MissBehavin–Looks like you're going to have teach that man another lesson about that sneaking business.

April‑san–*blush* Thank you, thank you. You are too kind. I think Aneko's visit is something they'll remember for a long time....

Kyia Star–Amusing is better than totally insipid, yes?

Boring disclaimer thing—I own nothing to do with Rurouni Kenshin, Peace Maker Kurogane or anything of importance, though I will lay claim to Aneko Okita...

The Mibu Times -Dispatch

by

BarbaraSheridan and MissBehavin

Vol 10

Local News

The 4th Squad under the leadership of late Captain Matsubara Chuuji suffered severe losses as as result of an ambush by assassins of the Choshu Dogs on the steps leading to the Shingen Temple on the outskirts of Kyoto. The 4th squad was on their way to rendezvous with the 3rd squad at the end of their shift when the attack occurred. The rumored Battousai was no reported as beign involved.

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 Official Notice:

By Noon tomorrow, each captain is to recommend two (2) members to replenish the ranks of the 4th squad until the next class of recruits is ready to be put on the street. Captain in Training Ichimura Tetsunosuke will be promoted to full Captain and will oversee the unit.

As per Captain Saitou's excellent suggestion to give young Ichimura the benefit of the experience of our seasoned Captains the 4th squad will begin alternating patrols  with units 1,2 5, 6, 7, and 8 as of tomorrow

---Kondou

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[Editor's note: Miss Okita has graciously agreed to answer the advice column letters that have come in since the last issue]

Dear Ayu-nee:

I don't know why I'm writing to you at all since you were so mean to me last time, but I'm desperate! I have no one here to talk to unless you count the gargoyles on the rooftop and they probably only speak French anyway just like the ancient nuns who lok a lot liek the gargoyles. My sister is no help at all since she's trying to "westernize" herself and is acting like Marie Flipping Antoinette. *Ugh*

My problem?  It's the same as last time! I'm stuck here in Croissant Hell because I made a fool of myself in front of my HOT HOT HOT fiance who I didn't know was my fiance (it's an arranged marriage thing--don't ask)

Anyway, I can't stop thinking about Mr Tall Dark and Sexy Samurai. I hear that low measured voice of his drifting on every breeze, I see those eyes of his looking at me from every dark corner, I feel his hands.....well you get the idea. *sigh* 

What can I do, Ayu-nee? How can I apologize for the mistake I made with him? How can I win him back?  How can I get my ogre of a fatehr to get me out of this hell hole????

----Going Krazy Pining for my Mibu Wolf

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Dear Krazy:

It took some digging but I managed to find the copy of your previous letters. My, but you have gotten yourself into quite the mess haven't you, young lady???  Have you learned your lesson?  I do hope so.  However, far be it from me to lecture anyone on how to behave, let me just say this----Time Heals All Wounds.  It may take a LONG TIME but I'm sure that eventually the wound you've caused your young man  and your parents will mend itself.  All you can do is wait.

If you would like me to speak to your young man on your behalf, tell me who he is by private mail and I'll do what I can to help your cause.

----Your Friend Aneko

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Official Announcement:

After some casual checking of company records by an impartial bystander it has been brought to the attention of Chief Kondou and myself that most of our patrol losses at the hands of Choshu Scum Assassins have occurred following overnight leaves and off-duty visits to Shimabara.

Clearly the distraction of the various physical pleasures to be found in Shimabara is making you men a bit too relaxed and consequently lax in your duties.  As such I have no alternative but to implement the suggestion of our concerned citizen and prohibit all future over-night leaves and off-duty visits to Shimabara.

Consequently, all undercover surveillance assignments will also be postponed. Therefore Captains Nagakura and Harada are expected to return their "undercover accessories" to Furitake's Fashion Fetish Shop. Please bring said accessories to my quarters first to make certain that all receipts required for a refund are present.

---Hijikata

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Dear Ayu-nee:

I'm devastated. My boyfriend suddenly seems disinterested in me.  At first I thought it was the stress of his executive position and then the change of shifts in my own job but now I'm certain that it's something more. And I think the "more" is my sister!

They've known each other forever as we all grew up together but lately they seem a bit too "chummy" if you get my drift. She's even begun doing some temporary work at our company. I think she's trying to replace me!  What can I do?

----Frantic in the First

Dear Frantic:

Calm down, calm down! Surely you're exaggerating things. You did say that both you and your man have been under a great deal of stress at your place of employment, did you not? 

Obviously that's the real problem. And this man of yours is an executive?  I take it that you are not? Well that alone is major source of conflict.

Don't even think of blaming your poor sister who I'm certain wants nothing more than your complete and lasting happiness.

I hate to be blunt but perhaps this relationship is not meant to be. After all, there is a reason why they say do not mix business and pleasure. 

----Your Friend Aneko

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Dear Whoever's Filling in for Ayu-nee:

My life stinks! Oh it was fine for awhile--I had a good but demanding civillian job for a local para-military group, but then things started to happen.

 There was trouble with my younger sibling, and then I got a crush on a co-worker who dumped me from the get-go and then I did find a really nice guy but he took off and got killed when he fell in with a bad crows and then I almost lost my job because of the little sneak thief who was hired to help in my department. The last straw came when I totally spazzed and was told to "take a vacation" by my boss.

What  do to get myself back together?

-----Damsel in Distress

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Dear Damsel:

Oh, Girl I do feel your pain!!! This is the very same type of thing  that made me pack my bags and say to hell with it, I'm out of here! What you and I both need is a Girl's Night Out and I know just the ticket....You sit tight. I'll be in touch.

---- Your Friend Aneko

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Personal Ad:

Hey Pretty Lady!

The Thursday Night Kenpo Club isn't the same without you! Hurry back to Edo and don't forget your fan!

---Aoshi and the Boys

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Announcement:

I've heard that all recreational leaves have been canceled until further notice and I'm certain that you gentlemen will be looking for wholesome entertainment for your off-duty hours.  As such I would like to let you know that while I'm here I'm available any time of the day or night (except between the hours of midnight and 4 a.m.)  to chat, walk the compund or even share a cup of sake and perhaps a nice round of Go with you.

Okita Aneko

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Half Page Ad:

 One Night Only !

Next Thursday!

Appearing exclusively at the Ikeda-ya direct from the Edo Castle Kit Kat Club for one night only  are the Yamakita Sisters!

Watch them do their fabled Fan Dance.

 See them gyrate to the beat of the Kodo Drums.

Be stunned and amazed when they twist their supple limbs into daring positions.

Slip them a couple ryu and-----well, we don't want to spoil the surprise. Just come on over and see for yourself.

One Night Only !

Next Thursday!

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