Golden Sun, Garden State
A humor-fic by Father Hulk
Author's Words: Greetings, greetings my dear children! Father Hulk is bringing you a heaping helping of laughs and lunacy! I'm writing this one clear out of the blue on pure whimsy, as the idea came to me like 5 minutes ago. Please review! Good reviews give our God incredible power! Bad reviews will be noshed on with bagels and lox. Enjoy!
SPECIAL NOTE: For the first part, I'm winging it because I have never played Golden Sun: The Lost Age, so I don't know what happens at the Mars Lighthouse. Sorry! V_V
"Isaac, will you do the honors?" Felix asked, extending his palm with the Mars Elemental Star on it.
"Certainly." Isaac took the star, and while his seven companions watched nervously, he tossed it into the center of the Mars Lighthouse. The lighthouse rumbled softly for a bit, and then stopped.
"What's happening?" Garet asked. "Why didn't the beacon light?"
"I don't know." Isaac got on his knees and peered over into the pit. All at once, the huge spherical beacon shot straight up out of the pit, hitting Isaac in the chin and knocking him backwards. "OW, FRICK!" he cried, rubbing his charred face. He noticed the others laughing at him. "What's so funny?"
"Nothing, Isaac," said Mia, helping him to his feet. "Here, I will heal you." She cupped her hands around his chin. Isaac got all dreamy eyed, and then the scars vanished. "All better!"
Isaac grinned. Although he wasn't ready to admit it, he was deeply in love with Mia.
"Okay, the beacon's lit," Jenna said. "Now what?"
"According to legend, the sky will flash with lightning and thunder as the seal upon Alchemy lifts completely," said Sheba.
"Well I don't see the sky flashing," Jenna complained. "Don't tell me we did all this for nothing!"
"Umm, uhh…" came a frustrated mumbling. Everyone turned to see Kraden fiddling with his robes nervously.
"What's wrong, Kraden?" Ivan asked.
Kraden looked at the sky. "Well… it seems to be that… …"
"It seems to be WHAT?" cried Piers. "It's getting cold up here!"
"Well… er… I split the Jupiter star and the Mercury star into two parts back in Sol Sanctum."
"WHAT??" everyone cried. "Why did you do that?"
"Well, Saturos and Menardi didn't know it, but there are actually six lighthouses, not four."
"Are you serious?" Isaac asked.
"Of course I'm serious! There are two lighthouses that remain to be lit."
"But Kraden, we've been all over Weyard. There's nowhere left to explore. Where could these lighthouses be?"
Kraden nodded solemnly. "They are in a country on the other side of the world, called the United States."
"That's a weird name for a country." Ivan mused. "They must be new."
"No, actually, they've been around for over 200 years!"
"Do they know about Psynergy there?" Sheba asked.
"No, I don't think they do. But it's such an odd country. They are broken up into fifty different states, and each one has their own government and so on. Anyway, the state we have to go to is called New Jersey."
"I wonder what happened to Old Jersey?" Garet cracked. Isaac laughed and snorted.
"Ha! You snorted." Sheba said with a playful leer.
"So what are we waiting for?" Piers said crossly. "Let's go to this New Jersey now!"
"All right!" said everyone else, and they all left the lighthouse.
*********************************************************
The jet plane landed at Newark Airport at 12:00 pm, and all 8 party members disembarked and headed through the terminal.
"Now remember what I told you to say," Kraden cautioned them. They nodded.
"Halt," said the uniformed guard, "I'll need to check your bags." He took their travel bags and put them through the x-ray. "Good God!" he cried, as the x-ray machine revealed their swords, shields, maces, and magic staffs. "Do you care to explain all this?"
"We're going to a trade show," Piers said. "At the walkboard." Ivan elbowed him sharply. "I mean, the boardwalk. We are putting these fake weapons on display."
"They were used in the play, McDonalds." An elbow from Jenna. "I mean, MacBeth!"
The guard nodded. "Fine. But I'll need to feel you up." Everyone stared at him. "I mean, pat you down." The guard carefully made sure they weren't hiding anything in their clothes, taking an extra long time with Mia and Jenna. Finally, he let them through.
Once they were outside the airport, Kraden unfolded the big map. "Now, the second Jupiter lighthouse is here, at the tip of Cape May. The second Mercury lighthouse is down here, at Point Pleasant. I think we should split up."
"That's a good idea." agreed Garet.
"Isaac, you go with Mia, Ivan, and Felix to the Jupiter lighthouse. I'll go with Jenna, Sheba, and Garet to the Mercury lighthouse."
"What about me?" Piers asked.
"You have a special assignment. There's a wind adept living in the small town of Ellendun who is quite knowledgeable about the Cape May Jupiter lighthouse. I need you to go and get him. Here's some train fare." Kraden passed him some money.
Piers grumbled. "As you wish, Master Kraden."
"Now, there's nobody after us this time, so take your time, enjoy the sights, have a good time! Kick your heels up a bit. But make sure you make it to those lighthouses."
"Yes, Kraden," they all said.
"Now, let's be off, shall we?"
