Lost in the Shadows

Laura

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I hate this place. I hate the walls, I hate the sheets, I hate the food, I hate the people. I hate everything. I want to get out of here, and fast. But there's nowhere to go. As the saying goes, wherever you go, there you are. I was sitting on the couch in the little excuse for a common room when they ushered that girl in again. This time the other ones were trying to engage me in conversation. Look, to be perfectly honest, I'm a med student. I have full respect and understanding for mental illnesses. But I am not a lunatic. I do not belong here. I do not see visions, I do not hear voices. Whatever I hear or see is real. With the exception of Billy Mahoney, but that's another matter. But, I mean, hey. These scratches are real. These cuts are real. This chipped tooth is real. I'm not a hallucinogenic freak, all right? But anyway, they dragged the girl in. She seemed less emaciated than before, and now she seemed like she was okay, just a little shy. The standard white shirt was far too large for her, and she seemed to swim in it.

"Everyone," said the cotton-candy orderly. "This is Maggie Trenton. This is a big day for her."

I rolled my eyes. Oh please.

"She's been here for six months, but now is her big time to come out into the common room."

Oh. Great. I think I should stay away from this one. If she's spent six months in solitary confinement and maximum security and she still looks like this...

Maggie walked over towards the window nearest me. Her pace was perfectly normal, but she kept looking from side to side at empty corners. She sat down in the window seat and curled her legs up to her chest like a child. What an amazing head case. I sighed and looked down at the empty table. Wonderful. I hate this place. I shot Maggie a glance and stood up. I brushed off the front of my pants and pulled off my glasses, hooking them in the collar of my shirt. Giving the common room one more look, I started walking towards the door. I barely made it out before I heard the thump behind me. I didn't give it any thought and kept on walking down the hall. I made it fifteen feet away before the door slammed shut behind me. I ignored it. At least, I ignored it until someone grabbed my shoulder with a vise-like bony grip. I whirled around to see Maggie staring at me with wide, bloodshot eyes. I took a big step back away from her and laughed.

"Hey!" I said, holding up my hands defensively. "What'd I do?"

She opened and closed her mouth like a fish and then finally managed to squeak out one word.

"Death."

Then she turned away and ran back down the corridor, past the common room and around the corner of the hall.

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"What do you mean I'll never be a doctor?" I yelled, standing up so quickly I knocked the chair over. The shrink nodded primly and laced his fingers together.

"That is part of what the court decided. You, in addition to your time here, will never be allowed access to medical equipment or training again."

I cursed furiously, spitting expletives left and right. I couldn't believe it! First they were going to have me locked up forever in this disgusting little hole and now they are going to keep me from any medical work whatsoever.

"How can you do this? Do you have any idea what I've spent on medical school? How long I've spent in college? I was the best med student, you son of a bitch! I was a f*cking genius! You can't do this to me! I was brilliant!" I yelled, pounding my fist on the desk. The man jumped, but didn't react too strongly.

"I see I may have to resort to alternative measures of keeping you calm, Mr. Wright," he said, and nodded sadly to two orderlies. They walked forward like mechanical dolls and grabbed my arms, shoving me forcibly into the chair. A third one approached with about two or three ccs of some clear liquid in a syringe. The next thing I knew they were injecting this stuff into the crook of my elbow. Everything these days was so unexpected.

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745 words.