Disclaimer: See first Chapter

Authors Note: To clear up a few things, some of you may get the impression that I don't like Harry Potter from this little parody of the game but I can tell you that's definitely not true. I am a very big dork and in love with Harry Potter. Well…not like actually in love because I'm a guy…I mean like…I….uh….(Shuts up now)

Harry: (Steps into restricted section of library. Looks up about four stories to where the book he needs sits) Oh yeah they couldn't have just made it a single story, they had to put it FOUR freakin' stories up. (Walks over to ladder) Well I guess I'll just climb up and get it. (Climbs up a story when the ladder ends on a small platform) Wait. Why does the ladder stop? (Looks across the room and sees another ladder that continues up, the only way of getting over to the ladder being sliding along a small ledge about four inches long) Oh you're kidding me right?

EAGODS: No we're not kidding you.

Harry: Oh COME ON! I'm 16 not a ninja. So I'm supposed to edge my way along this tiny little outjut, dodging flying books that could knock me off and potentially make me fall to my doom?

EAGODS: …It would appear that way.

Harry: (Starts edging along the ledge) Stupid Neville…stupid lack of story line…stupid game…grr (Gets hit by a flying book) OW! (Eventually makes it up to the book, nabs it, and climbs back down) Ok I got the stupid Diffindo spell. (Starts to walk out)

Gamecube: (Makes loud clicking noise and mysteriously stops playing the background music)

Harry: (Stops before leaving and raises an eyebrow) Hello? …What happened to the music?

Gamecube: Er…

Harry: (Stands there waiting for music) So…there's no music… *giggles* I've always wanted to try this (Raises his wand) Accio Guitar! (Grabs Guitar)

Buddy Harry: (plays guitar and bounces) All of my love, all of my kissin' you don't know what you've been a missin' oh boy, when you're with me oh boy, I want the world to see that you were a meant for me…ALL of my-

Hermione: Stop that.

Buddy Harry: (Jumps) AHH! (Gasps for air) Hermione you scared the crap out of me! What are you doing here?

Hermione: You took so long I decided to come see if you'd died or something. Besides somebody had to stop you from making this horrible joke.

Buddy Harry: (Holds up guitar) What? There was no music so I decided to make my own. You don't think I bear a strange resemblance to Buddy Holly?

Hermione: …No, and besides even if, it's still not funny (Takes guitar and smashes it) Can we please get back to the story?

Harry: WHAT STORY! THERE'S A STORY IN THE BOOK! THE GAME TOOK OUT ALL TRACES OF A—

LOADING

Scene: Back in the common room.

Harry: I'm going to bed.

Ron: First you should go see Fred and George!

Harry: Didn't they leave the school?

Ron: First you should go see Fred and George!

Harry: I thought they left-

Ron: First you should go

Harry: I GOT IT! Are they still set up in the bathroom?

Ron: Yup! You can buy all kinds of things from them.

Harry: (walks into next room grumbling)

Percy: LOCOMOTOR MORTIS! (Shoots at Harry and binds his legs together)

Harry: What are you doing!

Percy: I hate to be disturbed when I'm studying.

Harry: How do you know I didn't want to study?

Percy: Well I'm special so I get this entire study room to myself.

Harry: You do know I'm not 11 anymore right? You DO know that you graduated RIGHT? What are you even doing here?!

Percy: You think the talented people at EA have time to reprogram someone to try and stop you from getting to the other end of this room to buy stuff you'll never use from Fred and George?

Harry: I think they should stick to Sports Games.

Percy: (whispers to Harry while pushing him out of the room) We all do Harry, we all do.

EAGODS: *zaps Percy to pieces*

Harry: Well since I got caught…I guess I'll just turn around and try again. (Turns around and goes back into the room. Walks to the other end and crawls through portrait)

Fred: Welcome Harry, to Weasley's Wizarding Wheezes!

Harry: Uh, hi.

George: Take a look around, and just ask if you want to buy anything.

Harry: Why do you guys set up shop in a bathroom, that's only accessible through a portrait in the study room? How do you ever expect to ever sell anything?

Fred: Well you're the only one who ever comes to buy anything Harry.

Harry: Well that would explain it. (Takes a look around. Picks up a Chocolate Frog Card) A limited edition Bertie Bott's Card! I'll take this. I think I have a few galleons (Digs around in his coin bag)

George: We don't accept money here Harry.

Harry: …I'm not performing any "favors"

Fred: No, no Harry. We accept the only universally accepted currency here at Hogwarts. Bertie Bott's Every Flavor Beans!

Harry: You want me to pay you in…candy?

George: Yup.

Harry: Ok so where do I get this candy then?

Fred: Well you can find it everywhere around Hogwarts! Like if you search desk, bushes, trees, the insides of goblins, treasure chest.

Harry: So wait…you want me to give you beans that pop out of the creatures I'll fight? Isn't that disgusting?

George: Probably

Fred: Here Harry try it (Puts a bean down in front of Harry)

Harry: (Picks it up)

Harry's Voice: Ungh Sardine flavored!

Harry: Wait I didn't say that.

Harry's Voice: It's an auto response when you pick up a bean, to tell you what flavor you ate.

Harry: But I didn't eat it. I put it in my bag to give to Fred & George so I can buy thing. So how on earth do I know what flavor it is?

Harry's Voice: ………..Yuck dung flavored!

Harry: Stop that it's not funny!

Harry's Voice: Icky butt flavored!

Harry: STOP IT! Ok well I'll see you guys later I guess, even though I probably never ever need to buy anything from you do I?

Fred: Nope. See ya' Harry.

DAY 2

Harry: (Runs downstairs to the common room)

Hermione: Harry! We-

Harry: Where do you sleep Hermione? There's only one set of stairs and it's to the boy's dormitory.

Hermione: It's hidden Harry so boys don't go there.

Harry: No it's not. *points* it used to be right over there. Until EA took over. I'm sick of this not having any story line. It's pointless. Could I at least have SOME small piece of plot to keep my interest?

Ron: Geez fine. Let's go to Defense Against the Dark Arts with our new teacher elddiR moT.

Harry: Ok I know Mrs. Rowling has a thing about putting words backwards and stuff but isn't that a bit obvious?

Ron: Whatever do you mean Harry?

Harry: I mean elddiR moT? Tom Riddle? Hello. That's not a very good plot point.

Ron: Fine you want more?

Harry: Please.

Hermione: (Steps up to Harry looking down at the ground) Um…Harry?

Harry: Yeah.

Hermione: I think…I think I have feelings for you.

Harry: (Looking at her slowly) You….what?

Ron: (Grabs Harry and drags him out of the portrait hole, and along the hallway)

Harry: WAIT! WHAT ARE YOU DOING!

Ron: Harry come on, you can't expect the people at EA to tie together every little bit of story they give you like any competent company. Of course they're going to give you things in the plot that will never be resolved, mainly because they forgot about it.

Harry: SO WAIT *struggles* YOU MEAN WHAT SHE JUST SAID MEANS NOTHING!

Ron: To the overall story…no. I told you it's all about attending classes, box puzzles, and a show down with Voldemort which will probably be incredibly easy and if not it's ok because there is a save point right next to him and you get infinite tries.

Harry: (Looking as if he's about to cry) I think I hate EA…

Ron: I think we all do Harry, I think we all do. Come on follow me. (Runs further down the stairs)

Harry: (Runs after Ron) Hey Ron how come my wand sparkles at the end and no one else's does? Why does it sparkle?

Ron: Because you're special. Plus you can shoot flipendo at people and run around rampant with magic and no one will care! You don't even lose house points.

Harry: Well I guess that's a plus. Well should we go into the class now?

That's it for the second installment. Expect everything to be resolved *or not so* in the 3rd and final chapter coming soon. Expect FLYING, QUIDDITCH, and that showdown with VOLDEMORT!

Harry: That is if I don't kill myself before it's all over.

Don't worry Harry once the credits are done so are you!

Harry: *gulps* what?