Sorry about the delay. I actually have over seven chapters done, but my Microsoft Word screwed up after our computer was wiped, so now I have to re-type everything. The things I do for you people.
~~~
Chapter Three: Big Fat Lights
Tuesday arrived witout many people noticing, except the ones whose birthdays happened to fall on a Tuesday.
Bik the Package Delivery Guy was not one of those people.
He'd been entrusted with a very special box, in which a very special thingy lay in styrofoam-peanut-lined care. It was bound with several rolls of duct tape and placed carefully in the back of his delivery van, which Bik was currently driving in order to deliver the box to a certain skool a few miles west.
Little did he know, he wasn't going to make it. In fact, he didn't know much of anything, so I guess it serves him right.
Bik the Package Delivery Guy whistled as he drove. Not only was he blissfully unaware of what day it was, he was equally ignorant of the unspeakable horrors that were yet to come. Plus he was whistling off-tune. He spotted something in his rearview mirror. It looked like a glowing patch of grease. At first he was mesmerized by its shininess, but then he broke free of its spell and tried to wipe it off with his sleeve. Not only did it stay there, but it grew larger.
Bik shook his head. Maybe the mirror was broken. He watched, fascinated, as the bobbing light loomed in the glass and suddenly swerved up beyond the mirror's field of vision. A few seconds later, something landed on the roof of the cab.
Bik didn't notice the thump. Weird, he thought. That light had almost looked like an alien spacecraft of some kind. But he ignored it and resumed whistling happily.
Suddenly he heard a voice coming from somewhere near the top of the cab. "OooooOOOOooh!!" it squealed with metallic glee. "Styrofooooaaaam..."
Then the entire roof was ripped off like the lid of the last can of tuna in a room full of psychotic hobos armed with can-openers. A little robot was perched on what remained of the cab holding the jagged piece of metal as if it were no more than a square of tinfoil.
"WeeeHEEEEeeeeeEEE!!" the droid screamed. "Must retain heat for BURITOOOOO!!!"
Before Bik could protest, or even stop whistling, GIR had him rolled up in the cab's roof like a steamy beany treat. The van swerved left and right and finally flew off the road, Zim's spaceship following right behind. Zim screamed into his headpiece:
"Get the teaching package, GIR!! WE MUST HAVE THE PACKAGE!!!"
The delivery van was heading for a sudden drop in the terrain. Zim panicked, not because GIR was in any kind of danger (which he wasn't), but because he needed the contents of that box intact. He shouted some more. "The package, GIR! DON'T LET IT FALL TO A CLIFFY DOOOOOM!!!"
His calls apparently went to no avail as the van's wheels hit air and kept going, but he spotted a tiny figure clawing its way into the back of the vehicle just before it went over. He watched in apprehension, hovering in the VootRunner, and after a few seconds a giant fireball lit up his windshield.
F O O O M ! ! !
Zim admired its foominess, then grew slightly worried. Where was GIR?
A smoking droid popped its head over the lip of the cliff. Zim immediently swooped down to pick him up. "Well?! WHERE IS IT??!! I must gaze upon the innards of that box!!" he cried, antennae quivering with anticipation.
GIR opened his head lid and reached inside. Zim leaned forward, red eyes glowing in the heat of Bik the Package Delivery Guy's firey demise.
The robot reached in... and produced a handful of charred styrofoam packing peanuts.
"Ooookee dooky!!" he said proudly. "I have what we came here for!" He popped the peanuts into his mouth a giggled insanely.
Zim sat very still. GIR noticed his master wasn't happily chowing down on burned styrofoam and sensed someting was wrong. "Oooo.... boxy! Righteeeee-o!"
GIR pulled the box out of his head, not understanding how Zim could possibly choose cardboard and duct tape over the sheer foamy goodness of packing peanuts. Now Zim was holding the box high in the air, cackling madly as the ship set itself to Autopilot and flew them back home. He didn't even bother to disguise them as they passed a family of three below. GIR could hear their conversations:
"Mommy! Daddy!! Look up at the sky! It's those THINGS on that video that had those things on them! AWFUL, TERRIBLE THINGS!!" Whimpering now. "Don't let them come and steal my brainmeats right out of my skull, Shmee!"
"Honey, who is that loud child in the back? And have you seen my pill? I think I dropped it somewhere around here... and where am I?"
"Shut up, both of you!! If anyone wants me to pull over, they're welcome to GET OUT RIGHT NOW. ....That means you, Todd."
GIR rubbed his metal stomach and thought about the good old days when he'd hijacked delivery vans and rolled people up in big pieces of metal. Ahhh. Nice warm nostalgy feeling.
The VootRunner sped off into the darkness. The darkness of impending DOOM.
~~~
Review or meet Bik's untimely end.
~~~
Chapter Three: Big Fat Lights
Tuesday arrived witout many people noticing, except the ones whose birthdays happened to fall on a Tuesday.
Bik the Package Delivery Guy was not one of those people.
He'd been entrusted with a very special box, in which a very special thingy lay in styrofoam-peanut-lined care. It was bound with several rolls of duct tape and placed carefully in the back of his delivery van, which Bik was currently driving in order to deliver the box to a certain skool a few miles west.
Little did he know, he wasn't going to make it. In fact, he didn't know much of anything, so I guess it serves him right.
Bik the Package Delivery Guy whistled as he drove. Not only was he blissfully unaware of what day it was, he was equally ignorant of the unspeakable horrors that were yet to come. Plus he was whistling off-tune. He spotted something in his rearview mirror. It looked like a glowing patch of grease. At first he was mesmerized by its shininess, but then he broke free of its spell and tried to wipe it off with his sleeve. Not only did it stay there, but it grew larger.
Bik shook his head. Maybe the mirror was broken. He watched, fascinated, as the bobbing light loomed in the glass and suddenly swerved up beyond the mirror's field of vision. A few seconds later, something landed on the roof of the cab.
Bik didn't notice the thump. Weird, he thought. That light had almost looked like an alien spacecraft of some kind. But he ignored it and resumed whistling happily.
Suddenly he heard a voice coming from somewhere near the top of the cab. "OooooOOOOooh!!" it squealed with metallic glee. "Styrofooooaaaam..."
Then the entire roof was ripped off like the lid of the last can of tuna in a room full of psychotic hobos armed with can-openers. A little robot was perched on what remained of the cab holding the jagged piece of metal as if it were no more than a square of tinfoil.
"WeeeHEEEEeeeeeEEE!!" the droid screamed. "Must retain heat for BURITOOOOO!!!"
Before Bik could protest, or even stop whistling, GIR had him rolled up in the cab's roof like a steamy beany treat. The van swerved left and right and finally flew off the road, Zim's spaceship following right behind. Zim screamed into his headpiece:
"Get the teaching package, GIR!! WE MUST HAVE THE PACKAGE!!!"
The delivery van was heading for a sudden drop in the terrain. Zim panicked, not because GIR was in any kind of danger (which he wasn't), but because he needed the contents of that box intact. He shouted some more. "The package, GIR! DON'T LET IT FALL TO A CLIFFY DOOOOOM!!!"
His calls apparently went to no avail as the van's wheels hit air and kept going, but he spotted a tiny figure clawing its way into the back of the vehicle just before it went over. He watched in apprehension, hovering in the VootRunner, and after a few seconds a giant fireball lit up his windshield.
F O O O M ! ! !
Zim admired its foominess, then grew slightly worried. Where was GIR?
A smoking droid popped its head over the lip of the cliff. Zim immediently swooped down to pick him up. "Well?! WHERE IS IT??!! I must gaze upon the innards of that box!!" he cried, antennae quivering with anticipation.
GIR opened his head lid and reached inside. Zim leaned forward, red eyes glowing in the heat of Bik the Package Delivery Guy's firey demise.
The robot reached in... and produced a handful of charred styrofoam packing peanuts.
"Ooookee dooky!!" he said proudly. "I have what we came here for!" He popped the peanuts into his mouth a giggled insanely.
Zim sat very still. GIR noticed his master wasn't happily chowing down on burned styrofoam and sensed someting was wrong. "Oooo.... boxy! Righteeeee-o!"
GIR pulled the box out of his head, not understanding how Zim could possibly choose cardboard and duct tape over the sheer foamy goodness of packing peanuts. Now Zim was holding the box high in the air, cackling madly as the ship set itself to Autopilot and flew them back home. He didn't even bother to disguise them as they passed a family of three below. GIR could hear their conversations:
"Mommy! Daddy!! Look up at the sky! It's those THINGS on that video that had those things on them! AWFUL, TERRIBLE THINGS!!" Whimpering now. "Don't let them come and steal my brainmeats right out of my skull, Shmee!"
"Honey, who is that loud child in the back? And have you seen my pill? I think I dropped it somewhere around here... and where am I?"
"Shut up, both of you!! If anyone wants me to pull over, they're welcome to GET OUT RIGHT NOW. ....That means you, Todd."
GIR rubbed his metal stomach and thought about the good old days when he'd hijacked delivery vans and rolled people up in big pieces of metal. Ahhh. Nice warm nostalgy feeling.
The VootRunner sped off into the darkness. The darkness of impending DOOM.
~~~
Review or meet Bik's untimely end.
