Chao World: A Story
By Darkness The Hedgehog
Mr. Disclaimer, who is really a poorly disguised Eggman, says: Hey kids! Don't get severely drunk, do drugs OR attempt to take over a world where humanoid hedgehog-mutants can run faster than the speed of sound! It's impossible, I tell you!... AHEM! Anyway, Darkness doesn't own Sonic or Sega. He is in no way affiliated with them. All other characters used in this fic, other than a few that may be mentioned like Sunburn and Darkness, are also not owned by Darkness.
And now, Chapter 2:
Day 2: Eggman's POV:
Dear Evil Journal,
I have finally come up with the perfect plan... At least I HOPE It's perfect. After all, Omochao inspired it. Earlier today (It is 12 AM as I write this) he crashed into my head. He said he was "going to get some cream puffs from Yugoslavia". Sometimes I wonder about him. But anyway, that's when I realised my plan: If one idiotic robot Chao can give me a bump on my head, think how much damage an army of non- idiotic, non-robot Chao could do! Yes, that's right, an ARMY OF MALEVOLENT CHAO! And no one could bear to hit a cute little Chao. Mwahahahahahahaha! But I digress, I'm packing some weapons and heading to Chao World.
I'm here. It's shortly after 1 PM. After searching several hours I was unable to find a Chao Egg. And then I saw them. Sonic and Tails were playing with some baby Chao. Tails had a Red one that was turning into a hero-type I think (It's hard to tell with monotone Chao), and Sonic's was normal coloured and sort of dark in comparison. Sonic probably whacked it when it woke him up. He's not a morning person. Anyway, I didn't want to risk spoiling my cover, so I sent in Omochao (who was in my weapons case for some strange reason) to distract them. Meanwhile I searched the bushes, and after hours of searching (and Omochao landing on my head), found an egg in the lake. I took the easy route in hatching it: I threw it against the wall. It came out with a bizarre squiggly mouth. I named him Eggbert, and tried to subjugate him, but he kept whining and crying, and he didn't seem to be paying any attention to me, so I shook a tree for some of the hard fruits. If I couldn't use logic to rule over these creatures, force would do. But as I raised the fruit to throw it at Eggbert, he immediately stared at me and begged. These creatures were totally captivated by food! I held the food while lecturing him, and he at least seemed to get the picture: listen to me and you get the fruit. I gave him it. He then began crawling around aimlessly. Chao couldn't walk immediately after birth? No one would fear a little creature slowly crawling after them! My mission became clear: Find some way to power these Chao enough to walk erect at least. Then I would try to move on to flying, and then THE WORLD WLL BE MINE! Mwahahahahahaha...
Diabolically,
Doctor Ivo 'Eggman' Robotnik
Tails' POV:
Dear Diary,
I survived the night, and although Sonic hasn't been able to make Bolt any more heroic (which wasn't helped by the fact that Sonic has been dropping him a lot), Scarlet is quickly becoming kind and nice... to me. She's been pouncing on Sonic and hitting him, but that's another story. Anyway, after several failed attempts by Sonic to make Bolt run faster, I came up with an idea: what if there was some sort of power source that would make Chao more powerful, like a Chao's version of Chaos Emeralds. I went over to Angel Island, but Knuckles refused to lend me his emeralds. He's such a moron. When I came back, Omochao was buzzing around Sonic telling him things like "don't fall into bottomless pits, they're BAD!" Sonic and me threw him into the bushes randomly, and I swear I heard someone say "Ow!" Maybe the sandwich is back again! O_O NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!... Anyway, I left Sonic to take care of my Chao and went looking for alternative power sources. I was scouting Eggman's poorly hidden Egg Pyramid and destroying robots when I noticed something: they were powered by animals! I brought a few peacocks back to Chao World. When I got there, Scarlet was neutral again. Sonic said it wasn't his fault, and Sonic always tells the truth. I suspect the sandwich. I briefed Sonic on my plan to use animals, and he said he'd have to see it to believe it. I asked if he'd bet 500 rings on it, and he agreed. Surely enough, when I gave Scarlet the peacocks, she got a feathered tail and small wings. Sonic forked over the rings. Heh. Sucker. Sonic's ran off to get some baby cheetahs or something. It's currently 5 PM.
Happily,
Tails
Sonic's POV:
DAMNIT DIARY I HATE YOU!
It's 7 PM. I just got back from being mauled by a mother cheetah when I tried to take some of her babies to give Bolt. I knew I should have just gone with my plan to get some from that crappy Egg Pyramid. Anyway, after I got some cheetahs I came back and Tails made a wound-healing gadget out of tree bark and rocks, which set me on fire. I hate Tails' stupid gadgets. Why didn't he just bring some frikkin' tools and METAL with him?! Well, Bolt is a bit faster now, at least. Is still can't believe I'm out of rings. Damn mutant fox.
Cursedly,
Sonic the Hedgehog
[A/N: Sorry this isn't nearly as funny as the last one (in my opinion), but It's hard not being random, and after that comment I got for A Self- Insertion Into The Insane, I am sincerely attempting to show more un-random humour. Please R&R, and tell me if I should be more random in this fic or not, or if I should just entirely quit it. Even flames about crappy quality of this fic will be appreciated. And also, tell me if you like diary-format or not, and if not what format I should use for this story.]
By Darkness The Hedgehog
Mr. Disclaimer, who is really a poorly disguised Eggman, says: Hey kids! Don't get severely drunk, do drugs OR attempt to take over a world where humanoid hedgehog-mutants can run faster than the speed of sound! It's impossible, I tell you!... AHEM! Anyway, Darkness doesn't own Sonic or Sega. He is in no way affiliated with them. All other characters used in this fic, other than a few that may be mentioned like Sunburn and Darkness, are also not owned by Darkness.
And now, Chapter 2:
Day 2: Eggman's POV:
Dear Evil Journal,
I have finally come up with the perfect plan... At least I HOPE It's perfect. After all, Omochao inspired it. Earlier today (It is 12 AM as I write this) he crashed into my head. He said he was "going to get some cream puffs from Yugoslavia". Sometimes I wonder about him. But anyway, that's when I realised my plan: If one idiotic robot Chao can give me a bump on my head, think how much damage an army of non- idiotic, non-robot Chao could do! Yes, that's right, an ARMY OF MALEVOLENT CHAO! And no one could bear to hit a cute little Chao. Mwahahahahahahaha! But I digress, I'm packing some weapons and heading to Chao World.
I'm here. It's shortly after 1 PM. After searching several hours I was unable to find a Chao Egg. And then I saw them. Sonic and Tails were playing with some baby Chao. Tails had a Red one that was turning into a hero-type I think (It's hard to tell with monotone Chao), and Sonic's was normal coloured and sort of dark in comparison. Sonic probably whacked it when it woke him up. He's not a morning person. Anyway, I didn't want to risk spoiling my cover, so I sent in Omochao (who was in my weapons case for some strange reason) to distract them. Meanwhile I searched the bushes, and after hours of searching (and Omochao landing on my head), found an egg in the lake. I took the easy route in hatching it: I threw it against the wall. It came out with a bizarre squiggly mouth. I named him Eggbert, and tried to subjugate him, but he kept whining and crying, and he didn't seem to be paying any attention to me, so I shook a tree for some of the hard fruits. If I couldn't use logic to rule over these creatures, force would do. But as I raised the fruit to throw it at Eggbert, he immediately stared at me and begged. These creatures were totally captivated by food! I held the food while lecturing him, and he at least seemed to get the picture: listen to me and you get the fruit. I gave him it. He then began crawling around aimlessly. Chao couldn't walk immediately after birth? No one would fear a little creature slowly crawling after them! My mission became clear: Find some way to power these Chao enough to walk erect at least. Then I would try to move on to flying, and then THE WORLD WLL BE MINE! Mwahahahahahaha...
Diabolically,
Doctor Ivo 'Eggman' Robotnik
Tails' POV:
Dear Diary,
I survived the night, and although Sonic hasn't been able to make Bolt any more heroic (which wasn't helped by the fact that Sonic has been dropping him a lot), Scarlet is quickly becoming kind and nice... to me. She's been pouncing on Sonic and hitting him, but that's another story. Anyway, after several failed attempts by Sonic to make Bolt run faster, I came up with an idea: what if there was some sort of power source that would make Chao more powerful, like a Chao's version of Chaos Emeralds. I went over to Angel Island, but Knuckles refused to lend me his emeralds. He's such a moron. When I came back, Omochao was buzzing around Sonic telling him things like "don't fall into bottomless pits, they're BAD!" Sonic and me threw him into the bushes randomly, and I swear I heard someone say "Ow!" Maybe the sandwich is back again! O_O NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!... Anyway, I left Sonic to take care of my Chao and went looking for alternative power sources. I was scouting Eggman's poorly hidden Egg Pyramid and destroying robots when I noticed something: they were powered by animals! I brought a few peacocks back to Chao World. When I got there, Scarlet was neutral again. Sonic said it wasn't his fault, and Sonic always tells the truth. I suspect the sandwich. I briefed Sonic on my plan to use animals, and he said he'd have to see it to believe it. I asked if he'd bet 500 rings on it, and he agreed. Surely enough, when I gave Scarlet the peacocks, she got a feathered tail and small wings. Sonic forked over the rings. Heh. Sucker. Sonic's ran off to get some baby cheetahs or something. It's currently 5 PM.
Happily,
Tails
Sonic's POV:
DAMNIT DIARY I HATE YOU!
It's 7 PM. I just got back from being mauled by a mother cheetah when I tried to take some of her babies to give Bolt. I knew I should have just gone with my plan to get some from that crappy Egg Pyramid. Anyway, after I got some cheetahs I came back and Tails made a wound-healing gadget out of tree bark and rocks, which set me on fire. I hate Tails' stupid gadgets. Why didn't he just bring some frikkin' tools and METAL with him?! Well, Bolt is a bit faster now, at least. Is still can't believe I'm out of rings. Damn mutant fox.
Cursedly,
Sonic the Hedgehog
[A/N: Sorry this isn't nearly as funny as the last one (in my opinion), but It's hard not being random, and after that comment I got for A Self- Insertion Into The Insane, I am sincerely attempting to show more un-random humour. Please R&R, and tell me if I should be more random in this fic or not, or if I should just entirely quit it. Even flames about crappy quality of this fic will be appreciated. And also, tell me if you like diary-format or not, and if not what format I should use for this story.]