Disclaimer: Linkin Park owns "Numb."

Note: I will change the prophesy's crow to raven. Don't wanna get in trouble by saying "The Crow" so, it's The Raven now. My old school mascot was a raven. Dammit, maybe I should have left it as the Crow. I hated that school...

*'s will show what Tinsir's thinking, k? I don't have Micro Word, so I can't save it as a web page, sooooo, I can't upload the italics, and such. 'Tarry

The later part of this chapter is serious. Some of me went into it, so be nice. I don't cut, and I don't condone it, nor want anyone else to do it. So don't. Don't cut. If anyone needs someone to talk to, I'm here. I won't judge you. So don't report me, or anything, please.

Chapter 64: Numbed From The Inside Out

Tinsir looked out at the horizon, standing on the balcony. She rubbed her growing stomach with her finger tips, deep in thought.

*Maybe this world isn't worth saving... Maybe it is beyond all hope... People kill, and die needlessly. Squall will die one day, and I will be left.... alone... Dewn will start aging soon, and she will be Ultimecia. her own father, and friends will kill her... But why did she not say anything? About her heritage, and such? Will she simply not care, or was she longing to die? Even Dewn...*

Tinsir had a chill run up her spine when she thought of the death of her child, he sweet Dewn. She wrapped the misty black shawl around her shoulders tighter, and leaned against the door frame.

*Dewn... Why will you hate the world, and long to destroy it? My child, why?! ... What will turn you bitter? ... And as for my sisters... I will get my revenge. You hurt Squall, and Dewn, and me. You hurt the world, but I am glad that you three did not die in the War of the Heavenlies. No... You shall all die by my hand. That is one of the few reasons I yet live. To kill... Bane of my existence, and of man, Hades shall fall as well. Damn him to the Abyss for his crimes. Wait... The child born unto him was a girl as well... It is in his power to resurrect the dead, and my Hyne.... Ultimecia may be his... "Pain, and sorrow on her lips, time shall tremble at her beckon call. She shall be born unto the Dragon, and shall try to compress time itself. She shall make war with the Lion, and the others, and lose. Lo, she shall give power unto the Raven upon as Death grows nigh."*

Soon a small voice was heard running up the halls, and her bedroom door swung open. Dewn ran to her mother, and Squall stood in the doorway holding her bag. He shrugged, and entered, quietly shutting the door behind him.

Dewn: Mommy!

Tinsir: Hey, kiddo.

Squall: She knows I know.

Dewn: What is it?

Tinsir: Don't know yet.

Squall: Dewn...

Dewn: We wanna find out. Okay?

Tinsir: Did he put you up to this?

Squall: No.

Tinsir: Well, let's wait. We can wait a couple days, or whenever.

Squall: Okay, I do want to know. We won't tell you.

Dewn: (winks) Yeah.

Tinsir: Hmmm. Lemme think.... No.

Dewn: C'mon!

Tinsir: When did you learn slang?

Dewn: Unckie Monkey Zell taught me.

Tinsir: I don't even want to know how he got the name.

Squall: ...

Dewn: You see, one day he-

Squall: Dewn.

Dewn: 'Tay.

Tinsir: Go unpack, and say hello to Aunt Ellone.

Squall: Go see Selphie too. All we heard at breakfast was how she wanted to see you.

*I'm bring another child into this hell hole of a world... Poor Dewn has known it all too well, and now he, or she will too. Hyne, what am I to say. Nothing? This is... terrible. I hate being here, and now I'm sending an innocent child into the world I despise. I'm such a hypocrite.*

Squall: What's wrong?

Tinsir: Nothing.

Squall: ... How are you feeling?

Tinsir: Fine.

Squall: Something's wrong. What is it?

Tinsir: I'm fine.

Squall: You have that look on your face that everyone accuses me of having.

Tinsir: Do I look that bad (laughs).

Squall: Whatever.

Tinsir: Dewn's grown taller.

Squall: I know.

Tinsir: ... Her curse is dissipating.

Squall: Is that what's bothering you?

Tinsir: ...Yeah...

Squall: You're lying. What's really bothering you?

Tinsir: After you.

Squall: What is that supposed to mean?

Tinsir: I meant that I'll tell after you say what's been bothering you.

Squall: (sigh).......... I don't think I'll make a good father.

Tinsir: (laughs) ...

Squall: What?

Tinsir: THAT'S your problem? Babe, you'll be fine. Just a tad caught off guard, but you're not Laguna, or any other person if that's what's bugging you. You are sensitve, and caring once you let your guard down.

Squall: Laguna? He never was a real father to me.

Tinsir: You mean he never earned the priviledge to be called "Dad."

Squall: Yeah.

Tinsir: You will.

Squall: You said I'll be dead. How am I supposed to be a dad if I'm a ghost?

Tinsir: Ooooooh, so now we're getting to the root of things. You're afraid of being like Raine is to you to our child.

Squall: The dead don't make good parents.

Tinsir: She was one. When she was alive, and if she were her she'd tell you to shut the hell up, and act like an adult. (laughs) I can remember one night she told Laguna to stop actinglike a child, and chased him around the house. Ellone, and I about died of laughter.

Squall: I could only think what he did to piss her off.

Tinsir: It was all in fun... (deep breath) I know of a way to save your life, and the others'. Don't ask. I shant tell.

Squall: Is it sacrificing our baby?

Tinsir: No! Agh! What made you think that?!

Squall: The look in your eye. You don't want to do it.

Tinsir: All things in life worth saving are retained in the road less longed for. But... I shall do what is needed of me.

Squall: Don't do anything I'll regret living for, or you will regret doing.

Tinsir: No, I shant regret it. Fear was in my eyes, not cold feet in my boots.

Squall: Tinsir... Don;t do it if you'll be hurt.

Tinsir: No, I will not be hurt. I will be redeemed.

*My Voel, what is needed will only worry, and hurt you. Your tears shall not stain your face yet. I will do what I need to nevertheless, and you shall remain on the Earth for many years. *

Squall: That look is in your eyes again.

Tinsir: Really? Maybe your should distract us from our thoughts.

Squall: Us? You split again?

Tinsir: No, I'm still whole. Us, as in baby, and me.

Squall: How?

Tinsir: There are a few ways... (smirks)

Squall: ....?

_+_+_+_+_+_+_+_+

Selphie (in the connecting living room): Squall, whate ARE you doing?

Dewn: Dad?.... (blink blink)

Squall: .........(glare)......... I'm getting a henna tatoo.

Selphie: Um, like why the garb? Or should I say lack of it?

Squall: She wants it all over my body. We ran out the green stuff.

Selphie: Do you want me to go get it? I don't want you out in public like that. It'll give all of us a bad name.

Squall (sarcastic): Thank you for your support.

Selphie: ^v^ Anytime

Squall: Whatever.

Irvine (walks out if his bedroom, and walks back a couple steps after he sees Squall): What the-?

Selphie: Language.

Irvine: What they heck?

Squall: Tinsir.

Irvine: Da- (sees Selphie) -rn.

Squall: You, and everyone else are next. I think it has to do with a ritual. (shows my symbol on his back)

Irvine: ...yeah... Um, do we have to?

Squall: Would I be looking like this otherwise?

Irvine: I want Selph to do mine.

Squall: Ah, damn, she is using magic.

Tinsir: No, I'm not. I'm going to later though after baby.

Squall: So why am I wearing this now?

Tinsir: It'll take a while to do everyone. Good grief, it took me two hours just to do you, and I'm not even done yet!

Squall: ...

Selphie: Is differnent colors okay?

Tinsir: Um, Selph, henna os green. I guess I can add coloring, but I'm not sure what will happen.

Selphie: Um, will orange ketchup work?

Tinsir: No.

Selphie: Darn.

Tinsir: Mmmm, hashbrowns with green ketchup. (I actually did that once at school, and grossed out my friends. the said it looked like snot)

Squall: That's sick.

Tinsir: I could have said blood, and guts in the morning.

Squall: I am numb to that. I packed your organs, remember?

Tinsir: You didn't actually touch them.

Dewn: Mommy had an operation?

Tinsir: No, when I had to eat people, sweetie.

Dewn (bloodthirsty): You mean when you had to consume the organs of hapless victims.

Others: O_O

Tinsir: ^__^ Yeah

Dewn: Cool.

Others: @______@

Tinsir: ^v^ Tasty, but not cool since it was human.

Dewn: Ah, the garbage can meat.

Tinsir: -_- Yeah.

Squall: Are you sure she's mine?

Tinsir: Your past incarnation's.

Squall: Did I ever-

Tinsir: Yep. You ate human once.

Squall: Why?

Tinsir: There was a rumor that if you ate the brains of a man, you gained his wisdom.

Squall: And?

Tinsir: You ate the previous incarnation of Irvine's brains.

Squall: Oh...

Selphie: Is that sanitary? He's got a dirty mind.

Irvine (tickled Selphie): Hey!

Tinsir (reflecting): He did get indigestion. And threw up a lot. He found out never to eat brains again.

Squall: Any other stories I need to know about?

Tinsir: ...Once you bathed in lion's blood.

Squall: Do I want to know why?

Tinsir: ....No.

Squall (thinks): I was a moron...

Tinsir: I got a kick out of it?

Squall: Did it work?

Tinsir: ....(smirks) I guess you could say it did.

Squall: Oh, Hyne....

Tinsir: Sure you don't want to know?

Squall: I'm sure. (Thinks: Damn sadist.)

Tinsir: Well, anyways, since you vehemently oppose the use of maguc right now, I will wait until two days after I give birth to consume the unretrieved power.

Squall: Thank you.

Selphie: Oh, Tinny, I need to talk to you later, k?

Tinsir: It's Tinsir. Repeat after me TINSIR. And of course I will.

Selphie: Okay, five?

Tinsir: Sure.

Squall (whispers): No cutting.

Tinsir: ..... (glare) F--- off.

Squall: ...

Tinsir: Fine. For now. But after, there is nothing you can do to stop me.

Squall: ....

Dewn: What are they talking about?

Selphie: I don't even want to know...

Squall: Selphie, can you please take Dewn, and Irvine away for a few moments?

Selphie: Sure. C'mon guys (the three leave)

^^^^^^"Numb"^^^^^^

I'm tired of being what you want me to be

Feeling so faithless lost under the surface

Don't know what you're expecting of me

Put under the pressure of walking in your shoes

(Caught in the undertow just caught in the undertow)

Every step that I take is another mistake to you

(Caught in the undertow just caught in the undertow)

^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^ Squall: What the f---ing hell is your problem?

Tinsir: Maybe I don't have the option of killing myself really, and I have no outlet for my rage. Did that ever cross that mind of yours? Dammit, I can't go on a f---ing murder spree, and can't kill myself yet. ALSO, I find pleasure in it. Everything that's wrong in my life slips away with my blood. Leave me the hell alone.

Squall: You can't do this anymore. It's only hurting you, and our child.

Tinsir: (scoffs) You think that I'd put our child at risk? Dammit, it's fine. There is always plenty of bllodflow going to it, and such. I'm not harming it in any way. My body isn't like your species. I can friggin' be on the human brink of death, and be fine. I regenerate too damn easy.

Squall: There's the chance you're wrong though.

Tinsir: ... That child means the world to me. It, and Dewn, and you. I would not put any of you at risk.

Squall: I didn't say that you knew it could harm it. I'm saying it could, so you shouldn't.

^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^ [Chorus]

I've become so numb I can't feel you there

I've become so tired so much more aware

I'm becoming this all I want to do

Is be more like me and be less like you

^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^

Tinsir: Dammit, leave me alone.

Squall: No. I've backed off too many times. You, and Selphie need to get over this. It's only hurting you.

Tinsir: Until you have actually cut, you have no clue what it's like. So get off my back. It's not hurting anyone, so leave it alone.

Squall: I know you have been thinking about using that dagger. Don't. Also, it is hrting someone. You, our child, and me.

Tinsir: You?

Squall: Gawd, yes. You have any f---ing clue what it's like on my end? Like I've failed you in some way. I'm not good enough to keep you happy.

Tinsir: It has nothing to do with you.

Squall: Look, I know it does over something that happened years ago. It started because of us. And you don't think I never cut? I did when Rinoa cheated on my the first time. But I quit. You need to.

^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^ Can't you see that you're smothering me

Holding too tightly afraid to lose control

Cause everything that you thought I would be

Has fallen apart right in front of you

(Caught in the undertow just caught in the undertow)

Every step that I take is another mistake to you

(Caught in the undertow just caught in the undertow)

And every second I waste is more than I can take

^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^

Tinsir: You have no clue what it's like in my head, so stay out!

Squall: Deluge?

Tinsir: Duh.

Squall: Stop cutting.

Tinsir: For a while. Then leave me the hell alone.

Squall: Stop for good.

Tinsir: I answer to no one, so why should I to you?

Squall: Becuase I love you, and you love me.

^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^ [Chorus]

I've become so numb I can't feel you there

I've become so tired so much more aware

I'm becoming this all I want to do

Is be more like me and be less like you

^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^

Tinsir: (falls to her knees) (cries) It takes away the pain... Why do you want me to hurt?

Squall: (gets on knees, and holds her) I don't want you to hurt. Let me help you feel better.

^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^ And I know

I may end up failing too

But I know

You were just like me with someone disappointed in you

^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^

Tinsir: There's nothing you can do.

Squall: It's been getting harder to feel better hasn't it? You've had to cut deeper, and longer gashes, haven't you?

^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^ [Chorus]

I've become so numb I can't feel you there

I've become so tired so much more aware

I'm becoming this all I want to do

Is be more like me and be less like you

^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^

Tinsir: ...Y-yes.

Squall: Let me help.

Tinsir: You can't...

Squall: I can try.

Tinsir: I can't feel anymore. Every time I'm happy, I'm just faking it. Let me feel better!

Squall: I love you too much to let you do this anymore.

Tinsir: ...(sobs)

^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^ [Chorus]

I've become so numb I can't feel you there

Tired of being what you want me to be

I've become so numb I can't feel you there

Tired of being what you want me to be

^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^