Disclaimer: Still don't own Diablo (nor any minions)
Episode 3: Happy Hour on the Kurast Docks
On a torchlit pier in Kurast, the normally collected (and occasionally somewhat imposing) sorceress Morrighan stood by, tapping her foot impatiently, and glaring at her partner Ravenwing.
Although this was not an unusual state of affairs for the self-styled Doomettes, it was a problem that was always compounded when the two found themselves in Kurast.
The battered jungle port Kurast, wherein the normally silent (an occasionally somewhat talented) assassin Ravenwing could once again plead futilely for hours with the master assassin Natalya for the name of her weaponsmith.
"Look, lady! We're like, sister assassins! And I'm working my tail and both my wrists off out there to defeat Mephisto's minions. All you do is stand here, looking tough, chatting it up with these…" Ravenwing paused, completely incensed, "-banana toting, half clothed- natives!"
Morrighan coughed forcefully, exhaling magical sparks of lightning for dramatic effect. Ravenwing ignored Morrighan. Natalya ignored Ravenwing.
The younger woman railed on. "I've found perfect replicas of your armor, your boots, -and- your helmet! Look here ma'am…" Ravenwing lowered her voice to a conspiratorial whisper, "Some trader in Harrogath named 'Amazonbabe23' told me if I found an exact duplicate of your weapon, I could be –invisible-! If I were invisible, the Travincal council would be so totally…"
Unable to maintain her semblance of composure any longer, Morrighan interjected through clenched teeth, "Ravenwing... Portal is –open-. Neither evil nor I can wait… for your monologue to end. Again."
Ravenwing gave a half-hearted chuckle, "Oh, come on, Morrighan, I almost have her! She has to say something –sometime-. I mean, no one can stand there completely silent and unmoving forever! I mean, it would be cool if I could, because I would look, like, um, really cool and evil. And stuff. But she just –can't-!"
But Morrighan was already walking briskly towards her shiny blue portal, staff at the ready, robes flapping in the sea breeze.
"Um, I'll give you gold. Lots of gold. Or, er, Gems! You want gems, try -her-…" Ravenwing gestured frantically at the retreating figure of her friend, "… I can tell you, I know she's got some perfect diamonds in that stash of hers… I know where she keeps the key! She gets all the good weapons anyway!"
No response. Feeling quite ready to scream in utter irritation, Ravenwing prepared to lose all decorum and put a roundhouse right into the Master Assassin's face, but for some reason, a tiny voice in the back of her head nagged 'not in town'. Natalya kept staring emotionlessly into space, volunteering not even a change of expression. Meanwhile, somewhere, many miles away, Morrighan apparated in and began heroically and quite enthusiastically battling the forces of darkness in the fallen Kurast Bazaar.
Ravenwing watched the last wisps of Morrighan's portal dissipate to nothing, as across the docks, Captain Meshif and his crew burst into a slightly off- key rendition of a drinking song from Westmarch. Apparently, happy hour on the docks had begun early.
The assassin sat for a moment, suddenly feeling rather ill, dangling her feet into the sea, and determined to get herself a pint before setting out on the long, perilous journey through the Flayer jungle and across the Great Marsh, to meet her equally abused and unappreciated comrade.
Authors' note: To all those who have reviewed: Thank you for your +1 comments! You—are—our--- inspiration------!
