"I don't see why we have to be here," Spike said as he kicked his feet up
onto the table in the Magic Box.
"Something about working for the White Hats, man," Pike said. "Don't always just get to go off half-cocked."
"We used to," Spike said. "Before bloody Sunnydale, we did what we wanted for three months. A short time here and you're the Slayer's bloody lapdog. Makes me sick."
Pike rolled his eyes. "Not lapdog," he said. "Friend. Besides, before we were pretty much grey hats. Or maybe off white. Anyway, we got called up to the show, so we adapt. And anyway, it was your idea to come back."
"Friend," Spike snorted. "What is it with you people and friends. You haven't seen the bint in almost four years. You're not a friend, you're a bloody memory."
"I do wish the both of you would stop this pointless bickering," Giles said from behind the counter. "The others will be here in a few minutes."
"Sorry, man," Pike said. "It's just the way we do things."
"Oh, don't apologize to him," Spike said. "Watcher man just needs to get a little sack action. That would loosen him right up. Let loose a little, Mr. Tweed. Stop being so damned stuffy."
"Giving me advice on life, Spike?" Giles said. "I didn't know you cared."
"I don't," Spike said. "But the less stuffy you are, the easier my life is. I'm motivated by purely selfish emotions and my. . . baser desires."
"Yes," Giles said. "I can see with the way you get a migraine anytime you try to injure somebody that you're quite the scary evil man."
"Just wait until I get this chip out," Spike said.
"What, so Buffy can defeat you yet again?"
"Spike, shut up," Pike said. "No need to egg him on. Besides, Giles here seems cooler than Merrick was."
Giles looked up from his book. "You knew Merrick?" he asked.
Pike nodded. "Yeah. He was Buffy's first watcher. Cool guy, but stuffier than you are. How'd you know him?"
"I didn't," Giles said. "Not by more than reputation, anyway. I, along with many other Watchers, was saddened to hear of his passing, not the least reason being that it was said he was the only one who could keep Travers in line."
"Who's Travers?" Spike asked as the bell rang.
"He's a shit head," Faith said from the front of the store. "Man, I'd like to get my hands on that guy."
"I think we all would," Willow said, entering behind Faith.
"No Riley or um. . .?" Giles trailed off.
"Tara," Willow supplied.
"Yes, right, Tara. Sorry."
"Walsh has Riley on rest tonight, not letting him go out. He's under orders," Faith said.
"A-and Tara wasn't really. . . well, she thought she would be in the way."
Faith snorted. "If she can do that cool shield thing like she did for B when the Fangless Wonder here attacked, she's welcome on my team anytime."
Pike was chuckling softly.
"Just what are you laughing at, mate?" Spike asked.
"Dude. Fangless Wonder. I'll have to remember that," Pike said, smirking.
"Why are we talking about Travers?" Faith asked. "That bastard isn't back in town is he?"
"No," Giles said. "Thankfully. I was just telling Pike here how Merrick, Buffy's first watcher, was supposedly able to keep Travers in line."
"Someone could do that?" Willow asked. "Where is he now?"
"Dead," Pike said. "Died trying to save Buffy from Lothos."
"Lothos?" Spike asked. "She fought that wanker?"
"He was the head honcho in LA until Buff took him down," Pike said. "Rough fight. That's when she burned down the gym."
Spike snorted. "Lothos was nothing but a two-bit rip-off of Dracula, who was a masterful ponce in his own right. Has to have his special dirt, doesn't he? All gypsy magic and parlor tricks. Wanker owes me eleven quid."
"Guess you're not getting that back," Pike said.
"What? Why not?" Spike asked.
"Did you not just hear him say Lothos was dead, Spike?" Giles asked.
"Not Lothos, you idiots. Dracula," Spike said.
"Dracula?" Willow asked.
"Yeah. You know, fangy guy, has some movies and a book or two? Dracula."
"You mean Dracula's real?" Giles asked.
"Well, yeah," Spike said, matter-of-factly. "Bram Stoker didn't have a creative bone in his body. That Van Helsing sod was a right tough bugger, I'll tell you."
Everyone was silent.
"What's the big deal?" Spike asked.
"I had always just assumed Dracula was fictional," Giles said, as the others nodded.
"Yeah, well, he's not. The only fiction is that he's more powerful than the rest of us. Just knows a few tricks that's all."
"Is that jealousy, Spike?" Faith asked.
"No," Spike said, too insistently.
"I think it is. You're jealous of him!" Willow said.
"Well, why should he get all the press?" Spike asked. "He didn't do anything so special."
"No," Pike said. "He just had the smarts to tell someone his story."
"Yeah."
"And you didn't," Faith said.
"Ye-oh, sod off, the lot of you."
* * * * *
"There's not a bloody thing out here," Spike said. "Nothing to fight, nothing to kill, and most importantly, nothing to eat."
"You couldn't eat it anyway," Pike said.
"I could if it was already dead. You could kill it for me."
"We've been over this," Pike said. "I don't kill people who aren't evil. Or who don't really piss me off."
"What about that guy in San Francisco? He pissed you right the hell off. He called your parentage into question."
"Spike, I call my parentage into question, why shouldn't he? I mean, have you seen my mom?"
"No," Spike said. "Of course I haven't. I mean, it's not like you introduce me to your friends, now, is it?"
Pike stopped walking and sighed. "Man, why do you always have to go all woman on me? I keep you around, I find you fights, I buy you blood. And besides, I introduced you to Buffy."
Spike snorted. "I've already met the Slayer, and her band of merry poofs."
"Well, I don't really know anybody else. Demon hunters aren't a notoriously social group. Unless you want to meet Benny, who's an even more pathetic vampire than you are."
"I'm not pathetic," Spike said.
"You can't feed, you can't hurt anybody, you have no minions, and you rely on a human for your blood, which is pig's blood. How is that not pathetic?" Pike asked.
"Sounds pretty pathetic to me," a voice said from the shadows.
Six men in army fatigues, all carrying pulse rifles, stepped out from the trees.
"Hey, uh, Riley, right?" Pike said. "Yeah, hey. We were just talking. How's the leg?"
"It's good. Recovering well from the vampire attack," Riley said, looking at Pike pointedly. Pike got the message.
"Captain, I've got no heat signature from the blonde one," one of the soldiers said.
"I know," Riley said. "He's harmless. Chipped."
"I thought you were on bed rest," Pike said.
"I got better," said Riley. "Why are you two out?"
"Blond bitch and her whelp fancied the night off, so Watcher-With-A-Stick- Up-His-Bum called on our services," Spike said.
Riley nodded, then slammed the butt of his rifle into Spike's stomach. "Don't insult my friends," he said.
"That's really not needed," Pike said. "We're on the same side here."
"You, maybe," Riley said. "He's just waiting for a better deal to come along."
"Just because you don't like him doesn't mean he can't help out," Pike said.
Riley opened his mouth to reply, when a scream was heard from across the cemetery, and all seven men and one vampire took off towards the scream. Spike outpaced all the men, with Pike and Riley next, but falling quickly behind.
"You're fast," Pike said to Riley as they ran.
"I train with Slayers," Riley said.
They came around a tree and saw seven vampires circling two young women.
"Guess your boy bugged out," Riley said, not seeing Spike.
"Not a chance," Pike said. He pulled out his pistol and fired two shots, kneecapping the one who looked like the leader as Riley shot the same vampire with his pulse rifle. As soon as the attention was turned to Pike and Riley, Spike jumped down from the tree and landed on top of the one closest to the girls, pounding him into the ground. He whipped two small tree branches out and dusted the two vampires closest to him, then flung one into the back of the vampire beneath his feet.
Spike then rolled out, took the legs out from under the next vampire and held the branch below him as he fell, dusting. By this time, the soldiers showed up and shot the last two vampires with their pulse rifles. A couple of soldiers walked over and staked the vampires on the ground.
Riley looked incredulously at Spike, who was walking back to them and smoking a cigarette. "That was just what I needed," he said, throwing his arm around Pike. "Come on, mate. Let's go toss back a few."
As Spike and Pike walked off, Spike turned and yelled, "Have fun cleaning up, ladies." He then turned to Pike and muttered, "Pathetic my arse."
* * * * *
The bell over the door to the Magic Box jingled.
"Oh, bloody hell," Giles said, pulling out his first aid kit. "Not you, too."
"Not us too what?" Pike asked as Spike helped him limp over to a chair.
"Did you encounter Adam?" Giles asked.
"Don't think so," Spike said. "None of these blokes looked like an Adam."
"What were they?" Giles asked.
"Demons," Spike said. "Big. Claws and fangs, all 'grrr' like. Yellow, too."
"Interesting," Giles said, as he applied some anti-septic to one of Pike's cuts. "I'll have to check my books."
The door jingled again and Faith walked in.
"Man, I heard you two got the shit kicked out of you at Willy's," she said. Giles leveled a glare at Spike, who shrugged.
"Hey, my description was completely accurate," he said.
Faith sauntered over to the table and hopped up on it. "Vampire and badass demon hunter gettin' smashed up over a couple rounds. That's just pathetic, man."
Spike shook his head and pulled out a pack of cigarettes. "Why does everyone keep saying that?"
The door jingled again and Buffy and Xander walked in. Everybody gaped at Xander.
"Hey guys," he said. "Wow, you two look like hell. Rough night?"
Pike nodded slowly, his brain not yet having caught up with his eyes. Spike sat there with an unlit cigarette hanging limply out of his mouth.
"You think it's bad for you," Buffy said. "I had to deal with this all day."
"Oh come on," Xander said. "It's not that bad."
"Xander," Faith said, "that shirt should be outlawed."
"Yes," said Giles. "It's giving me a headache."
"Well, I like it," Xander said.
Xander stood there dressed in khaki pants and a shirt that could only be described as unholy. It was a mix of yellow, green, red and blue stripes, some vertical, some horizontal, all ugly, combined with white animal shapes. The shirt, much to everybody's dismay and confusion, managed to clash with itself.
"Take it off," Faith said seriously, not able to rip her eyes away from the grisly scene before her. "Take it off, I have to slay it."
"No," Xander said, inching away from Faith. "It's comfortable."
Buffy rolled her eyes, took Xander's hand and led him to a chair. "Comfort is no reason to violate the Geneva Convention, sweetie," she said. "It's like a Leroy Neiman painting exploded on you."
Pike shook his head to clear it. "So where did you guys go?" he asked.
"Santa Monica," Xander said, grinning. "Buffy took me out to the beach, then to the pier, where she won me a biiiiig teddy bear that's currently taking up the back seat of my car." Xander grinned and kissed his girlfriend on the forehead.
"Yeah, and after I won it, I got to carry it around all day, too," Buffy pouted.
Xander grinned. "It was funny," he said. "The bear is almost as big as she is."
Buffy swatted his arm. "It is not! It's only like four feet tall."
"Only, she says. I could barely see her behind it. It was so cute."
"Didn't people look at you weird, you bein' about a foot taller than her, and her carryin' it about instead of you?" Spike asked.
"Yup!" Xander said. "But I'm used to weird looks. Ahh, the life of a Scooby."
"So you had a restful day, then?" Giles asked.
"Oh yeah," Xander said. "I'm all rested and healed up and everything."
"I had a nice one, too," Buffy said, smiling.
"You just got your ego stroked when those punk kids hit on you," Xander said, almost snarling.
"Aww, did my Xandy-bear get jealous?" Buffy asked.
People started rolling their eyes.
"Nah," Xander said confidently, flexing his muscles. "They got nothin' on the Xand-man."
"I don't know," Buffy said, teasingly. "That middle one was kinda cute. . ."
"Oh, no you don't," Xander said. He immediately started tickling her Buffy, causing her to wiggle and squeal.
"Well!" Giles said forcefully, stopping what seemed to be foreplay before it ran amok. "If there are no actual emergencies, I should like to close up shop and forget everything that I have just seen and heard."
* * * * *
"You know, Xander, you really don't have to do this," Joyce said.
"I enjoy it," Xander said. "It's my line of work, it's something I'm good at."
"Other than killing demons," Joyce said.
"Well, yeah, but I can't exactly put that on my resume. Carpentry, that's a marketable skill. Stand back for a second."
Joyce backed up as Xander lowered his goggles and cut some wood with his power saw.
"This is good wood," Xander said when he shut the saw off. "It'll make a sturdy bookcase."
"Well, I've needed one. You wouldn't believe how much Faith reads."
Xander raised an eyebrow. "Really?" he asked. "I'd never have guessed."
"She goes through books very quickly," Joyce said.
"Well, this guy here should do the trick," Xander said, patting the wood. "In a few hours, you'll have a bookshelf, ready to be stained."
"Primed and painted, actually," Joyce said. Xander winced. "You don't like painted wood?"
"It's not that I don't like it," Xander said. "In fact, in some cases, I would consider myself a fan. But sometimes I just like the natural look to come through, and this has a beautiful natural grain. Your decision though."
"Well, I think I tend to agree with you," Joyce said. "But we already moved a bookshelf out of Dawn's room for Faith, so this one is going back in there."
Xander nodded. "Say no more. I understand the supreme messiness of a fourteen year old."
"Xander, you understand the supreme messiness of anybody," Joyce said. "Would you like some water?"
"That'd be great," he said. Joyce went inside then returned a moment later with a glass of ice water.
"I'm just going to go do some bookkeeping," Joyce said. "I'll be inside if you need something."
Xander nodded, and went back to work. The sun beat down on him, and he eventually dropped down to just his undershirt. Going back to make some more cuts on the wood, Xander failed to hear the approaching middle school girls.
"Hey Xander," Dawn said, startling him as he made some measurements and causing him to turn around.
"Oh, hey, Dawnie," he said, smiling at her. And her friends. "Who's this?" he asked.
"Oh, Alison, Lisa, Jen, this is Xander. Xander, Alison, Lisa and Jen," Dawn said. In an astound burst of courage, she bounced up to Xander and gave him a kiss on the cheek. Xander was a little surprised, but quickly recovered.
"Hey girls," Xander said, wiping the sweat off his brow. "Nice to meet you."
The girls just giggled, as Dawn blushed. Dawn waved a quick goodbye to them, and they giggled again as they walked away.
"What was that all about?" Xander asked as Dawn passed him to go inside.
"Oh," Dawn said, holding her books to her chest. "Um. . . they're just. . . really giggly."
Xander chuckled. "They reminded me of the Cordettes. How scary is that?"
"Umm. . . yeah," Dawn said. "Scary. Is that my new bookcase?"
"Yup," Xander said.
"Cool," Dawn said. "See ya, Xander."
Xander mussed her hair and went back to work.
----------
End Chapter 11
"Something about working for the White Hats, man," Pike said. "Don't always just get to go off half-cocked."
"We used to," Spike said. "Before bloody Sunnydale, we did what we wanted for three months. A short time here and you're the Slayer's bloody lapdog. Makes me sick."
Pike rolled his eyes. "Not lapdog," he said. "Friend. Besides, before we were pretty much grey hats. Or maybe off white. Anyway, we got called up to the show, so we adapt. And anyway, it was your idea to come back."
"Friend," Spike snorted. "What is it with you people and friends. You haven't seen the bint in almost four years. You're not a friend, you're a bloody memory."
"I do wish the both of you would stop this pointless bickering," Giles said from behind the counter. "The others will be here in a few minutes."
"Sorry, man," Pike said. "It's just the way we do things."
"Oh, don't apologize to him," Spike said. "Watcher man just needs to get a little sack action. That would loosen him right up. Let loose a little, Mr. Tweed. Stop being so damned stuffy."
"Giving me advice on life, Spike?" Giles said. "I didn't know you cared."
"I don't," Spike said. "But the less stuffy you are, the easier my life is. I'm motivated by purely selfish emotions and my. . . baser desires."
"Yes," Giles said. "I can see with the way you get a migraine anytime you try to injure somebody that you're quite the scary evil man."
"Just wait until I get this chip out," Spike said.
"What, so Buffy can defeat you yet again?"
"Spike, shut up," Pike said. "No need to egg him on. Besides, Giles here seems cooler than Merrick was."
Giles looked up from his book. "You knew Merrick?" he asked.
Pike nodded. "Yeah. He was Buffy's first watcher. Cool guy, but stuffier than you are. How'd you know him?"
"I didn't," Giles said. "Not by more than reputation, anyway. I, along with many other Watchers, was saddened to hear of his passing, not the least reason being that it was said he was the only one who could keep Travers in line."
"Who's Travers?" Spike asked as the bell rang.
"He's a shit head," Faith said from the front of the store. "Man, I'd like to get my hands on that guy."
"I think we all would," Willow said, entering behind Faith.
"No Riley or um. . .?" Giles trailed off.
"Tara," Willow supplied.
"Yes, right, Tara. Sorry."
"Walsh has Riley on rest tonight, not letting him go out. He's under orders," Faith said.
"A-and Tara wasn't really. . . well, she thought she would be in the way."
Faith snorted. "If she can do that cool shield thing like she did for B when the Fangless Wonder here attacked, she's welcome on my team anytime."
Pike was chuckling softly.
"Just what are you laughing at, mate?" Spike asked.
"Dude. Fangless Wonder. I'll have to remember that," Pike said, smirking.
"Why are we talking about Travers?" Faith asked. "That bastard isn't back in town is he?"
"No," Giles said. "Thankfully. I was just telling Pike here how Merrick, Buffy's first watcher, was supposedly able to keep Travers in line."
"Someone could do that?" Willow asked. "Where is he now?"
"Dead," Pike said. "Died trying to save Buffy from Lothos."
"Lothos?" Spike asked. "She fought that wanker?"
"He was the head honcho in LA until Buff took him down," Pike said. "Rough fight. That's when she burned down the gym."
Spike snorted. "Lothos was nothing but a two-bit rip-off of Dracula, who was a masterful ponce in his own right. Has to have his special dirt, doesn't he? All gypsy magic and parlor tricks. Wanker owes me eleven quid."
"Guess you're not getting that back," Pike said.
"What? Why not?" Spike asked.
"Did you not just hear him say Lothos was dead, Spike?" Giles asked.
"Not Lothos, you idiots. Dracula," Spike said.
"Dracula?" Willow asked.
"Yeah. You know, fangy guy, has some movies and a book or two? Dracula."
"You mean Dracula's real?" Giles asked.
"Well, yeah," Spike said, matter-of-factly. "Bram Stoker didn't have a creative bone in his body. That Van Helsing sod was a right tough bugger, I'll tell you."
Everyone was silent.
"What's the big deal?" Spike asked.
"I had always just assumed Dracula was fictional," Giles said, as the others nodded.
"Yeah, well, he's not. The only fiction is that he's more powerful than the rest of us. Just knows a few tricks that's all."
"Is that jealousy, Spike?" Faith asked.
"No," Spike said, too insistently.
"I think it is. You're jealous of him!" Willow said.
"Well, why should he get all the press?" Spike asked. "He didn't do anything so special."
"No," Pike said. "He just had the smarts to tell someone his story."
"Yeah."
"And you didn't," Faith said.
"Ye-oh, sod off, the lot of you."
* * * * *
"There's not a bloody thing out here," Spike said. "Nothing to fight, nothing to kill, and most importantly, nothing to eat."
"You couldn't eat it anyway," Pike said.
"I could if it was already dead. You could kill it for me."
"We've been over this," Pike said. "I don't kill people who aren't evil. Or who don't really piss me off."
"What about that guy in San Francisco? He pissed you right the hell off. He called your parentage into question."
"Spike, I call my parentage into question, why shouldn't he? I mean, have you seen my mom?"
"No," Spike said. "Of course I haven't. I mean, it's not like you introduce me to your friends, now, is it?"
Pike stopped walking and sighed. "Man, why do you always have to go all woman on me? I keep you around, I find you fights, I buy you blood. And besides, I introduced you to Buffy."
Spike snorted. "I've already met the Slayer, and her band of merry poofs."
"Well, I don't really know anybody else. Demon hunters aren't a notoriously social group. Unless you want to meet Benny, who's an even more pathetic vampire than you are."
"I'm not pathetic," Spike said.
"You can't feed, you can't hurt anybody, you have no minions, and you rely on a human for your blood, which is pig's blood. How is that not pathetic?" Pike asked.
"Sounds pretty pathetic to me," a voice said from the shadows.
Six men in army fatigues, all carrying pulse rifles, stepped out from the trees.
"Hey, uh, Riley, right?" Pike said. "Yeah, hey. We were just talking. How's the leg?"
"It's good. Recovering well from the vampire attack," Riley said, looking at Pike pointedly. Pike got the message.
"Captain, I've got no heat signature from the blonde one," one of the soldiers said.
"I know," Riley said. "He's harmless. Chipped."
"I thought you were on bed rest," Pike said.
"I got better," said Riley. "Why are you two out?"
"Blond bitch and her whelp fancied the night off, so Watcher-With-A-Stick- Up-His-Bum called on our services," Spike said.
Riley nodded, then slammed the butt of his rifle into Spike's stomach. "Don't insult my friends," he said.
"That's really not needed," Pike said. "We're on the same side here."
"You, maybe," Riley said. "He's just waiting for a better deal to come along."
"Just because you don't like him doesn't mean he can't help out," Pike said.
Riley opened his mouth to reply, when a scream was heard from across the cemetery, and all seven men and one vampire took off towards the scream. Spike outpaced all the men, with Pike and Riley next, but falling quickly behind.
"You're fast," Pike said to Riley as they ran.
"I train with Slayers," Riley said.
They came around a tree and saw seven vampires circling two young women.
"Guess your boy bugged out," Riley said, not seeing Spike.
"Not a chance," Pike said. He pulled out his pistol and fired two shots, kneecapping the one who looked like the leader as Riley shot the same vampire with his pulse rifle. As soon as the attention was turned to Pike and Riley, Spike jumped down from the tree and landed on top of the one closest to the girls, pounding him into the ground. He whipped two small tree branches out and dusted the two vampires closest to him, then flung one into the back of the vampire beneath his feet.
Spike then rolled out, took the legs out from under the next vampire and held the branch below him as he fell, dusting. By this time, the soldiers showed up and shot the last two vampires with their pulse rifles. A couple of soldiers walked over and staked the vampires on the ground.
Riley looked incredulously at Spike, who was walking back to them and smoking a cigarette. "That was just what I needed," he said, throwing his arm around Pike. "Come on, mate. Let's go toss back a few."
As Spike and Pike walked off, Spike turned and yelled, "Have fun cleaning up, ladies." He then turned to Pike and muttered, "Pathetic my arse."
* * * * *
The bell over the door to the Magic Box jingled.
"Oh, bloody hell," Giles said, pulling out his first aid kit. "Not you, too."
"Not us too what?" Pike asked as Spike helped him limp over to a chair.
"Did you encounter Adam?" Giles asked.
"Don't think so," Spike said. "None of these blokes looked like an Adam."
"What were they?" Giles asked.
"Demons," Spike said. "Big. Claws and fangs, all 'grrr' like. Yellow, too."
"Interesting," Giles said, as he applied some anti-septic to one of Pike's cuts. "I'll have to check my books."
The door jingled again and Faith walked in.
"Man, I heard you two got the shit kicked out of you at Willy's," she said. Giles leveled a glare at Spike, who shrugged.
"Hey, my description was completely accurate," he said.
Faith sauntered over to the table and hopped up on it. "Vampire and badass demon hunter gettin' smashed up over a couple rounds. That's just pathetic, man."
Spike shook his head and pulled out a pack of cigarettes. "Why does everyone keep saying that?"
The door jingled again and Buffy and Xander walked in. Everybody gaped at Xander.
"Hey guys," he said. "Wow, you two look like hell. Rough night?"
Pike nodded slowly, his brain not yet having caught up with his eyes. Spike sat there with an unlit cigarette hanging limply out of his mouth.
"You think it's bad for you," Buffy said. "I had to deal with this all day."
"Oh come on," Xander said. "It's not that bad."
"Xander," Faith said, "that shirt should be outlawed."
"Yes," said Giles. "It's giving me a headache."
"Well, I like it," Xander said.
Xander stood there dressed in khaki pants and a shirt that could only be described as unholy. It was a mix of yellow, green, red and blue stripes, some vertical, some horizontal, all ugly, combined with white animal shapes. The shirt, much to everybody's dismay and confusion, managed to clash with itself.
"Take it off," Faith said seriously, not able to rip her eyes away from the grisly scene before her. "Take it off, I have to slay it."
"No," Xander said, inching away from Faith. "It's comfortable."
Buffy rolled her eyes, took Xander's hand and led him to a chair. "Comfort is no reason to violate the Geneva Convention, sweetie," she said. "It's like a Leroy Neiman painting exploded on you."
Pike shook his head to clear it. "So where did you guys go?" he asked.
"Santa Monica," Xander said, grinning. "Buffy took me out to the beach, then to the pier, where she won me a biiiiig teddy bear that's currently taking up the back seat of my car." Xander grinned and kissed his girlfriend on the forehead.
"Yeah, and after I won it, I got to carry it around all day, too," Buffy pouted.
Xander grinned. "It was funny," he said. "The bear is almost as big as she is."
Buffy swatted his arm. "It is not! It's only like four feet tall."
"Only, she says. I could barely see her behind it. It was so cute."
"Didn't people look at you weird, you bein' about a foot taller than her, and her carryin' it about instead of you?" Spike asked.
"Yup!" Xander said. "But I'm used to weird looks. Ahh, the life of a Scooby."
"So you had a restful day, then?" Giles asked.
"Oh yeah," Xander said. "I'm all rested and healed up and everything."
"I had a nice one, too," Buffy said, smiling.
"You just got your ego stroked when those punk kids hit on you," Xander said, almost snarling.
"Aww, did my Xandy-bear get jealous?" Buffy asked.
People started rolling their eyes.
"Nah," Xander said confidently, flexing his muscles. "They got nothin' on the Xand-man."
"I don't know," Buffy said, teasingly. "That middle one was kinda cute. . ."
"Oh, no you don't," Xander said. He immediately started tickling her Buffy, causing her to wiggle and squeal.
"Well!" Giles said forcefully, stopping what seemed to be foreplay before it ran amok. "If there are no actual emergencies, I should like to close up shop and forget everything that I have just seen and heard."
* * * * *
"You know, Xander, you really don't have to do this," Joyce said.
"I enjoy it," Xander said. "It's my line of work, it's something I'm good at."
"Other than killing demons," Joyce said.
"Well, yeah, but I can't exactly put that on my resume. Carpentry, that's a marketable skill. Stand back for a second."
Joyce backed up as Xander lowered his goggles and cut some wood with his power saw.
"This is good wood," Xander said when he shut the saw off. "It'll make a sturdy bookcase."
"Well, I've needed one. You wouldn't believe how much Faith reads."
Xander raised an eyebrow. "Really?" he asked. "I'd never have guessed."
"She goes through books very quickly," Joyce said.
"Well, this guy here should do the trick," Xander said, patting the wood. "In a few hours, you'll have a bookshelf, ready to be stained."
"Primed and painted, actually," Joyce said. Xander winced. "You don't like painted wood?"
"It's not that I don't like it," Xander said. "In fact, in some cases, I would consider myself a fan. But sometimes I just like the natural look to come through, and this has a beautiful natural grain. Your decision though."
"Well, I think I tend to agree with you," Joyce said. "But we already moved a bookshelf out of Dawn's room for Faith, so this one is going back in there."
Xander nodded. "Say no more. I understand the supreme messiness of a fourteen year old."
"Xander, you understand the supreme messiness of anybody," Joyce said. "Would you like some water?"
"That'd be great," he said. Joyce went inside then returned a moment later with a glass of ice water.
"I'm just going to go do some bookkeeping," Joyce said. "I'll be inside if you need something."
Xander nodded, and went back to work. The sun beat down on him, and he eventually dropped down to just his undershirt. Going back to make some more cuts on the wood, Xander failed to hear the approaching middle school girls.
"Hey Xander," Dawn said, startling him as he made some measurements and causing him to turn around.
"Oh, hey, Dawnie," he said, smiling at her. And her friends. "Who's this?" he asked.
"Oh, Alison, Lisa, Jen, this is Xander. Xander, Alison, Lisa and Jen," Dawn said. In an astound burst of courage, she bounced up to Xander and gave him a kiss on the cheek. Xander was a little surprised, but quickly recovered.
"Hey girls," Xander said, wiping the sweat off his brow. "Nice to meet you."
The girls just giggled, as Dawn blushed. Dawn waved a quick goodbye to them, and they giggled again as they walked away.
"What was that all about?" Xander asked as Dawn passed him to go inside.
"Oh," Dawn said, holding her books to her chest. "Um. . . they're just. . . really giggly."
Xander chuckled. "They reminded me of the Cordettes. How scary is that?"
"Umm. . . yeah," Dawn said. "Scary. Is that my new bookcase?"
"Yup," Xander said.
"Cool," Dawn said. "See ya, Xander."
Xander mussed her hair and went back to work.
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End Chapter 11
