AUTHOR'S NOTE Before anyone asks, yes I wrote that whole Quenya song. I'm very proud of it! And also, this is movieverse, thus explaining why Haldir shows up. And also, I should mention that the name Daelin came from my roommate. She was reading "Red and White" and couldn't read my handwriting, reading "darlin" as "Daelin." So thanks Lauren!
DISCLAIMER Don't own who Tolkien owns. *sigh* You should know who I do own tho.
Having to say goodbye to Legolas, knowing the heavy possibility that he could die, pushed me into a deep depression. Gauna tried to cheer me up as best she could, but she and Marek had also said goodbye and her mood was no brighter than mine.
Desperate to have my sorrow heard by someone, I closed my eyes and softly started to sing.
Elen sila lumen omentilmo,
Gerich ui-veleth nîn.
Nálve ullume.
Sii nán lemba, mornie utúlië.
Niiri lantane e Eleni,
Aare quela an morne.
Ananta er aure omentuva ata,
Ar alasse ar galad tuuva.
Tenna enyaare, namaarie.
My raw despair poured into my voice. I was surprised at the intensity of my emotions, for I was still learning how to live as an Elf. Elves live by their emotions and feel them much stronger than humans.
"That was…beautiful, Rae!" Gauna whispered, silent tears falling from her eyes.
"Thank you," I said, my own tears also falling. "It was in Quenya, High Language of the Elves."
"What does it mean?" she asked.
I was quiet for a minute, translating in my head. "It means,
'A star shall shine upon the hour of our meeting
You have my everlasting love,
We are forever.
Now I am left behind, darkness has come.
Tears fall from the stars,
Sunlight fades to black.
But yet one day we will meet again,
And joy and light will find us.
Until then, farewell.'"
Daelin ran over to me and climbed into my lap. He seemed to be quite fond of me. Reaching a hand up to grab some of my hair, he said, "Rae-elf no cry!"
I wiped the tears from my eyes and nodded. "No cry." Daelin seemed satisfied and closed his eyes, softly sucking his thumb.
Gauna and I grew quiet again. All the refugees hiding in the caves had ceased conversation long ago. The air in the dark caves was thick and close and I longed for a cool, clean breeze and the stars overheard. I leaned my head against the cold stone and let my mind wander.
In my mind's eye, I returned to my childhood in Lórien. My few childhood friends who aged much slower than I did. Running and playing games in the forest, which I was sure went on forever. Of course, my night at the Mirror. And those last dreamlike days that I spent in Lórien truly as its citizen.
"Open the gates!"
I was pulled out of my reflections by that faint cry I heard. I turned to Gauna. "Did you hear that?"
"Hear what?" she asked, confused.
"They are opening the gates!" I answered, staring intently towards the strong wooden doors that led out to the fortress. "Take Daelin!" I said and gave the sleeping child to his mother.
"Rae, where are you going?" I heard her call as I pushed toward the doors.
They were opened by the time I reached them. Two armored elven warriors led two cloaked figures inside the caves. 'Wait a minute,' I thought. 'Elven warriors?'
"Mae govannen!" I called the Elvish greeting to them. The one clearly in charge turned around. I couldn't believe my eyes. "Haldir??" I cried.
His eyes widened. "Lady Raélowen!"
I ran to him and hugged him tight. When we released each other, I turned to the other three he had entered with and my spirits for a moment soared. Colindor grinned at me from under his helmet. And throwing back their hoods, Calíme and Emeriel rushed toward me.
"Cali! Em! By grace of the Valar…" I clung tight to them, sobbing with relief.
"Shh, mellon nîn," Emeriel said.
"We're all together. We're all here," Calíme managed to say.
Haldir allowed us a minute before stepping in. "We must leave you now."
Emeriel broke away from Cali and me, a different kind of tear adorning her eyes. Colindor pulled off his helmet and let it fall to the stone floor. She ran to his arms.
"Gerich veleth nîn, Colindor," she whispered.
"I love you too, vanessenya." He gently brushed the tears from her cheek. "I will find you again. I promise. Nothing can keep us apart."
The two betrothed shared a final kiss and Haldir led Colindor away. The doors closed again and we were left along among the refugees. Calíme and I gave Emeriel a few minutes to recover. I could feel her pain, for I was feeling the same. Legolas and Colindor were fighting together and could very possibly die together.
Finally I led her away from the long-closed doors. "Come on Em. We will be safer back in the caves." She just nodded, lost in her thoughts and worry.
I felt better with my friends so near but it was strange. All my life I had longed to be with my own kind. Here I was, hiding with hundreds of human women and children, feeling completely isolated. I still felt guilty over my transformation: my abandonment of the human race.
Calíme and Emeriel felt even more out of place than I did, judging from their expressions. I decided that the three of us needed to stay together and that they could wait before meeting Gauna.
And so we stayed, three Elf-maidens, afraid and, in a room of hundreds, completely alone.
**********
The air was thick with tension. Emeriel, Calíme, and I still sat alone and silent. Finally I could take the silence no more.
"Emeriel, why did you come?" I asked. She looked at me strangely. "I mean, why did you all come? I did not think Lórien had relations with Rohan."
She shook her head. "We don't. It wasn't even Lord Celeborn who sent the warriors."
I was completely lost. "But they are Lórien Elves, right?" Calíme and Emeriel nodded. "Who else could command our warriors?"
"Lady Galadriel has been in close contact with Lord Elrond of Rivendell," Calíme explained. "He bid her to send them."
"Oh."
Emeriel smiled sadly. "The Lord and Lady knew what danger they would face. Colindor and I were called before them and joined in a private ceremony."
I just blinked in surprise, then threw my arms around her. "You are married already! Oh Em, and I missed your wedding! I'm so sorry I couldn't be there!"
"Oh Rae, it's alright!"
Calíme put a hand on my shoulder. "If it makes you feel better, I missed it too and I was still in Lórien."
We all laughed. Emeriel reached under her cloak and withdrew a delicate chain. From it hung a golden pendant, shaped like an open flower. "This is the symbol of our marriage," she explained.
It was breathtaking. The jewel seemed to radiate its own light. A light that represented pure joy despite the surroundings – dark caves full of despair. "It's beautiful, Em," I finally said.
"Thank you." She hid the jewel back under her cloak. "After our marriage, Galadriel gave me permission to accompany the warriors to Helms Deep. I think she knew you were here, Rae. She knew we'd be safe together."
I smiled and nodded. "Cali, she gave you permission to come, too?"
"Uh…" Cali laughed. "Not really. I kinda just decided to tag along." I must have looked kind of confused because she shot me a hurt look. "Do you really think I'd stay in Lórien alone? While my two best friends leave to pursue more important things?" Her tone, laced with sarcasm and hurt, stung like salt on a wound.
I didn't know how to respond. Em and I shared a look of confusion and guilt, completely unsure of how to console our friend.
But Calíme's mood brightened as suddenly as it had become dark. She studied me strangely. "Rae?" she asked awed. "What's happened to you?"
"What do you mean?" I asked.
Now Emeriel was studying me as well. "She's right! You look different. Almost radiant."
I rolled my eyes. "Look around us, Emeriel! Everywhere I look, I see suffering, not to mention that Legolas could very well die tonight! What could I possibly be that happy about?"
"No," Calíme said. "Not like happy-radiant. Like…bright-radiant." She reached out to touch my hair. "You have your own light," she whispered.
'Ohh!' I thought. 'I think I get it.' I just grinned. Actually, there is something I should tell you." My two friends awaited my response eagerly and I continued. "Legolas and I – "
"You're getting married?" Calíme cried. "Oh Rae, that's wonderful!"
Laughing, I shook my head. "No Cali. Well maybe. But not…no."
"Oh. Just kidding!" Cali quieted down again. I paused and took a deep breath before continuing. She and Emeriel watched me intently, waiting for whatever news I had for them.
My hands unconsciously rested on my stomach, as I looked straight at my two friends. "Em, Cali…I'm pregnant."
* Elen sila lumen omentilmo = A star shall shine upon the hour of our meeting (Quenya)
Gerich ui-veleth nîn = You have my everlasting love (Sindarin…the Quenya didn't sound as good)
Nálve ullume = We are forever (Quenya)
Sii nán lemba, mornie utúlië = Now I am left behind, darkness has come (Quenya)
Niiri lantane e Eleni = Tears fall from the stars (Quenya)
Aare quela an morne = Sunlight fades to black (Quenya)
Ananta er aure omentuva ata = But yet one day we will meet again (Quenya)
Ar alasse ar galad tuuva = And joy and light will find you (Quenya)
Tenna enyaare, namaarie = Until then, farewell (Quenya)
* Mae govannen = Welcome (literally "well met") (Sindarin)
* Mellon nîn = my friend (Sindarin)
* Gerick veleth nîn = you have my love (Sindarin) stolen from Two Towers conversation between Arwen and Elrond
* Vanessenya = my beauty (Quenya)
