Little Sisters Have No Fun

Chapter 8: Getaway

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Author's Note: I'd like to dedicate this chapter to Chrissy, my greatest beta reader! Thanks so much!! Also the prank is revealed in this chapter. Did I do Lily justice?

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Lily grimaced. She could hear Alfred yelling her name. Why does he always assume that it's me? She rolled her eyes. Oh yeah…

She looked outside the door and what do her eyes see but a homicidal Alfred barreling down the corridor. His destination: her room. His plan: most likely to kill his little cousin.

He deserves it. Realizing that the man with murderous intentions was rather too close for comfort to her location, she slammed the door shut and leaned up against it.

Well at least he's not going to really kill me. Oh wait yes, that is on his agenda, isn't it. Suddenly the prank did not seem like that great of an idea. Scratch that, it seemed like a really, really bad idea. But why is he overreacting? I always play pranks on him and his never tried to kill me... or appear this mad anyways. He always burst out laughing and played a prank back on her.

Crap! Scheiβe! Shitmatta! Crap! Shivers ran up her spine as she glanced around her room for an escape route, she spotted a chair nearby that she grabbed and stuck under the doorknob. Moving quickly to the window, she silently cursed the fact that she lived on the second floor. Damn it. She also cursed the fact that she was wearing heavy dresses and petticoats. Stupid dresses. Stupid corsets. Stupid being a girl!! She smirked. Though it's a hell of a lot better than being a boy!!

Lily looked out of the window and smiled. What, in the nine hells, are the odds of that? She grabbed the branch of the tree and hoisted herself onto it. The door was creaking as Alfred pounded and rammed against it and Lily knew she had to hurry. Her hands moved to the branch above the one she sat on and used it as leverage to pull herself to her feet.

Thankfully, it was a sturdy branch and she was able to walk to the trunk. Back in her room, wood broke and a door scattered. Alfred angrily stepped onto the threshold.

"Lily!" Alfred screeched.

I can't believe he's that angry over that little prank. It was a good prank though. She smiled evilly at the memory:

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She slipped into Alfred's room with her supplies in a small bag that was slung over her right shoulder. She turned back to the door and quietly closed it behind her. Her eyes looked over Alfred's room, assessing it before an evil grin lit up her face. She began to pull things out of the bag.

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Looking over her handiwork, Lily grinned in triumph. Alfred's bed now was dyed a horrifying shade of pink along with the majority of his clothes. The other clothes were colored a variety of girlish colors including purples and light blues and yellows. The variety made the room look like something out of one of those horrifying Easter and Spring parties her father made her go to. In addition, little hearts decorated the edges between the ceiling and walls and the collars of his shirts. That had taken awhile but she decided that the effect made it worthwhile. It was the work of a master prankster and was truly horrifying if you were boy trying to prove that you're a man. And Alfred was no man at least in any normal girl's eyes. On his bed she placed a heart shaped card with a drawing (she was quite the artist when she wanted to be) of Robin Hood on it. Along the edge of it she wrote 'Long live Robin Hood! Down with Prince John, the Sheriff and all his lackeys!'

She found it bloody ironic. And she loved it.

As she left, her bag was a lot heavier… with his underwear. Shame she couldn't see his reaction when he went to get dressed on the morrow.

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Of course, he probably hadn't realized that they were missing yet. Loser. But the best pranks revealed themselves at the opportune moment.

Lily looked back into her room. Their eyes locked. She froze. He knows.

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She pulled a red heart out of the bag of supplies. It had taken a little while longer to prepare than other supplies had. She kissed it and grinned with a sinister aura surrounding her. One thought filled her mind: Evil Alfred was going down. She gently set it down on the bed. And with that the room was complete. She stepped back to survey her work.

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She jumped out the window. Her skirts caught some of the air but she still fell fast. She landed cat-style and looked up and the window. Alfred's face appeared filled with anger and loathing and they darkened his features.

"Lily!"

She scrambled to her feet and ran to the stables. If she could get Rose, she could get away.

"Lily! Daddy's dead! You're next, little cousin! You're going to be dead! I promise you! I know you know!!"

She turned to look at him. "Congratulations, genius! You're scheme isn't going to work and you messed with the wrong sister's boyfriend!" She turned and continued to run with out slowing she grabbed a saddle and a bridle. As fast as she could she tacked Rose who, being the intelligent animal that she was, sensed the urgency and stood still while Lily quickly dealt with the buckles and latches. She jumped onto the saddle and adjusted her skirts while leading Rose out into the yard. Once there she saw Alfred running out into the yard.

What a slow piece of crap!

She kicked Rose into a canter and they took off. A couple strides later a full gallop broke out. They ran to Sherwood together. Well sort of, Lily was sitting on Rose's back trying not to fall off due to her stupid skirts.

They broke into the woods and were soon intercepted by Robin Hood and his merry men. She gasped out her story and when she got to the window scene she broke out in tears.

Her father was dead.

Her only living guardian was dead.

All she had was a stupid sister who everyone thought was perfect and her outlaw boyfriend.

She was so screwed.

She might as well have been all alone for what they were worth.

She just wanted to go back to be normal. Stupid, stupid Cousin Alfred! Stupid Sheriff! … … Stupid Prince John!!!!

Somebody had to solve this. And it probably was going to be her.

Prince John is going down. Hell yeah!!