Darth Revan's Flying Circus
"Part 5"
Announcer: AND NOW!! Challenging our champion, the Unknown Stranger, is another newcomer to the Taris Dueling Arena. A droid of all things, made by our very own machine master Twi=lek.........HE IS.........T3!!!!!!
(The crowd is cheering loudly as both duelists enter the arena. Revan is holding two lightsabres, each one showing off an eery violet glow. Silently, T3 rolls out.)
Announcer: LET THE BEST...er...man? No, er....BEING WIN!!!
Revan: This is too easy. YAAAAAAAR!!!
*BLAM!!! BOOM!!!! PLOOP!! CLOP!!! PACHING!!*
(Later, on the ship, Revan is in a full-body cast, laying on a bed. The rest of the Ebon Hawk=s group is watching a rerun of the fight on TV.)
Jolee: Hey Revan, they say parts of your fight are too violent for TV!
Revan: Mmph..mmm.. phmm....MMPH!!!
*((Goddamn $&^#%%&@ DROID!))
(T3 rolls up next to Revan.)
T3: Beep beep beep meep ching beep ching.
*((Shut up and eat your banana.))
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Darth Bandon: And now for something completely different!
(A giant jawa steps on him. Fade to black.)
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
(Carth, Juhani, and Jolee are seen walking through the desert of Tantooine.)
Juhani: How is it that the Ex-Dark Lord of the Sith got her ass handed to her so utterly and entirely by a sissy droid like T3?
Carth: I think HK had been tinkering with him before the fight.
Juhani: No, HK's been missing for a week now. Remember, Revan sent him after Griff.
Carth: Ohhhhh, right.
Jolee: T3 was still a little angry about being hired out as a garbage can.
(While walking, they pass by Bandon, who is hung over a campfire, surrounded by a bunch of Jawas. Juhani seems to be the only one who notices it. Suddenly, they spring to action, diving on Bandon. After a minute, all that is left is a skeleton.)
Juhani: ......I'll be seein= those things comin= at me in my sleep...
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
(On a foreign planet, HK is walking through the plains. Suddenly, a bottle hits his head. He bends over, and finds a note inside, and reads it.)
Note: To whoever may be reading this. I, Lady Feastius, am in deep need of rescuing. I am at the large wooden castle by the creek. Thankyou.
HK: Mayhap Griff is the culprit... I AM OFF!!
(Later, HK arrives at the wooden castle, a large sign is outside, reading AWedding Today@, and there is a large line of guests at the door.)
HK: HAVE AT THEE, MEATBAGS!!
(And soon, blaster shots were fired off everywhere. Maids carrying drinks were blown away. Butlers carrying food, likewise, were blasted in the face repeatedly until they stopped twitching.)
Servant Boy: Your hat si-ARRRRRGH!!
(Even the guests and little children were murdered.)
Little Girl: Shine yer shoes, govnaAAAAAAGH!!
(Hell, even the band was not safe. Playing on the stage was Brittney Spears.)
Spears: HIT ME BABY ONE MORE TIMEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAAGHHH!!!
*BLAM*
HK: Gladly, miss.
(HK, fighting his way up the castle, soon came to a room, someone crying behind it. He busted into the room, to find a large, fat bulbous piece of lard. Namely, a hut.)
Feastius: My savior! He has come at last! Please, let us escape before anyone finds out you're here.
HK: Er....who? They're all dead...
Feastius: .....Never mind. Well, what is your name, my lovely and rather badly smelling savior?
HK: The assassin droid known as HK-47, loyal only to Revan. Oops, I've said too much.
*BLAM!!*
Feastius: ....What the?...
HK: A shot to the face? And not dead?!
Feastius: That was my backside...
HK: ....Er... Let me try that again..
*BLAM BLAM BLAM BLAM*
Feastius: THAT WAS MY ARM!!!
HK: .....Time to try something different...
(He armed the flame thrower. Soon, the entire room was on fire, the entire castle being made of wood and all.)
Feastius: AAAAAAAAAHHHHHHH!!!!
HK: ...Wait...isn't fat a bit more flammable than tha...
*BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOM!!!!!*
(The entire castle was no more. In fact, neither was most of the countryside. Just a large, large crater. HK, meanwhile, was flying through the air.)
HK: ...Well, that went well. Now to find Griff...
To Be Continued..
"Part 5"
Announcer: AND NOW!! Challenging our champion, the Unknown Stranger, is another newcomer to the Taris Dueling Arena. A droid of all things, made by our very own machine master Twi=lek.........HE IS.........T3!!!!!!
(The crowd is cheering loudly as both duelists enter the arena. Revan is holding two lightsabres, each one showing off an eery violet glow. Silently, T3 rolls out.)
Announcer: LET THE BEST...er...man? No, er....BEING WIN!!!
Revan: This is too easy. YAAAAAAAR!!!
*BLAM!!! BOOM!!!! PLOOP!! CLOP!!! PACHING!!*
(Later, on the ship, Revan is in a full-body cast, laying on a bed. The rest of the Ebon Hawk=s group is watching a rerun of the fight on TV.)
Jolee: Hey Revan, they say parts of your fight are too violent for TV!
Revan: Mmph..mmm.. phmm....MMPH!!!
*((Goddamn $&^#%%&@ DROID!))
(T3 rolls up next to Revan.)
T3: Beep beep beep meep ching beep ching.
*((Shut up and eat your banana.))
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Darth Bandon: And now for something completely different!
(A giant jawa steps on him. Fade to black.)
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
(Carth, Juhani, and Jolee are seen walking through the desert of Tantooine.)
Juhani: How is it that the Ex-Dark Lord of the Sith got her ass handed to her so utterly and entirely by a sissy droid like T3?
Carth: I think HK had been tinkering with him before the fight.
Juhani: No, HK's been missing for a week now. Remember, Revan sent him after Griff.
Carth: Ohhhhh, right.
Jolee: T3 was still a little angry about being hired out as a garbage can.
(While walking, they pass by Bandon, who is hung over a campfire, surrounded by a bunch of Jawas. Juhani seems to be the only one who notices it. Suddenly, they spring to action, diving on Bandon. After a minute, all that is left is a skeleton.)
Juhani: ......I'll be seein= those things comin= at me in my sleep...
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
(On a foreign planet, HK is walking through the plains. Suddenly, a bottle hits his head. He bends over, and finds a note inside, and reads it.)
Note: To whoever may be reading this. I, Lady Feastius, am in deep need of rescuing. I am at the large wooden castle by the creek. Thankyou.
HK: Mayhap Griff is the culprit... I AM OFF!!
(Later, HK arrives at the wooden castle, a large sign is outside, reading AWedding Today@, and there is a large line of guests at the door.)
HK: HAVE AT THEE, MEATBAGS!!
(And soon, blaster shots were fired off everywhere. Maids carrying drinks were blown away. Butlers carrying food, likewise, were blasted in the face repeatedly until they stopped twitching.)
Servant Boy: Your hat si-ARRRRRGH!!
(Even the guests and little children were murdered.)
Little Girl: Shine yer shoes, govnaAAAAAAGH!!
(Hell, even the band was not safe. Playing on the stage was Brittney Spears.)
Spears: HIT ME BABY ONE MORE TIMEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAAGHHH!!!
*BLAM*
HK: Gladly, miss.
(HK, fighting his way up the castle, soon came to a room, someone crying behind it. He busted into the room, to find a large, fat bulbous piece of lard. Namely, a hut.)
Feastius: My savior! He has come at last! Please, let us escape before anyone finds out you're here.
HK: Er....who? They're all dead...
Feastius: .....Never mind. Well, what is your name, my lovely and rather badly smelling savior?
HK: The assassin droid known as HK-47, loyal only to Revan. Oops, I've said too much.
*BLAM!!*
Feastius: ....What the?...
HK: A shot to the face? And not dead?!
Feastius: That was my backside...
HK: ....Er... Let me try that again..
*BLAM BLAM BLAM BLAM*
Feastius: THAT WAS MY ARM!!!
HK: .....Time to try something different...
(He armed the flame thrower. Soon, the entire room was on fire, the entire castle being made of wood and all.)
Feastius: AAAAAAAAAHHHHHHH!!!!
HK: ...Wait...isn't fat a bit more flammable than tha...
*BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOM!!!!!*
(The entire castle was no more. In fact, neither was most of the countryside. Just a large, large crater. HK, meanwhile, was flying through the air.)
HK: ...Well, that went well. Now to find Griff...
To Be Continued..
