Disclaimer: Don't own my friends, or LOTR. And I don't own Bohemian Rhapsody...That would belong to Queen. I don't own POTC either. Good enough? Better be...

Side Nonsense

*THUMP*

'GAH!! I knew I shouldn't have mocked that orc...' Merenwen thought to herself as she found herself in a small clearing, with an orc charging at her.  His blade swooped to her side, however she managed to jump over it. 'I knew jumping rope as a girl would somehow help me in the future.' She thought. "HA!" Merenwen laughed at his inability to strike her.

"RAAAAAAHHHHHH!!!!!!" He growled as he swung his scimitar. He managed to graze his target.

"GAH! THAT WAS MY LEG!! Llie n'vanima ar' lle atara lanneina!!!! Are you trying to SKIN me?? Or kill me here?!" She teased. "Now you're gonna get it!!!"

Elvish Subtitles – You're ugly, and your mother dresses you funny.

But before she could go all Aragorn on the orc, she saw Arallahmenorah, sitting on a large stone, watching her battle. "Are..*dodge* you... *swish/clang*...just...*dodge/strike*...gonna...*strike*...SIT THERE?! TUA AMIN!"

E.S – HELP ME!

"Awwwwww......I don't wanna help! I'm quite comfortable sitting here. But if you say so..." She leaped from her stone, whipped out her daggers, and began ferociously began swipping at the orc.

"AAAAHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!" The orc ran away...limping.

"Jeeze, I said to help me, not cripple the darn thing."

"Well, ya shoulda been more specific!!" replied Arallahmenorah.

"Hmm...I s'pose so. Any ways, Whatdaya say we go to my house?"

"I say...*eyes light up*...*eyes dulled and she looks to the ground*...what was the question??"

"Me! You! My place! Wanna go?" Merenwen said.

"Sure! I haven't been to there in awhile."

"Iire?" Merenwen asked.

E.S – Where?

"Aiya, amin feuya ten'lle. " Arallahmenorah grabbed Merenwen's wrist and began to pull her down the path.

E.S – Oh, you disgust me.

"Sii' tanya awra." Merenwen said as they were walking.

E.S – Now that hurt.

"Hiraetha." Arallahmenorah said.

E.S – Sorry.

They soon reached Merenwen's tree. Merenwen doesn't have a house, she has a tree. Her tree is quite wide, and hollow, she literally lives in a tree. Her house overlooks Anduin. They climb up a set of stairs that had been carved into the outside of the tree. They reach the door, and find that it's already open.

"You guys!!" Merenwen says as she finds Ereon, Radiion, and D'elph at her house...watching POTC.

"Hey you're home!!" Ereon jumped up off the couch.

"Where'd ya go?" asked Radiion.

"She went and got into a fight with yet another orc." Explained Arallahmenorah.

"But he started it!!" Merenwen proceeded to whine.

"No, he didn't!!" Arallahmenorah argued.

"How long were you watching me exactly??"

"Long enough to see you throwing pebbles at the orc, and calling him a nadorhuan."

E.S – Cowardly dog

"Oh...well then."

"Hey how come she gets to fight all the orcs???" asked D'elph.

"Because...I can." Replied Merenwen, calmly.

"Well so can I you know!!"

"No you can't."

"Why not?"

"Because I said so."

"So? Since when do I listen do you??"

"Since never, but you gotta start sometime."

"DROP IT!!!" shouted everyone else in the room.

"So how'd ya'll get in?? I thought I locked the door..." said Merenwen.

"Well...Legolas took it upon himself to make copies of your house key...so we'd all leave him alone, and hang at your house." Explained Radiion. Everyone held out they're copies. Merenwen turns and looks at Arallahmenorah. "Did you get one too??"

She looks at the ground sadly. "No..."

Ereon pulls a key at of her pocket. The key was engraved with the words "Arallahmenorah's Merenwen's Place Key". As a matter of fact, everyone's key was personalized with their names on them. Ereon hands Arallahmenorah her key.

"Yippee!!!" she dances around with her key.

Just then Mellaquiimm burst through the door. "DUDES! I HAVE NOT HAD A GOOD DAY!!!" She walks in, kicks off her boots, walks into the kitchen. You hear the refrigerator open, then close, and the sound of someone opening a can of soda. She comes back out with some orange soda, and she plops on the couch.

"Ok, I was riding up from Rohan. Eomer's away at some battle. And I run into my army of evil squirrels. So I was like 'MY MINIONS!!!' and they all stood at attention, which was pretty cool. But anyhow, the #1 nut man goes up to me, and he's all 'chip chip chip chip' and I'm 'SPEAK ENGLISH MAN!!...squirrel...whatever!' so he's like 'We're going on vacation. Shire! Here we come!!' and then they all ran off. As if this wasn't enough, I lost my favorite shoe in the Field of Celebrant! I loved that shoe...AND I dropped my CD player!!! I was listening to Queen...and now I've got Bohemian Rhapsody stuck in my head and there's no way to get it out!!!"

"Oh yes there is!!" Ereon threw a microphone at D'elph, who was half asleep from Mellaquiimm's story.

"Huh?" he asked sleepily.

"We're singing Bohemian Rhapsody!! And you're leadin'!" yelled Ereon. The lights fade out, and everyone goes and stands on a stage that just magically appeared there. In darkness...

"Is this the real life? Is this just fantasy? Caught in a land slide. No escape from reality. Open your eyes. Look up to the skies and see. I'm just a poor boy, I need no sympathy. Because I'm easy come, easy go, little high, little low. Anyway the wind blows doesn't really matter to me."

 A spot light shines on D'elph as he begins singing solo... "To me..."

"Mama...just killed a man...." he goes on singing, with everyone backing him up.