Chapter Fourteen: Mishaps and Mayhem
"Wow, this place is beautiful!" Florence exclaimed, as she gazed at the sights of Costa del Sol all around them. "Or at least it would be if the average weather here wasn't flooding... Or if the biggest highlight of the town wasn't the Museum of Cheese and Rotten Ham... Or if the beach wasn't covered in trash and rejects from the museum."
"Okay, so perhaps I should have figured out where Doofus was going before we just jumped on a boat over here. Still, I was right wasn't I? We were lead to Olaf, weren't we?" Harry reasoned as the group was getting soaked by rain.
"Yeah, and we defeated him!" Jim exclaimed, jumping into the air, and crashing into a puddle that sent mud all over Sarah.
"Oh no, he's still out there. We only stalled him. He's preparing for his next big move, and we have a long way to go until he's defeated. So, while he's gathering his power so he can crush us like ants, we're going to Bronze Bowl!" Harry giggled with glee.
"Uh, Harry... They closed that place down five years ago," Jessica informed.
"No they didn't. Ah Jess, you're just so crazy. So, who wants to go to the Museum of Cheese and Rotten Ham before it closes?" Harry didn't wait for a response and dashed off through the rain and the puddles towards the museum.
"Oh great, here we go again," Jessica sighed, as Jim ran off to join him.
"Can't we at least change out of these stupid sailor outfits?" Florence called out to Jim and Harry, who were quickly escaping. "Great, just great. They run off and leave us girls out in the rain. Do you want to just go some place dry and let them go off and have fun?"
"Sure," Jessica replied. "Maybe with some luck, they won't come back." The two chuckled and, followed by Sarah, went off to a nearby café.
"Wow! It's the oldest slice of herrgardsost in the world!" Jim exclaimed, pressing his face up to a piece of glass. Behind it was a slice of yellow cheese, at least, it might have been yellow. It was difficult to tell beneath the many layers of mold.
"Hey Jim, look! It's the legendary schabzieger!" Harry waved Jim towards him. "I heard that this cheese was only made in Mideel."
"Wasn't that place destroyed years ago?"
Harry nodded. "This must be the last cone left. It really makes you think, doesn't it Jim? Jim?" He glanced up to find Jim gone. "Oh boy, where did he run off to now?"
Jim looked up at a large sculpture made entirely out of blue cheese, yet it was the image of a large piece of swiss cheese.
A familiar voice spoke behind Jim, "I made that myself. It really is one of my better pieces. It symbolizes the diversity and oppression of cheese."
Jim pondered the voice for a moment. It seemed so familiar. Where had he heard it before? He looked down to read the name of the sculptor. "Mukki," he muttered softly. "Now where have I heard that name before." He slowly turned around to face the creator of the swiss cheese.
Mukki smiled at Jim. "Well hello there! Remember me, I'm Mukki!"
"Ahhhhh!" Jim screamed and ran from the room as quickly as he could. On his way out he tripped, slammed his head through a portrait of a mouse dancing in some gouda, and then scrambled to find Harry; the ruined portrait hanging from his neck.
"Why does everyone do that?" Mukki sighed, and turned back to admire his work.
Harry was bent over, looking beneath a stool for Jim when the goat farmer, still filled with sudden panic, slammed into Harry. The two went flying and crashed through a glass window into the world famous "Hamvarti Exhibit". Behind the glass was the world's only hamvarti cheese bricks. They were made by fusing ham genes into havarti cheese. The exhibit was in ruin, to say the least. Most of the hamvarti was squished into pancake-like shapes, and some was covered in mud from Jim and Harry's shoes. There was only a single brick in the small exhibit that seemed to be left untouched.
"Mmm... Smells wonderful!" Jim commented as he looked at mess around him. Then he spotted the one unruined piece of cheese, grabbed it and started chewing on it. "Wow, this is great! Harry, try some of this cheese. It's the best stuff I've ever had!"
By this point, museum security was glaring at the two cheese covered heroes, and grabbed them to pull them out of the exhibit. The manager had just arrived on the scene, and saw the wretched mess. He watched as Jim ate the hamvarti in utter horror and despair. "No!" he shrieked. "You imbeciles, you-you buffoons! You've destroyed our most priceless exhibit!" That was all the manager could croak out. He tried yelling something else, but it was nothing but a string of curses, insults, sobs, and squeals. The poor manager finally fell to his knees and, between howls and blubbering, commanded the two to leave.
Security dealt with the pair quickly, tossing them out into the muddy, rain-soaked street without delay. Harry looked up at Jim, mud sliding down his face. "You really are an idiot," he sighed.
"Ah, this is wonderful," Florence sighed happily, as she took a sip of some cocoa. She, Jessica and Sarah were at a little table by the window, looking out at the rain. Jessica and Florence each had a mug of cocoa, and Sarah was cheerfully chewing on some 'Betsy-Brand Goaty Yums'.
"Why are we doing this?" Jessica inquired.
"Doing what?"
"Following Harry and Jim around, trying to save the planet. It doesn't make any sense. I mean, they're just a couple of idiots. They have no clue as to what it is they're doing. The only reason I can think of, is that if we weren't around, they'd probably end up in a dumpster somewhere."
The corners of Florence's mouth creased upwards into a smirk. "Maybe the planet is compelling us to do this. It's like it's our destiny. We have been chosen to follow Jim to the ends of the earth, to save the planet."
"Oh please, Florence! I can't believe you can buy anything that Harry says! I mean, that drunken weirdo without any pants over there is more sensible than Harry Smith."
Florence took another sip from her mug, and was about to speak when the door opened. Jim and Harry sauntered in, covered from head to toe in water, cheese, and mud.
"We got kicked out of the museum," Jim reported sadly. "I don't know what happened. I was just eating some cheese, then the manager started screaming. He said something like, 'It was priceless! Priceless! We're ruined!' That's all I could really make out through all the swearing and the crying. So, we're here."
Jessica calmly put down her mug and proceeded to plant her face into the table. "Just take me now..." she mumbled.
"Well, it was fun CdS, and its Museum of Cheese and Rotten Ham. Perhaps we shall return here one day. Until then... farewell!" Harry waved goodbye to the town and the group began their trek onward.
"I don't know about you guys, but I haven't slept so well in ages," Jim said cheerfully. "And doesn't it feel good to get out of those sailor suits?" "I just wish I slept last night. Unfortunately, someone was too cheap to get a second room for the ladies, so Jim's snoring kept me up all night," Jessica growled, sleepily.
"Hey, I'm sorry! We could only afford the one room. I spent the extra money on summer passes for the Museum of Cheese and Rotten Ham for Jim and me. They're supposed to be getting a nice Edam exhibit in July," Harry defended.
"Come on guys, let's not argue. Let's just enjoy the journey. Right Sarah?" Florence said, trying to remain optimistic. Sarah replied with a goatish grumble. "I don't think she likes wearing your sailor hat, Jim."
"Oh, but it looks so cute on her!" Jim exclaimed. Sarah proceeded to take the hat in her mouth, chew it and spit it into Jim's face.
"Yes indeed! Five close companions, on with the journey of a life time!" Florence smiled and marched forward, towards the mountainous hills, and Bronze Bowl beyond.
"Hello? Is anyone out there?" A lone boat sat out on the water, beneath the white light of a full moon. "I'm stuck at sea..." Muffie sighed, as she tried to paddle her stolen boat with a spoon. "And I'm still a long way from Wutai... And I need more spoons."
There came a stirring from the water. Muffie looked close in the light. "Hello?" The water rippled and a fish leaped from the depths, and a figure was riding on its back. They landed in the boat.
The figure smiled, and spoke softly, "Good evening."
"Wow, this place is beautiful!" Florence exclaimed, as she gazed at the sights of Costa del Sol all around them. "Or at least it would be if the average weather here wasn't flooding... Or if the biggest highlight of the town wasn't the Museum of Cheese and Rotten Ham... Or if the beach wasn't covered in trash and rejects from the museum."
"Okay, so perhaps I should have figured out where Doofus was going before we just jumped on a boat over here. Still, I was right wasn't I? We were lead to Olaf, weren't we?" Harry reasoned as the group was getting soaked by rain.
"Yeah, and we defeated him!" Jim exclaimed, jumping into the air, and crashing into a puddle that sent mud all over Sarah.
"Oh no, he's still out there. We only stalled him. He's preparing for his next big move, and we have a long way to go until he's defeated. So, while he's gathering his power so he can crush us like ants, we're going to Bronze Bowl!" Harry giggled with glee.
"Uh, Harry... They closed that place down five years ago," Jessica informed.
"No they didn't. Ah Jess, you're just so crazy. So, who wants to go to the Museum of Cheese and Rotten Ham before it closes?" Harry didn't wait for a response and dashed off through the rain and the puddles towards the museum.
"Oh great, here we go again," Jessica sighed, as Jim ran off to join him.
"Can't we at least change out of these stupid sailor outfits?" Florence called out to Jim and Harry, who were quickly escaping. "Great, just great. They run off and leave us girls out in the rain. Do you want to just go some place dry and let them go off and have fun?"
"Sure," Jessica replied. "Maybe with some luck, they won't come back." The two chuckled and, followed by Sarah, went off to a nearby café.
"Wow! It's the oldest slice of herrgardsost in the world!" Jim exclaimed, pressing his face up to a piece of glass. Behind it was a slice of yellow cheese, at least, it might have been yellow. It was difficult to tell beneath the many layers of mold.
"Hey Jim, look! It's the legendary schabzieger!" Harry waved Jim towards him. "I heard that this cheese was only made in Mideel."
"Wasn't that place destroyed years ago?"
Harry nodded. "This must be the last cone left. It really makes you think, doesn't it Jim? Jim?" He glanced up to find Jim gone. "Oh boy, where did he run off to now?"
Jim looked up at a large sculpture made entirely out of blue cheese, yet it was the image of a large piece of swiss cheese.
A familiar voice spoke behind Jim, "I made that myself. It really is one of my better pieces. It symbolizes the diversity and oppression of cheese."
Jim pondered the voice for a moment. It seemed so familiar. Where had he heard it before? He looked down to read the name of the sculptor. "Mukki," he muttered softly. "Now where have I heard that name before." He slowly turned around to face the creator of the swiss cheese.
Mukki smiled at Jim. "Well hello there! Remember me, I'm Mukki!"
"Ahhhhh!" Jim screamed and ran from the room as quickly as he could. On his way out he tripped, slammed his head through a portrait of a mouse dancing in some gouda, and then scrambled to find Harry; the ruined portrait hanging from his neck.
"Why does everyone do that?" Mukki sighed, and turned back to admire his work.
Harry was bent over, looking beneath a stool for Jim when the goat farmer, still filled with sudden panic, slammed into Harry. The two went flying and crashed through a glass window into the world famous "Hamvarti Exhibit". Behind the glass was the world's only hamvarti cheese bricks. They were made by fusing ham genes into havarti cheese. The exhibit was in ruin, to say the least. Most of the hamvarti was squished into pancake-like shapes, and some was covered in mud from Jim and Harry's shoes. There was only a single brick in the small exhibit that seemed to be left untouched.
"Mmm... Smells wonderful!" Jim commented as he looked at mess around him. Then he spotted the one unruined piece of cheese, grabbed it and started chewing on it. "Wow, this is great! Harry, try some of this cheese. It's the best stuff I've ever had!"
By this point, museum security was glaring at the two cheese covered heroes, and grabbed them to pull them out of the exhibit. The manager had just arrived on the scene, and saw the wretched mess. He watched as Jim ate the hamvarti in utter horror and despair. "No!" he shrieked. "You imbeciles, you-you buffoons! You've destroyed our most priceless exhibit!" That was all the manager could croak out. He tried yelling something else, but it was nothing but a string of curses, insults, sobs, and squeals. The poor manager finally fell to his knees and, between howls and blubbering, commanded the two to leave.
Security dealt with the pair quickly, tossing them out into the muddy, rain-soaked street without delay. Harry looked up at Jim, mud sliding down his face. "You really are an idiot," he sighed.
"Ah, this is wonderful," Florence sighed happily, as she took a sip of some cocoa. She, Jessica and Sarah were at a little table by the window, looking out at the rain. Jessica and Florence each had a mug of cocoa, and Sarah was cheerfully chewing on some 'Betsy-Brand Goaty Yums'.
"Why are we doing this?" Jessica inquired.
"Doing what?"
"Following Harry and Jim around, trying to save the planet. It doesn't make any sense. I mean, they're just a couple of idiots. They have no clue as to what it is they're doing. The only reason I can think of, is that if we weren't around, they'd probably end up in a dumpster somewhere."
The corners of Florence's mouth creased upwards into a smirk. "Maybe the planet is compelling us to do this. It's like it's our destiny. We have been chosen to follow Jim to the ends of the earth, to save the planet."
"Oh please, Florence! I can't believe you can buy anything that Harry says! I mean, that drunken weirdo without any pants over there is more sensible than Harry Smith."
Florence took another sip from her mug, and was about to speak when the door opened. Jim and Harry sauntered in, covered from head to toe in water, cheese, and mud.
"We got kicked out of the museum," Jim reported sadly. "I don't know what happened. I was just eating some cheese, then the manager started screaming. He said something like, 'It was priceless! Priceless! We're ruined!' That's all I could really make out through all the swearing and the crying. So, we're here."
Jessica calmly put down her mug and proceeded to plant her face into the table. "Just take me now..." she mumbled.
"Well, it was fun CdS, and its Museum of Cheese and Rotten Ham. Perhaps we shall return here one day. Until then... farewell!" Harry waved goodbye to the town and the group began their trek onward.
"I don't know about you guys, but I haven't slept so well in ages," Jim said cheerfully. "And doesn't it feel good to get out of those sailor suits?" "I just wish I slept last night. Unfortunately, someone was too cheap to get a second room for the ladies, so Jim's snoring kept me up all night," Jessica growled, sleepily.
"Hey, I'm sorry! We could only afford the one room. I spent the extra money on summer passes for the Museum of Cheese and Rotten Ham for Jim and me. They're supposed to be getting a nice Edam exhibit in July," Harry defended.
"Come on guys, let's not argue. Let's just enjoy the journey. Right Sarah?" Florence said, trying to remain optimistic. Sarah replied with a goatish grumble. "I don't think she likes wearing your sailor hat, Jim."
"Oh, but it looks so cute on her!" Jim exclaimed. Sarah proceeded to take the hat in her mouth, chew it and spit it into Jim's face.
"Yes indeed! Five close companions, on with the journey of a life time!" Florence smiled and marched forward, towards the mountainous hills, and Bronze Bowl beyond.
"Hello? Is anyone out there?" A lone boat sat out on the water, beneath the white light of a full moon. "I'm stuck at sea..." Muffie sighed, as she tried to paddle her stolen boat with a spoon. "And I'm still a long way from Wutai... And I need more spoons."
There came a stirring from the water. Muffie looked close in the light. "Hello?" The water rippled and a fish leaped from the depths, and a figure was riding on its back. They landed in the boat.
The figure smiled, and spoke softly, "Good evening."
