~I don't own Cardcaptor Sakura~
Shaoran x Tomoyo fluff. It's a little angsty but it'll get happy, promise.
Thanks to Serenity Blossom, Simplicity and AnimeGal for reviewing~! lots of reviews again, I was really happy~!!! you guys are the best!
sorry it took so long to update~ i had the chapter written, but my computer hates me! so ill put up two ^^ hope that makes up for it!
~~~~~Chapter 11: Jonquils and a Broken Heart~~~~~
Shaoran's POV
"Shaoran..."
"Tomoyo, I..."
"Shaoran, how could you... why?!"
Why... Because you're beautiful? Because you're perfect? Because I love you? Because I have for years, and because I need you to know? Because I can't control myself anymore? Because I want you so badly, I'm reduced to asking both Sakura *and* Meilin for advice? I can't explain why! It'd take forever!
"Tomoyo... I, I think I'm in love with you. No, I *know* I am. I have been for a few years, now, and..."
"No... no, you're not... this is a joke... it isn't funny! Please, stop it already, Shaoran! Please!"
Please stop crying... you're breaking my heart... in more ways than one. Please stop, Tomoyo...
"Tomoyo, I..."
"Shaoran, I... please don't do this to me. First, out of nowhere, you kiss me, then you tell me you love me?! How could you play with my feelings like this? You said I could trust you! Do you even reali..."
"Reali... realize? Realize what?"
"It's nothing, nevermind. ...Why would you do this? What about Sakura? You love her! And I'm her best friend! Don't you see how wrong that is?!"
"Tomoyo... I know what it seems like, but it's not true. I don't love Sakura, I haven't for a while. She doesn't love me, either..."
"That's not true! You're still together after 15 years! You *must* be in love!"
"I- Tomoyo... how do you feel about me?"
I'll take a chance... after all, this is already turning out to be as bad as it possibly can be. At least I'll know...
"I... you... that doesn't matter. What matters is that you and Sakura are my two best friends... don't you realize what problems we would cause?!"
"What problems would it cause? I told you, Sakura and I aren't like that. And, Tomoyo, even if we were... don't *you* realize that your feelings *matter*?! How can you abuse yourself the way you do?"
"What I do to myself isn't really any of your business, Li. Now, if you don't mind, I think I'll head home."
It doesn't matter? Is that a 'yes, I love you, too but I can't say it' or a 'no, I can't stand you and I only put up with you because you're my best friend's boyfriend'?
...Well, not that it has to be one of those extremes, but... somehow I get the feeling it is.
Wait, she's going home by herself? This is bad. I didn't realize- I mean, I guess I did, but I never thought she would ignore me or hate me for telling her something like that...
Well, maybe it's the *way* I told her.
I'm not big on apologizing... hell, I'm not even polite... but I'll make an exception for her.
"Tomoyo- Daidouji-san, please... at least let me walk you home, it's cold, and dark. I'd feel bad leaving you here to walk by yourself."
"Fine... we live in the same direction, anyway."
"...Can I still call you Tomoyo?"
As soon as I said that, her face softened, and she looked almost as if she was going to cry... Aw, man, I can't believe *I'm* the bastard that put that look on her face...
"Sure... if I can still call you Shaoran."
"Tomoyo, I- I'm sorry. I didn't mean to hurt you..."
"It's all right, and I'm sorry I got so upset... you know, for a moment, I... I was the happiest I've..."
What was that she mumbled? Something like... happy?...
What the hell?
"Happiest...?"
"Oh, I-I mean- it's nothing."
Nothing, huh... she still won't tell me anything...
"Well, if there's any way I can make you happy, tell me... okay? I hate seeing you sad..."
"Yeah...thanks, Shaoran."
From experience, I know 'yeah', coming from Tomoyo, doesn't mean a damn thing. She's not going to tell me anything. Damn it!
But I wonder if it was something *I* did that made her happy?
Anyway, back to my present situation... Damn. I can't believe I just confessed to the girl I love and she doesn't love me. What's even more suprising is the fact that I'm still talking with her, as friendly as ever. I mean, it's not that anything could make me mad at Tomoyo... but I'm surprised that I'm still relatively calm. Guess it hasn't set in yet.
But, she doesn't love me... I... I have to do *something*. I just don't know what that something is.
~~~~~a gift of jonquils says 'please love me'
Shaoran x Tomoyo fluff. It's a little angsty but it'll get happy, promise.
Thanks to Serenity Blossom, Simplicity and AnimeGal for reviewing~! lots of reviews again, I was really happy~!!! you guys are the best!
sorry it took so long to update~ i had the chapter written, but my computer hates me! so ill put up two ^^ hope that makes up for it!
~~~~~Chapter 11: Jonquils and a Broken Heart~~~~~
Shaoran's POV
"Shaoran..."
"Tomoyo, I..."
"Shaoran, how could you... why?!"
Why... Because you're beautiful? Because you're perfect? Because I love you? Because I have for years, and because I need you to know? Because I can't control myself anymore? Because I want you so badly, I'm reduced to asking both Sakura *and* Meilin for advice? I can't explain why! It'd take forever!
"Tomoyo... I, I think I'm in love with you. No, I *know* I am. I have been for a few years, now, and..."
"No... no, you're not... this is a joke... it isn't funny! Please, stop it already, Shaoran! Please!"
Please stop crying... you're breaking my heart... in more ways than one. Please stop, Tomoyo...
"Tomoyo, I..."
"Shaoran, I... please don't do this to me. First, out of nowhere, you kiss me, then you tell me you love me?! How could you play with my feelings like this? You said I could trust you! Do you even reali..."
"Reali... realize? Realize what?"
"It's nothing, nevermind. ...Why would you do this? What about Sakura? You love her! And I'm her best friend! Don't you see how wrong that is?!"
"Tomoyo... I know what it seems like, but it's not true. I don't love Sakura, I haven't for a while. She doesn't love me, either..."
"That's not true! You're still together after 15 years! You *must* be in love!"
"I- Tomoyo... how do you feel about me?"
I'll take a chance... after all, this is already turning out to be as bad as it possibly can be. At least I'll know...
"I... you... that doesn't matter. What matters is that you and Sakura are my two best friends... don't you realize what problems we would cause?!"
"What problems would it cause? I told you, Sakura and I aren't like that. And, Tomoyo, even if we were... don't *you* realize that your feelings *matter*?! How can you abuse yourself the way you do?"
"What I do to myself isn't really any of your business, Li. Now, if you don't mind, I think I'll head home."
It doesn't matter? Is that a 'yes, I love you, too but I can't say it' or a 'no, I can't stand you and I only put up with you because you're my best friend's boyfriend'?
...Well, not that it has to be one of those extremes, but... somehow I get the feeling it is.
Wait, she's going home by herself? This is bad. I didn't realize- I mean, I guess I did, but I never thought she would ignore me or hate me for telling her something like that...
Well, maybe it's the *way* I told her.
I'm not big on apologizing... hell, I'm not even polite... but I'll make an exception for her.
"Tomoyo- Daidouji-san, please... at least let me walk you home, it's cold, and dark. I'd feel bad leaving you here to walk by yourself."
"Fine... we live in the same direction, anyway."
"...Can I still call you Tomoyo?"
As soon as I said that, her face softened, and she looked almost as if she was going to cry... Aw, man, I can't believe *I'm* the bastard that put that look on her face...
"Sure... if I can still call you Shaoran."
"Tomoyo, I- I'm sorry. I didn't mean to hurt you..."
"It's all right, and I'm sorry I got so upset... you know, for a moment, I... I was the happiest I've..."
What was that she mumbled? Something like... happy?...
What the hell?
"Happiest...?"
"Oh, I-I mean- it's nothing."
Nothing, huh... she still won't tell me anything...
"Well, if there's any way I can make you happy, tell me... okay? I hate seeing you sad..."
"Yeah...thanks, Shaoran."
From experience, I know 'yeah', coming from Tomoyo, doesn't mean a damn thing. She's not going to tell me anything. Damn it!
But I wonder if it was something *I* did that made her happy?
Anyway, back to my present situation... Damn. I can't believe I just confessed to the girl I love and she doesn't love me. What's even more suprising is the fact that I'm still talking with her, as friendly as ever. I mean, it's not that anything could make me mad at Tomoyo... but I'm surprised that I'm still relatively calm. Guess it hasn't set in yet.
But, she doesn't love me... I... I have to do *something*. I just don't know what that something is.
~~~~~a gift of jonquils says 'please love me'
