Authors note: Not so bad with timing this time! Dialogue written like this – 'blah blah blah' is thoughts, just so there's no confusion. Thank you all for the reviews, I can't tell you how much I appreciate them. More will be coming soon! Hope you like.
"I'm hungry," she told him softly.
They were sitting side by side on the floor, not touching.
"Means you're normal," he said. "Every newly raised vamp's hungry, urge drives them crazy sometimes. You're remarkably sane, love."
He offered her a smile, almost sad in it's fakeness.
"Spike…I don't want to kill anyone."
Pretense of joviality aside, he touched her shoulder gently.
"You won't have to. Just stop the nearest passerby, take a drink, let them go. No harm done."
"No harm done?" She repeated incredulously. "You're talking about biting into an innocent person, here, you realize that? With the casualness one might use to suggest taking a bite out of an apple!"
"It wouldn't ki-"
"So as long as they're still breathing in the end, it's all good?"
"Well….yeah," Spike said, shrugging. Then abruptly changed his mind. "I mean, no. That would be bad – and immoral."
"Yes, it would," she agreed, eyes glinting dangerously.
Her stomach growled, and Elizabeth's face changed, ridges replacing the smooth skin of her forehead. She whimpered in distress.
"I wont let you starve yourself," Spike growled.
"And I wont let myself hurt anyone," she shot back, just as determined.
Inexplicitly, his eyes softened and he smiled.
"Then I've got just the solution. Bite me."
"What?" she breathed out.
"I'm here," Spike pressed, stepping closer to her. "Volunteering, I am. Won't hurt me, and it'll help you."
The white curve of his throat gleamed and Buffy felt a pulling in her gut, something instinctive, urging her to just bite in and –
"B-but, blood? It's so…coppery and disgusting. I n-never even liked sucking on cuts, Spike."
He smiled kindly, placing one hand at the back of her neck and pressing her foreward.
"It won't be disgusting. I promise."
Her mind urged her to resist, but her body rebelled, stubbornly bringing her closer. She traced her fingers down the side of his neck, and a slight rumble erupted from his chest. Confused, she did it again, and he didn't disappoint.
"Get to the biting, eh?" he teased lightly, trying and failing to stop that humiliating purring sound from bursting out.
"Uh-huh," she replied, lost in exploration. Her mouth followed the trail of her hands and Spike forced himself to be still, to let her have time to explore. Even when – Holy Christ! Hot tongue running along his neck, tasting his skin, then the pinpricks of fangs as she positioned them right above his jugular.
Buffy took an unnecessary breath, letting his scent cloud her nostrils and offer reassurance. Then, carefully lining up her new fangs where she wanted them, she closed her eyes and bit down.
Blood flooded her mouth and she flinched, preparing herself for the sharp metallic taste that never came. Instead…she moaned, trying to figure out what it tasted like. Certainly not like any food she'd ever had in her mouth, but like life. And Spike. The essence of Spike. And it was delicious.
He moved beneath her, hands flying over her body as he moaned words into her neck, but she couldn't make them out over the rushing in her ears.
Buffy pressed closer, trying to feel all of him at once as she pulled on the wound. Flashes went off in front of her eyes and she tried to focus, because they looked so familiar…
//Flash//
A pale haired man, clutching scattered leafs of paper to his chest.
//Flash//
A woman throwing the paper back at him, disgust radiating from her.
//Flash//
Another woman this time, long dark hair, escaping the world, effulgent.
Buffy felt burning on her scalp as though something acidic was being poured on her head. Felt waves of jealousy, resentment, and love, so much love that it seemed like it always needed to be directed somewhere.
She broke free of his neck with a gasp and slid off his lap. Spike started, dimly registering that she was no longer on top of him.
"Buffy?"
She was on the floor, trembling and muttering words he couldn't hear. Kneeling beside her, he whipped some remaining blood of her lip and tasted it, smiling at the merging of their scents.
"I-I felt you," she whispered. "It was like we were connected, like I could see into you."
His face lit up in a shy smile, but the next second it was gone.
"Spike? You know what happened, don't you."
"It's nothing," he muttered, looking anywhere but at her.
"It's not nothing! I saw you. Saw this girl, with curly hair, and saw these words floating around. I saw how she hurt you," she finished softly.
"Doesn' matter now," he assured. "It's just – your…demon, I suppose, making a claim on my demon."
"But – what?"
"It's a vamp thing, love. Doesn't need to mean anything, since it hasn't been exactly finalized."
"This is what you were talking about with the mating, wasn't it? That I didn't sense you before because it was my slayer trying to claim you. But she couldn't, because I wasn't a vampire. But now that I am…"
She almost smiled at how flustered he looked.
"I know you said that you wanted to be mine," he mumbled. "But – doesn't have to mean anything, when you said it you didn't know it would actually be…possible. If you don't –"
"Why wouldn't I?"
He shrugged, looking everywhere but at her.
"Spike?" she asked, taking his chin in his hands. "How would you do a mating? Just for…just in case."
"Don' know exactly, pet. When two vamps are connected – biting each other, I mean – there's these words that are supposed to come out, or this…something. And if both are willing, the mating is done."
"Right," she said, studiously nodding. "Spike, please sit down."
Frowning, he sat, looking at her in confusion.
Buffy gave him a reassuring smile, and climbed onto his lap. She briefly wondered where this self assuredness was coming for – climbing onto a man's knees without a second thought! But somehow it didn't matter anymore. Rules, regulations, all those things she was taught seemed unnecessary suddenly. What was the point?
She led his mouth to her neck and he gave her a quizzical glance.
"Vamp," she commanded, doing so herself without even realizing she'd made the change.
He did as requested, and she gave him one last smile before gently kissing the tip of his nose.
"I love you Spike," she said simply. "More than anything in the world, and I want to have you by my side forever."
His cheeks turned maroon and he opened his mouth, before closing it again with a click.
"Y-you're sure?" At her nod, he relaxed, allowing his own smile to bloom. "Well baby, in that case…"
His fangs were in her neck before she could register movement, and she moaned aloud at the feeling of him inside her, intensified by what she knew he was feeling on the other end. Remembering herself, she found her previous marks and slid her fangs in, delighting in the sensations rippling through her.
Permission was asked for and granted, without either being aware of it. A jot ran through Buffy and she broke loose, panting. Spike lost contact a second later, feeling it too.
They kissed, fangs cutting against lips. Spike hauled her closer, needing there to be no space between them, just skin on skin. The fabric in the way was removed and sent sailing, and they both sighed when the last barrier was breached.
They parted slowly, savoring the feelings.
"We're naked," Buffy commented.
'Yeah,' Spike agreed, holding her tightly against him.
She started.
"You…I can hear your thoughts?"
'All part of the mating process, pet.'
"What else is part of the mating process…oohh…"
Sensation gushed into her, and she nearly screamed at the intensity. It prickled beneath her eyelids and rang in fireworks throughout her body, lighting her up with feeling. It felt like her skin was being ripped away but there was no pain, as another spirit was pressed tightly against hers, together in every way. She couldn't tell where she ended and where he began, and it was the most wonderful feeling. A part of him, a piece of his very being, was embedded into hers, and she welcomed it with a smile.
"Spike," she gasped. "Spike."
"Yeah, love," he whimpered against her. "I feel it too."
As suddenly as it started, it was gone. But he was still there. Still with her, inside of her.
'Can you hear me?' she tried, experimentally.
'Loud and clear, Buffy. And can you…'
'Oh God. It's like – I feel you, you're in me. It's –'
'Bloody marvelous,' he put in for her.
'Exactly,' she agreed.
