Chapter 21 - Songs and Lemsip

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Dawn approached as the tiny covered cart, pulled by a lonely mule, made its way
across the hillside. It was nearly a mile away from the swollen river yet the deafening
sound of its waters could still be heard and the land was still enshrouded by the wispy
threads of water vapour that hovered above it. The sickly pink light from behind the
clouds spread like a bruise across the sky and was followed by the dirty orange disk.
The sun never seemed to put much effort into the Land of the Dead or its surrounding
kingdoms. The cart, only made interesting because it was the only stirring object,
plodded slowly to its destination. From their altitude, the passengers could see the
whole of the region stretched out below them like a battle plan on a map.

A passer by would notice the sign on the side of the cart saying "Hoggle's
Halfe-pryced Haberdashery!" ...and the rather short man up front...and the three pairs
of legs dangling out of the back. Hoggle was seriously pissed off when he found a
Goblin King with a stinking head cold in his living room. The fact that this particular
Goblin King was the same one who had terrorised him all his life did not help. Still,
his two new friends had insisted that they bring him along and assured him of his
safety and he soon found that Jareth was in no state to be casting spells. In fact, the
chill he'd caught from being out in the cold had left him as weak as a kitten. A cheery
voice echoed through the dales as they began to descend upon the wide expanse of the
plains. It sang to the tune of 'Glory Glory Alleluia' :

"I know a song that gets on everybody's nerves,
I know a song that gets on everybody's nerves,
I know a song that gets on everybody's nerves,
And it goes just like this...

I know a song that gets on everybody's nerves,
I know a song that gets on everybody's nerves,
I know a song that gets on everybody's nerves,
And it goes just like this...

I know a song that gets on everybody's nerves,
I know a song that gets on everybody's nerves,
I know a song that gets on everybody's nerves,
And it goes just like this..."

Hoggle continued to sing happily, occasionally changing his volume or tempo...

"I know a song that gets on everybody's nerves,
I know a song that gets on everybody's nerves,
I know a song that gets on everybody's nerves,
And it goes just like this..."

"Will you shut up!" shouted Jareth to the Gnome up front.

"No way! This might be the only time in my entire life when I can take advantage of
your weakness... I know a song that gets on everybody's nerves..."

"When we get home, Haggle, you're going to be in serious trouble!"

"I'm not going home, remember. And if even if I was, this would be sooo worth it...I
know a song that gets on everybody's nerves..."

"Fine, sing then. See if I care!" said Jareth and blew his nose loudly. "Stupid lawn
ornament." he muttered.

"Now don't be rude." Hilarity scolded "You're just cranky 'cause you're ill. Take one of
these." she handed him a capsule filled with a yellow liquid.

"That's disgusting! What is it?"

"Lemsip. Takes the edge off. And don't complain so much. It's not as if you've got the
bubonic plague or anything. Everyone gets colds, now it's your turn."

"Actually, I've never been ill." said Thomas suddenly "My planet annihilated disease
when they found a vaccine that could immunise us against all kinds of harmful viruses
and bacteria."

Hilarity was enthralled at this idea but Jareth just glared at him.

"I liked it better when you didn't talk." he mumbled spitefully.