Note: I have written this damn chapter 3 times! I go to save it, and it freezes wierd, and stuff. All other versions have gone into the expanse of nothingness in my computer. May they rest in peace.

Chapter 73: Stings of Regret

Tinsir stood by the french doors to the balcony, taking in a deep breath. She held it, and turned around to face Laguna, letting the air escape her chest.

Tinsir: I went to Dollet about twenty years ago. Wakened from my slumber, I searched for food, and a life. I found neaither, and searched the sxpanse of the world. I found myself near Winhill one afternoon, wet, cold, and afraid. A woman saw me, and took pity on me. She took me in, and we became friends. That woman was Raine.

She saw in me hope, and potential I suppose. I learned the ways of her village, and slew monsters in exchange for human food, and a bed to sleep on. By this time you had gone off to rescua Ellone, and the Sorceress War still raged on. In the nights, the Latisha half of me sought food. Human flesh to satisfy my carnal appetite. Battle field lay across the lands, and there was no short supply of corpses.

But cold flesh was not suited for my tastes, and soon warm flesh filled my senses. I killed those that had allied with Adel, the monster he was. One night I slew a whole squad of men, Ravem (yes, it's w/ a m, and not a n)Almasy its leader. I slew his brigade befoer his eyes, and he hated me. I never got around to him, another squad coming as reinforcement.

I have the inate ability to heal, and had begun cutting myself since my stay in Dollet. I was in the process of hling myself after such a mutilation, an dshe walked in on my regeneration. She knew I was a sorceress right away, and in terror kicked me out.

However, she was good at heart, and looked for me. She found me on the Winhill plains, and I explained everything ot her from the beginning... She helped me get over some things, and helped me heal my broken spirit.

Soon Raine helped me in the arts of magic, and she found out she was with child. Ellone was sent back to her, and Squal was born not too long after... She helped me with some things as well that happened at that time... She was a good friend... my only true friend... Don't get me wrong, Selphie, and the others are my friends too, but they're different... I miss her...

A year or so passed, and Ravem came back, with a new brigade, and Odine items. He had a warrant for my arrest, or assassination from the president of Esthar- Laguna Loire. All sorceresses were to be either killed on the spot, or returned to Esthar for public sealing, or execution. Raine died trying to save me.

I took Squall, and Ellone to Centra to Edea, once a priestess to Odin, after I broke free from their ship. I will not say what cruelties were done to us. Ravem is a cruel man, Laguna... I can't help but feel part of it is my doing. And what I did in retaliation is no better that what he did unto us. After I left the children under Edea's care, I searched for Ravem. I hated him so badly, I made terrible choices. I lost myself in my rage for quite some time.

I stole his son Seifer away, not being able to slay the child, or his mother. I couldn't kill Ravem either, it wasn't a terrible enough punishment for Raine's life, my suffering, and the harm done to the children. I *snarls* hated him. Seifer was taken to the orphanage, and that's how they came to be there. I will say how the others came to the orphanage if you wish.

Laguna: Whoa... that's a lot to digest... Um, sure.

Tinsir: Selphie's mother commited suicide after her father died in the war. Irvine's father ran off to dodge the draft in Galbadia. He never was seen again, and his mother was left without means to support her child. So she gave him up for his own good. Quistis's parents were both military leaders, leading small bands of rebels against Adel. Both died bravely in combat. Zell... his parents were orginally from Esthar. They fled the country, only to die just after they crossed the border. They died happily, but sad for thier child.

I found all of them, and took them to Edea, and Cid. I hoped... that if I helped other people's children, that my own would be treated kindly... The whole karma thing I guess...

Laguna: ..... Raine died... because of us... She died for you, and because of a careless stroke of my hand... The pen truly is mightier than the sword...