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And don't forget to check out the companion piece overseen by Miss Behavin–The Meiji Journal ]                      ]

The Mibu Times -Dispatch

by

BarbaraSheridan and Miss Behavin

Vol. 7

Front page Ad:

His Eminence, the Archbishop of  Paris would like to extend His Blessings and gratitude to Matsudaira Katamori, the Daimyo of Aizu and the People of Japan for their most generous monetary gift to help the Sisters of Notre Dame refurbish and maintain their convent and school.

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Personal Ad:

To the Crimson Admirer,

My life has been rather complicated of late and I realize now that I may have been a bit harsh with you. Perhaps we can meet some time soon. I often walk along the banks of the Shijyo River when I have free time.

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 Personal Ad:

Sou-chan, please believe me. It wasn't what you thought the other night. I was performing my duty nothing more. I was obligated to entertain our master to the best of my ability. You know you are the only one for me.

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In local news:

Takagi Kojuurou, a government official in Aizu  regretfully announces the indefinite postponement of the marriage between his daughter Tokio and Captain of the Shinsengumi third unit Saitou Hajime. The reason given was that Miss Takagi found it in her best interest to continue her education in the study of Western culture. She (along with her younger sister Tami) will be attending the convent school run by the Sisters of Notre Dame in Paris, France.

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Dear Ayu-nee:

I am sick positively sick!!!! It's such a long complicated story but the gist of it is this: I was informed by my overbearing ogre of a father that I was to marry a friend of his boss's. Well his boss is positively Ancient so you can imagine what I thought my "fiance" would be like.

Anyway, I went a little crazy and ran around Kyoto like a wild woman for a few weeks. I ended up at a rowdy party where I hooked up with the hottest guy ever!!!!

He was tall and handsome and dressed in black ---and you would not believe how that man could wield his weapon of choice!!

Anyway, the party got raided, he took off andI ended up getting busted and dragged home by my father's boss of all people and then I was grounded until my "fiance" was scheduled to visit and propose formally.

Well to make a long story short--my hot party guy and my fiance are one and the same!!!  What's the problem you ask??? I'll tell you!!!!

Apparently, I got a wee bit drunk and the whole party thing made a bad impression, Mr. Tall Gorgeous and Samurai was not amused and now my father insists on "saving face" by sending me off to a convent boarding school! Can you believe it??!?!??! We're Buddhist for crying out loud!

I can't skip out and go back to Kyoto to make things right with Mr. Tall Dark and Mystical because I have this 300 pound female ninja babysitter taking me and my bratty sister to the school. She never gives me a minute alone to even try and contact my man! I have to get in touch with him! What can I do, Ayu-nee??????

Krazy in Love

You stupid wench:

Grow up! Obviously your father did your FORMER fiance a great service by breaking off the engagement! You blew it, honey, so get over it and let that wonderful thoughtful, fantastic man give a decent woman a chance!

You probably couldn't even cook him a decent bowl of soba if your life depended on it, could you? *smirk*

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Message from the Interim Editor:

It would seem that Miss Yamazaki is a bit under the weather and regretfully will suspend her advice column for the immediate time being.Vice-Chief Hijikata has volunteered to answer the any remaining letters for this issue.

—Kondou

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Employment Opportunity:

The Kyoto Town Council has appropriated more funds for the immediate hiring of Street Cleaners (Mortuary experience desirable) and exterior building maintenance workers (experience in removing stains from walls helpful).

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Employment Opportunity:

Wanted kitchen assistant. DETAILED Background Check will be performed. Contact Yamazaki Ayumu at Shinsengumi Headquarters, Mibu.

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Local News:

Shinsengumi Captain Okita Souji was questioned and released today in a rash of recent flower thefts. The investigation continues.

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Local News:

Shinsengumi Captain Saitou Hajime was nearly attacked while off duty by a person reputed to be the Hitokiri Battousai. Following a brief clash of swords the "Battousai" fled into the night. Captain Saitou was not injured and was quoted as saying "If effeminate, perfume wearing school boys are the best the Choshu Scum have to offer well..."

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Official Notice:

There has been a renewal in cases of people coming to the Shinsengumi for compensation for animal attacks. While cat scratch incidents have completely stopped, pig bites are on the rise. Everyone is expected to keep their pets under control at all times.

AND I DO MEAN EVERYONE ,OKITA!!!!!!!!!!

–Hijikata

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Official Notice:

Recently, many of our finest have been meeting their end in a sudden and mysterious fashion. We fear the Ishin Scum may have some very skilled assassins working for them. Between this person or persons' skills and our own laxity, their activities are beginning to take its toll and all of our patrols are severely short‑handed now. In an effort to improve morale and safety for everyone, we have come up with a training course that should elevate each participant's level of performance in future encounters with the Ishin dogs.

Everyone who has less than a year's experience is expected to attend these courses. For all other members, attendance is voluntary unless otherwise stated:

Defensive Swordsmanship ‑ instructed by Okita Souji ‑ voluntary

 Spear Fighting ‑ instructed by Harada Sanosuke ‑ voluntary

Basic Battle Tactics ‑ instructed by Nagakura Shinpachi ‑ voluntary

Patrolling for Ahous and How to be On-Guard When Off-Duty‑ instructed by Saito Hajime ‑ MANDATORY

–Hijikata

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Employment Opportunity:

Well respected law enforcement group currently taking applications for. Superb swordsmanship skills and Shogunate loyalty a must.

Excellent pay and medical plan, meals and uniforms  provided.

Apply Shinsengumi HQ, Mibu

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Dear Ayu-nee:

 I come from a well‑to‑do family, but I am not a samurai. Lately, however, I can not help thinking I should be taking a more active role in the events that are going on around me. I believe strongly in my ideals and I'm not afraid to die for what I believe in. I also think that I could be offering guidance to some of our

 impressionable and disaffected  youth. Should I consider joining an army of some sort? I think I might even make a good leader. Possibly even a Captain.

--‑Souzou S.

Dear Souzou,

 You sound like a fine young man and I whole‑heartedly support your desire to offer a purpose to our  forgotten children–Kami knows we get enough reports of delinquents running wild in the streets. But why simply "join" a pre‑existing army? A man of your obvious intelligence, skill and monetary background should consider forming his OWN army! Then you can be sure that the ideals you fight for are yours.. Just don't get carried away and lose your head.......

—Hijikata

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Notice From Interim Editor Kondou:

Recently while sitting int eh station of that other Kyoto peace keeping force awaiting the release of some minro acquaintances I had time to thoroughly read over some of the back issues of the Mibu Times/Dispatch. What I found greatly disturbed both myself and Vice-Chief Hijikata.

Apparently, because those we placed in charge of the various advertising sections have not been paying attention, some of our enemies have actually been able to use the paper to communicate with each other!

 This is unacceptable. Both Vice-Chief Hijikata and myself are EXTREMELY BUSY and do not have the time to hold people's hands while they perform their duties as members of the Shinsengumi even if their tasks is something as seemingly non-vital to security as taking in advertising.!

YOU should be taking note of what's going on around you and report anything suspicious to your immediate superior AT ONCE! DO NOT wait for THEM to notice!

As a result of this negligence, the members assigned to work in the advertising department have all been dismissed. A new group has been assigned to take over the advertising duties. We hope they will be more diligent in their efforts than their predecessors.

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In Local News:

A half dozen unidentified individuals were found dead yesterday of an apparent mass suicide not far from Shinsengumi Headquarters. This may very well be the work of Choshu assassins and all citizens are encouraged to remain vigilant.

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Quarter Page Ad:

Free trial shamisen lessons given to interested and qualified  young men between the ages of fifteen and thirty. The next round of try-outs will be held in the Choshu area.

Contact Sensei Takasugi c/o this publication for more information.

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