From The Inside
Author's notes: Harry decides to practice Occlumency during the summer, figuring it's the least he can do, but can he really get rid of the pain and anger from the loss of Sirius?
*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~
*~*~*~*~*
[I don't know who to trust]
He's not coming back
[No surprise]
Is he?
[Everyone feels so far away from me]
All I can think about is his face
[Heavy thoughts sift through dust]
He was laughing
[And the lies]
You stole his laugh from me
~*~
[Trying not to break]
I will seek revenge
[But I'm so tired of this deceit]
I won't give up until you're dead
[Every time I try to make myself]
This time, you won't fool me so easily
[Get back up on my feet]
I will empty myself of you
[All I ever think about is this]
Relieve myself from the disease that is you
[All the tiring time between]
The plague rummaging the land
[And how trying to put my trust in you]
What doesn't kill you makes you stronger
[Just takes so much out of me]
I'll kill you and destroy your strength
~*~
[I take everything from the inside]
No anger
[And throw it all away]
No hatred
['Cause I swear]
No bitterness
[For the last time]
No annoyance
[I won't trust myself with you]
No love
~*~
[Tension is building inside]
No matter what I do
[Steadily]
The image of you stays
[Everyone feels so far away from me]
Seeing you makes me hate again
[Heavy thoughts forcing their way]
Makes me want to scream
[Out of me]
Why does it have to be my responsibility?
~*~
[Trying not to break]
I can't help but lose my temper
[But I'm so tired of this deceit]
When I think of what you've done
[Every time I try to make myself]
What you're going to do
[Get back up on my feet]
They can never understand the pain
[All I ever think about is this]
The frustration I feel
[All the tiring time between]
They won't know until it's too late to tell them
[And how trying to put my trust in you]
When you're dead
[Just takes so much out of me]
Or I'm dead
~*~
[I take everything from the inside]
Am I scared?
[And throw it all away]
Do I feel guilty?
['Cause I swear]
Can I really grasp this?
[For the last time]
Not yet
[I won't trust myself with you]
But soon
~*~
[I won't waste myself on you]
Soon I'll have to face this
[Waste myself on you]
I'll have to face you
[You]
You'll see me for who I am
~*~
[I won't waste myself on you]
After that, we'll be through
[Waste myself on you]
One of us will live
[You]
One of us will conquer
~*~
[I take everything from the inside]
Focus now
[And throw it all away]
I must empty myself again
['Cause I swear]
I must run away from you
[For the last time]
The intrusion in my head must end
[I won't trust myself with you]
For their sake more than mine
[Everything from the inside]
I'm dangerous
[And throw it all away]
You're dangerous through me
['Cause I swear]
Can't I just fall asleep
[For the last time]
Never worry about you again
[I won't trust myself with you]
Never worry about anything again
[You]
I'll kill you some day
[You]
I will
Author's notes: Harry decides to practice Occlumency during the summer, figuring it's the least he can do, but can he really get rid of the pain and anger from the loss of Sirius?
*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~
*~*~*~*~*
[I don't know who to trust]
He's not coming back
[No surprise]
Is he?
[Everyone feels so far away from me]
All I can think about is his face
[Heavy thoughts sift through dust]
He was laughing
[And the lies]
You stole his laugh from me
~*~
[Trying not to break]
I will seek revenge
[But I'm so tired of this deceit]
I won't give up until you're dead
[Every time I try to make myself]
This time, you won't fool me so easily
[Get back up on my feet]
I will empty myself of you
[All I ever think about is this]
Relieve myself from the disease that is you
[All the tiring time between]
The plague rummaging the land
[And how trying to put my trust in you]
What doesn't kill you makes you stronger
[Just takes so much out of me]
I'll kill you and destroy your strength
~*~
[I take everything from the inside]
No anger
[And throw it all away]
No hatred
['Cause I swear]
No bitterness
[For the last time]
No annoyance
[I won't trust myself with you]
No love
~*~
[Tension is building inside]
No matter what I do
[Steadily]
The image of you stays
[Everyone feels so far away from me]
Seeing you makes me hate again
[Heavy thoughts forcing their way]
Makes me want to scream
[Out of me]
Why does it have to be my responsibility?
~*~
[Trying not to break]
I can't help but lose my temper
[But I'm so tired of this deceit]
When I think of what you've done
[Every time I try to make myself]
What you're going to do
[Get back up on my feet]
They can never understand the pain
[All I ever think about is this]
The frustration I feel
[All the tiring time between]
They won't know until it's too late to tell them
[And how trying to put my trust in you]
When you're dead
[Just takes so much out of me]
Or I'm dead
~*~
[I take everything from the inside]
Am I scared?
[And throw it all away]
Do I feel guilty?
['Cause I swear]
Can I really grasp this?
[For the last time]
Not yet
[I won't trust myself with you]
But soon
~*~
[I won't waste myself on you]
Soon I'll have to face this
[Waste myself on you]
I'll have to face you
[You]
You'll see me for who I am
~*~
[I won't waste myself on you]
After that, we'll be through
[Waste myself on you]
One of us will live
[You]
One of us will conquer
~*~
[I take everything from the inside]
Focus now
[And throw it all away]
I must empty myself again
['Cause I swear]
I must run away from you
[For the last time]
The intrusion in my head must end
[I won't trust myself with you]
For their sake more than mine
[Everything from the inside]
I'm dangerous
[And throw it all away]
You're dangerous through me
['Cause I swear]
Can't I just fall asleep
[For the last time]
Never worry about you again
[I won't trust myself with you]
Never worry about anything again
[You]
I'll kill you some day
[You]
I will
