Chapter 2: The Meeting
The studio Chrissy was dragged into was dark, with people running around blindly bellowing orders. Someone bumped into her and she stumbled.
"watch it!. what show are you talking about? Why do you need me? I am so confused."
"This way!" the assistant declared pointing toward the stage. "Oh," she said absently, "haven't you seen it? Know that Celebrity? Come on, it's been on for ten years!" She continued dragging Chrissy.
"Sorry but no"
"You're kidding! Damn. OK well three fans of a chosen celebrity come on the show and are asked questions about that celebrity. Whoever knows the most gets to spend a day with the celebrity. We had 3 fans but one didn't show up so you're taking her place."
"What?! Are you kidding? I don't know anything about any celebrities! I'm going to make a fool out of myself!"
"Oh come on, you'll be fine. EVERYONE knows something about Jeremy Sawyer."
"Who?"
"Oh my gosh. Haven't you seen, or even heard of, Lake's End? It was the most popular movie of last year!"
"Oh! Yeeeaaa........no."
"Oi!"
And with that parting phrase, Chrissy was pushed onto a brightly lit stage surrounded by a crowd of screaming onlookers. In the middle sat two people. One was a mid-fifties, slightly obese woman dressed in a dress, hat, scarf, and every other garment you could think of, all bearing the face of Jeremy Sawyer.
To the right of her sat a man, who, though not quite as emphatic, was dressed way to well to be considered perfectly straight. He sat with a look of surreal glee on his face. The woman, on the other hand, was sewing Jeremy's face onto a sock.
"Hi," Chrissy said nervously.
"Hi!" drawled the woman in a heavy southern accent, "I'm Melinda Sawyer."
"Sawyer?"
"Yeah. I'm married to Jeremy Sawyer."
"Riiiiiight. I see," said Chrissy as she took her place.
"OK! Is everyone ready?" announced the host, a man in his middle fourties with a terrible toupee.
"YES!" bellowed the audience.
"OK then let's bring out our celebrity! Jeremy Sawyer, come on out!"
Emerging from the side door came Jeremy. Chrissy gaped. He was identical to.
"Let's introduce our contestants!"
"First up, we have Melinda Saw.. we have Melinda Sawyer, everyone!" the host said with a puzzled expression on his face.
"Next we have Bobby Brown!" Bobby smiled and waved.
"And lastly we have Birch Gertrude Howard! Welcome Birch!"
"Excuse me," Chrissy started, "My name is Chris."
"Let's begin!" declared the host.
Chrissy shrunk back in horror. Birch? Jeremy would think she was such an idiot. For though she did not really know who he was, he was still handsome and completely available. She glanced in his direction and her eyes met his. He winked. She blushed and looked away.
Jeremy sighed. A good look at his first two fans confirmed his worst fears. Why did it always happen like this? There's the obsessed housewife, whose knowledge of one's personal life can be scary as hell, and the gay one. Did they realize that Jeremy was completely straight? "Damn," he sighed in resignation.
And then out of the corner of his eye he saw another fan pushed on stage. Well, she didn't look like a normal fan. For one thing, she was beautiful!
"Thank you Lord!" smiled Jeremy. He was thrilled that finally the show's producers could think of him for a change.
"Jeremy! You're on!" shouted the director.
He put on his smile and stepped out onto the stage. The host introduced the three contestants. Birch? He smiled when she tried to correct him. At least he wasn't so dense as to see that that was not her real name. He looked at her and winked. He understood.
Maybe this won't be such a bad day after all thought both Chrissy and Jeremy.
"First question! To Melinda. What is Jeremy's favorite color T- shirt?"
"Blue!" shouted Melinda, waving her arms excitedly. "Hi Jeremy! I'm Melinda! I've seen all you're movies and I abolsolutely ador."
"Next question!" interevened the host.
"This one goes to Birch!" Chrissy stared blankly ahead. "Birch! Birch are you with us?"
"OH! Oh yes sorry, sorry, yes that's me," replied Chissy, her embarrassment now complete. It couldn't get much worse than this.
"What is Jeremy's favorite kind of soda?"
Maybe it could.
"Sprite?" asked Chrissy, puzzled.
"I'm sorry Birch, that was an easy one. Everyone knows it's." he waited for the other two to fill in, which they did with an emphatic, "Diet A&W Root Beer!"
Does that even exist? Thought Chrissy, staring bewildered at the host.
The look on the third contestant's face gave away that something was amiss. Jeremy could tell that she wasn't meant to be there, but this amused him. She seemed like a very good person to go along with such a ridiculous show. His curiosity mounted to extraordinary heights. He was determined to meet this girl.
The studio Chrissy was dragged into was dark, with people running around blindly bellowing orders. Someone bumped into her and she stumbled.
"watch it!. what show are you talking about? Why do you need me? I am so confused."
"This way!" the assistant declared pointing toward the stage. "Oh," she said absently, "haven't you seen it? Know that Celebrity? Come on, it's been on for ten years!" She continued dragging Chrissy.
"Sorry but no"
"You're kidding! Damn. OK well three fans of a chosen celebrity come on the show and are asked questions about that celebrity. Whoever knows the most gets to spend a day with the celebrity. We had 3 fans but one didn't show up so you're taking her place."
"What?! Are you kidding? I don't know anything about any celebrities! I'm going to make a fool out of myself!"
"Oh come on, you'll be fine. EVERYONE knows something about Jeremy Sawyer."
"Who?"
"Oh my gosh. Haven't you seen, or even heard of, Lake's End? It was the most popular movie of last year!"
"Oh! Yeeeaaa........no."
"Oi!"
And with that parting phrase, Chrissy was pushed onto a brightly lit stage surrounded by a crowd of screaming onlookers. In the middle sat two people. One was a mid-fifties, slightly obese woman dressed in a dress, hat, scarf, and every other garment you could think of, all bearing the face of Jeremy Sawyer.
To the right of her sat a man, who, though not quite as emphatic, was dressed way to well to be considered perfectly straight. He sat with a look of surreal glee on his face. The woman, on the other hand, was sewing Jeremy's face onto a sock.
"Hi," Chrissy said nervously.
"Hi!" drawled the woman in a heavy southern accent, "I'm Melinda Sawyer."
"Sawyer?"
"Yeah. I'm married to Jeremy Sawyer."
"Riiiiiight. I see," said Chrissy as she took her place.
"OK! Is everyone ready?" announced the host, a man in his middle fourties with a terrible toupee.
"YES!" bellowed the audience.
"OK then let's bring out our celebrity! Jeremy Sawyer, come on out!"
Emerging from the side door came Jeremy. Chrissy gaped. He was identical to.
"Let's introduce our contestants!"
"First up, we have Melinda Saw.. we have Melinda Sawyer, everyone!" the host said with a puzzled expression on his face.
"Next we have Bobby Brown!" Bobby smiled and waved.
"And lastly we have Birch Gertrude Howard! Welcome Birch!"
"Excuse me," Chrissy started, "My name is Chris."
"Let's begin!" declared the host.
Chrissy shrunk back in horror. Birch? Jeremy would think she was such an idiot. For though she did not really know who he was, he was still handsome and completely available. She glanced in his direction and her eyes met his. He winked. She blushed and looked away.
Jeremy sighed. A good look at his first two fans confirmed his worst fears. Why did it always happen like this? There's the obsessed housewife, whose knowledge of one's personal life can be scary as hell, and the gay one. Did they realize that Jeremy was completely straight? "Damn," he sighed in resignation.
And then out of the corner of his eye he saw another fan pushed on stage. Well, she didn't look like a normal fan. For one thing, she was beautiful!
"Thank you Lord!" smiled Jeremy. He was thrilled that finally the show's producers could think of him for a change.
"Jeremy! You're on!" shouted the director.
He put on his smile and stepped out onto the stage. The host introduced the three contestants. Birch? He smiled when she tried to correct him. At least he wasn't so dense as to see that that was not her real name. He looked at her and winked. He understood.
Maybe this won't be such a bad day after all thought both Chrissy and Jeremy.
"First question! To Melinda. What is Jeremy's favorite color T- shirt?"
"Blue!" shouted Melinda, waving her arms excitedly. "Hi Jeremy! I'm Melinda! I've seen all you're movies and I abolsolutely ador."
"Next question!" interevened the host.
"This one goes to Birch!" Chrissy stared blankly ahead. "Birch! Birch are you with us?"
"OH! Oh yes sorry, sorry, yes that's me," replied Chissy, her embarrassment now complete. It couldn't get much worse than this.
"What is Jeremy's favorite kind of soda?"
Maybe it could.
"Sprite?" asked Chrissy, puzzled.
"I'm sorry Birch, that was an easy one. Everyone knows it's." he waited for the other two to fill in, which they did with an emphatic, "Diet A&W Root Beer!"
Does that even exist? Thought Chrissy, staring bewildered at the host.
The look on the third contestant's face gave away that something was amiss. Jeremy could tell that she wasn't meant to be there, but this amused him. She seemed like a very good person to go along with such a ridiculous show. His curiosity mounted to extraordinary heights. He was determined to meet this girl.
