Disclaimer thingie: don't own stuff blah blah, except the rabbit and the tree kangaroo and the fairies and all their stuff. Yes it is ALL MINE HAHAAHHAA!
Oh yes it was a right good talking to, like none you have ever seen.
And once that was over and St John was reminded once again and this was his final warning, don't f@*k around with fluffy white bunny rabbits, especially ones with the name Bunny. Everybody looked at the book. Again.
Logan became impatient. He was sick of looking at the cover of the stupid damn book and wanted the rabbit to either open the damn book or throw it away. That muscle in his cheek twitched again.
"Soe," said St John "wot is it about?"
Bunny gave him a hard look.
"No, no mate I mean wot does it look like inside or sumthing?"
There was a pause for dramatic effect.
"It's a pop-up book," said Bunny grimly.
"Well wot is so bad about a pop-up book mate"
Bunny looked up from the brightly coloured and well illustrated volume at the mutants and her Sprit Guide Companion "This book is about what is going to happen, and because of it I now know where we are…"
There was another pause for effect which was made even more dramatic by the dramatic music that was now drifting through the air…
"The most abhorrent creation the bloody Fairies have made to date. Bedtime Story Land!"
DA DA DUMMMM!!!
This was not good, now there was going to be more crazy weird stuff and Logan was not looking forward to it. Maybe if he pinched himself he would wake up and this dream would all go away, yes that's right it's all a dream.
Johnny lent over and pinched him.
After the fighting had died down and everybody's wounds were patched up, Johnny explained that Logan was asking for it by thinking out loud, he had practically begged for it. Bunny solved the whole argument and slapped both of them.
Fortunately for them Bunny had a chance to think things through and despite the fact opening the book was probably the craziest thing to do, everybody there was nuts and in a place that makes no sense it is best at times just to give up and go along with it. Well it makes for a better story anyway.
So our intrepid heroes all sat down in a circle under the signpost and Bunny opened the book.
It was you could say your normal and quite ordinary pop-up book, the sort where you pull little tabs and stuff moves. Only it was about what Logan had gone through during the last few hours. Which was all very fine and well, except Johnny found some of the things that happened highly amusing, and his hysterical laughter was starting to hurt Logan's ears. That was until page 19, which just showed all of them sitting around under the sign which clearly showed that they were in Itdoesn'tmatteryourscrewedanyway.
They sat in silence; unlike on the other pages where the text was clear and even rhymed, the words were indistinct. It seemed that the story all pivoted on what they did next…
And so because Johnny was a messed up little freak, he pulled the little tab that nobody else had noticed (or if they had weren't in a million years going to admit it or even touch)…
On the horizontality of the book, two giant highlands rose up over the tiny cardboard characters below. One made of shards of twisted rock and ice that seemed to clutch storm clouds in its sky scraping claws. The other was a set of gentle giants, lightly wooded with acres blanketed by brilliant wildflowers and soft sunshine. Awww, it was so pretty that little Johnny looked about him but alas he couldn't see a thing, just a big empty plain that seemed to go on forever…
That was until the giant mountain ranges made of tortured rock and ice leapt up with a scream from the earth to the west of them, which shocked and angered the clear blue sky who sent down tornadoes, thunderstorms and great winds to help it up. The ground beneath them shook and rolled and as the dread steeps loomed over them, Bunny sat tapping her claws against the book in her lap, her head resting on one paw and a dark glint in her eyes.
"Settle down" she barked.
And sure enough the ground stopped what it was doing and shuffled back a little, Logan had his way with trees and shrubs, Bunny ruled… well Bunny just ruled, especially when she was cross I tell you that, nope you don't want to get on the wrong end of a bar fight with that fluffy rabbit.
The fellowship all stared as the lovely hills, you know the nice ones with the flowers and trees and stuff, blossomed to the east. You could hear the angel's chorus singing so sweetl….
"Shutup!" roared Bunny, and when a rabbit roars you listen.
The angels hurriedly packed up and left they too knew not to f@*k around with fluffy white rabbits.
Once everything had calmed down Bunny placed the book carefully on the ground, stood up on her hind legs and gave Johnny the finger. And no you meanies out there not The Finger as in 'flipping the bird', I mean the finger as in you make curling motions with your index finger when you want somebody to come, and yes I don't know what you call it or even if it has a name, but anyway I have explained it so you should get it now, if you don't well then you…well that isn't my problem.
And so Johnny came like the good boy he is, so curious and trusting. Johnny bent down wondering why the funny rabbit was going to share a secret with him.
Then Bunny grabbed him roughly by the ears and yelled in them.
After the yelling had stopped Johnny decided that it would be best if he didn't touch the book again. At least not when the rabbit was looking anyway…
Oh yes it was a right good talking to, like none you have ever seen.
And once that was over and St John was reminded once again and this was his final warning, don't f@*k around with fluffy white bunny rabbits, especially ones with the name Bunny. Everybody looked at the book. Again.
Logan became impatient. He was sick of looking at the cover of the stupid damn book and wanted the rabbit to either open the damn book or throw it away. That muscle in his cheek twitched again.
"Soe," said St John "wot is it about?"
Bunny gave him a hard look.
"No, no mate I mean wot does it look like inside or sumthing?"
There was a pause for dramatic effect.
"It's a pop-up book," said Bunny grimly.
"Well wot is so bad about a pop-up book mate"
Bunny looked up from the brightly coloured and well illustrated volume at the mutants and her Sprit Guide Companion "This book is about what is going to happen, and because of it I now know where we are…"
There was another pause for effect which was made even more dramatic by the dramatic music that was now drifting through the air…
"The most abhorrent creation the bloody Fairies have made to date. Bedtime Story Land!"
DA DA DUMMMM!!!
This was not good, now there was going to be more crazy weird stuff and Logan was not looking forward to it. Maybe if he pinched himself he would wake up and this dream would all go away, yes that's right it's all a dream.
Johnny lent over and pinched him.
After the fighting had died down and everybody's wounds were patched up, Johnny explained that Logan was asking for it by thinking out loud, he had practically begged for it. Bunny solved the whole argument and slapped both of them.
Fortunately for them Bunny had a chance to think things through and despite the fact opening the book was probably the craziest thing to do, everybody there was nuts and in a place that makes no sense it is best at times just to give up and go along with it. Well it makes for a better story anyway.
So our intrepid heroes all sat down in a circle under the signpost and Bunny opened the book.
It was you could say your normal and quite ordinary pop-up book, the sort where you pull little tabs and stuff moves. Only it was about what Logan had gone through during the last few hours. Which was all very fine and well, except Johnny found some of the things that happened highly amusing, and his hysterical laughter was starting to hurt Logan's ears. That was until page 19, which just showed all of them sitting around under the sign which clearly showed that they were in Itdoesn'tmatteryourscrewedanyway.
They sat in silence; unlike on the other pages where the text was clear and even rhymed, the words were indistinct. It seemed that the story all pivoted on what they did next…
And so because Johnny was a messed up little freak, he pulled the little tab that nobody else had noticed (or if they had weren't in a million years going to admit it or even touch)…
On the horizontality of the book, two giant highlands rose up over the tiny cardboard characters below. One made of shards of twisted rock and ice that seemed to clutch storm clouds in its sky scraping claws. The other was a set of gentle giants, lightly wooded with acres blanketed by brilliant wildflowers and soft sunshine. Awww, it was so pretty that little Johnny looked about him but alas he couldn't see a thing, just a big empty plain that seemed to go on forever…
That was until the giant mountain ranges made of tortured rock and ice leapt up with a scream from the earth to the west of them, which shocked and angered the clear blue sky who sent down tornadoes, thunderstorms and great winds to help it up. The ground beneath them shook and rolled and as the dread steeps loomed over them, Bunny sat tapping her claws against the book in her lap, her head resting on one paw and a dark glint in her eyes.
"Settle down" she barked.
And sure enough the ground stopped what it was doing and shuffled back a little, Logan had his way with trees and shrubs, Bunny ruled… well Bunny just ruled, especially when she was cross I tell you that, nope you don't want to get on the wrong end of a bar fight with that fluffy rabbit.
The fellowship all stared as the lovely hills, you know the nice ones with the flowers and trees and stuff, blossomed to the east. You could hear the angel's chorus singing so sweetl….
"Shutup!" roared Bunny, and when a rabbit roars you listen.
The angels hurriedly packed up and left they too knew not to f@*k around with fluffy white rabbits.
Once everything had calmed down Bunny placed the book carefully on the ground, stood up on her hind legs and gave Johnny the finger. And no you meanies out there not The Finger as in 'flipping the bird', I mean the finger as in you make curling motions with your index finger when you want somebody to come, and yes I don't know what you call it or even if it has a name, but anyway I have explained it so you should get it now, if you don't well then you…well that isn't my problem.
And so Johnny came like the good boy he is, so curious and trusting. Johnny bent down wondering why the funny rabbit was going to share a secret with him.
Then Bunny grabbed him roughly by the ears and yelled in them.
After the yelling had stopped Johnny decided that it would be best if he didn't touch the book again. At least not when the rabbit was looking anyway…