Spork In Yer Eyes Fic
Spork In Yer Eyes Fic
The Enterprise shook as it took fire from the insanely huge and monstrously powerful alien vessel that looked real big n stuff.
"Uhura! Raise Hailing Frequencies! Get Me that ship Damnit!" Captain Kirk's voice was demanding and harsh against the battle sounds.
"I'm trying Sir, but they're not responding." Uhura's voice was as always just short of sultry mixed with panicked.
Spock almost audibly groaned, his headache growing larger as he watched all this human display of emotion.
He turned back to his displays as the Doctor's voice came over the intercom on schedule.
"Jim! What are you doing to this ship? I have half a sickbay full of people down here!"
"Not now Bones" Kirk cut off the Doctor's irate reply as he turned back forward.
"Sulu. Where are My weapons?"
"Inoperable Sir."
"Captain,"Uhura spoke up,"They are hailing us now."
"Put it on main screen"
"I am James t Kirk of the Federatio-"
"None Shall Pass!"
"...what?"
"None Shall Pass!"
"...We didnt want to pass-- we were going that way and you came from over there," Kirk said making gestures in widely different directions, "and we just were minding out own business before you shot My ship up!" Kirk's voice seemed to soar to a dramatic point at the end, and hung there breathless as the alien looked on, confused.
"...oh"
"OH? OH? Thats what you say after shooting My ship up?"
"Captain! Scott has restored main power to shields and weapons!"
"Good, Sulu! Fire all phasers!"
"what, now?"
"Did I stutter, Sulu?"
"Well, no Sir, but... they aren't exactly attacking now." Sulu's voice trailed off as he looked hopefully around the bridge for support, but the others were all studiously avoiding his gaze.
"Sulu..."the Captain's voice was steady and very very calm, and Sulu cringed."Do you really want a repeat of the Kenner episode?"
Spock watched all this with what in a human would have been called amusement and irritation.
Sulu shrunk into his seat remembering the episode of the cadet who had disobeyed the Captain and nearly gotten the ship destroyed. His voice came out strained as he answered,"No Sir"
"Then fire the Damn Phasers!"
The alien on the screen raised a hand and seemed to be ready to object to this, before saying, "Oh bugger" as his ship dissolved into a morass of light and sound
"There now, set us on a heading towards beta Seven"
"Yes Sir"
Suddenly the ship was rocked by a shuddering movement. and stopped.
"...all stop Sulu"
Sulu glanced at the captain, glanced at heir stopped position and then sighed and said,"All Stop, aye Sir" and turned off the engines.
Scotty's voice immediately sprang from the intercom.
"Sir! ye canna do this to my engines and expect them to hold together. I'm giving them all she's got!"
"...Scott."
"Aye Sir"
"How can you be giving them all she's got, when we are not moving?"
"...Scott out"
A Strange voice spoke into their heads even as a odd image of a man in flowing robes appeared.
"You have violated out rules of civilized combat and must be punished accordingly."
The captain distinctly heard from several mouths"oh no not again", as he flicked on the intercom.
"McCoy will you come up here and argue with a hideously powerful and annoying superbeing for me. its been a long day"
"Sure thing, sweet lips"
As the bridge crew collectively shuddered at that name and the images it brought up, the captain leaned in closer to the grill.
"I thought I told you dont call me that in public, big boy. Now get up here!"
Studiously pretending eh had not heard that exchange Spock just kept rereading the script in his monitor wondering when the long day would end...
Spork In Yer Eyes Fic
The Enterprise shook as it took fire from the insanely huge and monstrously powerful alien vessel that looked real big n stuff.
"Uhura! Raise Hailing Frequencies! Get Me that ship Damnit!" Captain Kirk's voice was demanding and harsh against the battle sounds.
"I'm trying Sir, but they're not responding." Uhura's voice was as always just short of sultry mixed with panicked.
Spock almost audibly groaned, his headache growing larger as he watched all this human display of emotion.
He turned back to his displays as the Doctor's voice came over the intercom on schedule.
"Jim! What are you doing to this ship? I have half a sickbay full of people down here!"
"Not now Bones" Kirk cut off the Doctor's irate reply as he turned back forward.
"Sulu. Where are My weapons?"
"Inoperable Sir."
"Captain,"Uhura spoke up,"They are hailing us now."
"Put it on main screen"
"I am James t Kirk of the Federatio-"
"None Shall Pass!"
"...what?"
"None Shall Pass!"
"...We didnt want to pass-- we were going that way and you came from over there," Kirk said making gestures in widely different directions, "and we just were minding out own business before you shot My ship up!" Kirk's voice seemed to soar to a dramatic point at the end, and hung there breathless as the alien looked on, confused.
"...oh"
"OH? OH? Thats what you say after shooting My ship up?"
"Captain! Scott has restored main power to shields and weapons!"
"Good, Sulu! Fire all phasers!"
"what, now?"
"Did I stutter, Sulu?"
"Well, no Sir, but... they aren't exactly attacking now." Sulu's voice trailed off as he looked hopefully around the bridge for support, but the others were all studiously avoiding his gaze.
"Sulu..."the Captain's voice was steady and very very calm, and Sulu cringed."Do you really want a repeat of the Kenner episode?"
Spock watched all this with what in a human would have been called amusement and irritation.
Sulu shrunk into his seat remembering the episode of the cadet who had disobeyed the Captain and nearly gotten the ship destroyed. His voice came out strained as he answered,"No Sir"
"Then fire the Damn Phasers!"
The alien on the screen raised a hand and seemed to be ready to object to this, before saying, "Oh bugger" as his ship dissolved into a morass of light and sound
"There now, set us on a heading towards beta Seven"
"Yes Sir"
Suddenly the ship was rocked by a shuddering movement. and stopped.
"...all stop Sulu"
Sulu glanced at the captain, glanced at heir stopped position and then sighed and said,"All Stop, aye Sir" and turned off the engines.
Scotty's voice immediately sprang from the intercom.
"Sir! ye canna do this to my engines and expect them to hold together. I'm giving them all she's got!"
"...Scott."
"Aye Sir"
"How can you be giving them all she's got, when we are not moving?"
"...Scott out"
A Strange voice spoke into their heads even as a odd image of a man in flowing robes appeared.
"You have violated out rules of civilized combat and must be punished accordingly."
The captain distinctly heard from several mouths"oh no not again", as he flicked on the intercom.
"McCoy will you come up here and argue with a hideously powerful and annoying superbeing for me. its been a long day"
"Sure thing, sweet lips"
As the bridge crew collectively shuddered at that name and the images it brought up, the captain leaned in closer to the grill.
"I thought I told you dont call me that in public, big boy. Now get up here!"
Studiously pretending eh had not heard that exchange Spock just kept rereading the script in his monitor wondering when the long day would end...