A/N: Where are my reviews! Come on people I know you're reading my story.
Review it damn it. Plus I changed the rating to PG-13 for reasons you will
see later. Enjoy the chapter!
"Sir?" Jojo timidly asked standing at the doorway to his master's domain. "Can I come in? I have a present for you?"
"Go away!" Sauron yelled, he was obviously pouting. "I don't want to talk to anyone right now! Just leave me be."
Jojo just smiled as he brought in Sauron's present to make him feel better. It was another female flaming eye. "Here you go master! Your present, we built it with the spare parts we had laying around the place."
Sauron just looked at it, and turned his head to the sky mumbling. "God I can't wait to eat that orc next month at my coming out party. They taste like chicken."
"What was that sir?" Jojo asked.
"Nothing." Sauron replied. "Nothing at all, I just said that I'm really proud of you guys for being able to build this giant thing without my help. It proves your loyalty to me. Now go Jojo I have things to plot." Jojo walked out of the room and Sauron stared at the fiery eye that his disgusting friend had brought him. For a moment he actually felt as if he may not be alone after all. But he snapped out of it quickly realizing that it was just a stupid magic trick that Saraman had performed to cheer his master. The orc must have taken credit for it. "Do you talk he asked his new colleague?" He asked.
It replied. "Of course I do silly. Do you think Saraman would have left out the most important part of my job?"
"What is your job?" He asked it.
"To make you feel like a man." It replied in a strange voice.
Sauron knew that it was coming on to him so he quickly tried to change the subject. "So ah, how bout them Vikings?" He croaked out nervously, but the girl just kept staring at him. He could not resist her beauty he had to have her.. And this is the part where I probably cut out as it 'gets a little blue' from here.
*******************************************
"I'll show you mine if you show me yours." Legolas whispered to Aragorn in the bushes. He nodded, and you could hear a couple of pairs of pants unzip. "Wow." Legolas commented. "It's so small!"
"Speak for yourself Leggy Boy!" Aragorn snapped back.
Gimli was confused about what was going on back there so he decided to investigate. He slowly crept toward the bushes; he could hear their voices whispering back and forth about their things. He was almost to the bushes when he let go of a huge and very smelly fart. "Damn it! I ripped my pants again!"
"Can't breath!" Legolas choked out, Aragorn just nodded as he was too dizzy to speak.
"What the hell are you too doing back their?" Gimli asked. "It would seem that you two were comparing your Teletubbie undies."
"So what if we are?" Aragorn stated with an attitude.
"Well than you two are obviously having an affair. Aragorn what would Arwen think of all this?" Gimli asked.
"We're not having an affair Gimli, God we were just comparing the size of the Teletubbie characters on our tighty whities. That's all!" But before Aragorn could finish explaining it all to Gimli they heard the screams, and went racing off to save the day.
*******************************************
"Guys, I'm am totally freaked out right now!" Don exclaimed.
"Totally!" Added Mike.
The turtles prepared to charge the unknown person when Z-man spoke out to them. "Stop I am Z-man, I was sent here to escort you to Rohan. Follow me."
The turtles were really confused at this point, but they were lost anyway so they decided to follow him. "What about our car?" Leo asked.
"My forest will watch over it until you return." Replied Z-man the magnificently good looking.
So they went on their way back to the camp until they ran into the other three. "What the hell? Hat's going on, I'm really getting confused." Commented Legolas.
"All will be explained tonight, now come there is much to do." Z-man quickly said and hurried on.
So they all headed back to the camp that Gimli set up, as the other two were busy "comparing" their stuff. Z-man explained how the note they read was not from Splinter, but from Gandalf. Everyone was confused about how the Turtles got to Middle Earth. So Z-man carefully and slowly told them that when the Turtles reached the address that was given to them, Gandalf opened a portal that sucked them into Middle Earth. "Gandalf informed me of this so that I could rendezvous with them and take them to Rohan, and that is how I know so much." Z-man continued. "And that is why we must reach Rohan no later than tomorrow afternoon, so we must leave at dawn."
"Well I think we need a little story to lighten the mood, I nominate myself." Gimli recommended.
"Oh God no!" Screamed Aragorn. "We have exactly five minutes to retreat five hundred yards from the area before he starts his cake story! Run!" Everyone took off but Gimli, who stayed to tell his cake story to himself.
***********************************************
It was dawn and the Fellow ship had awoken. The Turtles were discussing Gimli's magnetic personality; there was something that they liked about him that they couldn't quite put their finger on. Aragorn was cooking breakfast, Legolas was bathing; wanting to try out his new shampoo he got in the mail yesterday, Z-man was preparing for the long hike to Rohan, and of course, Gimli was pestering Aragorn, wanting to know when the food would be done. "Breakfast is ready!" Aragorn announced.
Gimli gasped and came running to grab a plate and dig in. He would've taken the whole thing for himself if Aragorn didn't hit him on the head with a spoon telling him to move along. "I'm not eating off of that spoon anymore." Commented Legolas, who was clearly disgusted with the spoon, and Gimli.
"What are you talking about, the spoon is fine. See, I'll eat with it." Aragorn took one spoonful of gruel and his face turned green. He quickly ran to the shrubs and vomited it up. Legolas just smirked, knowing he was right again, as always.
As soon as everyone was done eating and Gimli was done bathing, (The Fellowship insisted on it.) Z-man announced that they must move out. So they set out for Rohan, not knowing what types of danger they might encounter on the way there.
A/N: So what do you think? Tell me, I accept anonymous reviews too, so you have no excuses not to review it. Please tell me what you think!
"Sir?" Jojo timidly asked standing at the doorway to his master's domain. "Can I come in? I have a present for you?"
"Go away!" Sauron yelled, he was obviously pouting. "I don't want to talk to anyone right now! Just leave me be."
Jojo just smiled as he brought in Sauron's present to make him feel better. It was another female flaming eye. "Here you go master! Your present, we built it with the spare parts we had laying around the place."
Sauron just looked at it, and turned his head to the sky mumbling. "God I can't wait to eat that orc next month at my coming out party. They taste like chicken."
"What was that sir?" Jojo asked.
"Nothing." Sauron replied. "Nothing at all, I just said that I'm really proud of you guys for being able to build this giant thing without my help. It proves your loyalty to me. Now go Jojo I have things to plot." Jojo walked out of the room and Sauron stared at the fiery eye that his disgusting friend had brought him. For a moment he actually felt as if he may not be alone after all. But he snapped out of it quickly realizing that it was just a stupid magic trick that Saraman had performed to cheer his master. The orc must have taken credit for it. "Do you talk he asked his new colleague?" He asked.
It replied. "Of course I do silly. Do you think Saraman would have left out the most important part of my job?"
"What is your job?" He asked it.
"To make you feel like a man." It replied in a strange voice.
Sauron knew that it was coming on to him so he quickly tried to change the subject. "So ah, how bout them Vikings?" He croaked out nervously, but the girl just kept staring at him. He could not resist her beauty he had to have her.. And this is the part where I probably cut out as it 'gets a little blue' from here.
*******************************************
"I'll show you mine if you show me yours." Legolas whispered to Aragorn in the bushes. He nodded, and you could hear a couple of pairs of pants unzip. "Wow." Legolas commented. "It's so small!"
"Speak for yourself Leggy Boy!" Aragorn snapped back.
Gimli was confused about what was going on back there so he decided to investigate. He slowly crept toward the bushes; he could hear their voices whispering back and forth about their things. He was almost to the bushes when he let go of a huge and very smelly fart. "Damn it! I ripped my pants again!"
"Can't breath!" Legolas choked out, Aragorn just nodded as he was too dizzy to speak.
"What the hell are you too doing back their?" Gimli asked. "It would seem that you two were comparing your Teletubbie undies."
"So what if we are?" Aragorn stated with an attitude.
"Well than you two are obviously having an affair. Aragorn what would Arwen think of all this?" Gimli asked.
"We're not having an affair Gimli, God we were just comparing the size of the Teletubbie characters on our tighty whities. That's all!" But before Aragorn could finish explaining it all to Gimli they heard the screams, and went racing off to save the day.
*******************************************
"Guys, I'm am totally freaked out right now!" Don exclaimed.
"Totally!" Added Mike.
The turtles prepared to charge the unknown person when Z-man spoke out to them. "Stop I am Z-man, I was sent here to escort you to Rohan. Follow me."
The turtles were really confused at this point, but they were lost anyway so they decided to follow him. "What about our car?" Leo asked.
"My forest will watch over it until you return." Replied Z-man the magnificently good looking.
So they went on their way back to the camp until they ran into the other three. "What the hell? Hat's going on, I'm really getting confused." Commented Legolas.
"All will be explained tonight, now come there is much to do." Z-man quickly said and hurried on.
So they all headed back to the camp that Gimli set up, as the other two were busy "comparing" their stuff. Z-man explained how the note they read was not from Splinter, but from Gandalf. Everyone was confused about how the Turtles got to Middle Earth. So Z-man carefully and slowly told them that when the Turtles reached the address that was given to them, Gandalf opened a portal that sucked them into Middle Earth. "Gandalf informed me of this so that I could rendezvous with them and take them to Rohan, and that is how I know so much." Z-man continued. "And that is why we must reach Rohan no later than tomorrow afternoon, so we must leave at dawn."
"Well I think we need a little story to lighten the mood, I nominate myself." Gimli recommended.
"Oh God no!" Screamed Aragorn. "We have exactly five minutes to retreat five hundred yards from the area before he starts his cake story! Run!" Everyone took off but Gimli, who stayed to tell his cake story to himself.
***********************************************
It was dawn and the Fellow ship had awoken. The Turtles were discussing Gimli's magnetic personality; there was something that they liked about him that they couldn't quite put their finger on. Aragorn was cooking breakfast, Legolas was bathing; wanting to try out his new shampoo he got in the mail yesterday, Z-man was preparing for the long hike to Rohan, and of course, Gimli was pestering Aragorn, wanting to know when the food would be done. "Breakfast is ready!" Aragorn announced.
Gimli gasped and came running to grab a plate and dig in. He would've taken the whole thing for himself if Aragorn didn't hit him on the head with a spoon telling him to move along. "I'm not eating off of that spoon anymore." Commented Legolas, who was clearly disgusted with the spoon, and Gimli.
"What are you talking about, the spoon is fine. See, I'll eat with it." Aragorn took one spoonful of gruel and his face turned green. He quickly ran to the shrubs and vomited it up. Legolas just smirked, knowing he was right again, as always.
As soon as everyone was done eating and Gimli was done bathing, (The Fellowship insisted on it.) Z-man announced that they must move out. So they set out for Rohan, not knowing what types of danger they might encounter on the way there.
A/N: So what do you think? Tell me, I accept anonymous reviews too, so you have no excuses not to review it. Please tell me what you think!
