Then: Surrender Or Die?
Strakov turned away from the guard who was once again mumbling into his headset, and straight at the screen full of Jawa Dephran High Council officials.
"Ahh there you are! Greetings from Frowar President Elect Sarogustov!"
"Greetings Lord Strakov!" A voice came through the speakers but Strakov could not determine which of thirty odd officials stood before him on the screen that it came from.
Strakov had never paid much attention to galactic politics throughout the years he had risen through the ranks of the military. It was a wonder he even new the name of the current President Elect on his neighbouring planet. It had only become something of importance in recent months following the bloody military coup that he had staged. The one in which he had successfully wiped out Frowars royal bloodline, and bizarrely taken the title of Lord upon his ascendance to power.
Almost as if it hadn't occurred to Strakov that he could now be King. In fact it wasn't that at all, it's just that to Strakov being a King seemed like a poncey title, whereas to Strakov the title of Lord was far more masculine.
Strakov played with his twirly moustache.
"Never mind the formalities," He said sharply, "I simply wish to issue you with an ultimatum!" This was the bit he was looking forward to the bit where he told them to "Surrender or Die!"
But a movement to his right caught his attention. At last! It was someone bearing tea! He grabbed the mug desperate for a quick sip.
He stopped staring at it in disbelief. "What's this?"
"Something wrong Strakov?" The Doctor thought it was high time he made his presence felt, and slowly made his way towards Strakov's chair.
Strakov had completely forgotten all about The Doctor and suddenly realised that the tray bearer was his companion, the one with the weak bladder.
"Where's the rest of my tea? This cup is half empty!"
"Or half full," The Doctor chimed in, "depending of course on your point of view…"
Digby just shrugged.
Lord Strakov looked at them both, "I've suddenly grown very tired of you two!" He declared, "Guard take them out to the launch site and have them tied to the missile we've primed for launching!"
"Is that wise Strakov?" The Doctor queried, "all that extra weight?"
"It could jeopardise the launch." Professor Grayvor's voice came timidly from behind his console.
At the mention of "missile" and "launch" the onscreen Officials of Jawar Dephra erupted into a chorus of panic.
Lord Strakov fished for a remote and hit "mute."
"Very well shoot them and bring me some more tea!"
The guard cocked his gun.
"Time for a refill!" The Doctor knocked Strakov's cup sending the now lukewarm liquid straight into the guards face. "Run Digby!"
The Doctor pushed past the guard and for once Digby was right behind him, still carrying the biscuits.
"Alert the guards!" Screamed Strakov "don't let them escape!"
Having rubbed the tea out of his eyes the guard suddenly noticed that his headset was missing.
*****
The Doctor and Digby had run through the courtyard and straight into the banquet hall. There was a strong smell of percolated coffee in the air.
"Ahh biscuits…" a distinguished looking guest snatched the plate off Digby.
Digby began to protest but the Doctor motioned him to stay quiet. He was now wearing the missing headset.
"Let's go," he said, "they're sending guards this way."
Digby snatched the biscuits back and followed The Doctor out into the kitchen.
*****
The President Elect of Jawa Dephra was desperately trying to negotiate, the other ministers and officials were either panicking, pleading, or trying to decide what to do amongst themselves.
Lord Strakov was still having difficulty discerning which one was The President.
"QUIET!" He boomed, "All of you except The President Elect sit down and shut up!"
Everyone did as they were told, to Strakov there appeared to be no one left standing.
"Is that better?" The President Elect's voice came from off screen.
"Where are you?" Strakov 's patience was wafer thin.
There were some bustling noises and two of the ministers produced an empty chair. A small man around three feet tall climbed up and stood on it.
"Is that better?" The President Elect asked again.
"er .. Yes," Replied Strakov somewhat put off his stride, "I'll keep this short…er I mean brief."
There was a moments awkward pause as The President Elect waited expectantly.
"My terms are simple Surrender or Die!" Strakov had finally got round to saying it, but the moment for dramatic pronouncements had passed and it sounded rather flat.
"Okay we surrender." The President Elect said simply.
Strakov hadn't expected this; he had gone to great lengths to build Argonite fuelled missiles, all tipped with biological weapons that were tried and tested on his own people. One of them was currently trained on the Southern side of Jawa Dephra and Strakov had been looking forward to launching it as a display of his superior firepower.
"You Surrender?" Lord Strakov asked making sure he hadn't misheard.
"Oh yes," replied the President Elect, "all things considered it seems the best choice, so what happens now?"
"Is this some kind of trick?"
"No really we surrender, I hereby rescind all power and acknowledge Frowardian authority."
"Well okay then," Lord Strakov seemed a little disappointed, "Thanks."
"No big deal" The little man replied, "As my last act of Parliament I will organise a parade in our capital to welcome your conquering troops, my astronomers tell me you have a space fleet currently orbiting our skies waiting to land."
Strakov acknowledged this with a nod.
"Shall I cancel the launch my Lord?" Professor Grayvor queried hopefully, he was a scientist not a fighter.
"Doesn't seem to be much need now…" Lord Strakov said dejectedly.
"Thank you Lord Strakov," The President Elect of Jawa Dephra, replied gratefully.
"There's no need to thank me," Replied Lord Strakov.
"Oh but on the contrary…"
"No" Lord Strakov cut him off a wicked gleam in his eye, "There really is no need you see because I'm going to give the order to launch anyway!"
*****
The Doctor and Digby managed to pass unnoticed through the kitchen; two guards were in hot pursuit.
"Halt or we fire!" One cried.
"Keep running!" The Doctor told Digby, "And stop eating those biscuits!".
They were approaching the work surface where the Head Chef was busily engaged in preparations for tomorrows inevitable spur of the moment soiree/banquet that Lady Strakov was bound to inform him she had just arranged.
After all why should tomorrow be any different?
The Doctor leapt up on one end of the table as a gun blast whizzed past where his legs would've been had he not moved. Digby followed after him and they both leapt over the Head Chef's shoulders. The Doctor on the right, and Digby on the left.
"Have you finished peeling those jerkers yet?" The head Chef screamed after them, as the guards leapt onto the table to follow.
The Doctor threw a food trolley into the path of the oncoming guards, he paused for a moment thoughtfully.
It was time to send a signal to Klarg.
The guards had negotiated the trolley and they would be ready to fire again at any moment. The Doctor took the butt of his Sonic Screwdriver and smashed it into a fire alarm by the nearest exit and dragged Digby out through the door.
They were back in the courtyard, surrounded by guards.
"Now what Doctor?"
"Quiet Digby I'm trying to listen." The Doctor had blocked his left ear in order to listen through the headset. A feat made more difficult by the clanging sounds of the fire alarm.
"Put your hands where I can see them!" Ordered one of the guards.
"They're about to launch the missile!" The Doctor exclaimed.
"You there take off that Headset!" The guard levelled his gun at the Doctor, "And you…" he looked at Digby, "give us those biscuits!"
The Doctor took off the headset with his right hand; his left still held his sonic screwdriver.
Digby reluctantly handed over the biscuits, his face full of crumbs.
There was a faint whirring whilst The Doctor squeezed his sonic screwdriver into the headset mike. The guards all flinched as sound was amplified to an excruciating level. Some of them dropped their guns.
"What are you doing Doctor?" Digby asked.
"Sending a signal!" The Doctor explained.
*****
Behind a large panel in Strakov's command centre a red light glowed on a small, silver one hundred and twenty eight megabyte mp3 player, that Digby's father had given him for his birthday.
*****
"What music did you have on your mp3 player?" The Doctor asked as he and Digby made their way through the pain stricken and helpless guards.
Digby shrugged, "Hip Hop mainly, but I lost it."
The Doctor snorted in disapproval, "Better start running again Digby."
They were nearing the palace gates and everywhere Digby looked guards were convulsed in agony, as amplified sonic waves pulsed through their bodies leaving them unable to control their movements.
"I can't hold them off much longer, not without inflicting permanent damage."
"Will they be alright?"
"Depends how you look at it," replied The Doctor as they made their way through the exit, "on the one hand they will no longer be under attack by sonic waves…"
"And on the other?"
The Doctor relaxed his grip on the Sonic Screwdriver, as Klarg's men came into view from amongst the surrounding forest.
"On the other hand they will be forced to listen to your music Digby! I'm sure they'll wish I never stopped!"
*****
"Something's jamming the signal!" Professor Grayvor exclaimed as the words "transmission failure" filled his screen.
"What?" Strakov sprang from his seat. "What is it? Where is it coming from?"
"I'm running a trace at the moment," Explained the Professor who was wearing a headset. "It appears to be sonic in nature…no wait, it's changing…"
Strakov pulled the headset and flicked the switch for the speakers; it was the only bit of machinery he knew how to work.
*****