Deblovesdragon - its not yeh you for guessing right - until you wrote that
review it was actually going to be Minerva. After all she would be hardly
any more out of character than Dumbledore in telling Hermione to go for it!
But then the devious little plot bunny started.
Severus's suspicions about Malfoy were confirmed, at least to Hermione's satisfaction the next morning at breakfast. Not that she'd had much doubt. He seemed the most likely candidate when you considered opportunity - he was most likely to be able to break into Snape's stores and steal the polyjuice and Severus had admitted that Draco had access to his private rooms. She didn't ask why. There were some things she was probably better of not knowing. She was eyeing another plate piled high with food with rueful amusement, when she was surprised by a jawbreaking yawn. Her eyes met Draco's across the table, and she could tell from his smug grin that he knew why she was tired and hungry.
His amusement faded when she smiled back at him. Not the contented, dreamy smile of a sated woman, but the feral grin of a woman who could see into the future and knew exactly what it held for annoying little Slytherins. A sideways glance to Severus confirmed Draco's fears. He was in trouble.
He had expected a little more gratitude, but from the gleam in Severus's eye he was going to be bitterly disappointed. After all, it wasn't as if either of them had crowds of people beating their door down begging them for a shag. They should definitely be grateful to him.
He suddenly realised that he was smirking, and that was probably unwise in the present circumstances. The rest of his face seemed to be trying to distance itself from the smirk in embarrassment.
Oh shit, he was really in trouble now. Time for a little damage limitation. Or blackmail as sterner critics would have it.
Hermione left breakfast before her devoted followers, giving him an opportunity to corner her alone on one of the staircases to the second floor.
"Well, Granger. You certainly look . tired this morning," he said, leering at her suggestively.
"I've been studying hard for the NEWTS, Malfoy. What's your point?" she replied calmly.
"Studying eh?
She decided to take the bull by the horns, or she would have to stand there for hours listening to what passed for wit and innuendo. She wouldn't want to waste any of her precious Saturday on him at the best of times, and it wasn't the best of times. She badly needed to catch up on some sleep.
"Yes. Professor Snape has been kind enough to offer me some extra tuition in potions." That should bring matters to a head nicely she thought, and sure enough the little ferret could resist the chance to sneer.
"I am sure that Professor Dumbledore would be surprised but delighted to hear that Professor Snape had decided to take a Gryffindor under his wing in that way. Perhaps I ought to ask for some extra coaching as well."
Over my dead body. On second thoughts. Over your dead body. "I don't think you need any extra help with potions, do you Malfoy? I'm sure Dumbledore would be delighted, but not surprised, to hear how well you are doing in that area." Hermione was overjoyed to be able to introduce Draco to a muggle concept - mutually assured destruction. The little tosser couldn't dob her in for extra-curricular shagging without admitting his own part in bringing those activities about. Result - a draw. Until Severus took a hand anyway.
He took the point immediately. He decided to try another track. "You really ought to be thanking me, Granger. You two would never have got it together without my help."
"Now that I doubt. It might have taken a little longer but it would have happened."
"I still don't see what the problem is?"
Hermione declined to mention the nakedness issue. "The problem, Malfoy, that you seem to have so much difficulty getting your head round is that your little stunt could have got me expelled and Severus sacked."
"That would have been an added bonus, I grant you but unlikely. I hardly think you were going to go up to McGonagall the next day and start discussing your sex life . Dear Merlin, Granger, you didn't?"
She nodded.
Her dislike of Draco only intensified when he broke out into great whoops of laughter. "How I wish I had been there to see it!"
Their conversation was brought to a premature end by the arrival of Harry and Ron, who came bustling up to Hermione's rescue. As they saw it anyway. Hermione didn't think she needed rescuing at all, and was rather annoyed that this interruption would give Draco the chance to get off the hook.
"What do you want Malfoy?" Ron asked aggressively, his hand hovering over his wand.
"Is he bothering you, Hermione?" Harry said.
A triumphant gleam sparked in Malfoy's eyes. The Boy-who-lived-twice and his little sidekick. He had found his leverage. "I was just commenting on how tired poor Hermione looks. I wonder what she's been doing so late at night?" and with that parting shot, he turned on his heel and headed off.
"What was that about?" asked Harry, looking worried. "You do look awfully tired."
"Thanks, Harry," she said dryly. "You know how to make a girl feel good."
"Come on, Herimione. You know we don't have secrets?" whined Ron.
"Malfoy was threatening to tell you who I spent last night with," she said. They looked at her in shock. Hermione. Sex. Good God.
A brief look of panic flashed across Ron's face, as he remembered his short lived romance with her. He felt a fleeting empathy for the poor bloke Hermione had in her toils now. Poor sod wouldn't know what had hit him. He hadn't even been able to masturbate for a whole day after their night of passion. He has tried, almost as a matter of habit, but when he had extracted himself from his clothes it seemed to him that it was staring at him reproachfully. How could you? it seemed to be saying. How could you allow something that frightening to happen to me, your old friend? Haven't we stuck together through thick and thin, through all of adolescence, and then this? He had patted himself soothingly, and put it away. He hadn't been able to look himself in the eye.
He hadn't seen anyone looking particularly traumatised this morning though, so perhaps she had been gentle with them. The look of panic returned and intensified as another thought struck him. "Please tell me you haven't," he pleaded.
"Haven't what?"
"Been having a fling with Malfoy?" he shuddered.
Hermione laughed. "Much worse," she said cheerfully. She wasn't sure whether now was the right time to tell the boys, but they would have to be told eventually. And at least this way Malfoy wouldn't be able to keep it hanging over her head as a bargaining tool.
Ron smiled. "Worse than Malfoy? Let me guess, you've been having a wild affair with Crabbe? With Goyle? With Crabbe AND Goyle?"
"Worse than that."
"Worse than Crabbe and Goyle? I don't believe it's possible," said Harry. "Go on, give us a clue. What house is he in?"
"Slytherin," she replied.
As they headed back to the Common Room, the boys entertained her with increasingly wild guesses as to the identity of her mystery lover. When reciting the names of all the Slytherin seventh years failed to get a response, they started on the girls.
They settled in front of the fire, eating sweets from Honeydukes and running through as many combinations of girl/girl, boy/boy and girl/boy Slytherins they could think of.
She was laughingly protesting that she was only involved with one Slytherin, and not the whole house, when Harry suddenly remembered the way Snape had looked at her in potions the day before.
He hadn't been giving her the evil eye at all, he had been letching after her. It all made sense. Detention. "It has to be Snape."
"No, come on mate. That's going a bit far," said Ron. His voice trailed away as he noticed Hermione's expression. Guilt, a little, and nervousness as she waited to see their reaction, but chiefly an enormous, soppy grin.
"Bloody hell," Ron said in awe. "When you go off the rails, you really go off the rails, don't you?"
Severus's suspicions about Malfoy were confirmed, at least to Hermione's satisfaction the next morning at breakfast. Not that she'd had much doubt. He seemed the most likely candidate when you considered opportunity - he was most likely to be able to break into Snape's stores and steal the polyjuice and Severus had admitted that Draco had access to his private rooms. She didn't ask why. There were some things she was probably better of not knowing. She was eyeing another plate piled high with food with rueful amusement, when she was surprised by a jawbreaking yawn. Her eyes met Draco's across the table, and she could tell from his smug grin that he knew why she was tired and hungry.
His amusement faded when she smiled back at him. Not the contented, dreamy smile of a sated woman, but the feral grin of a woman who could see into the future and knew exactly what it held for annoying little Slytherins. A sideways glance to Severus confirmed Draco's fears. He was in trouble.
He had expected a little more gratitude, but from the gleam in Severus's eye he was going to be bitterly disappointed. After all, it wasn't as if either of them had crowds of people beating their door down begging them for a shag. They should definitely be grateful to him.
He suddenly realised that he was smirking, and that was probably unwise in the present circumstances. The rest of his face seemed to be trying to distance itself from the smirk in embarrassment.
Oh shit, he was really in trouble now. Time for a little damage limitation. Or blackmail as sterner critics would have it.
Hermione left breakfast before her devoted followers, giving him an opportunity to corner her alone on one of the staircases to the second floor.
"Well, Granger. You certainly look . tired this morning," he said, leering at her suggestively.
"I've been studying hard for the NEWTS, Malfoy. What's your point?" she replied calmly.
"Studying eh?
She decided to take the bull by the horns, or she would have to stand there for hours listening to what passed for wit and innuendo. She wouldn't want to waste any of her precious Saturday on him at the best of times, and it wasn't the best of times. She badly needed to catch up on some sleep.
"Yes. Professor Snape has been kind enough to offer me some extra tuition in potions." That should bring matters to a head nicely she thought, and sure enough the little ferret could resist the chance to sneer.
"I am sure that Professor Dumbledore would be surprised but delighted to hear that Professor Snape had decided to take a Gryffindor under his wing in that way. Perhaps I ought to ask for some extra coaching as well."
Over my dead body. On second thoughts. Over your dead body. "I don't think you need any extra help with potions, do you Malfoy? I'm sure Dumbledore would be delighted, but not surprised, to hear how well you are doing in that area." Hermione was overjoyed to be able to introduce Draco to a muggle concept - mutually assured destruction. The little tosser couldn't dob her in for extra-curricular shagging without admitting his own part in bringing those activities about. Result - a draw. Until Severus took a hand anyway.
He took the point immediately. He decided to try another track. "You really ought to be thanking me, Granger. You two would never have got it together without my help."
"Now that I doubt. It might have taken a little longer but it would have happened."
"I still don't see what the problem is?"
Hermione declined to mention the nakedness issue. "The problem, Malfoy, that you seem to have so much difficulty getting your head round is that your little stunt could have got me expelled and Severus sacked."
"That would have been an added bonus, I grant you but unlikely. I hardly think you were going to go up to McGonagall the next day and start discussing your sex life . Dear Merlin, Granger, you didn't?"
She nodded.
Her dislike of Draco only intensified when he broke out into great whoops of laughter. "How I wish I had been there to see it!"
Their conversation was brought to a premature end by the arrival of Harry and Ron, who came bustling up to Hermione's rescue. As they saw it anyway. Hermione didn't think she needed rescuing at all, and was rather annoyed that this interruption would give Draco the chance to get off the hook.
"What do you want Malfoy?" Ron asked aggressively, his hand hovering over his wand.
"Is he bothering you, Hermione?" Harry said.
A triumphant gleam sparked in Malfoy's eyes. The Boy-who-lived-twice and his little sidekick. He had found his leverage. "I was just commenting on how tired poor Hermione looks. I wonder what she's been doing so late at night?" and with that parting shot, he turned on his heel and headed off.
"What was that about?" asked Harry, looking worried. "You do look awfully tired."
"Thanks, Harry," she said dryly. "You know how to make a girl feel good."
"Come on, Herimione. You know we don't have secrets?" whined Ron.
"Malfoy was threatening to tell you who I spent last night with," she said. They looked at her in shock. Hermione. Sex. Good God.
A brief look of panic flashed across Ron's face, as he remembered his short lived romance with her. He felt a fleeting empathy for the poor bloke Hermione had in her toils now. Poor sod wouldn't know what had hit him. He hadn't even been able to masturbate for a whole day after their night of passion. He has tried, almost as a matter of habit, but when he had extracted himself from his clothes it seemed to him that it was staring at him reproachfully. How could you? it seemed to be saying. How could you allow something that frightening to happen to me, your old friend? Haven't we stuck together through thick and thin, through all of adolescence, and then this? He had patted himself soothingly, and put it away. He hadn't been able to look himself in the eye.
He hadn't seen anyone looking particularly traumatised this morning though, so perhaps she had been gentle with them. The look of panic returned and intensified as another thought struck him. "Please tell me you haven't," he pleaded.
"Haven't what?"
"Been having a fling with Malfoy?" he shuddered.
Hermione laughed. "Much worse," she said cheerfully. She wasn't sure whether now was the right time to tell the boys, but they would have to be told eventually. And at least this way Malfoy wouldn't be able to keep it hanging over her head as a bargaining tool.
Ron smiled. "Worse than Malfoy? Let me guess, you've been having a wild affair with Crabbe? With Goyle? With Crabbe AND Goyle?"
"Worse than that."
"Worse than Crabbe and Goyle? I don't believe it's possible," said Harry. "Go on, give us a clue. What house is he in?"
"Slytherin," she replied.
As they headed back to the Common Room, the boys entertained her with increasingly wild guesses as to the identity of her mystery lover. When reciting the names of all the Slytherin seventh years failed to get a response, they started on the girls.
They settled in front of the fire, eating sweets from Honeydukes and running through as many combinations of girl/girl, boy/boy and girl/boy Slytherins they could think of.
She was laughingly protesting that she was only involved with one Slytherin, and not the whole house, when Harry suddenly remembered the way Snape had looked at her in potions the day before.
He hadn't been giving her the evil eye at all, he had been letching after her. It all made sense. Detention. "It has to be Snape."
"No, come on mate. That's going a bit far," said Ron. His voice trailed away as he noticed Hermione's expression. Guilt, a little, and nervousness as she waited to see their reaction, but chiefly an enormous, soppy grin.
"Bloody hell," Ron said in awe. "When you go off the rails, you really go off the rails, don't you?"
