Bubble bath 8
He had to give them credit though; they didn't back down. In Harry's case he suspected this was due more to stupidity than courage; not that there was necessarily a great deal of difference between the two. He said nothing but stood back to allow them into his quarters. He couldn't stifle a yawn and both boys winced. Apparently they weren't very happy at the thought of the finer details of what went on between him and Hermione. If all else failed, he could always try comparing notes with Ron. They should be heading for the door in five seconds flat.
In the interests of decent relations with Hermione, he waved them to the sofa. He couldn't help smirking when he thought of what he had used it for the night before. Ron seemed to pick up on that because he gave the inoffensive piece of furniture a very hard stare before sitting down.
Harry, living up to Severus's view as someone who rushed in where angels' feared to tread, fired the opening salvo in the battle for Hermione's heart and mind; and in Severus's case, body.
"You'd better treat her right, you know, or you'll have to answer to me!"
Severus wanted to ask quite what the little twerp thought he could do about it if he didn't treat her right. Really, Harry seemed to think that polishing off Voldemort - with a lot of help from others, and the full weight of prophecy behind him - meant he was invincible. How he itched to prove him wrong. Unfortunately, Hermione would probably object if he returned Harry to the Gryfindor common room in pieces.
He wondered for a split second if it was all worth it, and then memories of the night before came flooding back. Oh yes, it definitely was worth it.
So he merely assured Harry that he had every intention of treating her well.
Taken aback by this mild response, Harry was at a loss for something to say. His mouth worked silently for a couple of seconds, and then he said, "I think it's disgusting the way you took advantage of Hermione."
"She started it." The reply was infinitely childish, but rather good fun nonetheless. As he suspected, it added fuel to the flames. Harry was on the point of launching into a diatribe against his morals, his temperament and his appearance - all well deserved he suspected - when Ron interrupted.
"Don't be daft, Harry. Hermione is perfectly capable of looking after herself. She knows what she wants, and she goes and gets it." Ron shuddered at the memories.
"Yes, she does, doesn't she?" Severus said with a fond note in his voice. Severus and Ron looked at each other.
Severus was surprised to feel some sympathy for the boy. Even he had some difficulty dealing with Hermione in full flow, so he could only imagine what it had been like for the poor little sod. He had no experience, no knowledge and above all no recourse to a well-stocked potions room in case of emergency.
For his part for the first time in his time at Hogwarts, Ron felt a reluctant respect for Professor Snape. He had bedded Hermione and not only lived to tell the tale, but apparently had enjoyed the experience, and felt strong enough to go back for more. He supposed that dealing with Voldemort and crucio had toughened him up, but still, that was bravery of a different kind.
He sighed. Harry was on to a loser here, and needed to be put into reverse as soon as possible. There was a reason he always beat Harry at Wizard's Chess.
"Leave it, Harry. We're not going to get anywhere with Snape. We didn't think it through properly. He may not be able to hex us, because Hermione would get upset, but we can't be nasty to him or she'll hex us or worse."
"You're not as stupid as I thought," was all that Severus said, which he thought was quite mild bearing in mind he had just been addressed as Snape. Perhaps an accommodation could be reached.
Ron shrugged. "You always get overlooked when you're the sidekick. Overlooked and underestimated. I'm used to it by now."
"Bloody useful though," said Severus, with some feeling. "Tends to increase your chances of survival - you've always got someone to hide behind. I always used to let Lucius go first." They both smirked at that, whilst Harry looked dim, as only Harry could. Severus felt relieved. The lad Weasley appeared to have a sense of humour and a grasp of the situation. He thought that they would at least come to an understanding, and maybe more. They could certainly have a lot of innocent fun at Harry's expense.
Harry couldn't quite work out how it had happened, one minute they had been barrelling down here to have a go at Snape and rub his nose in the fact that he had to be nice to them from now on, the next Ron and Snape were acting like the best of friends. He couldn't see how it was going to get any worse.
He really should have known better; whatever gods there are in the world cannot resist a cue like that.
There came a knock at the door. Severus opened it to find Hermione, which was a relief in many ways. He didn't fancy explaining what the boys were doing in his room to anyone else.
"I've missed you," she said in a very sultry voice.
"I've missed you too," he said a bit stiffly. It was embarrassing to be soppy in front of the boys. She looked a little disappointed at the coldness of her welcome, so he quickly added, "And I believe Harry and Ron have missed you too."
She followed him through, and sat next to him on the sofa. Sod it! he thought, and held her hand. He was rewarded with a warm smile, and a quick squeeze of his fingers.
"So what have you two been up to?" she asked, in a very pointed way.
"We were just thinking of something to do to Malfoy," Severus said. He didn't particularly feel like standing in the way of Hermione's wrath being vented on the boys, but tactics dictated it. They should be grateful.
Hermione gave him a hard look, then asked, "And what had you decided?"
There was an awkward silence as the males in the room tried to think of a punishment for Malfoy on the spur of the moment. Ron broke the silence by asking, "What had you thought of Hermione? After all, it was you he insulted, so I'm sure you have a couple of ideas of your own."
There was no doubt that the boy was more intelligent than he was given credit for, thought Severus. That level of slithering out from trouble was worthy of a Slytherin. Of course Hermione hadn't been deceived for one moment, but it gave them a breathing space to think of something nasty to do to Malfoy. In truth, he had been too tired to turn his mind to anything other than the urgent necessity for bed.
She let the matter drop, although the boys would have to be stupid to think that was the end of it. Severus predicted a very robust exchange of views on the matter later, in his absence.
"I don't know," she said thoughtfully. "What is the worse thing that could happen to Malfoy?"
Severus thought about that for a moment, and then the answer hit him. "Of course. I have just the thing. But you will all need to play a part."
He had to give them credit though; they didn't back down. In Harry's case he suspected this was due more to stupidity than courage; not that there was necessarily a great deal of difference between the two. He said nothing but stood back to allow them into his quarters. He couldn't stifle a yawn and both boys winced. Apparently they weren't very happy at the thought of the finer details of what went on between him and Hermione. If all else failed, he could always try comparing notes with Ron. They should be heading for the door in five seconds flat.
In the interests of decent relations with Hermione, he waved them to the sofa. He couldn't help smirking when he thought of what he had used it for the night before. Ron seemed to pick up on that because he gave the inoffensive piece of furniture a very hard stare before sitting down.
Harry, living up to Severus's view as someone who rushed in where angels' feared to tread, fired the opening salvo in the battle for Hermione's heart and mind; and in Severus's case, body.
"You'd better treat her right, you know, or you'll have to answer to me!"
Severus wanted to ask quite what the little twerp thought he could do about it if he didn't treat her right. Really, Harry seemed to think that polishing off Voldemort - with a lot of help from others, and the full weight of prophecy behind him - meant he was invincible. How he itched to prove him wrong. Unfortunately, Hermione would probably object if he returned Harry to the Gryfindor common room in pieces.
He wondered for a split second if it was all worth it, and then memories of the night before came flooding back. Oh yes, it definitely was worth it.
So he merely assured Harry that he had every intention of treating her well.
Taken aback by this mild response, Harry was at a loss for something to say. His mouth worked silently for a couple of seconds, and then he said, "I think it's disgusting the way you took advantage of Hermione."
"She started it." The reply was infinitely childish, but rather good fun nonetheless. As he suspected, it added fuel to the flames. Harry was on the point of launching into a diatribe against his morals, his temperament and his appearance - all well deserved he suspected - when Ron interrupted.
"Don't be daft, Harry. Hermione is perfectly capable of looking after herself. She knows what she wants, and she goes and gets it." Ron shuddered at the memories.
"Yes, she does, doesn't she?" Severus said with a fond note in his voice. Severus and Ron looked at each other.
Severus was surprised to feel some sympathy for the boy. Even he had some difficulty dealing with Hermione in full flow, so he could only imagine what it had been like for the poor little sod. He had no experience, no knowledge and above all no recourse to a well-stocked potions room in case of emergency.
For his part for the first time in his time at Hogwarts, Ron felt a reluctant respect for Professor Snape. He had bedded Hermione and not only lived to tell the tale, but apparently had enjoyed the experience, and felt strong enough to go back for more. He supposed that dealing with Voldemort and crucio had toughened him up, but still, that was bravery of a different kind.
He sighed. Harry was on to a loser here, and needed to be put into reverse as soon as possible. There was a reason he always beat Harry at Wizard's Chess.
"Leave it, Harry. We're not going to get anywhere with Snape. We didn't think it through properly. He may not be able to hex us, because Hermione would get upset, but we can't be nasty to him or she'll hex us or worse."
"You're not as stupid as I thought," was all that Severus said, which he thought was quite mild bearing in mind he had just been addressed as Snape. Perhaps an accommodation could be reached.
Ron shrugged. "You always get overlooked when you're the sidekick. Overlooked and underestimated. I'm used to it by now."
"Bloody useful though," said Severus, with some feeling. "Tends to increase your chances of survival - you've always got someone to hide behind. I always used to let Lucius go first." They both smirked at that, whilst Harry looked dim, as only Harry could. Severus felt relieved. The lad Weasley appeared to have a sense of humour and a grasp of the situation. He thought that they would at least come to an understanding, and maybe more. They could certainly have a lot of innocent fun at Harry's expense.
Harry couldn't quite work out how it had happened, one minute they had been barrelling down here to have a go at Snape and rub his nose in the fact that he had to be nice to them from now on, the next Ron and Snape were acting like the best of friends. He couldn't see how it was going to get any worse.
He really should have known better; whatever gods there are in the world cannot resist a cue like that.
There came a knock at the door. Severus opened it to find Hermione, which was a relief in many ways. He didn't fancy explaining what the boys were doing in his room to anyone else.
"I've missed you," she said in a very sultry voice.
"I've missed you too," he said a bit stiffly. It was embarrassing to be soppy in front of the boys. She looked a little disappointed at the coldness of her welcome, so he quickly added, "And I believe Harry and Ron have missed you too."
She followed him through, and sat next to him on the sofa. Sod it! he thought, and held her hand. He was rewarded with a warm smile, and a quick squeeze of his fingers.
"So what have you two been up to?" she asked, in a very pointed way.
"We were just thinking of something to do to Malfoy," Severus said. He didn't particularly feel like standing in the way of Hermione's wrath being vented on the boys, but tactics dictated it. They should be grateful.
Hermione gave him a hard look, then asked, "And what had you decided?"
There was an awkward silence as the males in the room tried to think of a punishment for Malfoy on the spur of the moment. Ron broke the silence by asking, "What had you thought of Hermione? After all, it was you he insulted, so I'm sure you have a couple of ideas of your own."
There was no doubt that the boy was more intelligent than he was given credit for, thought Severus. That level of slithering out from trouble was worthy of a Slytherin. Of course Hermione hadn't been deceived for one moment, but it gave them a breathing space to think of something nasty to do to Malfoy. In truth, he had been too tired to turn his mind to anything other than the urgent necessity for bed.
She let the matter drop, although the boys would have to be stupid to think that was the end of it. Severus predicted a very robust exchange of views on the matter later, in his absence.
"I don't know," she said thoughtfully. "What is the worse thing that could happen to Malfoy?"
Severus thought about that for a moment, and then the answer hit him. "Of course. I have just the thing. But you will all need to play a part."
