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Chapter 3
Logan stood out looking the city, as usual, holding a cup of coffee, since long cooled down in his hands. He sighed, looking over at his computers, as a sting of guilt washed over him. Who was he to turn away from the informant net, when he was facing some personal problems? People could die because of his- or rather Eyes Only's- absence... but right now he just didn't give a damn.
Even though much of his life revolved around Eyes Only and the world around it, he needed to be able to get away from it, at least for a few days. Right now he couldn't handle everything, the memories flooding over him like the Niagara falls switched up.
As he observed the always turned of computers, he inwardly sighed, forgetting about his memories for a while as he thought about Max. He had been awfully rude to her last night, shouting at her, blaming her for something she didn't deserve. All she wanted was to know what was the matter of him- which stuck him as a bit out of the ordinary as she usually gave it a rest when he said it was nothing- and he had practically thrown her out of his apartment.
He was ashamed over his actions, but couldn't take them back. And he wasn't even sure that a nice, candle- lit dinner for two when he had gotten his head cleared out, would fix it. He blamed himself for it, for pushing her further away from him, that wasn't what he wanted, not at all, not close.
If he could decide, Max would be his. That he wouldn't have to share her with the world, that he could just keep her close to him, close and hug her, kiss her, just love her. But as he knew Max and her free spirit and need for privacy, he wasn't sure that was ever gonna happen.
At least not if everything kept on this way.
He pushed those thoughts aside for the moment, walking into his bedroom. He pulled out the top drawer, where he kept small things- all from pens, note pads, deodorants, whatever- and photographs.
He picked one in particular up, the wooden frame still around it. God, when had he last had this one out? Perhaps not since last year, perhaps before that. It was a good picture. He stood there in the middle, in between his father and mother, grinning like an idiot. He hadn't worn glasses then, either.
It was hard for him to remember the pre- pulse time, as it always brought back memories of his family, or old friends and flings, that he now didn't keep the contact with. He wasn't sure if he was supposed to feel failure about that, it was he who had chosen solitude after Valerie had left him, he who had chosen to move to the pent house and later on adapt his two-faced personality; becoming the world's most pissed off reporter, as someone he knew well had put it.
He smiled at the memory, walking out of his bedroom. He brought the framed photography with him, placing it beside his computers. He turned and observed it again, then went to the kitchen to put it away...
Perhaps he was as pathetic as Valerie had called him. But now, more than ever, he felt lonely. Perhaps he needed comforting, something he wouldn't let people give him. A part of him would like to cry on another persons shoulders, a very specified person, but at the same time didn't want to show that kind of weakness.
God, he had to get through this...
***
" Max, how much has Logan told you about his parents, and family's death?"
Max shrugged, her shoulders going up and down. Logan had never told her much about it, and she had never asked much. She knew they had run aground when their boat's Satellite Navigation System had collapsed, but that was about it. He had never told her more about it, not who had made it through it and who hadn't... But she was beginning to get the picture.
" Not much. He told me that their boat ran aground when the Pulse hit, but that's just about it..." Bling nodded, looking down at his hands. He honestly didn't know where to start, but as Max knew the basics he decided to just tell her the necessary; spare some of the details. But then again, Max knew Logan almost better than himself and cared for him like no one he'd ever seen before, so she deserved the truth, and to know at least as much as he.
" Well, is there somewhere we can go and talk about it?" Max, nodded and motioned for him to begin walking again, as did she. " Crash is usually quiet at this hour."
When they reached Crash about ten minutes later, Max showed him a table in one of the corner's of Crash. She had ordered a Coke for herself, and Bling, being himself, had ordered a mineral water. Harold had brought them in an instant, and Max walked over with the drinks to Bling. She sat down, opening her coke.
" I have to be off soon, so I'll only tell what I know. " Max nodded, continuing to down her coke. Bling tapped his fingers against the glass of the sparkling mineral water, as if he wasn't sure where to begin, but then he did.
" Logan was 21, I think. Just finished studying at Harvard, graduated from there with top records. His parents arranged a boat trip for the three of them- they were only three in his family- to celebrate it, and he accepted. " Max cut in to Bling's surprise; " Logan also mentioned there was a lady friend. True, right?" Bling looked at her, and if the subject had been any lighter, he would have smiled at the jealousy in Max's voice, probably undetected by herself.
" Yeah, he brought along a lady friend as well, " Bling continued. " Anyway, they lended his Uncle's yacht and did this. When the Pulse hit, the Satellite Navigation System on the boat crashed down, making the boat un-controllable. They tried turning off the auto-pilot and everything... but soon they got too close to the rocks, on too shallow water. So the boat ran aground, with the four of them on it. "
Max listened intently, forgetting about the Coke in her hand. She had put it down since long ago, paying all attention to Bling and what he was telling her. " What happened?" She asked.
" I don't know the details there, Max, Logan wasn't big on them. All I know was that Logan and that lady friend of his were the only ones who made it out when the boat ran aground, alive. His parents died; their bodies were found when the police searched the waters. Apparently, they had been thrown overboard or something..."
So, that was why Logan never told her anything about himself; he was afraid of doing so would automatically lead into the topic of his parents and their death. Listening to all this, Max instantly knew that Logan was feeling guilt about this, perhaps that was why he had taken on himself to be Eye's Only; to make sure that those who deserved it would pay.
" Listen, Max, I don't know any more than that... and the reason that Logan got angry yesterday night was probably that it was exactly on the day from when it happened. He never grieves, but I guess it gets too much to handle for him sometimes; tough, bottled-up ol' Logan. "
Max nodded, knowing what Bling was saying was right. She wasn't angry at Logan anymore, no how could she? She longed for a family all her life, to desperately know her mother amongst that, and Logan's had been taken away from him. She didn't blame him a bit, know, she actually understood him.
" If I were you, I would go and see him. He's most likely cooled off by now, and I've got the feeling he's feeling very alone at the moment. Go cheer him up!" Max stood from the chair and smiled towards Bling, patting him gently on the shoulder, as to thank him. He returned the smile and nodded to her.
" You know what? That's exactly what I'm gonna do...."
Author's Note: Next chapter, Max goes to see Logan about a heart to heart...
MaxCale - Thanks girl!
Original D - Yeah, in the show we never really got to se him that frustrated, and I just thought it would be funny, interesting to imagine him like that, one of the reason I did it. Remember that MA's are the real fictionous believers, since we all know who Max really ended up with ;)
Angie 731 – I hope you didn't have to sit on that chair too long ;) Usually, my average update period for a fic like this is about 4 days. It can change, but that's the average! Thanks for the detail remark; I try the best I can!
Idlehands452- And there you got it ;)
M/L Only – You also got more, and more is to come!
Review, please, it helps more chapters get uploaded faster and it's always nice to know what you thought about the story.
