Italics denote thoughts, or memories
Mistake
"I'm sorry, but I can't see you anymore"It was upon a warm summer's night that a lone woman stood blue eyes distant as she gazed over the sleeping city below from the vantage point of a balcony on the 30th story of a sky-scraper. She appeared calm at first glance, but a closer look soon revealed the tremors as she struggled to choke back tears, tears of agony at the words of the one that had the power to make or break her.
"I can't do this anymore" she whispered defeated as she slid down the cement wall she had previously been leaning against to slump at its base. Her arms moved to clutch at her sides as she rocked back and forth her long suppressed sobs shaking her slender frame, each shimmering tear a testament of her pain as they ran down her face to drip off her chin.
"Why is he doing this?" she asked,
"I don't want to talk about it"
"Why now?" she demanded, "Why after everything we have been though?"
"Did you really think that I'd want to stay with a cry baby like you? Did you really believe that I loved you?"
"What happened? I thought you loved me"
"Ha you're so gullible, such a little girl"
"What's happened? What did I do wrong?"
"Leave, just forget me."
"No… I won't" she whispered in response to his words echoing in her mind
"Just get out and never come back"
A door was opened, and his arm pressed upon her shoulder shoving her out into the doorway before the door slammed loudly in her face.
"Mamo-chan? No! Mamoru don't leave me out here, I love you"
"please, just go away"
the sound of crying fills the hallway as her fists beat futilely against the unresisting door.
"Why would he do that? What has happened Mamoru to make you do this to me, to us?" she commented standing once more as she rubbed now itchy red ringed eyes.
It was time to move on, move on in a life that seemed empty even with the warmth of family and friends, the only light being the lingering glances she'd seen him give her when he thought she wasn't looking.
"I won't give up on you Mamo-chan, never. I will love you till the day I die, and then beyond" she told the world at large as if he were standing right beside her before she slipped back into her apartment,
Not knowing that right outside her buildings doors stood the object of her affections facing his own inner struggle."It's for the best, she's much too young for you... 'you're robbing the cradle' " his co-workers words echoed in his mind from when they had first started dating.
"It's better this way… she needs to get more experience" he told himself, even as jealousy's green fire burned in his chest at the thought of some-other man being the one to make her laugh, to be there kissing her, taking her in his arms.
Just get away from here, run, quickly before you give in. he told himself, yet his body did not comply, moving of its own accord towards the control panel, finger itching to dial her apartment number.
Just to hear her voice he reasoned, as he listened to the familiar ring.
"hello?" a young woman's sad voice came across the inter-com
you're breaking her up inside. Hurting her like you promised not to. His heart taunted him.
"hello?"
still he did not say a word.
"Sammy? Is that you, this isn't funny!" the woman stated thinking it was her brother
before he could stop himself he stated, "no, it's me"
the intercom went silent before tentatively as if afraid he would disappear her voice came again,
"Mamoru?"
the man said nothing, his heart slowly collapsing at the hope in her voice.
Then like a coward he turned and ran,
I have to get away he thought as he raced down the street and into the park, only to find memories of her everywhere.
God no, no, no, no… I can't do this; it can't be happening he cursed as he collapsed at the base of a tree in the park, hand rising to meet the wetness on his cheek.
Go back his heart told him go back…
Get away his mind replied. Get away before it's too late. He was trapped in the prison of his thoughts, not knowing what to do. Aching to tell her it was all a mistake, yet afraid that she would reject him.
Back in her apartment the girl released the button for the intercom.
"He's gone" she told the empty room.
And in the silence that followed the last lines of a song echoed,
Love is a
lonely place without you
I miss you
And you're almost here
And I'm almost touching you
Love is a place I have to hide away
I'll never love this way again (again)
Love is a lonely place - a lonely place
And as tears once again seeped from desolate blue eyes the girl whispered,
"I guess he really doesn't love me anymore."
A.N.
Little one-shot
galene
P.S. the song's not mine… just can't remember who's…
