Author: Nat

Rating: PG13

Spoilers: I'm Australian and because we're so far behind I don't think it applies… besides, it's mostly AU anyways.

Pairing: Rory/Tristan

Standard disclaimer applies

A/N: Of course, first is my thanks to my betas Surya and Sus. Kisses kids!

And hey! Over 100 reviews for my first five chapters, that's so freaking exciting! I adore reviews, I love them, I worship reviewers!

'If you review it, she will write more.'

Enjoy!

- The Life and Times of an Unwelcome Third Wheel -

Nocturnal Emissions.

Until last night they had never been something to be concerned about.

That was last night though.

This morning I woke up, feeling good, feeling warm and wet.

It took a minute for the dream to slowly fade before the physical reality set in.

God.

How embarrassing. I wonder what he did when this happened. Does it still happen to him? I mean he has Rory now, so its not like he isn't having sex or anything right?

I got up and stripped the sheets off the bed. I didn't think the maid would say anything, but I still didn't want her to see it. I balled them up and put them in the hamper with my boxers. I'd never used so much soap in the shower before.

God!

Ok, so what's so embarrassing? All boys have them, right? So what if it was about Rory.

Hers were the first breasts I'd seen that weren't in a magazine or on one of Tristan's pornos. It wasn't something I did on purpose, but if they insist on getting naked every time they're behind closed doors then what can I do?

God!

I don't need those images in my head again.  I had a wet dream. So what if it was about Rory? She's always around, she's pretty, she's nice and she

STUPID BROTHER!

*

"Rory!" Rory turned from her locker to see Tristan running down the hall with a huge grin on his face, Jordan running behind him trying to grab him. "Ror, wait 'til you hear this!"

"What is it?" She smiled at Jordan who flushed and muttered at her.

"Hey."

"So this morning-"

"Don't Tristan." Jordan grabbed his arm.

Tristan started to laugh again and leaned back against Paris's locker. "It's too funny."

"What?" Rory looked from Tristan to Jordan.

Tristan was still gasping for breath when he pulled her ear to his mouth. "Jordan had his first wet dream. Want to know who it was about? You."

Rory's face flushed bright red. Jordan reached out and punched Tristan hard before stomping off. Rory followed suit.

"You're such a bastard Tristan." She slammed her locker closed before slapping his chest and walking away.

"What?" Tristan laughed as he followed her down the corridor. "It's hilarious!"

"No, it's embarrassing!" Rory walked into her homeroom leaving a grinning Tristan in the corridor.

Rory made it through the day, with minimal teasing from Tristan. Mostly because she avoided him like the plague. It was a shame she hadn't been able to avoid Jordan like that. Between every class she had run into him, once literally. He would mutter at her as both their faces flamed bright red.

End of the day and Rory felt like she was in remission. No more Tristan, no more Jordan, no more Paris.

Now she just had to survive the weekly dinner with her grandparents and a weekend with a sulking mother.  

Rory was sick of her mother's attitude. She hadn't been to Tristan's house for weeks. It was starting to grate on her nerves that her mother wouldn't acknowledge the efforts she'd made to get along better with her. But no, Lorelai was an expert sulker, and since Rory hadn't given into her every whim she was doing an excellent job of driving a wedge between the two of them.

Dinner at her grandparents was barely tolerable and Rory had gotten up half way through the main meal and left. The arguments, the sulking, the underhanded remarks had all added up to another fight, this time at the large dinning room table in front of Richard and Emily. Rory grabbed her bag and slammed the door behind her. She pulled out her cell phone and called Tristan.

"Yeah?"

"Tristan, can you come get me?" Rory was out the gate, her heels clicking on the sidewalk.

"You at your grandparents?"

"Not anymore."

"Where are you?"

Rory looked at the street signs. "I'm at the corner of Elm and Beechworth."

"Don't move, I'm five minutes away."

"That's quick."

"Yeah, well you know me, when it comes to you and-"

"Don't."

Tristan laughed at her through the phone. "Five minutes."

He hung up and Rory sat on the curb tucking her dress under her, drawing her knees to her chest.

His Mustang slid around the corner and came to a stop before her. She opened the door and flung her bag into the back.

"Where to?"

"Anywhere my Mother isn't."

"My place?" Rory didn't miss the apprehension in his voice.

"Sure." With a shake of his head he grinned over at her.

"You can read Jordan's journal with me. See what other dirty little things he's written about you in there."

"God, no. Didn't you notice the avoiding today?"

"I noticed, but it's still funny. Want to know what he has to say about Jessica and Christina?" He smirked at her.

"About who?"

"Your boobs."

"You named my breasts?"

"It's a habit I picked up somewhere." Tristan flashed his dimples at her.

"So, you named them after two bleach blonde ditz'? Gee, that's beyond flattering."

"Want to know what Jordan-"

"God, you're in an annoyingly good mood. Would you shut up about that already?"

Tristan pulled the car into the garage. "It's been an exceptionally good day."

"Even with me avoiding you?"

"You might have been avoiding me, but I was watching you, and all you managed to do was run into Jordan instead of me. I like seeing you flush red. Just like that." His eyes glittered teasingly as he looked at her and the familiar feeling of heat flowed up her neck and across her face.

Tristan opened the door and stepped back allowing Rory to enter in before him.

"Jordan." Tristan's voice was playful in response to seeing his younger brother walking up the stairs. "Got anything planned for the evening?"

"Why?" Jordan was slowly walking up the stairs, his voice wary.

"We're gonna watch a movie. Thought you might want to watch with us." Rory knew that no good could come from Tristan asking Jordan to do something with them, but what could she say? Jordan was smiling like he'd won the lottery.

"Sure."

Tristan nodded. "You guys get snacks and I'll set the movie up."

Rory stood outside the pantry while Jordan handed out the food as she asked for it.

"Popcorn?"

He pulled it out and handed it to her. "Check."

"Gummy Bears?"

"Check."

"Chocolate?"

"Check." Jordan backed out of the pantry and moved to the fridge. "What soda do you want?"

"Fanta."

"Okay." Jordan grabbed a few cans and closed the fridge with his foot. "Let's go."

Rory hadn't missed that he had been avoiding her eyes. "It's alright you know. The dream thing. No big deal."

He shrugged as they started up the stairs. "I know, it's just, embarrassing. I hate Tristan."

Rory grinned. "He does have a big fat mouth doesn't he? Well if it makes you feel better, Tristan still has them."

"Has what?"

"Wet dreams."

"Really? About who?" Jordan was starting to smirk.

"I can't tell you that!" Rory was blushing again.

"You huh?"

"God, you're almost as bad as he is. I'm not telling you."

They walked into the games room to find Tristan on the couch waiting for them with remote in hand. His face was trouble and Rory started to worry.

"Sit down get comfortable." Tristan gestured lazily at the couch. Jordan flopped into his usual chair after sitting the drinks on the coffee table and Rory sat on the edge of the couch, not touching Tristan. He flashed that smirk at her that said he knew what he was going to do would get him into trouble, but that he was going to do it anyway.

He pressed play and the video whirled and the TV screen went from blue to black. Blue lettering flashed up on screen.

'Wet Dreams 11' followed by even brighter blue writing. 'Barely Legal British Wenches.'

Tristan cracked himself laughing, Jordan stormed out of the room screaming that he hated Tristan and Rory jumped on Tristan trying to wrestle the remote out of his hands.

"God, you're such a bastard Tristan! Give me the remote, I am not watching a porno with you."

Tristan was too busy laughing to avoid the elbow he copped to the ribs as Rory turned the video off.

"That was perfect!" Tristan gasped for breath. "Did you see his face?"

"No, and if you don't stop teasing him about it, I'm going to tell him about your dreams about you handing in your math homework late."

Tristan sat up face devoid of any humour. "You wouldn't."

"I would."

"You are not a nice girl Rory Gilmore."

"You'd be getting exactly what you deserve." She grinned at him.

"I can think of a better way to shut me up." Tristan wormed his way closer to her.

"Oh really?"

Tristan leaned into her and licked her bottom lip. "Yeah. I can be the naughty school boy and you can be the teacher in leather."

Rory laughed and Tristan put his mouth to her neck and moved in for the kill.

*

STUPID BROTHER

God I hate him.

This morning, he came into my room, probably to tell me to hurry up if I wanted a lift. But then he noticed the sheets gone. He came over to me where I was sitting at my desk writing in here. He pulled it out of my reach not letting me even finish my sentence and manhandled me into the closet, leaning against the door so I couldn't get out.

He read what I had written aloud and started to laugh when he read the bit where I said it was Rory in my dream.

He then let me out of the cupboard and said I had 2 minutes to meet him at the car or I'd have to find another way to school. He smiled all the way there.

I finally asked him why he was still grinning and he said he had a surprise for Rory.

And I knew exactly what that surprise was.

The only thing that surprised me was that he didn't yell it down the corridor. But I figured that had more to do with Rory than me. He didn't give a shit if I was going to be embarrassed, but he didn't want Rory to be. Not in public anyway.

I saw him all damn day. And when I wasn't avoiding him I was running into Rory.

When they came in that night and Tristan asked me to watch the movie with them I figured it was because Rory had threatened him with something to make him be nice to me. So I said yes to watching the movie.

I should have known better.

I hope that he leaves the tape in the video player. I haven't seen that one.