CHAPTER V

I kept walking until I was out of Surrey and caught a cab. Finally being able to relax I sat and pondered over all that had just came out of my mouth.

"Where did that come from? How could I cast that curse on anyone? Even if they did deserve it? Even though all I said was true, the way I said it was so cruel and cold." I thought to myself.

"I would have no qualms about killing you." That phrase had been repeating through my thoughts all the way out of Surrey.

"How could I say that? Did I really mean it?"

In the bottom of my heart, I knew it was true. I know I could kill him if I had to, the only thing standing in my way is the thing I treasure above all else. My ability to love, the love for my friends, Sirius and the parents I never knew.

My emotions, it is the source of all my power and my weaknesses. What would the people I love think if I went about killing people? That would make me just as bad as the deatheaters wouldn't it? My thoughts left me confused.

Voldemort however had no emotions aside from hate and anger. Perhaps if, but my train of thought was interrupted by the cab driver asking for his money. Paying the man I stepped out of the car at King Cross Station.

"That was a longer drive than I thought." I said to myself as I began walking toward the platform. I hoped against hope that the Hogwarts express ran during the summer holidays. If not then I would have to get another cab to London.

"Mr. Potter, I figured you would come here." I froze, that voice, the cynical silent sarcasm that was so familiar.

"Professor Snape, I think you know exactly why I'm here," I replied suddenly tired of all his games of cat and mouse. "Is there a place where we can talk privately for a moment?" I asked.

"Well I do believe that there is no one else on this platform at this moment Mr. Potter so whatever it is you have to say you can say it right here," he replied being as stubborn as ever.

"Oh damn it, why does he have to be so stubborn?" I asked silently. "Oh how will I make him understand he is being watched? Oh, I know!"

"Professor, what will you get when you add the guildaberry root and asphodel together at the right temperature and speed of stir?" I asked him.

"Aggh yes of course, follow me then," he replied.

I followed him into a restroom off to the side.

"Very well Mr. Potter take holed of this, I'm sure you're aware of what this is and trust me enough to take hold of it," he said.

"Of course professor." Both grabbing the sock we were pulled from the bathroom to an unfamiliar study.

"Well Mr. Potter please have a seat. I believe we have a few, issues to discuss," he said. "I'm aware that you were trying to tell me that someone was watching us or was invisible. Are you aware of who it was?" he asked leaning back into his chair.

"Yes, Lord Voldemort sent Pettigrew out to follow you when you left the deatheaters meeting. He was to follow you and make sure you were loyal to his cause. I don't know if he was invisible or if he was in rat form. But I'm almost positive Sir," I said.

"Well Potter, I must say that I am impressed. After I reported in to Dumbeldore he requested that I come and make sure you did not do anything foolish and to get you someplace safe. I waited at the train station hoping you would show. I did not know if you were foolish enough to try to take the knight bus or not so I took a chance, gave you some credit for common sense and went there.

I do appreciate your information about being spied on, though I did see a rather shaken up Malfoy come my way bantering on about the good going mad and something about a Crucio curse. You wouldn't happen to know anything about that now would you?" he asked me.

And just like that, I spilled out my whole summer to him. I guess that not having anyone to talk to kind of had its affects on me, not that I would ever tell my friends or Sirius about my summer. They just would not have understood. Somehow, I think I can relate to Snape. He is almost the only person I have ever been this comfortable talking to about these things and I have no idea why. In fact, he is the ONLY person I have ever talked to about my "family."

After the boy stopped talking, I took a good look at him. In the dim light I could see bruises but that was it. However, the amount of time his injuries has gone untreated there is no telling what other problems he may have acquired. Aside from that, all the emotions and anger in him took me by surprise. After his story about Lucious I began to see him in a whole different light.

"Come Mr. Potter," I said to him.

I stepped out of my study and into brightly lit halls. I lead him down tunnels and turns finally stopping in front of a portrait of my aunt. "Medicine" I call out. Stepping into the room I motion for him to sit on one of the hospital beds. I pull over a tray of potions and begin to work. "I need you to remove your outer clothing please." I state.

I look up at my professor in surprise but did as he asked. I removed my robe and trousers then my T-shirt until I was left standing in my boxers and socks.

I breathed in sharply; the boy was nothing but bones, covered in bruises and welts. Blood was coming from somewhere though through all the bruising I could not tell exactly where. On his back there was a particularly large, nasty bruise. That combined with the broken ribs (of which I could see through the translucent skin on his chest) probably made it difficult for him to breath.

Choosing several jars of potion I gave them to him. First was a pain- numbing potion, (because bone-setting potions tended to be a bit painful). Next I gave him the potion to set his broken bones and rubbed a bruise soothing salve onto his bruises and welts.

Through it all, the boy remained silent, for that I was thankful for I would not have known what to say. After giving the boy some food, which he only ate a handful of, I lead him into a bedroom close to my own so I could keep my eye on him.