That Mockingbird Won't Sing
A week later after a certain few incidents which included a Danger Room session gone wrong and an island that literally wanted to eat them alive John Proudstar found himself reluctantly back in English class. "I still don't see why I have to teach this class," John groaned.
"Co-teach," Hank told him. "I will be assisting you. Let's face it we have too few instructors around here and maybe I can train you to some degree so you can do more than just teach gym. Especially since Logan is more than proficient in that department!"
"Yeah but my classes weren't that bad," John huffed.
"Not that bad?" Hank whirled on him. "Thunderbird, in less than a week you drove Kurt crazy, incited a few minor riots, destroyed several books for target practice, got mutants banned from another eating institution, gained us several more angry phone calls with the police department and their lawyers, encouraged a gambling ring in class and worst of all, YOU TRASHED SHAKESPEARE! Need I say more?"
"You forgot watching soaps in class," John reminded him.
"Well actually I didn't," Hank sighed. "I have to concur it's been a really good week lately. I still can't believe Jane ended up marrying her fiancée's father!"
"I told you she was a gold digger," John said as the kids entered the classroom.
"All right class now I know we're a little behind," Hank addressed the classroom. "So why don't we just jump right in on the book To Kill A Mockingbird by Harper Lee?"
"Oh god no I hate that book!" John groaned.
"What on earth do you have against To Kill A Mockingbird?" Hank asked. "It's about compassion in a world filled with bigotry and hatred!"
"Well for starters it's a bit unrealistic," John said. "The narrator is supposed to be a kid but she sounds more like an adult!"
"You mean more adult than some adults," Hank quipped. "John this is the perfect book for children. It teaches not to judge people by appearances."
"Yeah that really worked well with the black guy on trial," John remarked. "There's tons of evidence that he was innocent but he was sentenced to jail and shot to death anyway! Yeah there's justice for you!"
"Well…" Hank felt a little uncomfortable.
"And of course the one sane decent white guy in town is targeted just for sticking up for him," John remarked. "His kids are even attacked for crying out loud! You know what message it sends? It says that anybody in the minority is a target from the majority! Yeah there's a great lesson for mutants!"
"Okay I'll concede on that but…" Hank tried to ignore the amused looks of the students.
"And that Everell guy that started all this," John continued. "He ruined nearly everyone's lives in the book. His daughter, the guy he framed, even Atticus' kids! It just shows you how people with just a little power can use it to make those who are weaker than they are miserable!"
"Sounds like another book we talked about," Sam grinned.
"You do make some valid points," Hank said. "But all the same…"
"And those stupid little escapades those kids go on," John grumbled. "Yeah they were amusing but they had no real place in the book!"
"You tell 'em teach!" Bobby said. "Hey maybe Boo Radley was really a mutant?"
"Oh no!" Hank held up his hand. "We are not getting on that subject! We'll be here all night arguing it!"
"All the same the movie with Gregory Peck was better," John waved.
"Hey did you watch that greatest heroes and villains in the movies special?" Jamie asked. "Atticus Finch was the greatest hero and Hannibal Lecter was the worst villain!"
"Okay Lecter I'm not surprised," Tabitha said. "But I was sure Indiana Jones was number one!"
"Nah he got robbed," Jesse told her.
"Hey maybe there should be a cage match between Atticus and Hannibal Lecter!" Sam suggested.
"Yeah that would be cool!" Ray shouted. "Atticus would give him a rib crusher while Hannibal tries to eat his face off!"
"Hannibal would wipe the floor with him," Tabitha said.
"Nuh uh!" Paige snapped. "I think Atticus would come on top!"
"Yeah he'd really lay the smack down on him!" Ray said. "Hey we can make that a project of some kind! Like Celebrity Deathmatch!"
"Oh wow yeah!" Bobby shouted. "That would be so awesome! We could have Atticus have some kind of super gavel as a weapon and Hannibal would have like a cooking fork or something!"
"Yeah and it could be a cage match and everything!" Jamie shouted.
"Well with a cannibal around you wouldn't want him loose or anything," John remarked. "Better put some barbed wire and sharks around the tank just in case."
"PROUDSTAR!" Hank shouted.
"What?" John asked. "You want them to get excited about literature right?"
"Oh yes that's all we need," Hank moaned. "Two fictional characters in a cage deathmatch. Yeah that's the message we're trying to convey here."
"We're supposed to teach them some kind of message?" John asked.
"Never mind!" Hank moaned. "Maybe we should do another book…"
