Disclaimer thingie: don't own stuff blah blah, except the rabbit and the tree kangaroo and the fairies and all their stuff, as well as George. And those Fluffy Duckies and Bunnies everyone is talking about! Yes it is ALL MINE HAHAAHHAA!
Chapter 12 – Sing-a-longs
And John was about right, once the group's log began moving happy cheerful music played in the background with the lyrics sung by cute little children or woodland creatures. And everyone was thoroughly sickened by it within a minute. But it had that horrible sticking in your head quality, which made it all the more maddening.
Bunny clapped her paws over her ears as soon as she discovered what the lyrics were.
She told the others to do the same.
Logan was glad to comply.
Then when everyone was nice and insulated from the noise the trouble really began to start. First the narrow tunnel widened out into a small grotto with smooth banks and then the log belted them in with the kind of seatbelts, which are specially designed to hold people down.
Secondly small fluffy animatronics duckies, bunnies and other assorted woodland creatures popped up from behind plywood cutouts of trees, bushes, shrubs and other objects in the scenery and danced.
The struggling, which had been fierce when the seatbelts first appeared, increased dramatically.
"Bad day, bad day." Muttered Logan as he tried to slash apart his bonds.
The ride continued, the woodland robots telling our heroes to share and wash their hands regularly, oh and how much fun it was to tell the truth and play nicely and fairly with friends. La la la!
"We… Must… Resist!" gasped Bunny. "Ignore… The… Song... Don't…Watch… Have… To… Talk… Like… This!"
"I wanna go home! I'll be good, promise!" cried Logan pitifully.
Snowy sobbed quietly in his seat, while Johnny rocked back and forth. Logan leaned forward and spoke into the rabbit's ear in a near panic.
"What th' f@*k are we gonna do?"
Johnny sat bolt upright and turned right around in his seat, "Bad words Logan!" His finger quivered accusingly at Logan.
Then he sat straight back down and continued his rocking.
Logan turned his attention back to the rabbit. Who looked at him and said… "Ride it out."
"Noooo!" screamed Snowy and Logan in unison.
"Its all we can do!" yelled Bunny. "They'll…" and she choked on the word… "Be waiting for us on the other end, its gonna be hard but we will have t' make a break for it then!"
Logan bit his knuckles in agitation and the tree kangaroo sobbed a little louder and offered prayer to anyone who was listening.
Johnny on the other hand was enjoying himself despite the fact he was surrounded by water in the form of pink lemonade. He sat and rocked himself, singing along with the woodland creatures and stroking his lighter.
The causal observer would notice that more and more round objects with spirals on them began to be featured in the scenery. These objects had a strange tendency to spin. And an even stranger tendency to draw the watchers attention and suck them into song.
It was only until Bunny realised that Snowy was mouthing along to the words that she ordered the small group to close their eyes and sing, preferably something that had nothing to do with what was going on around them, or taking a shower with grandma.
They tired to do something for Johnny, but he was most reluctant in co-operating.
"Damn!" snapped Bunny.
"What?" said Logan hoarsely, he couldn't remember his grandma but he had seen one of Charles' naked before. It had brought back unpleasant memories.
"I've lost him." She told him flatly as she snapped her fingers in his face.
"No!" cried Snowy. "Mate, mate look at moi, look at moi Johnny!" Snowy shook Johnny desperately.
Johnny stared blankly ahead with a faint smile on his face. Slowly he turned his head and fixed Snowy with a distant look.
"Yes mate, I can see yew. Do you want to play ladders and ladders with me, mate?"
Snowy's face registered fear.
"Ladders and ladders?" he said in confusion.
"Yes mate," said Johnny disjointedly, "it isn't nice to slide down snakes even if they are mean."
"O.K." Snowy turned away. He looked at the other two. "We've lost him." He said.
Snowy then climbed back into his seat and sat down.
Bunny looked at him. "Did you just climb out of your seat?" She said.
"I don't know." Replied the roo dazedly.
Bunny blinked, she leaned back toward Logan. "I think the kangaroo has almost lost it too." She whispered.
Logan gulped and nodded. It was all he could do to even shift in his seat, somebody who could just climb out of theirs had a little too much on their minds.
The rest of this strange journey on the Fluffy Duckies and Bunnies version of ethnic cleansing went along mostly like this:
"La la lalala lalalalala, la la lalala lalalalala!"
"No more please no more!"
"I'll do anything, I know I'll, I'll stop harassing Girl Scouts that what I'll do!"
*Sounds of sobbing*
"…Sharing, fairing, That's what friends do when they're caring…"
Followed by more screaming, crying, yelling, teeth gnashing and general self-loathing.
Logan did a good part of them all. It was a dark, dark time.
Especially with Johnny singing along and asking if they were there yet.
Until there was hope.
Snowy blinked blearily. "Do ahie shee a light at dee endh of this tunnel maate? He slurred.
Bunny lifted her eyes. "Only if you see one." She rasped.
"Yay." Said Logan in a low voice.
"I wouldn't celebrate, I'd say that that light is more of a flamethrower." She growled sullenly.
The others that were still 'sane' if you want to call them that, couldn't help but agree.
They felt even worse when Johnny jumped up and cried "Oh goodie mates! We're here, this is gonna be bonza!"
Chapter 12 – Sing-a-longs
And John was about right, once the group's log began moving happy cheerful music played in the background with the lyrics sung by cute little children or woodland creatures. And everyone was thoroughly sickened by it within a minute. But it had that horrible sticking in your head quality, which made it all the more maddening.
Bunny clapped her paws over her ears as soon as she discovered what the lyrics were.
She told the others to do the same.
Logan was glad to comply.
Then when everyone was nice and insulated from the noise the trouble really began to start. First the narrow tunnel widened out into a small grotto with smooth banks and then the log belted them in with the kind of seatbelts, which are specially designed to hold people down.
Secondly small fluffy animatronics duckies, bunnies and other assorted woodland creatures popped up from behind plywood cutouts of trees, bushes, shrubs and other objects in the scenery and danced.
The struggling, which had been fierce when the seatbelts first appeared, increased dramatically.
"Bad day, bad day." Muttered Logan as he tried to slash apart his bonds.
The ride continued, the woodland robots telling our heroes to share and wash their hands regularly, oh and how much fun it was to tell the truth and play nicely and fairly with friends. La la la!
"We… Must… Resist!" gasped Bunny. "Ignore… The… Song... Don't…Watch… Have… To… Talk… Like… This!"
"I wanna go home! I'll be good, promise!" cried Logan pitifully.
Snowy sobbed quietly in his seat, while Johnny rocked back and forth. Logan leaned forward and spoke into the rabbit's ear in a near panic.
"What th' f@*k are we gonna do?"
Johnny sat bolt upright and turned right around in his seat, "Bad words Logan!" His finger quivered accusingly at Logan.
Then he sat straight back down and continued his rocking.
Logan turned his attention back to the rabbit. Who looked at him and said… "Ride it out."
"Noooo!" screamed Snowy and Logan in unison.
"Its all we can do!" yelled Bunny. "They'll…" and she choked on the word… "Be waiting for us on the other end, its gonna be hard but we will have t' make a break for it then!"
Logan bit his knuckles in agitation and the tree kangaroo sobbed a little louder and offered prayer to anyone who was listening.
Johnny on the other hand was enjoying himself despite the fact he was surrounded by water in the form of pink lemonade. He sat and rocked himself, singing along with the woodland creatures and stroking his lighter.
The causal observer would notice that more and more round objects with spirals on them began to be featured in the scenery. These objects had a strange tendency to spin. And an even stranger tendency to draw the watchers attention and suck them into song.
It was only until Bunny realised that Snowy was mouthing along to the words that she ordered the small group to close their eyes and sing, preferably something that had nothing to do with what was going on around them, or taking a shower with grandma.
They tired to do something for Johnny, but he was most reluctant in co-operating.
"Damn!" snapped Bunny.
"What?" said Logan hoarsely, he couldn't remember his grandma but he had seen one of Charles' naked before. It had brought back unpleasant memories.
"I've lost him." She told him flatly as she snapped her fingers in his face.
"No!" cried Snowy. "Mate, mate look at moi, look at moi Johnny!" Snowy shook Johnny desperately.
Johnny stared blankly ahead with a faint smile on his face. Slowly he turned his head and fixed Snowy with a distant look.
"Yes mate, I can see yew. Do you want to play ladders and ladders with me, mate?"
Snowy's face registered fear.
"Ladders and ladders?" he said in confusion.
"Yes mate," said Johnny disjointedly, "it isn't nice to slide down snakes even if they are mean."
"O.K." Snowy turned away. He looked at the other two. "We've lost him." He said.
Snowy then climbed back into his seat and sat down.
Bunny looked at him. "Did you just climb out of your seat?" She said.
"I don't know." Replied the roo dazedly.
Bunny blinked, she leaned back toward Logan. "I think the kangaroo has almost lost it too." She whispered.
Logan gulped and nodded. It was all he could do to even shift in his seat, somebody who could just climb out of theirs had a little too much on their minds.
The rest of this strange journey on the Fluffy Duckies and Bunnies version of ethnic cleansing went along mostly like this:
"La la lalala lalalalala, la la lalala lalalalala!"
"No more please no more!"
"I'll do anything, I know I'll, I'll stop harassing Girl Scouts that what I'll do!"
*Sounds of sobbing*
"…Sharing, fairing, That's what friends do when they're caring…"
Followed by more screaming, crying, yelling, teeth gnashing and general self-loathing.
Logan did a good part of them all. It was a dark, dark time.
Especially with Johnny singing along and asking if they were there yet.
Until there was hope.
Snowy blinked blearily. "Do ahie shee a light at dee endh of this tunnel maate? He slurred.
Bunny lifted her eyes. "Only if you see one." She rasped.
"Yay." Said Logan in a low voice.
"I wouldn't celebrate, I'd say that that light is more of a flamethrower." She growled sullenly.
The others that were still 'sane' if you want to call them that, couldn't help but agree.
They felt even worse when Johnny jumped up and cried "Oh goodie mates! We're here, this is gonna be bonza!"