Chapter 15 - Monkey Magic

******

A/N to Augusta : Sodding is mild profanity which refers to the act of homosexual
love, for want of a nicer description. Other ways of using it are "sod it" and "you randy
little sod". Sorry you asked? As for Thomas's first words....patience little one, all will
be revealed.
I sincerely apologise to all Michael Jackson fans out there for any offence I may have
caused in this chapter. I'm sorry. :-(
Quick chappie today, I have at least ten angry teacher on my back.

******

Trin regained consciousness. Ah! The three blissful seconds he spent before he
remembered why he was chained upside down in a dungeon.

"Oh buggeration!" he groaned "That Goblin King is sooo dead!"

"Nah! Would've heard otherwise." said a voice from the shadows. Trin struggled to
turn around and face the speaker but failed. From the corner of his eye, he could see a
hairy foot and what looked like a Breville sandwich toaster. "So, what brings you
here?" said the voice, not unkindly.

"Who are you?" cried Trin in terror.

"Oh! How rude of me. I'm Monkey. What's your name?"

"Trin." the alien sniffed.

"Hello Trin. Why are you here?"

"I damned a baby away."

"Oh! The chosen one, I get it." said the Breville Monkey happily "I got locked in here
because I toasted his Majesty's hand accidentally."

"Chosen one?"

"Yeah! That kid is destined for great things, so I've heard. He's going to lead the
Demon Hordes in a rapid take over of the living world."

Uh-oh! This was not good. Trin knew Caradoc could be a little devil but nothing like
this! He hoped that Hilarity was on her way...

******

Meanwhile, Hilarity, Jareth and Thomas had begun their short journey to find the river
Tartarus. The latter two were having a heated music discussion.

"OK, and then he said in an interview that his album sounded like what you would get
if you locked Sting, Stevie Wonder and Michael Jackson in a basement together." said
Hilarity.

"Christ! And I thought I was big headed!" Jareth laughed.

"Well to be fair, it did sound like Sting, Stevie and Jacko...in the sense that it sounded
like a Geordie and a Motown legend beating the crap out of a paedophile." they both
burst out laughing.

"Not quite because I would actually pay to listen to that." said Jareth. He realised that
his friend had stopped giggling. He followed her gaze. There, a few hundred feet
below them at the bottom of the valley lay the river. It didn't really suit being called a
river, it was The River. The river Tartarus was to ordinary rivers what Apollo11 was
to the wheel. Hilarity just looked at it. Eyes wide with wonder.

"You know." she said "This place is making your Labyrinth look like slightly
eccentric garden ornament. I hope you're taking notes."