Woo! Sorry for such a long delay, it's just you know… there was this movie that came out on Tuesday…I don't know if any of you have heard of it. Wasn't really that big. It was actually pretty good. About pirates and gold and this blacksmith guy… There was this really hot pirate guy, but he wore eyeliner so I don't know…

Eh

So there is my crappy excuse for not updating this story in a while.

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"I am going to kill you Jack Sparrow." I seethed through my teeth. I think he thought I was kidding though.

"Oh Pet, you know you wouldn't want to do that." He replied wrapping his arms around me.

"No, I really think I do." I said unclasping his arm from around my shoulder.

He grabbed both of my shoulders though and leaned down right in my face. "No, you see because if you did-then I couldn't have the honor of being with you."

An honor? Did he just say honor? Was he trying to brown nose me?!

"Well alright then...?" Cherice said turning towards Legolas. "Anyway-Legolas! Waddya say me and you go-uh-below decks eh?" she walked over to him and looped her arm through his.

Then something really weird happened. Legolas kinda went all misty eyed and a goofy looking grin was formed really quick. "Yes, I believe I do."

I arched my eyebrow as they both turned around and headed for the door to below. Melissa and I both turned our backs on Jack and stared at the two as they disappeared below. There was a moment of silence before Jack found his voice.

"Hay mate! You better not use my bed!"

I slapped my forehead as Melissa did the same. "So what the hell was that all about?" I asked turning to face her. "I mean last time I checked Legolas wasn't taking too kindly to Cherice's sexually frightening advances."

Melissa turned positively green as she described something so kinky and interesting, that if I wrote it here, the computer would explode in a fiery mess and rot forever in the pits of hell.

All I can say about it is it made the wheels in Jack's head start to turn.

"Bloody hell." Jack said wide eyed. He then turned to me and said. "Hey pet, you wanna try that some time?"

I looked at him with a 'I can't believe you just said that to me' look. Honor. Ha! My ass!

"Yea right. Why don't you try me again when a nice big 'ol ship from the East India Trading Company floats on by, captures us, and plants a nice big P on my arm then savvy?" I asked totally believing that this would never happen. I then immediately slapped my forehead because I realized that he was wearing off on me.

"Do you mean that?" Jack asked sounding very sincere.

"It's a promise." I replied unknowingly with my head in my hands.

"Well can we do it here on deck? And quick cuz you know these guys are pretty fast and they will catch up pretty quick."

"What are you talking about?" I heard Melissa ask.

I looked up from my hands and at Jack as he smiled at me and pointed behind me. I slowly turned around to face his point. Sure enough, there was a ship. It was a nice ship actually; too bad I was about to be branded a pirate by it. Oh I could have killed Jack.

I let out a string of swears so long and vulgar that I think I even surprised Jack. I couldn't believe that this was actually coming true. There was NO WAY in hell I wanted to-um-do that very bad thing Melissa had described with Jack.

"THERE is NO way in HELL that, that is them!" Melissa shrieked running to the side of the ship and leaning over the railing.

"You have to be shitting me." I said staring wide eyed at the fast approaching ship.

"Oh no love, I know them when I see them. You see…I have met up with them before." Jack replied pulling up his shirtsleeve and showing me the P branded on his own arm.

"I CAN'T BE BRANDED A FLIPPIN PIRATE!" I screamed grabbing on to his shoulders.

"PET! CALM DOWN!" Jack said wrapping his arms around me.

I was freaking out completely. Kinda strange because I had chosen THIS time to freak out, and not at the point where I had first seen Jack. No, I mean seeing Jack Sparrow just appear in my math class wouldn't freak me out as much as a ship coming at me. No, not at all.

I pulled myself out of his arms and pulled at the one with the P on it.

"This can't be happening." I mumbled studying it.

"I can't have a P burned into my beautiful skin!" Melissa cried not paying any heed to Jack or me. "This is utter crap!"

"Fuck." I whined looking back up at Jack. He actually kinda looked a little sympathetic, his forehead was furrowed together and I almost thought that I was

glad that I had wished for him.

Then he broke out in a giant grin and grabbed me around the waist. "Speaking of which." He pulled me close and growled in my ear, "A promise is a promise pet." 

"ARG!" I screamed pushing myself out of his arms. I started to back up as I yelled, "FUCK NO!"

I took another step back, as he took one forward smiling very hard. Unfortunately I didn't see the rope that I was about to trip over. So I went sprawling on my back, which believe you me, is not the best position to be in with a pirate around. Especially one like Jack.

"AHHHRG!" I screamed as Jack jumped onto my stomach and pinned my arms over my head.

"Oh quit your whining," Jack said leaning down, I would guess to kiss me.

"MELISSA! HELP ME!" I yelled turning my head so that Jack's lips came in contact with my hair.

Melissa turned around slowly and looked at the position I was in. Her face cracked out in a mad grin as she replied, "And why the hell would you need help?"

I widened my eyes at her. Since that day I still haven't forgiven her for it.

Ok that's a lie.

But still. I wasn't too happy at the time.

I turned my head again to face Jack as he said, "See?" and smirked.

I had to think fast about what I was going to do because it looked like he was going in for another go at kissing me. So I did, and I realized that Legolas was kind of partial to keeping us safe from Jack. So I screamed-"LEGOLAAAAAS!!!! HEEEEEEELLLLLPPPP MEEEEEEEE!"

Seconds later I heard thumping across the deck and saw the glint of a knife pressed against Jack's throat.

There was a silent moment as Jack stopped and stared at me wide eyed. His eyes then slowly slid up to Legolas, who was looking really lethal like.

Then I heard Melissa start laughing. Really hard.

"BUAHAHAH! OH MY GOD!" she screamed.

"What the hell is wrong with you?!" I yelled noticing there were several sails from the India ship peeking over the railing.

"You guys are just the funniest thing I have seen ever!" she replied bending over and laughing like a maniac.

I looked up and thought about it. There I was with a pirate straddling me, and an elf (who was, I just noticed, clad only in pants) holding a knife to the pirate's neck. I immediately broke out laughing. It was kinda funny.

Jack started to laugh too, but stopped when Legolas pressed the knife a little harder. "Get off of her." He whispered menacingly.

Oh how I loved the elf at that moment.

"WHAT THE FUCK IS GOING ON HERE?!" I heard Cherice yell from behind me. I turned my head back and saw her standing there with her shirt on inside out and her shoes in her hand.

"Ship." I heard Melissa say. Once again I turned my head to see Melissa pointing in the direction of the sails, which I noticed were a lot bigger.

"Shit." Jack mumbled pushing Legolas' knife aside and rolling off me. I sat up and Jack did something kind of weird. He extended his hand to help me up. I looked at it for a moment, before looking up at him. "What?" he said pushing his hand into my face. "I am trying to help you up, is that ok?"

I blinked at him trying to understand what he was getting at. Shrugging I grabbed his hand and he pulled me to my feet.

"Thanks." I said looking in his eyes. They were kind of nice…like chocolate almost.

"Yea." He replied sadly turning. I have no idea why he was sad. Oh wait, yes I do. It was because of the ship whose crew was beginning to board the Pearl.

"HUDDLE!" Melissa screamed.

Cherice and I immediately ran over to Melissa and huddled up with her. "Ok, what do we do?" Cherice whispered quickly glancing over to her elf, who was trying to fend several men off. "I don't have much time to make up a brilliantly exquisite plan."

"We could try and fight." Melissa whispered.

"No. We don't know how." I replied.

"Yea, that would help if we did, wouldn't it?" Melissa said looking downcast.

"I say on the count of three we all split up and run around shitless for a while. See what happens then. Sound good?" I asked noticing Legolas and Jack had been taken and were being tied up. Also that there were a few guys coming straight for us.

The two looked to each other and nodded. "Agreed" they both said looking back at me.

The officers were about two feet away from us, and I decided that there was no time for one let alone two, "THREE!" I screamed breaking apart from them. I hightailed it to the nearest rope ladder and started to climb. Now I know what you all are thinking-(isn't it weird how I do that so often?) 'Why would you climb a rope ladder when the guys could easily get you, Mary?' well first off, my name isn't Mary. Second, yes they could easily see me, but only one dude could climb the rope at a time. And with a good kick of my foot could easily be knocked down.

And everything was going well, until I realized that I was really high up. Now as mentioned previous I am rather afraid of heights, so I froze. "Holy fuck." I whimpered looking down. Unfortunately for me, since I had become a frozen statue like thing, the guy under me caught up to me, grabbed my ankle and started to pull…HARD.

And since I was all unprepared and unawares, I lost my grip and fell to the deck.

All I remember before falling into the land of All That is Fuzzy Then Black, is Jack yelling. "MELISSA!" and me thinking 'Awww isn't that nice?'

And then all there was, was fuzzy then black.

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ouch that was long.