Jo let the food on the tray go cold. Instead she pushed it around, making patterns and designs. For nearly a month she had hardly been able to keep anything down and the antacids she usually used to combat the food weren't helping. Jo was worried that it was something more serious, but she couldn't bring herself to say anything to one of the doctors. They'd probably overreact and treat her like an invalid when it was really just a bad case of indigestion.
"Lieutenant, sir, I mean ma'am," the short young man stammered from behind his glasses.
"What Radar?" demanded Jo, irritated.
"Uh, I think this belongs to you." He held out a book.
Jo took it from him and opened it. Dear Victoria, the top of the page read.
"You've been snooping through my things!" she accused.
Radar seemed flustered. "No, I just found it, honest. It just took a while to figure out who it belonged to. But then I figured, since you were the only one to go on leave around the time that letter was started, it must be yours," he finished, looking somewhat satisfied with himself.
"So, you admit you were reading my private letters," Jo said, raising her voice. By now she was loud enough that most of the mess tent had turned to see what the commotion was all about, but Jo didn't care. She stood up, pushing her plate into Radar's hands. "You want to snoop through my food too?"
Jo turned to leave and bumped right into Hawkeye.
"Hey, take it easy," he told her, gently holding her shoulders.
Jo shook herself free and glared at him before leaving the tent.
As she was walking away, she heard Hawkeye call out to her. "That was a bit rough, don't you think? I mean Radar was only trying to be helpful."
Jo turned, "What's it to you?"
By now Hawkeye had caught up to her. "Jo," he said softly. "Things have been kind of strained between us, but..."
"You think?" Jo cut him off. She didn't know when she had started to feel angry with Hawkeye. In fact, she didn't know when she had started to feel angry at all, but she wasn't finished. "You think just because of...of what happened you have some kind of responsibility for me?"
"I thought...I mean... You said it was alright."
"Well, I didn't mean it," Jo spat, venomous. "Now, leave me alone!"
"I'm sorry," Hawkeye said softly to Jo's back as she stomped away.
Jo stopped and turned to look at Hawkeye. Her anger vanished and was replaced by guilt. "No Hawkeye," she said, "I'm sorry. I don't know what's wrong with me. I'm just so tired." Hawkeye reached out to her and she allowed herself to collapse into his arms. "I just wish this damn war was over so I could be home with my family."
In her tent, Jo ignored the other nurses chattering in the middle of the tent and went straight to her cot. She opened the book Radar had returned to her and opened it to the first page. She remembered starting the letter. It seemed so long ago. Nearly a month ago she had started to write her sister. Jo guiltily looked over at the stack of letters her sister had sent in that time, none of them answered.
Jo looked again at the date on the letter and at her calendar, hanging beside her bed. Counting backward on her fingers, she realized it had been more than three weeks. Her eyes went wide. More than three weeks and Jo had only just now realized. Her stomach dropped and Jo grimaced, hoping she wouldn't be sick. She was oblivious to the jovial conversation going on around the stove in the tent. She didn't really want to consider the possibility, but she knew she had to.
How could she not have noticed? Every month, like clockwork it came, but this month... Jo couldn't even let herself finish the thought.
Jo stumbled into Major Houlihan's tent, belatedly remembering to knock.
"Lieutenant," the major said irritated, "didn't anyone teach you to knock?"
"I'm sorry, Major, it's just... I need your help," Jo blurted out. Standing in the middle of the tent, Jo explained the situation. "I'm late," she said, embarrassed. "My...my monthly visitor is late. I think..." she trailed off.
"You'll have to go to Tokyo," the Major explained, her expression softening, "we don't have the equipment to do the test here." The Major pulled out a chair for Jo and sat down across from her on the edge of her cot. Grateful, Jo slouched into the chair. "What are you going to do?"
"I don't know," Jo admitted. "I'm scared. I always wanted a baby, but this...this wasn't how I thought it would happen. I always imagined more white picket fences, and less mine fields," she said, smiling. "Maybe, after all the dying we see here, maybe a baby wouldn't be such a bad thing. As much as I'm afraid, a part of me is excited too."
"Sir, could I speak with you?" Jo asked, her voice shaking.
"Certainly, Lieutenant," the fatherly Colonel said. "Have a seat."
Jo sank deep into the chair, wishing herself anywhere but here. "Sir, I have to go to Tokyo."
"Lieutenant? Weren't you the one who just refused leave to Tokyo? If I remember correctly I had to order you to take some R&R."
Jo took a deep breath, "I think I'm pregnant."
"I see," the Colonel finally said, clearing his throat. "Who is the father?"
"I can't say," Jo gulped, her face reddening.
The Colonel examined her. "Can't?"
"I don't know, sir," Jo bluffed. "It happened while I was on leave." She hoped her bluff was better than her usual performance at the weekly poker games. She was blushing, in part because of the situation and in part because of what she was suggesting. Jo could only imagine what the Colonel must be thinking of her, but she couldn't tell the truth. The truth would implicate someone else. It was more than he bargained for, Jo reasoned. She couldn't do that to him. If it was true that she was pregnant, it was something she would have to do alone. Jo straightened in her chair a bit.
"We'll get you out to Tokyo as soon as possible Lieutenant," the Colonel told her, signing the piece of paper that gave her permission to leave the camp.
Two days later Jo returned, heart heavy. She walked into Colonel Potter's office.
"Sir?" she asked, handing him the envelope. "Can we keep the reasons for my discharge private?"
Jo knocked quietly on Major Houlihan's door.
"Who is it?" she asked.
"Lieutenant Avery."
The door opened for Jo and she walked in. "I'm leaving," she told the major. "I wanted to come and thank you in person before I left."
"So, it was..."
"Positive," Jo finished for her. "They're shipping me home. I leave today." The air in the room seemed to stand still and the two women stood there in awkward silence as well. "I've asked Colonel Potter to keep the real reasons for my discharge confidential. I don't want anyone to know." Especially Hawkeye, Jo thought.
"You're a good nurse, Lieutenant," Major Houlihan told her. Jo thought she could see tears in the Major's eyes. "If you ever need a reference, don't hesitate to contact me."
"Thank you Major. It's been an honour to serve with you." Jo saluted the Major and left the tent. Forty-eight hours later she was back on American soil.
"Lieutenant, sir, I mean ma'am," the short young man stammered from behind his glasses.
"What Radar?" demanded Jo, irritated.
"Uh, I think this belongs to you." He held out a book.
Jo took it from him and opened it. Dear Victoria, the top of the page read.
"You've been snooping through my things!" she accused.
Radar seemed flustered. "No, I just found it, honest. It just took a while to figure out who it belonged to. But then I figured, since you were the only one to go on leave around the time that letter was started, it must be yours," he finished, looking somewhat satisfied with himself.
"So, you admit you were reading my private letters," Jo said, raising her voice. By now she was loud enough that most of the mess tent had turned to see what the commotion was all about, but Jo didn't care. She stood up, pushing her plate into Radar's hands. "You want to snoop through my food too?"
Jo turned to leave and bumped right into Hawkeye.
"Hey, take it easy," he told her, gently holding her shoulders.
Jo shook herself free and glared at him before leaving the tent.
As she was walking away, she heard Hawkeye call out to her. "That was a bit rough, don't you think? I mean Radar was only trying to be helpful."
Jo turned, "What's it to you?"
By now Hawkeye had caught up to her. "Jo," he said softly. "Things have been kind of strained between us, but..."
"You think?" Jo cut him off. She didn't know when she had started to feel angry with Hawkeye. In fact, she didn't know when she had started to feel angry at all, but she wasn't finished. "You think just because of...of what happened you have some kind of responsibility for me?"
"I thought...I mean... You said it was alright."
"Well, I didn't mean it," Jo spat, venomous. "Now, leave me alone!"
"I'm sorry," Hawkeye said softly to Jo's back as she stomped away.
Jo stopped and turned to look at Hawkeye. Her anger vanished and was replaced by guilt. "No Hawkeye," she said, "I'm sorry. I don't know what's wrong with me. I'm just so tired." Hawkeye reached out to her and she allowed herself to collapse into his arms. "I just wish this damn war was over so I could be home with my family."
In her tent, Jo ignored the other nurses chattering in the middle of the tent and went straight to her cot. She opened the book Radar had returned to her and opened it to the first page. She remembered starting the letter. It seemed so long ago. Nearly a month ago she had started to write her sister. Jo guiltily looked over at the stack of letters her sister had sent in that time, none of them answered.
Jo looked again at the date on the letter and at her calendar, hanging beside her bed. Counting backward on her fingers, she realized it had been more than three weeks. Her eyes went wide. More than three weeks and Jo had only just now realized. Her stomach dropped and Jo grimaced, hoping she wouldn't be sick. She was oblivious to the jovial conversation going on around the stove in the tent. She didn't really want to consider the possibility, but she knew she had to.
How could she not have noticed? Every month, like clockwork it came, but this month... Jo couldn't even let herself finish the thought.
Jo stumbled into Major Houlihan's tent, belatedly remembering to knock.
"Lieutenant," the major said irritated, "didn't anyone teach you to knock?"
"I'm sorry, Major, it's just... I need your help," Jo blurted out. Standing in the middle of the tent, Jo explained the situation. "I'm late," she said, embarrassed. "My...my monthly visitor is late. I think..." she trailed off.
"You'll have to go to Tokyo," the Major explained, her expression softening, "we don't have the equipment to do the test here." The Major pulled out a chair for Jo and sat down across from her on the edge of her cot. Grateful, Jo slouched into the chair. "What are you going to do?"
"I don't know," Jo admitted. "I'm scared. I always wanted a baby, but this...this wasn't how I thought it would happen. I always imagined more white picket fences, and less mine fields," she said, smiling. "Maybe, after all the dying we see here, maybe a baby wouldn't be such a bad thing. As much as I'm afraid, a part of me is excited too."
"Sir, could I speak with you?" Jo asked, her voice shaking.
"Certainly, Lieutenant," the fatherly Colonel said. "Have a seat."
Jo sank deep into the chair, wishing herself anywhere but here. "Sir, I have to go to Tokyo."
"Lieutenant? Weren't you the one who just refused leave to Tokyo? If I remember correctly I had to order you to take some R&R."
Jo took a deep breath, "I think I'm pregnant."
"I see," the Colonel finally said, clearing his throat. "Who is the father?"
"I can't say," Jo gulped, her face reddening.
The Colonel examined her. "Can't?"
"I don't know, sir," Jo bluffed. "It happened while I was on leave." She hoped her bluff was better than her usual performance at the weekly poker games. She was blushing, in part because of the situation and in part because of what she was suggesting. Jo could only imagine what the Colonel must be thinking of her, but she couldn't tell the truth. The truth would implicate someone else. It was more than he bargained for, Jo reasoned. She couldn't do that to him. If it was true that she was pregnant, it was something she would have to do alone. Jo straightened in her chair a bit.
"We'll get you out to Tokyo as soon as possible Lieutenant," the Colonel told her, signing the piece of paper that gave her permission to leave the camp.
Two days later Jo returned, heart heavy. She walked into Colonel Potter's office.
"Sir?" she asked, handing him the envelope. "Can we keep the reasons for my discharge private?"
Jo knocked quietly on Major Houlihan's door.
"Who is it?" she asked.
"Lieutenant Avery."
The door opened for Jo and she walked in. "I'm leaving," she told the major. "I wanted to come and thank you in person before I left."
"So, it was..."
"Positive," Jo finished for her. "They're shipping me home. I leave today." The air in the room seemed to stand still and the two women stood there in awkward silence as well. "I've asked Colonel Potter to keep the real reasons for my discharge confidential. I don't want anyone to know." Especially Hawkeye, Jo thought.
"You're a good nurse, Lieutenant," Major Houlihan told her. Jo thought she could see tears in the Major's eyes. "If you ever need a reference, don't hesitate to contact me."
"Thank you Major. It's been an honour to serve with you." Jo saluted the Major and left the tent. Forty-eight hours later she was back on American soil.
