounds soooooo dirty!!"

"Get rid of the thing!" Otogi commanded, who was feeling grumpy at the moment. The whole event was going nowhere. He'd been waiting an awful long time for the orientation that Pegasus was giving to be over. Unexpected delays had forced him to endure another session of mindless chatter from his group of stalkers, the Otogi Girls.

"…I'm feeling this empty feeling… like…something very dear to me has disappeared."

"Otogi...Decia-sama, the place got kinda empty…." Otogi Girl # 3 whined.

Otogi wasn't paying any mind to her at the moment, as he was still pondering. "I just know something is missing, but what?"

Pegasus cleared his throat and spoke into his microphone. "As I was trying to say before all this mess, you'll all be divided into eight groups, ranging from Group A to Group H. The winners of each group will head to the semi-finals where they will compete with one another until two are left. Those two will go to the finals and the winner will be declared the winner of our tournament. Tomorrow we'll start off the tournament; till then, you are free to enjoy all of the facilities here at Funny Bunny Resort and Casino!"

Otogi's eyes widened; he had realized his worst nightmare: "WHERE DID ALL THE GIRLS GO?!?!"

-~--~--~--~--~--~--~--~--~--~-~--~--~--~--~--~--~--~-

I just have to have one outburst every chapter. Aw well, please review! Thanks a lot!

To My Reviewers: (hopefully I'm starting at the same place I left off)

Ancient Angel - (Chapter 17) Yeah I know, it's so hard to update! Thank you for the lovely comment that i'm doing my job. I don't feel like I am, but thanks for the comment nonetheless. (Chapter 18) Aw, your making me blush!

Cettie-girl - (Chapter 17) Thank you! Yeah, I don't know why I think Yugi's mom would have problems with Yugi. C'mon Yugi's so Kawaii. Thank you for reviewing! (Chapter 18) I'm trying to add as many of the boys in my story as possible. If not here, in the next installment.

onlyHAUNTED - (Chapter 17) Yes, I know it was meant as a filler. I just didn't want to leave you guys hanging, and the best I could come up was that chapter. Thanks for reviewing. (Chapter 18) I should move the plot, but I main purpose is to give a laugh or two. I never actually thought about the plot of the story till now, hopefully I'll pull it off.

ACME-Rian - (Chapter 17) I think Yugi isn't a person who'd do any harm to anyone. Especially you! Don't worry I haven't forgotten to give a role in the fic. I'm giving you a small part in the next chapter! (Chapter 18) I apologize. I know I'm a ver random person.

samurai-ashes - (Chapter 17) It was fun writing it as it was for you reading it I hope. Thanks for reviewing. (Chapter 18) It's fun to watch any anime with family. They're make the most FUNNIEST comments. In other animes, I tried to explain to my father about the story and characters. It's so funny when he says "isn't that the guy Goku" and he's pointing at any anime male other than the real Goku from Dragonball Z.

Mooncinder - (Chapter 17) Um, I'll update when I can...but otherwise, I have to thank you again for submitting those questions. It gave me material to write with. Thanks. (Chapter 18) I know, I have to move the plot. I can't get that through my thick skull.

Jieli - (Chapter 17) My buddy! Uh, well I'm at a lost for words, but I want to say your helping me is a wonderful! I just talk to you a lot, so I have no idea what to say here... except Many Thank You's!! (Chapter 18) I read your review for Chapter 18, I have to say I find that Ch. 18 was one of my favorties. I was so random and it is something I like writing about when I the "girls" interact with each other.

Isis Hotep - (Chapter 17) I was only happy to answer your questions. It was fun!

Im Evil - (Chapter 17) How weird. You knew kinda predicted that I would insert Mokuba in Chapter 18. It would have been a good to use your idea, except I wrote the chapter before your review. It sounded like a really good! I'm sorry i'm making you wait for my chapters. I'll work harder.

Panseru - (Chapter 17) Fishies? LOL. Thank you for thinking this is a good story. I'm always happy to hear it! Thank you!

neutral element - (Chapter 17) It has been a long time since I last heard from you! Thanks for reviewing and do update your stories! (Chapter 18) I didn't think of that idea! I thought of something funny, but I loved your idea. I could work that out in the sequel, cause in this story it wouldn't work out as I would like to. Don't worry, Pegasus, as I have planned, will make the boys uncomfortable!

Umiko Morimoto - (Chapter 18) Wow, it's almost like you read my mind! It is like you read, Mokuba does spill the beans and says "big brother" but with more horrible results! It's weird, you predicted what was going to happen! Thanks for reviewing.

Mokuba-chan - (Chapter 18) Aw, thank you! I'm glad you like the story!

linzy8554 - (Chapter 18) I had to add Mokuba! Seto can't be without him! Thanks for reviewing.

Hikari - (Chapter 18) Hello! Thanks for taking the time to review my story! I'm not creative at all. I'm just VERY, VERY, VERY, weird.

Ieyre - (Chapter 18) First off, thank you for reviewing. Yeah, I had to make Kaiba suffer with his little brother there. I wanted Mokuba to be more harmful, then helpful.. And as for the guys, let's say, they'll meet with Pegasus individually and hopefully with hiliarious results!

Flower Petals - (Chapter 18) I'm happy to hear from you again. It's okay, I haven't updated frequently. I don't mind late reviews or no reviews at all. I'm just happy to hear about my writing. Thanks for reviewing!

Ice-Spirit Phoenix - (Chapter 18) Thank you for your words of encouragement. I'm glad that you found my story to be amusing. That's was my goal, to give out a few laughs. I never thought of a plot...now I have to think of one...well, anyways, Thank you !

Renee - (Chapter 18) I know, crossdressing is an uncomfortable subject, but when it comes to my writing, I make it out to be through the eyes of any body who doesn't think things through. Don't take what I say too seriously. It' s all in good fun! Thanks for reviewing!