A/N: Hey everybody! Small change of plans! I had thought that the party would take two chapters, but it just grew bigger and bigger. So it'll be three. And I hope it isn't too boring. But I swear it's ending!
Now please enjoy and don't forget to REVIEW!
*********************************
"Pippin get this garlic bread!", Frodo shouted and threw it to the younger hobbit.
"Oh Frodo what is it for?", Pippin didn't guess the point.
"They're all elves at the other side! Throw it there!", Frodo shouted.
And so Pippin did. "Wow Treebread would be proud! It was a good shot!"
"Yes it was Pip! Yes it was!", Merry, not merry anymore, threw a silver candlestick to the other side.
"Aragorn some of them have seen too many springs – or something like that!", Legolas said.
"And others too few!", Gimli added.
"But I shall die as one of them!", Aragorn stared at the elf.
"Hey you're runing over things! I hadn't said that they were all gonna die!", Legolas seemed indignant.
"Oh sorry Leggy! Let's start it all again!", Aragorn smiled.
"Ok!", Legolas coughed. "Aragorn some of them ha..."
"SHUT UP! We have a war going on here!", Eomer shouted. "Eeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa!!!!!", he screamed and jumped to the other side of the trench brandishing his sword, while Eowyn blew her horn so loud that it was almost breaking.
"Wait for me Eomeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeer!", Faramir shouted and jumped too.
"Eowyn what is it with those two?!", Sam asked.
"Who knows Sam? Who knows?", she sadly shook her head. Then she kept on blowing her horn.
"Look at this! Wow!", Aragorn got something from the ground and his eyes shone.
"Oh my great Eru thank you!", Legolas kneelt and prayed his thanks.
"Oh my they're doomed now!", Gimli laughed.
"Eeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa!!!!!", Aragorn shouted looking wilder than Ghân-buri-Ghân himself. He got up and threw a silver tray to the other side. "YES!", he was about to do the Gondor victory dance.
"Aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiii!", Eomer and Faramir screamed in pain. They were coming back from the other side, all dirty and ripped, but it wasn't enough: they were hit by a flying silver tray as well!
"Oh my Eru! Legolaaaaaaas cover meeeeeeee!", Aragorn tossed Gimli and then jumped to get wounded Faramir and Eomer.
"No one tosses a dwarf!", Gimli angrily said.
"This is no time for pointless arguings! Let's take them from heeeeere!", Aragorn slapped Gimli's neck, who just agreed. So Gimli grabbed Faramir and Aragorn did the same with Eomer, while Legolas shot cutleries with his bow.
****************************
At the other side of the trench, few minutes ago...
"Get dooooown! Something's flying over our heeeeeads!", Celeborn shouted and got down covering his own head.
"What?", Galadriel didn't understand. Then the thing fell upon her. "What's this smell for Eru's sake?"
"Mommy! It is a... garlic bread!", Celebrían was disgusted.
"TAKE IT OFF TAKE IT OFF TAKE IT OOOOOOFF!", Galadriel screamed and, even though still crouched, run – she looked somehow as a dancing Russian cossack, but as they had never heard a word about cossacks (they had never heard a word about Russia indeed), it's ok.
"Calm down my love! I will save you!", Celeborn knightly said, then knightly covered his too sensitive elven nose and knightly took the garlic bread off of Galadriel's head and thew it to the bar – throwing it back to their enemies would surely be worse to the elves, as they would get no harm from a garlic bread at all, those stinking people. "Except for Legolas, but it'd be no good even though!", knighty Celeborn thought to self.
"My paladin!", the White Lady kissed her husband.
"Why are you calling grandaddy by Pippin's daddy name, grandma?!", Arwen was confused.
"Nevermind!", Galadriel sadly looked at her grandaughter.
"What is this noise Valar?", Elrohir covered his all too sensitive elven ears.
"It sounds like a Rohan horn! Must be your muse bro!", Elladan was really upset with his twin.
"Eeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa!!!!", someone shouted and jumped on them. It was, of course, Eomer. Then Faramir jumped after his brother in law. They were brandishing their swords and looked as they had eaten too much pepper.
"Eru the Almighty!", the elves shouted in unison staring frightened at the humans.
"I'll take care of it!", Arwen said and threw a pudding at them. "Everybody now chaaaaaaarge!", she shouted. The elves jumped on the humans like wild animals.
"Retreeeeeat! Retreeeeeeeat! Goooo baaaaack to Minaaaaaas Tiriiiiith!", Faramir shouted at Eomer. Then they both run to the other side of the trench. When they were runing away, they were hit by a silver tray. They both had only time to scream of pain and then see nothing but silver glass.
"I'll go catch theeeeeeem! They'll not run awaaaaaaaay!", Elrohir shouted and got up. Then he was hit by a spoon and fell to the ground.
**************************
"Help us up you rascals!", Gimli angrily shouted at the hobbits, while Legolas kept on shooting cutleries with his bow, covering the in-law's rescuers.
"I knew that that time at the Interceptor would teach me something!", Legolas loudly thought.
"Interceptor?", Aragorn asked. The in-laws were safe at their folks' side of the trench now.
"Yeah a Royal Navy ship! We happened to shoot cutleries as cannon balls!", Legolas said as if he was telling his pal what he'd had for dinner.
"What?", Aragorn looked clueless.
"Nevermind!", Legolas understandly tapped the king's shoulder. Then he pranced away into Eowyn's direction.
"Oh Valar they're dead!", Eowyn screamed. "And it is all my fault!", she knelt weeping as some sissy girl.
"Eowyn for the first time since I knew you you look like a girly girl!", Legolas cheering said.
"I do?", she proudly smiled.
"Yes you really do!", the Mirkwood elf smiled back. Then she stopped crying and kissed his cheek.
Aragorn stared at them and sadly nodded. Then he went to his dead pals.
"Sam do you know athelas?", the king had healing hands.
"I do! The king's leaf – or something like that, isn't it?", the gardener asked.
"Yeah go and get me some!", the king said.
When they were about to leave to look for the herbs, Pippin and Merry stopped them.
"Please don't you do that! Can't you remember what happened when you did it last time?", Pippin said.
"At the book or at the movie? Because it was quite different and...", Sam couldn't finish his sentence because he felt his neck burning.
"The last time you idiot! So I mean the movie, you jerk!", Merry angrily slapped Sam's neck.
"Ooooh, Valar, Merry! You're right, we can't do it, otherwise Arwen will show up!", Aragorn got the point.
"Oh my mighty Eru please don't let me loose my sanity!", Frodo muttered to himself, too scared because he had listened to that conversation.
"If you survive sane through this maddness, you'll never go crazy, Frodo Baggins!", a familiar voice talked to him, but only he could hear.
"Gandalf? Gandalf is that you?", Frodo asked.
"Oh Valar Frodo's gone insane!", Sam knelt weeping watching his master calling for Gandalf all over their side of the trench. "It is the end of all things!"
*****************************
At the other side of the trench, few minutes ago...
"Folks they're winning! We cannot let them win this battle!", Arwen tried to encourage her army.
"They are over numbered!", Elladan got a point.
"We also were at Helm's Deep! We also were at Pelennor fields! And yet we won!", Elrond heroically said.
"Daddy, they won at Helm's Deep! They won at Pelennor fiels!", Elrohir also got a point.
"Oh!", was Elrond's only answer.
"But, my dears... we have a secret weapon!", Celeborn said with a grin.
"Secret weapon? What is it dad?", Celebrían anxiously rubbed her hands.
"Well few of you know that we have also fought at the War of the Ring", Celeborn stated. "Yes, dear children – and dear readers – we fought Sauron's army at Lothlórien – as the dwarves also did in their land", Celeborn was evilly smiling. "And we were also out numbered, but we won! And you know why?", he was misterious, and his people were going mad.
"Speak daddy or anxiety will kill us!", Celebrían couldn't bear it anymore.
Celeborn and Galadriel connived glared at each other. "Because, dear children, we had our secret weapon: the White Lady!", he said with a evil grin.
"Mom? You mean mom is the secret weapon?", Celebrían was disappointed.
"Indeed my dear!", Galadriel kissed her daughter's forehead. "Just watch!"
Then the White Lady concentrated. Her big blue elven eyes stared at nowhere. She became gray and looked really scaring. Everyone but Celeborn stepped back.
Nothing happened – or at least they thought so. Because, at the other side of the trench, Frodo started runing as a mad hobbit – and imagine how a mad hobbit runs! – calling for Gandalf. They could hear distant noises, someone calling for the old Maia.
Arwen smiled. "Hey grandma I always knew hurting people through telepathy could be of a good use someday!", she kissed her grandma's cheek.
They all cheered and did the elven victory dance.
*****************************************
At the other side...
"Strider please do something! Frodo's gone insane!", Sam was hopeless.
"Sam I'm busy now can't you see? I have to take care of Eomer and Faramir!", Aragorn said. "Cooooooomeeeee baaaaack tooo theee liiiight!", he shouted to the in-laws.
"Tsc!", Legolas sadly nodded watching Aragorn trying to cure their pals. "I'm pretty sure that this Gandalf thing is Galadriel's work!", he said.
"The White Lady is cunning!", Eomer woke up and pointed out.
"Indeed! But I know how to deal with her!", it was Eowyn. She was good old fashioned brave Eowyn again.
"Tsc!", Legolas sadly nodded watching Eowyn getting her sword and her shield. "No girly girl anymore!", he muttered.
Then Eowyn reached Frodo, who was runing around their trench side shouting "Gandalf! Gandalf!". "Legolas gimme a hand!", she screamed at the elf. "Hold him!", she said.
Legolas did so. He firmly clasped the hobbit. Then Eowyn stood in front of them brandishing her sword. The colorful lights of the hall were reflecting at her sword, and illuminating Frodo's eyes. "Leave Galadriel!", she shouted. "Leave this old hobbit!", she shouted with her shining sword.
"If I leave Frodo dies!", Frodo angrily said.
"You didn't kill me you won't kill him! GO!", she brandished her sword.
"What? What is it?", Frodo looked helpeless.
"Nothing! Nothing at all!", Legolas said. Then he put an arm around Eowyn's waist and kissed her cheek. "You know, my dear Lady, why you are so amazing? Because no girl would do what you just did, my dear Nazgul-slayer! No girly girl would be so amazing as you are!"
She smiled in amusement. Faramir, who just happened to wake up – yeah, he was not dead – walked to her and kissed her cheek. "Legolas is right, Eowyn! You are amazing!"
"Indeed!", Eomer kissed her cheek too. "Indeed!"
"Oh my! What a Kodack moment we've got here!", Gimli said even though they'd never heard a work about photograph. "But, my dears, WE HAVE A WAR GOING ON HERE!", the dwarf shouted.
"Gimli's right! Folks, they're winning! We've got to do something!", Aragorn was trying to encourage his army.
"But they've got scaring lady – I mean, White Lady!", Pippin was frightened.
"And we've got Shieldmaiden!", Faramir smiled. "The Nazgul-slayer! My wife!"
"My sis!", Eomer said.
"My wife!"
"My sis!"
"My wife!"
"Ai Valar!", Eowyn, Merry, Pippin, Sam, Frodo, Legolas, Gimli and Aragorn whispered rolling eyes.
**************************************
Not really far from there, few minutes ago...
Galadriel fell to the ground as if she had been pushed. "Oh my she'll pay me!", she stared at nowhere squeezing her ring.
"What was it, Galadriel?", Elrond looked worried.
"Evil Shieldmaiden is the only one who can deal with me!", she angrily said.
"Oh!", Arwen mumbled. "But we do have Elrohir!"
"People you are all insane! It was only a few kisses!", Elrohir stated.
"It was only a few kisses! It was only a few kisses!", Elladan mimicked his brother.
"Elladan I was just kissing her cheek! Oh Eru damned crazy people!", Elrohir shouted.
"What? You were kissing her cheek?", Celeborn asked in astonishment. "Freaking in-laws!"
"Elladan, Elrohir, you are the best archers of Middle Earth and Valinor! Do something!", Celebrían ordered.
"We have no arrows!", the twins stated in unison.
"But we do have puddings!", Arwen said with a evil grin.
************************************
At the other side again...
"Watch oooooout!", Frodo screamed. "They're shooting!"
"What is it?", Aragorn asked and then a pudding smashed in his face. "Grrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr!", he angrily bit his tunic's sleeve.
"Disgusting!", Legolas pranced away from there.
But it was a fact: it was raining puddings. They could not escape.
"People, we will need to destroy their puddings!", Aragorn pointed out.
"But how?", Eomer asked.
"Well I've already seen this movie: I'll go there with Sam and we will destroy their puddings!", Frodo said and, along with his faithful servant, crawled into the west – yes, because as we all know, Arwen's family always come from the west wing.
"There're seven elves between Frodo and the puddings!", Aragorn said.
"We gotta do something!", Eomer said.
"We will attack their front! We will march to meet them!", Aragorn smoke his pipe.
"A diversion!", Legolas cunningly said.
"Wow and there goes Mr Obvious again!", Gimli said and everybody but the elf laughed.
Legolas stared at the dwarf. "That's not your line!"
"Oh you're right Mr Obvious!", Gimli then coughed. "Certainty of death! Small chance of success! What are we waiting for?", he said. "Happy now, Leggy boy?"
"Now I am!", the elf prince smiled.
So they all crawled into the west. Aragorn shouted some things about them having to pay the bad they did, or something like that. Then Galadriel and Arwen left their trench.
"Wow don't they look exactly like the Mouth of Sauron?", Eowyn said with a grin.
"Don't you disturb me!", Galadriel was mad.
"Aaaah White Lady are you afraid of me? Huh?", the Rohan girl menancingly said.
"Don't you call Grandma words, you rejected girl!", Arwen pointed out. "Aragorn didn't want ya, did he? Did he?"
"How dare ya? Audacity!", Eowyn shouted.
Elladan, Elrohir, Elrond, Celebrían and Celeborn had also gone out. But when they saw those three dangerous women arguing, they understandly looked at Aragorn's gang. And with that they all – Arwen's freaking family and Aragorn's freaking friends – stepped back to their trenches, leaving the freaking women there about to kill each other.
"Look there! I finally found it! Go me!", Beregond thought to himself. Then he put on a CD. The three girls looked up at him listening to that rock anthem.
***************************************
A little note now to my kind reviewers...
Rachel the Almighty: It's always good to have new people! Thanks for the review and please keep on reading, ok? Ah, and Dancing Queen has always been one of my fav songs!
Dreamality: As you could see, nothing really happened between Elrohir and Eowyn in fact, besides friendship... But it seems that Faramir and Eomer didn't take it so well, isn't it? Lol! Oh I also love Eldarion! Have you read any of Uineniel's stories about him? They're so cute! Anyway here's the "party", I hope you like it! Thanks for reviewing and being so patient with my story!
