Chapter Twelve
The pain and sorrow within me seethed and ate away at my insides like a monstrous plague. I felt hollow; empty, and the agony coursing from my wound only made matters worse.
I clung to his still-warm hand, praying that everything that had happened today was just a nightmare, but I knew the truth. A great weight fell on me as I wondered if I could have stopped Boromir's death. The guilt crept into my mind like a hidden beast, but the pain seemed to be fading...
Looking up a Aragorn, my vision began to blur. With my last bit of strength I rolled onto my back, and held the shaft of the arrow in my shoulder weakly with one hand. It was harder to breath, and then my vision and consciousness were robbed of me, sending me into a dark world of torment and grief.
.
My left hand was empty. I clenched it, trying to remember what I had been holding that was so important, and then it all came back to me. I choked a sob, and willed myself to sit up.
"El!" Aragorn called, pushing me forcefully back down. It was twilight, and Legolas and Gimli were nowhere to be seen.
"Where is Boromir?" I demanded, looking desperately around. Aragorn gently told me that Boromir's body had been placed in one of the boats, and sent down the falls of Rauros. "And Frodo and Sam?" I asked, already knowing the answer. Aragorn told me, and then said, "I have sent Legolas and Gimli on to track the Uruk Hai, while I stayed behind and tended to you."
His gaze glanced down, and I followed them to a thick, bloody arrow that looked horribly familiar.
"Why did I faint?"
Aragorn gave a small smile, "You lost much blood, but your unconsciousness masked the pain you would have otherwise endured had you been awake as I withdrew the arrow."
I exhaled heavily, and looked at my shoulder. Brown blood stained my dress in frighteningly large amounts, and the shoulder of the dress had been cut away so a banadage could be applied.
"How will we catch up with the others?"
"I am a ranger, and there are many ways." was his answer, "Now sleep, in the morning we must continue, even if I must carry you."
I lifted my face to the sky, looking at the foreign stars. My heart ached over everything that had happened, and an emotion I had not had much time to consider: homesickness.
I felt so detached from my homeland my heart throbbed with loneliness. I thought of my father, and my sister. I wonderd how much time had passed, and if they thought I was dead. I fell into a troubled sleep, only waking when Aragorn nudged me not-so-gently at the crack of dawn.
.
Aragorn, though he offered, refused to carry me, saying that to do so would slow us down, and that I hadn't been shot in the leg.
I countered with the argument that I would slow us down no matter what, but his mind was made up.
He sprinted along, while I forced myself into a half-jog, half-lurching run. Aragorn agreed to carry the bags we were left with, but I still felt as though I was carrying a great weight that bore down on me; whispering for me to give up, and collapse into an exhausted heap.
That day was sheer torture. As we ran through the forest and later across country, with no breaks, my heart ached more for the loss of Boromir, and it felt as though with every step I was losing hope in everything.
By nightfall, Aragorn finally halted, and touched his ear to the ground. He was silent for a long time, while my legs buckled, and I swallowed air as fast as I could empty my lungs. I was so tired it was a wonder I didn't keel over and die from fatigue.
Aragorn lifted his head, and offered me some of the food Celeborn had supplied us with. I munched hungrily on the dried beef, and nearly emptied my vessel of water. The ranger watched me closely- I felt his eyes on me as I ate, still panting, and regaining my strength.
"Forgive me, El," Aragorn started, "I should not have expected you to run all day with no rest, and in such a state. The error was mine, and shall not be repeated."
I smiled gratefully at him, but didn't speak. When he had asked forgiveness, I was transported to the day before, when Boromir had done the same. A lump grew in my throat. I bit my lip, and fell on my back, gazing at the cloud-choked sky. Every once in awhile, the clouds would thin, and the moon would shine feebly from behind them until a thicker cloud would pass over it.
The moon had light, but could not shine, and help those in the dark. I knew the outcomes of the story, but no one would listen to me. Feeling oddly proud of my prophetic-sounding metaphor, I continued on in my thinking, trying to find other connections. It cheered me to think that when the clouds dispersed, the moon could gleam down to the earth freely, and help all those who needed light.
I smiled tiredly. All I had to do was wait for the clouds to roll away. With this thought in mind, I fell asleep.
.
I woke up early to find Aragorn listening to the ground, his eyes closed in thought. While I waited patiently for him to sit up, I rubbed my right shoulder, trying to ease the pain.
When Aragorn finished his listening, he looked solemnly at me for a time. I grew uncomfortable, and looked around the landscape. Finally, he spoke, but when he did, I wished he hadn't.
"I have lost sound of the Uruk Hai's footfalls. They are far, far away, and our hope lies with Legolas and Gimli. El, forgive my next words, but your wound is keeping us from the Halflings."
I remained silent, feeling yet another weight fall upon me. Guilt crept further into my mind as I thought of Merry and Pippin with the horde of orcs. "El," Aragorn began slowly, "you cannot come with me."
My heart pounded faster, and now fear was added to the mix of emotions within me.
"I am sorry, but yesterday I had hoped to cover double the land, but I couldn't because of you. Do not think I don't regret it, El, because I know I will for the rest of my life if I never see you again. You must see it that your chances of survival alone are so much greater that Merry and Pippin's."
I nodded, trying to hold back the tears I knew were inevitable. Wordlessly, Aragorn began trading things from one bag to another, and then handed me my pack.
"There is enough food there to last you a month or so. If you head straight west, you will come to Edoras, the Hall of Theoden King. He will, I percieve, show you kindness and hospitality. Or you may retrace our path north, back to Lorien. You might even consider returning to where you call home."
I took the bag numbly, avoiding eye contact with Aragorn. My heart felt ponderous with sorrow, and a new horror of realization crossed my mind. I had no way to get home. As long as I couldn't explain how I was transported to Middle Earth, I had no way of knowing how to get back.
Aragorn stood, and offered me his hand. I refused, and clambored to my feet, heaving my bag on my left shoulder. I turned my back to the rising sun, and looked west. Edoras was my only hope of seeing the others again.
Aragorn turned me gently around to face him. For the first time that morning, I looked right into his eyes. It seemed to me that his eyes showed all the weight he carried of grief, guilt, and forlorness, and I saw his problems were so much worse than my own.
I instantly forgave him, if not in words, but in thought. I think he saw it on my face, because he gave a small smile. He lifted his hands to hold me on either side of the face, and kissed my forehead. Still smliling, he said, "Boromir was right about you."
I felt my own mouth form the first genuine smile I had given for days.
"Farewell, Eleanor Orthalion, may your path take you to whatever you desire." Aragorn wished, shouldering his own bag.
"I hope you find Merry and Pippin." I replied. Giving me one last look, Aragorn turned, and headed of north, his head down, watching the ground for marks.
I watched him until a hill divided us. Then I sat down and cried for a long time. Everything had gone wrong. I was lost, alone in a field of Middle Earth, and the three people I could connect with had been stolen from me.
After I had no tears left, I stood up. I felt strangly light, as though crying had eased the weight I carried. Hope reviving in me, I headed west, the sun shining warmly on my back, and with every step swelling that spark of hope.
.
By nightfall, the knolls of the Emyn Muil had vanished into the horizon, and I was completely surrounded by plains. I rolled out my blanket, and sat on it. I thought about what Aragorn had called me; Orthalion.
I wondered what it meant, and if it was a compliment. By recieving that name, I felt as though I had finally reached Aragorn. The brief time I had looking into his eyes, I understood him. Wasn't that just my luck? As soon as I made a bond with one of the fellowship, he left me, by his will or not.
Pulling out the book Galadriel gave me, I went to the pages of maps, trying to find where I was.
All the locations were labeled in Tengwar, so I had to guess where Edoras was. I knew it was by a mountain range, and found a dot in the coinciding with the requirements. I could only assume that I was somewhere at the third of the way mark.
I wished I could have gone with the others to find Merry and Pippin, and meet Treebeard. Heck, while I was wishing, I wished that Boromir was with me, that I could read Elvish, that my wound was healed, and I had a way of getting home.
But nothing comes from wistful thinking. I laid down, and waited for sleep to take me.
.
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.
No reviews from ch. 11. Need I say more?
The pain and sorrow within me seethed and ate away at my insides like a monstrous plague. I felt hollow; empty, and the agony coursing from my wound only made matters worse.
I clung to his still-warm hand, praying that everything that had happened today was just a nightmare, but I knew the truth. A great weight fell on me as I wondered if I could have stopped Boromir's death. The guilt crept into my mind like a hidden beast, but the pain seemed to be fading...
Looking up a Aragorn, my vision began to blur. With my last bit of strength I rolled onto my back, and held the shaft of the arrow in my shoulder weakly with one hand. It was harder to breath, and then my vision and consciousness were robbed of me, sending me into a dark world of torment and grief.
.
My left hand was empty. I clenched it, trying to remember what I had been holding that was so important, and then it all came back to me. I choked a sob, and willed myself to sit up.
"El!" Aragorn called, pushing me forcefully back down. It was twilight, and Legolas and Gimli were nowhere to be seen.
"Where is Boromir?" I demanded, looking desperately around. Aragorn gently told me that Boromir's body had been placed in one of the boats, and sent down the falls of Rauros. "And Frodo and Sam?" I asked, already knowing the answer. Aragorn told me, and then said, "I have sent Legolas and Gimli on to track the Uruk Hai, while I stayed behind and tended to you."
His gaze glanced down, and I followed them to a thick, bloody arrow that looked horribly familiar.
"Why did I faint?"
Aragorn gave a small smile, "You lost much blood, but your unconsciousness masked the pain you would have otherwise endured had you been awake as I withdrew the arrow."
I exhaled heavily, and looked at my shoulder. Brown blood stained my dress in frighteningly large amounts, and the shoulder of the dress had been cut away so a banadage could be applied.
"How will we catch up with the others?"
"I am a ranger, and there are many ways." was his answer, "Now sleep, in the morning we must continue, even if I must carry you."
I lifted my face to the sky, looking at the foreign stars. My heart ached over everything that had happened, and an emotion I had not had much time to consider: homesickness.
I felt so detached from my homeland my heart throbbed with loneliness. I thought of my father, and my sister. I wonderd how much time had passed, and if they thought I was dead. I fell into a troubled sleep, only waking when Aragorn nudged me not-so-gently at the crack of dawn.
.
Aragorn, though he offered, refused to carry me, saying that to do so would slow us down, and that I hadn't been shot in the leg.
I countered with the argument that I would slow us down no matter what, but his mind was made up.
He sprinted along, while I forced myself into a half-jog, half-lurching run. Aragorn agreed to carry the bags we were left with, but I still felt as though I was carrying a great weight that bore down on me; whispering for me to give up, and collapse into an exhausted heap.
That day was sheer torture. As we ran through the forest and later across country, with no breaks, my heart ached more for the loss of Boromir, and it felt as though with every step I was losing hope in everything.
By nightfall, Aragorn finally halted, and touched his ear to the ground. He was silent for a long time, while my legs buckled, and I swallowed air as fast as I could empty my lungs. I was so tired it was a wonder I didn't keel over and die from fatigue.
Aragorn lifted his head, and offered me some of the food Celeborn had supplied us with. I munched hungrily on the dried beef, and nearly emptied my vessel of water. The ranger watched me closely- I felt his eyes on me as I ate, still panting, and regaining my strength.
"Forgive me, El," Aragorn started, "I should not have expected you to run all day with no rest, and in such a state. The error was mine, and shall not be repeated."
I smiled gratefully at him, but didn't speak. When he had asked forgiveness, I was transported to the day before, when Boromir had done the same. A lump grew in my throat. I bit my lip, and fell on my back, gazing at the cloud-choked sky. Every once in awhile, the clouds would thin, and the moon would shine feebly from behind them until a thicker cloud would pass over it.
The moon had light, but could not shine, and help those in the dark. I knew the outcomes of the story, but no one would listen to me. Feeling oddly proud of my prophetic-sounding metaphor, I continued on in my thinking, trying to find other connections. It cheered me to think that when the clouds dispersed, the moon could gleam down to the earth freely, and help all those who needed light.
I smiled tiredly. All I had to do was wait for the clouds to roll away. With this thought in mind, I fell asleep.
.
I woke up early to find Aragorn listening to the ground, his eyes closed in thought. While I waited patiently for him to sit up, I rubbed my right shoulder, trying to ease the pain.
When Aragorn finished his listening, he looked solemnly at me for a time. I grew uncomfortable, and looked around the landscape. Finally, he spoke, but when he did, I wished he hadn't.
"I have lost sound of the Uruk Hai's footfalls. They are far, far away, and our hope lies with Legolas and Gimli. El, forgive my next words, but your wound is keeping us from the Halflings."
I remained silent, feeling yet another weight fall upon me. Guilt crept further into my mind as I thought of Merry and Pippin with the horde of orcs. "El," Aragorn began slowly, "you cannot come with me."
My heart pounded faster, and now fear was added to the mix of emotions within me.
"I am sorry, but yesterday I had hoped to cover double the land, but I couldn't because of you. Do not think I don't regret it, El, because I know I will for the rest of my life if I never see you again. You must see it that your chances of survival alone are so much greater that Merry and Pippin's."
I nodded, trying to hold back the tears I knew were inevitable. Wordlessly, Aragorn began trading things from one bag to another, and then handed me my pack.
"There is enough food there to last you a month or so. If you head straight west, you will come to Edoras, the Hall of Theoden King. He will, I percieve, show you kindness and hospitality. Or you may retrace our path north, back to Lorien. You might even consider returning to where you call home."
I took the bag numbly, avoiding eye contact with Aragorn. My heart felt ponderous with sorrow, and a new horror of realization crossed my mind. I had no way to get home. As long as I couldn't explain how I was transported to Middle Earth, I had no way of knowing how to get back.
Aragorn stood, and offered me his hand. I refused, and clambored to my feet, heaving my bag on my left shoulder. I turned my back to the rising sun, and looked west. Edoras was my only hope of seeing the others again.
Aragorn turned me gently around to face him. For the first time that morning, I looked right into his eyes. It seemed to me that his eyes showed all the weight he carried of grief, guilt, and forlorness, and I saw his problems were so much worse than my own.
I instantly forgave him, if not in words, but in thought. I think he saw it on my face, because he gave a small smile. He lifted his hands to hold me on either side of the face, and kissed my forehead. Still smliling, he said, "Boromir was right about you."
I felt my own mouth form the first genuine smile I had given for days.
"Farewell, Eleanor Orthalion, may your path take you to whatever you desire." Aragorn wished, shouldering his own bag.
"I hope you find Merry and Pippin." I replied. Giving me one last look, Aragorn turned, and headed of north, his head down, watching the ground for marks.
I watched him until a hill divided us. Then I sat down and cried for a long time. Everything had gone wrong. I was lost, alone in a field of Middle Earth, and the three people I could connect with had been stolen from me.
After I had no tears left, I stood up. I felt strangly light, as though crying had eased the weight I carried. Hope reviving in me, I headed west, the sun shining warmly on my back, and with every step swelling that spark of hope.
.
By nightfall, the knolls of the Emyn Muil had vanished into the horizon, and I was completely surrounded by plains. I rolled out my blanket, and sat on it. I thought about what Aragorn had called me; Orthalion.
I wondered what it meant, and if it was a compliment. By recieving that name, I felt as though I had finally reached Aragorn. The brief time I had looking into his eyes, I understood him. Wasn't that just my luck? As soon as I made a bond with one of the fellowship, he left me, by his will or not.
Pulling out the book Galadriel gave me, I went to the pages of maps, trying to find where I was.
All the locations were labeled in Tengwar, so I had to guess where Edoras was. I knew it was by a mountain range, and found a dot in the coinciding with the requirements. I could only assume that I was somewhere at the third of the way mark.
I wished I could have gone with the others to find Merry and Pippin, and meet Treebeard. Heck, while I was wishing, I wished that Boromir was with me, that I could read Elvish, that my wound was healed, and I had a way of getting home.
But nothing comes from wistful thinking. I laid down, and waited for sleep to take me.
.
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~
.
No reviews from ch. 11. Need I say more?