Disclaimer: I do not own Final Fantasy VIII, or any of the related characters. Damn.

Note: I am so sorry that I haven't posted any new chappies. Life has been a chaotic mess lately. Well, some of it has been fun evil, dirty grin Heh heh. NO! I am not a slut! Me a virgin.  Yes, yes. ^ v ^ Also, I don't condone suicide, or self-mutilation.

Chapter 9: Everyone Has a Dark Side Revised

Squall: Dammit, why can't they just leave me the hell alone?!

Selphie: …Squall (she sits on her feet next to him)…Squall?

Squall (turns to her): ….What now?

Selphie: … (falls crying into his arms) I… know what you are going through…sorta. When Trabia was bombed….I couldn't think that I could live any longer… I was all-alone. That's when I started cutting…

Squall: Holy shit.

Selphie (grabs onto him tighter): …I know you have. I saw your wrists, and walked in on you in the shower accidentally one day…

Squall: So that was you

Selphie: I saw the other cuts. One was kinda new. Not that I was looking, or anything! Irvy would cry if- don't tell him! Please, Squally!?

Squall: If you don't call me "Squally."

Selphie (smiles): Okay.

Squall: And you let go.

Selphie (realizes she hasn't let go yet): ...(smiles) Sorry! Well, here. (hands Squall a journal with pink, and orange frills, and pictures of Moombas drawn all over it.)

Squall: What the f-?

Selphie: Open it up.

     Squall opened the front cover, and revealed a large picture of…Irvine wearing nothing except his rifle, and a bow of bullets beside his tanned body. Squall cringed out of embarrassment, and horror. Selphie looked, and noticed she was accidentally bearing all of Irvine to her helpless friend.

Selphie: Eek! Sorry! I forgot that was in there. He looks pretty hot, huh?

Squall: …

Selphie (takes the photograph, and places it in her black, lacy bra): Oh, sorry. Well, okay. Look now.

Squall: Shit.

     The second cover was revealed, and it was black with morbid phrases written over it in black glitter. "F^@% the world," was the nicest one on it. The thought of Selphie writing these was a shock to Squall, and he stared in disbelief. The always happy Selphie had a hidden dark side. She was the last person you would have thought would be capable to do this.

Selphie: I know… You never thought that I was like this, huh? Irvy kinda knew, but he didn't know what to do. No one did. Don't judge a book by its cover, or a girl by her behavior. Well, I wrote a lot of poems, and such in it. Maybe there are a few that you could relate to. If you need anyone to talk to, or something, I'm here. I won't tell you what to do when you come like everyone else. People don't seem to realize that their attempts to relate when they can't just make it worse. I guess I kinda am, but we are kinda the same. For different reasons though. I still…. cut…(about to burst into tears) I won't tell you to stop. I think that should be your decision. I would be a hypocrite if I told you not to, huh? Well, here I am babbling on. What do you want to talk about? Rinoa? Cid? Edea? Ellone?

Squall: …I don't want to talk…

Selphie: Oh…well, I am always here. ….I guess…I'll go inside now (goes to door).

Squall: …Thank you.

Selphie (grins): You're welcome. Just don't let anyone see it, k?

Squall (nods, she enters the house): ….(reads)

     Entry 1: Life sucks. I hate this bitch of a f@#$ing world… So many of my friends are dead… But, I can't let this upset me…Well, I can't let anyone see this upset me. Squall already is about to crack, and everyone else is too. This is terrible. Terrible Trabia. I'll call it T.T. from now on. I need to put you away. Irvy's coming. I guess I can't write what's really going on in my head right now…maybe later…

     Entry 2: Dammit. Why can't everyone just leave me the f^@%ing hell alone?! I want to slit my wrists, and get it all over with. Maybe I will….I still can't write freely in you. Irvy almost found you. I wish he'd stop snooping around in my room. He says it's for my own good. Like that I won't O.D. on something. He still hasn't found my stashes of my dirty little things. He'd freak. Maybe he'd have the doctor hospitalize me…I can't have that….Maybe I should end my pain tonight after I have dinner with him. I'll sneak the knife into my room, and stuff.

     Squall slammed the book down. He felt stupid not realizing that she was going through the same thing to a degree. He never realized that she was really hurting too. She always acted so… happy….so cheerful. He had always liked, and hated that about her. No matter what, she was the cheerleader of the group. Always… Selphie….

     Squall stood up, and let the light breeze whip the hair around his face. He'd fake happy, and maybe everyone would leave him the hell alone. They'd think he was better, and let him figure it all out by himself. He couldn't think straight with everyone hounding him almost every second to make sure he was okay. Of course he wasn't, but that didn't matter. They should have just let him be…

     His blue eyes seemed to burn  a flicker of red as he turned to go inside. The click of his heels against the concrete showed a sign of self-assurance, and he decided to get going. He was about to open the door, when he remembered the book. He slipped it in the back of his pants, and pulled his leather jacket down to cover it. No one would notice it.

     The figure that seemed to entrance him before, stood quietly by the corner, and watched him walk in. She shed a tear of glass, or perhaps even ice, and darted towards her refuge of water. To see him like this caused her pain. He was lying to everyone, and not being true to himself. But as she ran, she grabbed her chest. The teardrop shaped necklace around her frail neck glowed black, and her eyes flashed dark yellow, and black. Her metamorphosis was beginning.

Note: Yeah, I know that Selphie's journal wasn't that morbid. I don't know how far I can take it. I don't want to get in trouble. Maybe I will let it all out later. Also, the weird water chick is important, although her part is kinda lame right now. My brain cells are on the fritz right now, so my writing is kinda crappy. I know this chapter sucks. But oh f$%^ing well! Tee hee.

New Note: Well, the revised probably isn't any better. I'll fix it again later. Maybe…. It's really getting on my nerves…. Grrr….