True Love Is Sacrifice
I sit in my car and drive aimlessly around the city. Its been three days since I discovered that I had been missing for two years and that the love of my life was married. I haven't spoken to Vaughn since because I have no clue what to say or how to act around him. I still love him. I still love him with every fibre of my being. I never even got a chance to tell him how much I love him.
I suddenly realize that my flow of thoughts had caused an endless stream of tears to flow down my cheeks. I quickly grabbed a tissue and pulled the car over to glance around and recover my bearings. To my surprise, I had ended up at the pier and this invoked a chuckle through my sobs. Even after two years, I still somehow, automatically ended at this place. I get out of my car and start walking towards the pier. The world around me had changed so much in the past two years and everyone had moved on. I feel as if I don't belong, as if I have no place anywhere or with anyone. Vaughn always used to be around for me to turn to and suddenly he's not here anymore, leaving me lost and alone.
I reach the railing, the exact place where Vaughn and I stood a long time ago, and remember the first time I touched Vaughn's hand.( This was of course, after I had, very intelligently, thrown my beeper into the pacific) When I touched him, it was like every cell in my hand started to heat up and cause sensations throughout my body. And it happens every single time we touch. How am I supposed to go on from here? How am I going to look into those intense green eyes of his and not feel like crying? How am I going to look at his beautiful face everyday and not feel like touching and kissing him? How am I going to live each day knowing that he belongs to someone else when, my heart and soul still belong to him?
No word can describe the pain I'm feeling at this moment. I don't even think that there's a word for such hurt in the English language. My convulsive sobs seem to be drawing too much attention from passers-by and I try to turn away by looking below at the thrashing waves. Suicide doesn't even seem like a bad idea at this point. I mean there's nothing left for me and no one would have to grieve over my death because they have all already dealt with the passing of Sydney Bristow and moved on quite well in fact. No..no….not yet Not until I find the bastard who did this to me and kill him.
Rain drops start peltering down on me but I stand my ground despite the blistering cold and impending storm. My mind drifts back to Vaughn. It's the only place it seems to go. Oh Vaughn….why did you give up on me? Did you ever even love me? Why did you move on and stop looking for me so quickly? Do you even love your wife? What am I saying? Of course you love your wife; you wouldn't have married her otherwise. If things were the other way around, I would have spent a life time looking for you. You were the love of my life…moving on would never have been an option.
Now drenched beyond recognition, I begin the slow war back to my car. I suddenly feel a presence in the distance and my curious eyes shift to the left. I see you…Vaughn. You seem to be frantically searching for someone. "But I don't want to be found" I think to myself. Just then your, sparkling green eyes meet my tearing hazel ones and at that instant, time seems to stand still and the world around us seems o disappear leaving just you and me. Your mesmerizing presence has such power over me and it takes every ounce of self restraint I have to stop myself from running into your arms. I pull away from your piercing gaze and break into a run. My sobs are now beyond control and I sprint towards my car. "Sydney!" I hear you call out to me, as I reach the sanctuary of my car. I cast one final glance in your direction and see your eyes filled with so much pain. I turn away and slam my foot on the accelerator, speeding off. This is the way it has to be. I love him so much; more than I love anything else in this world. That is why I have to do this. I love him enough to let him go. As painful as it is, true love is sacrifice.
P.S- Thank you to everyone who reviewed my first fic, down to you. I would love to hear more from you guys. Should I do another chapter? Another one in Vaughn's POV?
