I must have been in my room for less than a half hour when I heard feet shuffling just beyond where the edge of my alcove wall was.

"Mindy?"

It was Leo. He seemed noisier than normal so I figured he wanted his presence known to me. I had planned on going to him later on, but it seemed he beat me to the punch.

"Yes, Leo – what do you want?" I replied casually as I took a break from reading, putting the book down next to me on the bed. I was sitting propped up against the headboard, using my two pillows to cushion my back.

Leo poked his head from around the corner, "May I have a word with you?"

"You can have two if you're nice." I answered with a slight smile.

He grinned a little at my levity. Then, stepping into the room, he became all serious again. He had his hands clasped in front of him as if he was a little uncomfortable. Then, he offered, "I – ah – want to apologize for ... well ... going on the way Raph and I did earlier."

"LEO! Do not apologize for me, you got that?" Raph could be heard quite clearly from the other room.

I couldn't blame him one bit for Leo's assumption. Yet, I wondered if Raph was sorry for the same offense. He was one very stubborn and arrogant turtle; that was certain. However, I had noted his keen understanding of certain truths that his older brother either didn't see or chose not to. Getting away from trouble was sometimes the best action to take. For Raph to realize this, considering how much he enjoyed fighting, said a whole lot about the kind of serious trouble that could at any moment come knocking at their door.

Sighing in frustration and turning slightly towards the sound of Raph's echoing voice, Leo restated himself, "Yeah, you're right Raph." Then he looked back over to me with the most contrite expression, saying, "Guess I can only apologize for my own behavior."

I made him wait for a moment before accepting his groveling. For someone who was being groomed to lead, I figured he needed a little whittling down to size. Leo seemed to blame Raph an awful lot for a great many things gone wrong. I was sure Leo's actions were more self preservation than anything else. Having so much expected from a person makes it difficult to accept imperfection. It was good that he had changed his tune and just focused on himself this time.

Being so favored by his sensei and having to be perfect, or nearly so, must have been a difficult weight to carry. I didn't envy Leo one bit.

The first born in any family always seem to have the greatest expectations heaped upon them. Being an only child, myself, I never experienced any of that, but I did have cousins who were the oldest children in their family unit. They excelled the most, received better grades, and always seemed to be in a position of authority over their younger siblings. They were the mark to be measured up against. Consequently, competition ran pretty stiff and it sometimes became ugly as a result. But the parent who would fall into the trap of doing the comparison game just to get the younger child to do well would only cause more problems in the long run.

Not a good thing to do, by the way, especially with siblings that didn't get along very well; such as Leo and Raph.

Finally, after watching Leo squirm for a moment as he waited for my response, I stated, "I accept your apology, Leo." That's all I said.

But, Leo didn't leave. He watched me watch him. I think he was trying to figure out what next to say and to determine where my mood was currently.

Currently, it was on Donny. I had been trying to get my mind off of him by reading some of my history books; but to no avail. Splinter's inquiry a while ago had upset me. At the moment I was hoping that by whatever method my purple masked friend used to discern my feelings, his brother did not share in that same ability. If he did, Leo chose to ignore it.

"Min," Leo asked, "Don said that you have a van garaged somewhere down the street from where you once lived. Is that true?"

Humph, so he was interested. "Are you telling me that you're considering my idea, then?" I asked him.

"Well, initially I wasn't." Leo explained as he came further into my room. He stood at the foot of my bed like a sentry and it was obvious he wasn't quite comfortable being there. He seemed fidgety, looking around and taking in my collection of books next to my bed. He then continued, "But after talking with Splinter I guess it wouldn't hurt to hear about it."

I smiled, "I'm glad to know that, Leo. Why don't you take a seat?" I motioned my hand towards the edge of my bed.

"No, I'm fine where I am. Just tell me about the van, please." He insisted.

"Well," I looked up at him, "Bill from the diner was using it up until six months ago. His wife took ill a year ago and the treatment required frequent visits to the hospital. The subway would have been too difficult on her, so I offered him my van. After she recovered, Bill kept using it for errands and the like. I didn't use it because I couldn't afford to. When the van broke down and Bill couldn't pay to have it fixed, I garaged it. I really don't know what condition it's in but maybe Don could take a look at it?"

"Hmm...I'm sure Don would be able to fix it, regardless of what's wrong with it. Maybe we can see it sometime?" Leo asked.

"Sure. The garage has a combination lock, so it won't require keys to get in. "I replied eagerly.

I had lost all of my keys weeks ago when I was beaten up. As it turned out, I was glad I had gone with a combo lock. Jack would have wondered what the extra key was for and maybe he would have inquired with Bill about it. Since I never shared with my employer about my personal problems, he would have probably told my ex about the van and then it would have been history. I would have lost it, for sure. Jack had become quite selfish and possessive, obsessively so, in fact. Understanding, now, his illegal doings explained a great many things about him. It was sad, really, since in the end it cost him his life.

It excited me and scared me that Leo was now considering my offer. The excitement was in knowing my friends would be able to get out of town and maybe find a safer place to call home. Yet, I was scared, too, that the worse possible thing could happen to them as a result. They could be discovered by the wrong type of people and then exploited. Worse still, Leo and his brothers might be forced to use their ninjitsu skills to protect themselves and thereby land in jail or a lab for the rest of their lives.

However, there was another undercurrent of unrest that was coursing through me, which Leo tripped upon when he asked his next question.

"And you're sure you can't come with us?" Leo asked.

Hmmm...it seemed like a conspiracy.

"I'm sure!" I replied, maybe a little too tartly.

I was getting a bit impatient with being challenged on this issue. Certainly it was nice to know that I would be missed, but it was doubly hard to stick to my commitment when everyone seemed to be questioning it.

Leo stood there for a moment, the silence becoming so 'deafening' I was ready to ask him to leave.

Finally, he spoke, "I know it's none of my business, but you do realize that Don will miss you an awful lot if you don't come with us."

That was it. "Look, Leo, you're right – it is none of your business. I've made my decision and I'm sticking with it. If you have a problem with that then – well – it's your problem. Okay? Just let it rest for cry'n out loud!" I barked.

Leo's eyes shot up just a bit from my outburst and I could see him working the inside of his cheek nervously. Finally, he bowed a little, saying, "As you wish. Thank you for offering the van to us. I'll have to think about it and get back to you."

With that he quickly left. It's amazing how fast these guys could move, too.

Well, I just sat there on the bed feeling like a heel and wishing I had curbed my tongue before answering Leo that last time. What was it about his comment that bugged me the most? Was it just the fact that everyone kept asking the same question or was my problem in how I was answering it? I shook my head in frustration.

Still, I felt badly speaking to him like I had done. With exception to his recent fight with Raph, Leo had behaved rather well around me; considering he was the primo leader and, therefore, had more rights to be suspicious. He was certainly owed better treatment by me since he had orchestrated my rescue. Without Leo cutting me away from that post piling at the wharf, I would have been seagull food in short order. I owed him and everyone else living in the lair my life. I knew I was going to have to apologize to him, so I decided right then and there to get up and do it.

However, I was no sooner off the bed when I saw Don come swiftly around the corner. Oops, I had a feeling he was going to put me in my place. His expression said as much!

"Min, I want to talk with you please."

Yep, those were words that meant confrontation time.

"Ah, sure, Don, what about?" I asked innocently, but knowing I was guilty.

He gently took me by my arm and sat me firmly down on the edge of my bed. He sat down as well and then forced me to face him. I really didn't want to since the look on his face was quite stern. I had never seen him like that before and it intimidated me quite a bit.

Very softly he chastised me, "You did not have to talk to Leo like that, Min. It was very hard for him to come in here and ask you about the van, all things considered."

I looked away, ashamed, but then Don took my chin in his hand and turned my head back to face him, "Leo's seriously considering leaving. After talking with Splinter and then taking everything into consideration, getting out of New York seems to be our best course of action."

"I'm sorry, Don. I was going to go and apologize to Leo before you came in. Really I was." I explained quickly.

He smiled, "Good. I'm glad to hear that. I know that Leo will appreciate it." Then his look became more serious and determined. "But, I have a question for you – and I want the truth."

Ah oh, what now? "Sure..." I replied as I gulped a little.

He looked deep into my eyes so I wouldn't miss his sincerity, "Do you love me?" Don asked.

I was stunned. What is it about him getting to the point of whatever it was I had been thinking about? It was uncanny. Yet, it was the last topic we both heard together just a while ago in Splinter's car. Maybe it wasn't so strange.

"Okay, maybe I'll tell you if you answer a question from me, first!" I countered, trying to change the subject a little.

"Okay, what is it?" he asked impatiently.

I shot it out, "Can you read minds?"

Don straightened up a little bit and allowed a small smile to crease his face. "Why do you ask?"

Ah, nuts – he can. "Well," I laughed a little, "it's just that on more than a few occasions you've either asked me about something or said something in direct relationship to whatever I had been thinking about." I looked straight into his eyes. I wanted to make sure that if he could but denied it, his pupils would betray him.

However, they never wavered as he responded to my question, "Actually, there is a level to ninjitsu that allows something like mind reading to happen. When one is close to the subject either physically or emotionally, then it's easy to discern what the other is feeling or thinking." Don looked a little uncomfortable as he told me all of this; like I had found out something that I wasn't supposed to. Yet, he couldn't lie to me.

"So ... that's a 'yes'?" I asked him nervously.

Don studied me and fidgeted a little. Shrugging, he said, "I guess. Not like I can read your thoughts perfectly, but I can your emotions and just – well – your body language tells me a whole lot, too."

I sat there vindicated and terrified all at the same time. I just knew it; I really did. But, now that he had confirmed it, I wanted him out of my room. If he could do all of that then why was he asking me that sixty-four thousand dollar question?

Getting back to that question, Don persisted, "Okay, I've answered yours, now you need to answer mine." He took my hand and held my gaze with his own. His eyes were so liquid and honest; a yearning there that went beyond the physical. It was almost spiritual in nature.

"Do I really need to, Don?" I commented. I was resistant to saying those words he wanted to hear; I knew that, so I was trying to skirt around the issue as best I could. But, I was up against a ninja and was completely outclassed. "After all, if you can discern what I'm feeling, why ask me about it?" It was my one last shot to avoid the inevitable.

I really didn't want to be cornered like he was doing to me. I wasn't ready to share how I felt towards him; not yet. It was too soon, it was too uncomfortable for me, and it was too unfair all the way around.

"Don't change the topic, Min. Answer my question. Do you love me?" Don insisted.

"What good would it do either of us if I did?" I replied back forcibly. "You're going away, I'm staying. We'll probably never see each other again." I felt my eyes tear up, but I fought back the deluge threatening to betray my composure.

He studied me and I knew the jig was up. Yet, he kept his expression serious to respect the internal war I was struggling with. A war that I had been fighting against – and losing - ever since that talk I had with Splinter after Don had kissed me the first time.

"I just want the truth is all. I want to hear it from you; not just sense it! I know and realize everything that you just said, but to leave not hearing how you feel about me will be worse than not knowing at all." Don explained softly. "Min, you know what it feels like to be loved and to love back. But for me and my brothers, who would want us? I never thought it could ever happen. And, yet, here I am. To know that you care for me more than as a friend is something I will treasure for the rest of my life. How can you not tell me?"

I sat there terrified of what he was wanting from me. I knew he wouldn't take advantage of me, but there were other reasons why I didn't want to share my true feelings for him.

"I – I'm afraid, Don; okay? I'm afraid that by saying those words to you I would be making your life more miserable in the long run." I continued, frustrated and angry, "What good is it to think about cheesecake day in and day out, only to be denied having any of it? I've given up thinking about things I can never have again."

"Except for anniversaries and birthdays?" he asked me quietly.

"That's different, Don! I made a promise!" I shot back defensively. "How can you bring Brandi into this?" I was hurt.

Gently, Don corrected me, cupping my face with his right hand, "I didn't bring her up, Min – you did. All I'm doing is pointing out the inconsistency of what you just said; that's all." He smiled and assured me as he searched my face, "You think about Brandi all the time; you're consumed with that which you can never have again. I don't fault you for that; I understand it, in fact. But, you need to let go if you're ever going to get on with your life. I think Brandi would want that for you."

I shuddered from the pent emotions that were building up explosively. I didn't know how much longer I could keep the pressure cooker from blowing. Don could sense it and in that moment he embraced me, saying, "I've accepted your commitment to staying behind. After talking with Splinter I've come to realize that loving you as much as I do can only be proven by letting you go."

Well, that pretty much did it for me. The waterworks started and all I could do was to let him hold me. Sobs wracked my body as I cried into his shoulder.

"My leaving will be easier knowing how you feel rather than wondering how you feel." Don explained compassionately. "All I want to hear is if you love me; that's all. I promise not to ever mention again to you about coming with us."

I was beaten. How could I go up against ninja anyway; especially one as intuitive and caring as Don? Yet, the answer he wanted frightened me. The truth of the matter was, if he were human I would have married him. But my biggest hurdle to that was the fact that there wasn't a priest in the entire Catholic faith who would marry us. All they would see was a beast and I knew exactly how they would term that relationship. My whole struggle had been centered on that fact alone. Yet, I didn't see Don or his brothers in that light; no, not at all in fact. Maybe in time the world would come to accept them as people. But so long as my friends kept themselves hidden down below, it would never happen.

However, his sincerity and earnest desire to know my feelings was impossible to deny Don. I knew I had to tell him. It was just a matter of when. Was 'now' the right time? Not knowing how long it would take to get my old van back on the road again might allow opportunities for temptation once my feelings were brought to light. Yet to delay my answer to his request might create resentment in him. I just couldn't afford to let that happen. Not again, anyway.

Simply and between my quaking emotions, I mumbled into his shoulder the words he wanted to hear. They seemed distant to me as I spoke them, but Don heard me loud and clear.

"Yes, I do love you."

He hugged me deeply as if never to let me go.